Work Text:
Do you remember the barracks
Do you remember playing strat ball
Do you remember when it was just us
Do you remember how you helped me when I needed you
Do you remember me helping you when you needed me
I’m sorry I needed you more
How I should’ve seen it before
Not only how you felt
Not only what you were going through
But what I was doing to you
Don’t take my actions over my words
Your words matter I’m sorry I took what I wanted for you as priority
You were my priority
Do you remember falling asleep on my shoulder?
Overworking to get the best score
Saying how you need to do be the best bot
You were the only bot that mattered
No one could change that
You always took the fall
I wish you saw how highly I viewed you
How much worth you were
More than the energon you served
You’re not here anymore
Did you know you never needed me?
Do you regret befriending me?
Do you regret joining me the surface?
Do you regret ever helping me?
Do you regret learning?
What would you do if I told you?
How my sparks spin when I see you
How it never stopped even when I was with the core
Can you process it’ll never stop spinning
Never stop yearning
Would you make it harder?
If you knew then would you let me go then too?
If I told you then would you have hold back?
When I see my reflection I see you beside me
Looking over your shoulder in disdain
No matter how hard I bite then bleed I wish those optics would look at me in a different way
I miss when you fell asleep on my shoulder
I miss playing strat ball
I miss when it was just us
The only mechs that know
Questions
Sympathize
Can you empathize?
Venting slowly
I can’t hold it in
It’ll spill through my servos
Founded ourselves in a cave
Those orange optics returned
You detached your fusion cannon
Let it roll away
“The war isn’t over but I’ll listen to your lies”
Don’t you know the power you hold?
How easily my spark can be crushed by your servos?
Spark weak against your frame
“Did you ever figure?”
A silent no in the air
“How am I supposed to confess to a mech that hates me?”
A small shake of the helm
“You know I didn’t always hate you”
A small scoff
“And if you hadn’t, it wouldn’t stop the war”
A sigh
“No, it wouldn’t. Yet would it stop you?”
A shutter of optics
“Stop me what? Fighting you or admitting it?”
A shrug
“Both”
A sigh from a different intake
“I wouldn’t stop fighting you and I’m saying it now aren’t I?”
A small smirk
“You’re not outright saying it”
A small tsk
“And humiliate myself to my enemy? Don’t need to add anymore to my misery”
A move of pedes
A lift of my helm from a servo
“Does it not kill your curious spark? How am I supposed to give you a proper response?”
A heavy vent
“I love you… Megatron… I always have. I always will.”
A small glare
“Even if I killed millions? Even if I hurt all of your allies?”
A defeated frown
“Even then yes…”
Confusion followed by a bite to the lip
“You’ve always been a fool… But in all sincerity I couldn’t tell you who’s the bigger fool between us.”
A silent gasp
Sealed lips
Servos roam
Weak spark against a hard spark
Only if there was no casing in between
“Maybe neither of us is more of a fool than the other but we might be the biggest fools in the universe”
A small chuckle
A shove against the wall
Pinned
Weakness against harshness
Devoured
Solvent shared
Heavy vents in between
Enough time passed
A separation
A returned fusion canon
Red orange optics
A slow slide against the caverns wall
A defeated spark
“So no peace talks huh?”
A small glance
“Nothing has to change because of this revelation. I fought you before, I can continue to do so. And I expect you to be able to as well.”
A vent
“I didn’t consider it to be that easy.”
A thrown pebble that bounces off the wall
A silent beat
“If it’s any consolation… As much as a part of me hates you… The whole me hates myself for loving you too.”
The war continued
Nothing was supposed to change
Was that what you wanted?
Or was that what you were hoping for?
Do you find yourself more of the fool?
Hitting softer?
Missing your mark?
Lingering stares
Servos roam to where they shouldn’t be
I don’t remember who pulled to who first to privacy
But I know it was you who sealed us together again
Maybe I’ll take responsibility
For bringing you in
For pulling you aside
For capturing your spark
For allowing your servos
For never commenting
For never pushing
Only allowing
“Someone will notice”
“They wouldn’t check on us.”
A shake to the helm
A servo to a cheek
“This isn’t all we have to hide”
A bite to the lip
A small hesitation
A pull so harsh
A claim so rough
This weak spark will take it
Again and again
A plan so despicable
Can’t even be fathomed
A metal helm found shoved to the dirt
“How dare you!?”
A rage unfounded
Not of my own but felt much the same
No optic contact
Just struggling
Defending but not attacking
Punch after punch
Shover after shove
Neck held against the ground
“Explain yourself!”
A spillage of energon from your intake
“Not so easy to ignore now. Is it, Prime?”
“Damn you!”
A punch
“You think of this a game!?”
A punch
“Stooping yourself so low for what?! To test me?!”
A punch
“These are lives, Megatron! What we have is between us! Don’t drag others into our mess. If you have any vexes about me, let your anger out on me! There is no reason to get others involved!”
Pulled up
To then slam over and onto the ground again
My servo returned to your neck
Those orange optics were there since you arrived
A quiet sigh
“You were right… Optimus. They noticed. A subordinate suggested the idea. I only went through it so they didn’t question it. Even before you revealed your sentiments, I wouldn’t have gone through such a plan. It is not much but I am indeed sorry.”
A roar of anger
Before storming off
(A slow sitting up left with only the processor and seeing a blue mech go)
So much devastation
More of me
Troops recovered
So much ache
The morale was down
Couldn’t return to the battlefield
Wouldn’t return
The mechs that know
Disrespects
Disappointed
Those optics were still orange
A silent anguish scream
Dreaming of those optics to return
Is this what it takes?
For you to forgive?
For you to change your processor?
Does it finally fill you with regret?
This weak spark can’t take it no more
Your request of my presence in silent comms
Anger driven my pedes
Rage filled the trail of my wheels
Almost threw another punch
Only heavy vent filled the night air
Orange optics stared in quiet awe
Or maybe horror
Or maybe regret
“You usually have your mask down by now…”
Only a quiet glare
A quiet defeated sigh
“Remember you said we should keep our vexes between us? I’ll fight you back if that’s what you need but this isn’t good for your troops.”
A tsk
A move of pedes to return home
“Optimus! Wait.”
A shuffle of pedes and a quick quiet of metal unlatching
“I wanted to give you these… Before I was questioned.”
They were blue flowers with the red flowers they first saw on the surface
Before the plan they would’ve been life changing
Life altering
A new perspective
A different kind of chapter
An almost crush bouquet
Thrown to the ground
“You think I would let you continue your sentiments after what you’ve done!? Damn how I feel! What makes you think I want to continue our affair after such an act?!”
Defeated orange optics
Opposing tearful blue
“Optimus…”
A step of pedes closer
Pedes backwards
“No! No…”
Pedes move closer
Grasping my wrist to not go any further away
“Optimus… I shouldn’t have done it. My legitimacy be damned. I truly did think that it would have made the war easier for us but it’s only weigh heavier on both of our sparks… I don’t think I ever hated you. I think I was only fooling myself to make you the enemy… I’ve always loved you, Optimus. Please let me amend what I done. Let me court you officially and end this war. This weak spark can’t bear our separation any longer.”
A weak spark against a harsh spark
Frustration and longing mixed
“Damn you, Megatron”
Sealed lips
Falling down to the ground
Devouring
Holding on tight
Servos roam
Silver metal parts
A silent question
Red metal parts
A silent response
A bliss unimagined
Two into one
An unbreakable bond
New coding
A connection never to be undone
Feelings
Thoughts
Forever shared
A ‘I love you’ forever repeated
A separation to never happen again
More than the barracks
More than strat ball
Only us