Work Text:
Blitzø was a demon of many, many great ideas. Everything his big brain and excellent imagination came up with was a winner, from the niche he'd cornered within Hell's overcrowded assassination industry to the name of his business. He'd even include his everyday ideas, like his brilliantly creative new booby traps he'd set on their safe or the way he'd figured out how to hit the coffee machine in IMP's kitchen just right to stop it from spitting out sludge. Even if SOME people had a hard time recognizing his genius—certain short, bow-tied, annoying little shits who only came up with the most boring ideas EVER but insisted they were smarter than Blitzø just because they'd finished college or read a dictionary before, fuckin' congrats, Moxxie—Blitzø knew that eventually, everyone would see how brilliant he'd always been. Haters gonna hate, but he'd just keep on running figurative (and sometimes literal) laps around them.
But one of Blitzø's best ideas ever was definitely hiring Stolas as IMP's secretary. It was the perfect solution for at least 25% of Blitzø's problems—Loony now got to do fieldwork like she wanted, Stolas was happy to have something to do that came easily to him but gave him plenty of time to write in his notebook or whatever else he wanted, and Blitzø? Blitzø got to have his bird nearby all day, every day, along with the satisfaction of seeing his business grow.
Except maybe—not that this was something Blitzø would ever say out loud, because fuck you Moxxie—but maybe it was also kind of a bad idea. Not a terrible one! It's just… he hadn't really thought about how fucking hot it was to have Stolas as his secretary until the first time Stolas had told him "yes boss" and Blitzø just about came in his pants right then and there. And that actually wouldn't have been a bad thing if he and Stolas weren't trying to take their whole thing slow and mature or whatever but, well. It felt a little backwards to Blitzø to "see where things go" after fucking for months, having a huge break up, and then risking their lives for each other and now living and working together, but Stolas had thought it was a good idea and Blitzø wasn't going to risk fucking things up between them again. Besides, Stolas was really fucking smart and one of the very few people that Blitzø thought had some brilliant ideas too.
That didn't mean Blitzø wasn't suffering, though. It had been somewhat manageable at the start when it was just a little comment here, a little gesture of respect there that Blitzø could push from his mind quickly enough by mentally reciting the names of every one of his horse OCs. But before he knew it, Stolas was calling him boss every time he addressed Blitzø at work and constantly interrupted their conference room meetings to say "wonderful idea, boss," or greet Blitzø when he returned from a mission with a "well done, boss." And by now Blitzø had cleared his throat aggressively, or shuffled into his office or the bathroom as quickly as possible to beat one off, so many times that there was almost no way Stolas hadn't noticed, but Blitzø just didn't want to be the one to make things awkward when Stolas had very reasonably asked for space.
And today, Blitzø knew for sure that he was going to lose it, because this weekend while Blitzø had been coming out of the shower Stolas had been on the couch, scrolling through his phone, and casually called out without even looking at Blitzø—
"Blitzy, have you ever heard of an office siren?"
—and Blitzø had promptly turned around and marched himself right back into the bathroom to masturbate about his impending doom. Stolas had gone out and returned with half a dozen shopping bags that same afternoon, and Blitzø spent the rest of the weekend trying not to think about what was inside of them while also coming to terms with the fact that he was going to die on a fucking Monday, of all the days of the week to bite it. He'd left the crystal with Stolas this morning, shouting through the bathroom door as the bird showered that he had to run to pick Moxxie and Millie up in the van for an early morning mission and Stolas could follow whenever he was ready, since Loona had taken the day off to recover from a blowout party at Queen Bee's.
And now, he had been sitting at his desk for almost an hour waiting for Stolas to come in, practically vibrating with anticipation as his tail swished sharply behind him and trying to doodle while the clock ticked to his inevitable doom. His breath hitched as he overheard Stolas entering the reception area and greeting Millie and Moxxie, his tail whipping faster, and he took a deep, slow inhale just before a knock rapped at his door.
"Yepppp, come- I mean, just get in here," Blitzø flustered as he tented his hands on his desk, starting his mental roll call. Bleu Cheese, King Slut, Banana Boat—
The door opened and Blitzø just about choked on air as Stolas strolled in, holding a folder in the crook of his elbow, leaving no aspect of his outfit blocked from view. A purple button-down blouse with a plunging sweetheart neckline hugged Stolas like a second skin while his fluffy chest feathers spilled out like cleavage. A black, soft-knit skirt hit mid-thigh, already kind of riding up on one side. Stolas's makeup was impeccable, winged eyeliner sharp and fierce, and as he smiled shyly at Blitzø it took every ounce of Blitzø's willpower not to drool.
