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Luo Binghe noticed her while he was being undressed by flurry of soft hands, layer after layer of silk sliding from his body, warm palms caressing his skin, deft fingers pinching his buttocks.

Face flushed a deep red, she stood alone beside the tent flap, a good distance away from the bed and the rest of Luo Binghe’s wives. Her long platinum-blonde hair caught the light of the night pearls and shone like the moon. Unlike the other women who were already in various states of undress, she remained fully clothed—a dress with a high collar and buttons in the Far Western style, long sleeves with puffy shoulders, a balloon skirt that cinched at the waist and billowed in a bubble-shaped fall, and dark leather boots. She wrung her hands, her gaze darting around the room, anywhere but the bed.

“Don’t mind Princess Aniya,” Sha Hualing said, a sharp fingernail digging under Luo Binghe’s chin as she turned his head to face her. “If she’s not joining, it’s her loss.” She bent and licked the seam of Luo Binghe’s lips, coaxing them to part.

“At least we don’t have to fight her off anymore,” the Little Palace Mistress said as she pinched Luo Binghe’s nipple. “Gods, she has the most obnoxious personality.” She rolled her eyes in Princess Aniya’s direction.

Luo Binghe pinched her nipple back and suppressed a chuckle. Out of all his wives, he rather thought that the Little Palace Mistress and Princess Aniya were the most similar in personality. Spoiled, prideful, vindictive. Wild in bed.

He expected the insult to rouse Princess Aniya to action. To storm in, yank on the Little Palace Mistress’ hair. To stare her down with her cold green gaze that could freeze hell over, and slap her on the face.

And yet, Princess Aniya was silent.

Someone planted a soft, wet kiss on his shoulder. “Princess Aniya hasn’t been herself these days. She’s just recovered from a long illness, the poor thing,” Ning Yingying said. “I was surprised she joined the Lizard Hunt. I thought it was too soon.”

Luo Binghe opened his mouth to ask more details; Sha Hualing took the opportunity to finally slip her tongue inside, and the next thing he knew, he was pushed down on the bed, his balls massaged as a warm mouth enveloped his cock. Cushioned by the soft and warm bodies of his wives, he allowed the tide of pleasure to carry him away, drowning all until he no longer had to think of demure wives, pathetic doppelgängers, or the kind, gentle shizun from another world…

The next morning, Luo Binghe climbed a small hill overlooking their camp. Dozens of tents were pitched in the clearing below and a vast forest surrounded them on all sides. The dark green canopy stretched as far as the eye could see.

One by one, people from all walks of life, commoners, soldiers, officials, and select wives, started gathering at the foot of the hill. Everyone was dressed in their best hunting gear. Polished leather arm guards, breast and shoulder plates that gleamed in the sun, shiny combat boots. The crowd chattered among themselves, the air buzzing with excitement.

Luo Binghe raised his hand in a motion for silence and the buzz died down. He gestured to an official standing beside him. The official spoke, the wind carrying his voice across the clearing.

“Lord Luo expresses his pleasure to see his loyal subjects, ministers, and devoted wives gathered here today for the Lizard Hunt.

“Before we begin, allow this games official to lay the ground rules:

“First, the Radiant Scaled Forest is home to a variety of lizard species. Lizards are remarkable for their ability to regrow their tails, a powerful reminder of this animal’s resilience, one that everyone here would do well to emulate. The objective of the hunt is to collect as many tails as possible. Each tail is worth a single point.

“Second, in the interest of fairness, all participants will be required to use only the weapon authorized for this competition. Each one will be provided a common, non-spiritual sword with which they will hunt and chop off the lizard tails.

“Third, there exists an elusive creature, the Gemscale-Girded Golden Gargoyle Gecko, that only lives in the Radiant Scaled Forest. It is recognizable by its glittering scales and nine golden crests. A single tail from this lizard is worth fifty points.

