Work Text:
Lucifer is enthusiastically talking with Master Kim. It was amazing to use this secret “call centre”, as sinners started to call it, to make a call to his old master. The old master was genuinely surprised by his own redemption, as that was not what he was aiming for, but after kind angels talked to him and he met Sir Pentious, he got nicely settled there.
Sir Pentious is pleasant enough and intuitively understands craftsmanship, so they became friends quickly. At least he was not feeling alone in his experiences in Hell – having someone there who understands helps immensely.
Master Kim already has a new workshop up there. The Devil was surprised how fast he was capable to open one, but skills talk for themselves. Creating jewellery and teaching new pupils, there was no reason to not allow it.
The fallen angel could now talk with the master about all the novel materials the old man had at hand or about new styles that Heaven typically preferred. It was bliss to discuss with him about creating new things.
“So, now that we have exhausted all topics for today,” a jolly old voice is heard from the glowing screen, where eyes instantly caught a glint of mischief, “would you tell me, Lucifer, if you finally used the unique creation that got me here and asked Master Alastor that significant question?”
With a golden glow on his face, the King of Hell shifted in his seat, “Ah, haha, yeah no… not yet…”
“Lucifer, it’s a crime to hide that masterpiece! You made it to scientifically show entire Hell that the Radio Demon is yours, did you not?”
“YES!”
The Devil shrinks back into his seat again, “But for that to happen, I require your help with something first…”
Master Kim cautiously raises one eyebrow. Help from him?
…
Few private booths to the left, Cherri Bomb was listening carefully to Penny as he was explaining to her his most recent project in Heaven. Something about watching newly released movies from Earth?
She did wonder for a second if that would be piracy, but whatever, not her problem.
The cyclops woman could watch him for hours explaining something, he was so adorable with his excitement. Well, his brilliant mind got better and it felt less isolated since they started with those calls. After all, no matter how nice angels or winners are, or how much you can get or have around you, it will be hard if all your friends are not with you.
“And then, we used one of your previous airships! Baxter patched it up, I was inside, making sure it would crash into that fucking tower those bastards made! It was amazing and really eye-catching so we could save Angel Dust,” she got shy for a moment, “but it exploded then, so… it didn’t survive its endeavour.”
“It’ss okay, my dearesst! I would rather for my friendss to be ssafe than ssome old airship,” Sir Pentious told her with a gentle smile.
At that point he thought about something for a second, his face showing all of his emotions, but mostly uncertainty: “Cherri, is there an angel in Hell?”
…
The fallen angel was nervous. His dearest master was able to help him—really quickly, actually—so he was in the same booth, waiting respectfully for another call.
When he heard a click, Lucifer wanted to jump from his seat.
Someone picked up his call, listened to Alastor’s warning message, and then the glowing screen finally connected, showing him the person on the other side.
“Ehm… GOOD AFTERNOON! Eh, I know you don’t recognize me—“
“That was my son’s voice.”
Oh, wow, that stern tone. Nice, but oh so stern… haha, it was still nothing compared to that sharp glare.
“Haha… yes,” amazing first impression, congrats Lucifer.
“Hmmm,” wow, exactly the same as his gracious queen, this undoubtedly had to be the original, “please, explain yourself, young man. Who are you and why does my son threaten people in a voice message?”
The devil examined the winner in the eyes. Beautiful doe, chocolate-brown eyes. Sharp as ice. Ouch.
Come on, Lucifer, you talked to Father, you can tell Alastor’s mother why you called her.
“So—“ with a big hand movement, the fallen angel started to explain everything.
…
With the bowl of melted ice cream, a lot of ordered fast food, and already a few messy spots here and there, Charlie and Emily were sitting on the bed. Her dear seraphim friend had been with her for countless hours already, talking.
Charlie carefully opened her eyes to the angel already sitting by her side, for a second thinking it was her guardian angel – Alastor. It was a little disappointing it was not him, but she was thankful Emily was there. For the first time in… a really long time, the Princess of Hell talked about everything.
About the complex situation in Hell, about her parents, her friends, about all the foolish mistakes she now knows she made, about how badly she messed up and how it inevitably created an amazing domino effect, and about how she is now alone in the empty hotel.
It was hard, like really hard. Even that was a great realization about how many times she asked sinners just to expose themselves to her, expecting it from them like it was not their deepest wounds and regrets, but just some boring retelling of a lousy movie or something. Ouch.