"Well? What do you think?" Stolas asked, giving a little twirl that highlighted the curve of his ass that got Blitzø half hard before he could even blink.
"I… it's, um, you—" Blitzø swallowed. "You look good, Stolas," he said as he struggled to hold any sort of composure.
Stolas pouted. "Just 'good,' really? I was hoping for a little more than that, boss."
"You look so fuckin' hot," Blitzø blurted out before he could stop himself, eyes widening before he dropped his head into his hands with a groan to hide the dark flush rising to his cheeks. "Shit, Stols, I'm sorry, but you're killing me here, all right? I'm really, really trying, but—"
A soft chuckle interrupted Blitzø's ramble, and he picked his head up to see Stolas smirking coyly at him, like—oh.
"You… you motherfucker," Blitzø said even as his mouth curved into a wicked grin. "You were the one who wanted to go slow."
"Yes, well…" Stolas looked Blitzø up and down dangerously. "I started to notice that you seemed to get a little, shall we say, heated when I treated you with the respect that a big boss like you deserves. And I suppose I just wanted to see how long it would take your resolve to weaken like you made mine."
"Christ on a stick, Stolas, use less fancy words when you're talking sexy to me," Blitzø said huskily as he stood up and stalked around to the front of his desk, leaning against the edge of it as his hands spread out to steady him while he leered at Stolas.
"Yes, boss. Whatever you say."
Blitzø growled as his tail snapped excitedly. "Fuck, Stols, if you keep this up…"
Stolas gave him the biggest bedroom eyes, looking up at Blitzø through his lashes. "I'll do anything you ask me to, boss. After all, every idea you have is just… brilliant."
"Anything, huh?" Blitzø's eyes glinted. "Throw that paperwork on the floor."
Stolas daintily pinched the folder between two of his talons. "Yes, boss." He flicked it away, papers flying loose as the stack hit the floor. "Fantastic idea, boss. Why should you need to fill out those forms anyway when you have a secretary who can do it for you."
Blitzø stifled a moan as he palmed his cock over his pants. "Unbutton that top," he commanded as he started to rub up and down his length.
"As you wish, boss," Stolas said primly as his delicate talons made quick work of the buttons, letting out an involuntary little gasp as the blouse fell open, chest and stomach now completely exposed. Blitzø drank in the view as he pressed more firmly against his hardening dick in his stroking. "Anything else I can do for you, boss?"
Blitzø's grin turned mischievous. "Fire Moxxie."
Blitzø expected him to protest or at least blink at that request, but Stolas just smiled at him and, without batting an eye, leaned back toward the cracked open door.
"Moxxie?" he called out.
"Yes, Stolas?"
"You're fired," Stolas said matter-of-factly.
"No I'm not," Moxxie responded immediately, exasperated.
"Damnit Moxxie, you're ruining the bit! Just go take a lap or twenty around the building with Mills, Stolas and I are having a highly confidential meeting," Blitzø yelled.
Stolas giggled as he shut the door properly and locked it, blocking out any further sounds of protest coming from Moxxie. He put the door at his back and leaned against it, blushing as he watched the growing tent in Blitzø's pants.
"May I make a suggestion, boss?" he said, pushing himself away from the door and sashaying towards Blitzø with a mischievous smile.
"Uh, yeah. I love suggestions," Blitzø said, heat rising to his cheeks as Stolas bent down so that his face was mere inches from Blitzø's.
Stolas took his time, reaching out and watching as he trailed a talon down Blitzø's chest. "I was thinking… what if I show my appreciation for the boss and make him feel… positively intoxicated with pleasure, if you'll excuse my fancy words, while he directs me and I follow every. Last. One. Of his commands?"
Fuck, Blitzø just barely kept himself from cumming in his pants. He cleared his throat. "Excellent idea, Mr. Secretary. Keep up this kind of initiative and you'll be employee of the month."
Stolas's smile widened. "I learned from the best, boss," he whispered as he leaned in to kiss Blitzø tenderly on the forehead. "And I'll have you know, I will do whatever it takes to earn that title."