“Fourth, the hunt commences when Lord Luo releases the signal flare and ends at noon tomorrow. All must return to camp at the established hour.

“Fifth, throughout this is competition, let sportsmanship rein above all, and most of all never fail to enjoy the hunt.”

The official stepped back, and Luo Binghe moved forward. He gestured to a handful of wooden chests resting in a half-circle at the bottom of the hill. “All participants may now begin collecting your swords from the designated stations.”

Luo Binghe took in a deep breath, savoring the scent of pine and the heady rush of competition. He’d organized the event to take his mind off certain things after all. Like the memory of that teacher-disciple duo with their saccharine doting and longing looks. Disgusting.

Why… why did that impostor receive a kind Shizun? Why not Luo Binghe? What did the impostor do that Luo Binghe had not?

His jaw tightened. He took a deep breath. Concentrate on the competition.

Once everyone had received their swords, Luo Binghe lit the signal flare. It shot to the sky and exploded, scattering an angry red powder.

“Begin!”

Luo Binghe swung his sword at the Gemscale-Girded Golden Gargoyle Gecko, aiming for its tail. The blade bounced off the hard-as-diamond scales and the gecko darted off to disappear into the underbrush. He cursed under his breath.

He’d been tracking the creature for hours, ignoring lesser prey. This was his personal challenge, a point of pride. Though skillful hunters had managed to chop off one of its many tails, no one has managed to capture the creature itself.

Hung on his neck, hidden behind his lapels, were two shimmering, gem-encrusted tails and two matching gold crests strung with twine. Qi softly pulsed from the crests, emiting a faint glow.

Unlike other reptiles, the Gemscale-Girded Golden Gargoyle Gecko could instantly regenerate a chopped tail up to nine times. Each time its tail was chopped off, it also lost one of the nine golden crests that crowned its head and ran down its spine. Aside from being elusive, darting off at incredible speeds, the gecko’s unusually hard gemstone scales repelled any blows.

Luo Binghe’s sword had already begun to dull. He would need to sharpen it again soon.

By this time, most competitors would have realized the futility of going after the lizard. Their blades would be rendered useless before they managed to capture a single tail. But Luo Binghe savored the challenge. It pumped his blood, knowing he would prevail where others would have given up.

He continued, letting instincts lead the way. He’d hunted down enough lizard-like creatures in the Abyss that he knew the likely paths they would take to escape. Every now and then, he caught the diamond wink of a scale, and he knew the creature was just up ahead.

Sweat dripped from his brow. He’d been in nonstop motion ever since he’d set off the signal flare. This was good. A difficult task consumed his thoughts, the exhaustion serving to dull the hollow feeling that throbbed in his chest. No room to think about a face that he should have distrusted, should have shunned, yet offered only tenderness—no space for those soft green eyes the color of spring, the lips curved in gentle smile, no space for his wounds being tended to with the utmost care, his pillows being fluffed like he was a doted-on child, no space for qi passed to him all night, cradled in a warm embrace, no space for deft fingers sneaking a braid into his hair—

A streak of diamond and gold shot past him; he swung his sword and narrowly missed the gecko’s glittering tail. With a roar of frustration, he flung his sword to a nearby pine tree, the tip of it burying itself into the trunk.

After he’d taken in several calming breaths and collected his composure, a thought occurred to him.

He’d seen but a flash, but Luo Binghe’s eyes were sharp. The last time Luo Binghe had seen the gecko, it had seven golden crests along its back. They were now down to six.

Someone else was hunting it.

He withdrew the sword from the tree and stalked off.

It took nearly half a shichen before Luo Binghe found the gecko’s trail again. Or rather, his rival’s.

The canopy grew denser. Late afternoon sun filtered through the treetops and cast golden shafts of light on the forest floor.

Pine needles, their tips honed to razor sharpness, carpeted the ground where the gecko had obviously struggled. Though the pine needles wouldn’t have pierced through the creature’s hard scales, a flurry of them would have disoriented it. He would know, having been sent off-kilter by a similar attack from a certain shizun-disciple duo…

A crushing weight squeezed his chest. Shaking his head to clear it, he looked around.