Emily was listening to her patiently. She asked her specific questions that would help her understand some parts of… Hell's common sense, and then she was there for her when she again broke down crying.
The kind angel then explained to her how she watched her (and Alastor) and how then, accidentally, many more angels came to watch her adventure. For that, Emily humbly apologized. It was her embarrassing mistake, she was too distracted, but she was really glad she was able to watch her.
It brought her experiences that many older angels, mainly Sera, were shielding from her to the point it was harmful. Like… baskets? Really? How could she come up with that?
After they shared grievances, their embarrassing moments, their mistakes, and their earnest hopes and ambitious plans to get better, they cried a little more.
With red eyes, Charlie finally found some of her resolve.
“I need to think about everything properly, so my apologies actually mean something. I also need to decide on next steps: how to repair my relationships and the hotel,” finished Charlie seriously.
Emily nods, “Yes, that is a good idea. I desperately need to educate myself more about… well, life and the world itself.”
The two women shared a smile full of understanding.
“Oh! Alastor was an amazing angel! A guardian angel at that. Can you believe even Sera thought that someone sneaked into Hell to help you?”
The angel giggled, amused at that thought.
“Haha, what? I mean… I can’t blame them. He is a perfect angel if he genuinely wants to be…” The Princess thought for a moment, “But really? In the eyes of an angel as old as Sera, he looked like a real angel?"
“Yes,” those cheerful nods were fast, “I think younger angels were in awe and were looking up to him.”
She started counting on her fingers: “Patient, graceful, calm, elegant, helpful, kind but serious. That is a perfect guardian angel.”
Emily looked at Charlie with a nice smile: “I am sure Sera will tell them who he really is.”
Charlie nodded at that.
…
The Devil was interrogated and it was horrifying. After a brief explanation, her first proper sentence to him was:
“Call me Agatha, dear, and tell me more. If the devil himself wants my son, you better explain why I should allow it?”
Oh Father, why should she allow it? He IS a walking disaster!
“Agatha,” he started to sweat – him, THE SERPENT! – “I know about my weaknesses, but I am doing my best to overcome them. I sincerely want to be my best self for him.”
At that, she gave him a nod.
“Hmmm, continue.”
Father, help me!
…
In another one of the private booths, Angel Dust was contentedly sitting and talking. He at long last has someone he can talk their ears off to about his grumpy cat – Molly! His twin sister is in heaven, and she was ecstatic to hear from him, finally.
They talked a lot, like a lot! Gossip from both sides flooded in, talking enthusiastically about familiar people that got to their side of the afterlife.
There were still a few things he didn’t feel like instantly sharing… yet, but he had to share his lover with her!
About how he saved him, how he is living peacefully with him, how they meet with friends a few times a week, how he works in a theatre and started teaching Italian cooking.
Molly talked about her hobbies, how she works at a restaurant, and how she spends time with her loyal friends up there.
It was nice, someone who dearly love you even if you are… you.
They heartily agreed to talk again, and Angel Dust felt lighter.
…
“Uh, hmm…”
Lucifer was waiting respectfully. Agatha finally finished interro- asking questions. The Devil talked about himself, he talked about Alastor, and he even showed her the precious ring he made for him.
She was listening to every single word, dissecting it and properly judging it.
“I guess there is only one problem left to solve.”
Okay, that’s good? One more hurdle and she willingly agrees?
He smiles sheepishly, hopefully charmingly enough.
“How will I get to Hell for the wedding? And for planning? I naturally want to be there when my only son will finally get married.”
At that, she merely raised one expressive eyebrow, intensely staring at him.
“Oh…”
FUCK!
…
Lilith was yelling at her modern phone. The only person responding her from Heaven is Lute. Rosie is not quite sure who else would, but… it was not good enough. It was clear her friend wants to return up there, but she is not welcome. Now that redemption is a thing, she is supposed to get there the “correct way.” Lilith was unhappy about it. Lute didn’t help, she was making fun of her, showing how much she hated demons.
Rosie herself was thinking about her life right now. She lost her best puppet – Alastor. And only now she realized that even on her short leash, he possessed so many well-kept secrets. He disappeared.
