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It was 11 in the afternoon on a Sunday. Doughael sat their fat ass on the couch. Kai's couch. Kai is Doughael's 'husband', put in quotes because Doughael never even wanted his ass! Kai has a history with forcing people into marriage. Nobody knows what happened to Stardust cookie.. and Doughael is too afraid to find out where Kai could've possibly kept him. Doughael wants out of this marriage, but how...?
Kai was always jealous of Clown. Because Clown is a million times cooler than him. Clown and Kai often have beef and fight because of his jealousy. But what hes jealous of, most of all.. is his relationship. Clown has a Relationship with a baddie they/them diva pussy god named Obscure Umbra cookie. They're the better Doughael. Both cookies are cult leaders but Obscure Umbra cookie didnt die in the same update they were released in. Kai often sat in the distance, angrily growling as he watched Clown and Obscure Umbra. Fuming at the two being super healthy and cool.
"How....how did that clown fix them?!"
Kai would angrily think out of anger. Unable to comprehend a healthy relationship, since Doughael never loved him in the first place!
Well, now it's time for a wedding. Because Clown and Obscure Umbra were engaged! Now they're unengaging and marriaging! Kai was invited solely out of pity. Since Clown and everyone knows him and Doughael have a bad relationship. Yet it wasnt known the reason their relationship was loveless.. is all Kai!
The ceremony was beautiful, exquisite, and pretty. The flowers were red because Obscure umbra cookie is red . Perchance. Obscure Umbra cookie was in a beautiful wedding dress. They're pretty. Meanwhile Clown was in a tuxedo because hes a boy. Everyone was crying out of joy because they are such a good couple. But, Kai wasnt having it. He sulked and looked angry at the sexy couple. Since Kai was here, he made Doughael come too. Doughael watched Clown and Obscure Umbra at the ceremony. Jealousy rushed through them. This is what.. a happy relationship looked like. Something they had never experienced before. Being with Kai made them realize something.. they can do so much better than to be with this loser. Kai suddenly nudged Doughael, causing them to flinch because they were spacing out. Kai said they should just dip since he hates these two. Doughael.. had enough!!! They stood up from the chair as the groom and bridoom held hands. They looked over at the commotion.
"You are a terrible husband! I never wanted this marriage! You sleep sloppy! You are stinky! You have bad takes! And guess what? I THINK ANANAS AND WIND ARCHER IS MID."(this is not writers opinion Kai please dont hurt me)
They sobbed. Everyone whispering. Kai was embarrassed cuz he was caught. But before he can speak, Doughael threw a chair at him which instantly killed him. Now Kai is dead. Clown and Obscure Umbra pretended like that didnt happen and they kissed, while Kai is laying there. Doughael realizes that.. they don't need a man. They need themselves. They enjoyed the rest of the ceremony while Kai is dead on the floor.
The end!!!!!! Written by Clown (yes. The one in the stor!( based on true events