Blitzø shuddered, struggling to hold himself back from just taking Stolas roughly right then and there. "Kneel," he ordered roughly.
Stolas obediently sank to his knees in front of Blitzø, bringing his hands to Blitzø's waist to toy with the waistline of his pants. "What should I do next, boss?"
"Take… take off my clothes," Blitzø rasped.
Stolas nodded. "Right away, boss," he purred as he reached for the edges of Blitzø's long coat, pulling it reverently from Blitzø's shoulders as Blitzø extended his arms behind him so Stolas could slip it off. He grabbed the hem of his own shirt as he nodded at Stolas.
"You can skip ahead to my pants," he said, and as Stolas demurely began undo his fly Blitzø pulled his turtleneck over his head and threw it on the ground behind his desk. He shuffled his feet as Stolas tenderly drew off his boots and slid his pants and boxers off, cock springing free as Blitzø groaned. He finished the process by grabbing the edges of Stolas's shirt and stripping it off of him, instantly returning his hands to his chest to knead through the voluminous feathers there as Stolas keened.
"Blitzø… can I please…" Stolas panted as he eyed Blitzø's dick beading with pre-cum.
"Excuse me?" Blitzø said as he grabbed a fistful of chest feathers and tugged firmly, making Stolas moan.
"Boss! Boss, please, can I taste you?" Stolas begged as he planted his hands on the desk, leaning toward Blitzø.
He gestured roughly at his hardened cock. "Go for it."
Stolas nodded as he brought one hand up to gently grasp the base of Blitzø's shaft, Blitzø grunting at the soft pressure. "Thank you, boss," Stolas murmured as Blitzø bit back a moan, before bending his head toward Blitzø's lap and teasing the tip of his dick with little kitten licks, dipping his tongue into the slit. Blitzø panted with the effort to not shoot off as Stolas swirled his long tongue down the shaft and swallowed around it. He released his hold so that he could plunge all the way down, the smooth tip of his beak nestling into Blitzø's pubes, and started playing with his balls.
It was good—better than any of Blitzø's recent wet dreams as he was engulfed in the heat of Stolas's throat—but faced with the silence aside from the sounds of Stolas's sucking and swallowing, Blitzø bit his lip as he started wondering ahead to what he'd ask Stolas to do next. It'd been so long since the two of them had been together like this, and he wanted it to be fucking perfect. And meanwhile, he was doing everything in his power not to release too soon, before he could give Stolas—
"Blitzø? Is everything all right"
Blitzø glanced down, finally noticing that Stolas had pulled off his dick, all four eyes trained on him with concern. He let out a shuddering breath. "Sorry, I just—"
Stolas brought a talon to his lips, gently shushing him. "Can I please make another suggestion, boss?"
Blitzø gazed at him with wide eyes as he nodded. Stolas rested his hand on Blitzø's collarbone as he met his eyes.
"I was thinking that perhaps I could take the lead for a little bit so that you can relax," Stolas said kindly. "After all, a good boss knows when to delegate. And you are an incredible boss… daddy," he tossed in with a playful grin.
Blitzø let out a long, loud shuddering exhale as Stolas waited patiently. "Um… yeah, okay. Let's do that." He looked up at Stolas, hesitating for a moment. "Just… keep telling me what a good boss I am?" he asked, hating how needy he sounded.
"Of course, darling," Stolas cooed without missing a beat, bringing his hand up to cup Blitzø's cheek as he leaned in to brush their mouths together. Blitzø kissed him back, deepening the kiss as he pressed his tongue past Stolas's beak to swirl their tongues around each other. They broke apart finally, a string of saliva trailing between them as Blitzø breathed hard, whimpering as his aching cock sought release. "Can I make a request, boss?" Stolas asked.
"Shoot," Blitzø panted.
Stolas brought his other hand to Blitzø's dick and wrapped his fingers around the base as Blitzø hissed with sensitivity and relief as the pressure staved off his impending orgasm. "Can you save it for me, boss? Let me pleasure you until you burst, filling me with your cum?"
Blitzø gulped. "Y-yes. Stolas."
Stolas smiled, satisfied. "Good boy," he said as he grasped Blitzø's chin commandingly, and if he hadn't been keeping his other hand on Blitzø's dick as a makeshift cock ring Blitzø would have immediately broken his promise. Stolas caressed Blitzø's face adoringly as he leaned in to kiss and mouth along Blitzø's jaw, smiling against him as Blitzø let out sharp, small little gasps at the sensation and tilted his head to give Stolas better access.