Not like before when that was her doing, he was most of the time here with her. No, he was gone. If he won’t show himself, no one will find him. Not the King, or those little sinners. She prevented her cannibals from entering his part of the city – Susan was sent back in over 20 separate packages.
Why did she think that going to reprimand him for his manners during the Vox attack was clever? Her cannibals vehemently disagreed with her – they liked Alastor as one of their own. Her personal actions are frowned upon. Somewhere deep within her, she knew that in case of her violent death, her town would fall into his cruel claws.
Lilith launched her phone at her table, breaking all that beautiful porcelain, spilling the delicious tea, and making all her ladyfingers fall. Not the best wakeup call from daydreaming.
Why was she friends with her?
… Alastor was better than her in so many more ways, now that she thinks about it.
…
The fallen angel left the Call Centre and was intentionally hiding on a boat, one hand in the sparkling water, exhausted, with his beloved ducks swimming around, giving him his energy back. Agatha willingly gave him her blessing, thanks to Father, but he did promise to get her down here for a very future wedding. A very, very, very future one if he won’t grow some balls.
With a mighty sigh, he looked at his hellphone, wondering who would be the best one to generously help him with the promise he made. Not Sera, she is soooo scared of sinners and Hell, even when she agrees with Charlie’s hotel. Still, it has to be someone in a high position up there.
Another sigh and he scrolls through names on his hellphone, tapping on one. It rings and rings, until the other person finally picks up.
“Yes?”
“… Good evening, Michael.”
…
A still tired Alastor was slowly sipping lovely tea in one of the offices while Zestial looks out of the inner windowed wall at all the souls that are making calls to Heaven. His interesting friend only just finished a lengthy explanation about this amusing place – commonly known as the call centre. He was also delightful enough to retell the unique adventures he took the beloved princess to experience on Earth.
This place… excellent. And therefore interesting. Alastor’s brilliant ideas should be treated as treasure.
The connection this place has is great. If Alastor wants, he can go to Earth without Asmodean crystals or some severely restricting summoning.
Though it may seem strange at his age, he giggled when Alastor informed him how much Lucifer appreciates this place. Their king wholly wants to acquire so many animals – maybe his lively, caring, and bright personality will faithfully recreate Paradise here. It would be something Pride would try.
Nevertheless, this place demonstrates amazing potential, and those few who comprehend what this place’s intended purpose is will never spill it. After all, no sinner should be capable to leave Hell. Calls… a witty cover-up.
“So, if you ever desire it, you can go visit some places you miss or even make calls if you feel like it, my dear friend,” proposed Alastor.
“I’m not certain… that I should ever take you up on this generous offer. Much appreciated for your consideration, though,” gracefully thanks Zestial.
With an understanding nod from Alastor, he gently sighs and goes back to watching local demons down there, merrily talking to their family members in Heaven. Memories of his own family resurface. It was a disaster, but he still loves his younger brothers, even if it is unlikely they like him back.
The knowledgeable overlord let himself slip into deep thoughts, thankful to his friend who offered him this chance, but not sure if he ever should make any of the calls he is currently thinking about.
…
Today, Lucifer talked more than ever before. Probably not.
Maybe explaining more than ever before? Eeeeh, yeah, no. At any rate, it took him an hour of uninterrupted talking to tell everything to his brother. And Michael was saintly and patient with him, waiting until he finished.
“… that is the reason that Lilith calls constantly?”
“She what?”
“Calls. Constantly. She most likely wants to get back to Heaven and continue her comfortable vacation,” Michael explained clearly, “but she was here only because Adam required her here. Sinners are not allowed to stay, and she can try that redemption, even though I highly doubt it.”
“… she was there with Adam?”
Oh, oooh… OOOH NO.
Lucifer was not hurt, hah, not anymore. He was repulsed.
“You should probably explain that vacation to me, but… ew, now that I think about it! Whatever, I couldn’t care less if she slept her way up. EW, EEEW! But I want you to allow Alastor’s mother to come here for the wedding.”
Now Michael was disgusted, distinguished by the sounds he made on the call when Lucifer described how his ex, probably (surely), got to Heaven, but he listened attentively to his request.
“Hm, only if we will be there as well,” was the final answer.
Promptly the devil was confused.
“We?”
“Naturally, “we”, your brothers. We want to be there for your wedding.”
“… what?”
This call to Heaven just got longer.
…
The End