"You're one of the cleverest demons in Hell, boss," Stolas breathed in between kisses as he made his way slowly down Blitzø's throat, then across his collarbone as Blitzø trembled and whimpered. "In six thousand years, no one else thought to make a business out of Sinners' desire for revenge on the living. You ignored every idiot who said imps couldn't work for themselves, let alone run a large, successful business, and just look how you've proved them wrong."
Blitzø gulped. "Stolas—"
"I'm not done," Stolas chided gently, scraping his beak over one of Blitzø's nipples before lathing it with his tongue and Blitzø mewled, embarrassingly, but Stolas refused to let up. He mouthed at the hardening nub intermittently between words, while his free hand came around to rub Blitzø's other nipple and Blitzø arched into the touch with a piercing cry. "You recruited the very best staff, and you take such good care of them, boss. They respect you because you've proven you deserve their loyalty, time and time again. Even the fact that they readily banter with you shows that they trust you and are so happy to work for you."
"I- fuck, Stolas—" Blitzø gasped, swallowing as Stolas continued his trail of nips and licks down Blitzø's torso, one hand still toying with his nipple.
"Your daring approach and quick thinking keep this business thriving, and I for one, boss, love each and every one of your ideas." Stolas reached Blitzø's weeping dick and licked a long stripe up the side of it, flicking over the tip to capture the salty taste.
Blitzø sobbed, overwhelmed with the intensity of the physical sensations and the praise Stolas was heaping on him. "Stolas, please—" he pleaded.
"Shhh, I've got you, dearest," Stolas said as he gently pushed Blitzø back, laying him across the desk. He shuffled up so that he now knelt over Blitzø, skirt rolling up to reveal a panty-less, dripping cloaca that had Blitzø salivating. "You've done so, so well, Blitzø. Such a good boy for me."
"Oh fuck—" was all Blitzø could say before he broke off into a long, loud moan as Stolas abruptly dropped down onto Blitzø's lap, hole stretching around his cock even as it clenched and quivered around his shaft. "FUCK!"
Stolas let out the most sinful little whoreish gasps as he began rolling his hips, bringing both hands to Blitzø's chest so that he could rub each of Blitzø's hardened nipples. "Come for me, boss. Whenever you're ready. I'm yours."
"Shit, Stols, you fucking sexy bastard—" Blitzø grunted as he managed a couple of thrusts up into Stolas's cloaca, breaching further inside as Stolas cried out, before he couldn't hold back any longer. His dick pulsed as he shot his release, dissolving into pleasure as he kept cumming longer and harder than he could remember in recent history. Blitzø gasped as time slowed and he felt Stolas's own slick gushing out, their intermixed spends leaking out onto Blitzø's groin and stomach. His brain felt like static, but he gained enough clarity to sit up, reaching for Stolas. Stolas hooted softly as he curled himself down to meet Blitzø for a tender, lazy kiss as they came down from their respective highs.
"Fuuuuuu-ck," Blitzø chuckled out as he gently pulled back from Stolas and ran his fingers through Stolas's head feathers. "That was- fuck, Stolas, that was everything. You're amazing. Thank you."
Stolas cooed as he stroked his talons up and down Blitzø's back, tracing patterns around his spines, and Blitzø shivered. "Thank you, Blitzy. I- I missed you, missed this, so, so much."
"Me too, pretty bird." Blitzø rested his forehead against Stolas's. They sat there in comfortable silence for a couple minutes, basking in the afterglow.
"So… what do you say, boss?" Stolas asked after a while, grinning as he caught Blitzø's eyes. "Did I earn employee of the month?"
Blitzø laughed affectionately. "Fuck yeah you did. Best damn secretary out there."
"Mmm." Stolas cupped Blitzø's cheek. "Well, I did learn from the best boss."
Blitzø beamed as a purr kicked up in his chest, and he held Stolas close to him as he expertly maneuvered Stolas onto his side, without slipping out of him, so that they lay on the desk facing each other. Blitzø tucked his head into Stolas's chest, heaving a huge sigh as the lavender and brimstone scent of Stolas washed over him.
Yeah, no, fuck it. Having Stolas work at IMP was his best idea ever.