Not far from the carpet of pine needles, he spotted a single chipped gem-like scale laying on the ground, glinting in the low light. Further confirmation that he was on the right track.

He followed the trail. After an incense stick of walking, a voice drifted from the edge of the treeline.

“Fuck Airplane and his horny worldbuilding—”

Dampening his footsteps with qi so as not to make a noise, he stepped closer to the sound and hid behind a tree.

Before him was a small clearing carpeted with tubular flowers, their ends flared like a bell. They were large and grew up to waist height. At the center of the flower field was Princess Aniya, her platinum-blond hair bound in a single long plait. She held a flower by the whorl of green sepals underneath it in her left hand, while her right hand rooted inside the tubular bloom. As her arm moved in up and down motions, she mumbled a series of low curses and words that Luo Binghe couldn’t quite comprehend.

Luo Binghe watched, fascinated. Even after marrying her, he had never seen her so unguarded—her back slouched, sculpted brows furrowed in concentration, her normally immaculate dress rumpled and torn at the hem, wisps of stray hair escaping the confines of her plait. And he would never have imagined the uncouth words that streamed from the normally reserved and refined Princess’ mouth.

Princess Aniya was a conquest of his from the Far Western lands beyond the ocean, an island of rolling green hills and mountain ranges where people spoke a strange, musical language and wore form-fitting clothes that both exposed yet revealed nothing. She was descended from a mystical race—the fae—but also had human ancestry. He had thought they shared a kinship, being half-breeds. He had thought that the connection would help them grow closer.

But Princess Aniya was closed off, her glacial green gaze and platinum hair as cool and distant as the mountain peaks in her homeland. She had never forgiven him for never putting her first in his heart, for making her compete with the other wives for his attention. Luo Binghe had never hidden his harem from her, but she had been confident of her own charms and beauty, of how she commanded the attention and admiration of princes and nobles who traveled the world over to woo her. Little did she know that in the harem of the Emperor of the Three Realms, peerless beauties were as common as dandelions sprouting along the road.

Though they were married, Luo Binghe knew that she kept an ace up her sleeve, and had never completely given herself to him. She had never revealed to him her true name, the fae’s most guarded secret, the knowledge of which would have granted absolute power over her.

Thus, she was simply called Princess Aniya.

“Oh— Oh! Fucking finally!” Princess Aniya said, and her arm movements slowed to a stop. She took out a small glass vial from her pocket and tipped it inside the bell-like flower. When she withdrew her hand, a sticky white liquid coated her palm.

Luo Binghe decided it was time to reveal himself. Fixing a pleasant smile to his face, he stepped away from the tree and called out, “Aniya.”

Princess Aniya whipped her head and jumped back in surprise. “Lord Luo,” she said, and bowed at the waist.

Luo Binghe stepped closer, leaving a trail where he’d parted the blooms as he walked. Though she was at the center of the clearing, Princess Aniya had not left a similar trail, as if she’d plopped straight down from the sky. “My dear wife, care to explain what you were doing with the flower?”

“Oh, this.” She glanced at her wet and sticky palm and then at the flower she had been touching just moments ago. Then her fair face turned a deep crimson, red tinging up to the tips of her pointed ears.

Who would’ve thought that Princess Aniya could be this adorable when embarrassed.

“Well…” Princess Aniya started, taking her handkerchief to wipe the mess on her hand and then cleared her throat. “My issued sword was getting dull, and then I found this field of Honeblossoms. Its nectar is known for its blade sharpening and hardening properties. Works better than any sword oil. So I harvested the nectar myself.”

She turned to point to the flower, and as she shifted, a necklace hidden in her collar slipped out. It was the standard issue necklace of twine, similar to Luo Binghe’s, and strung on it were two gleaming Gemscale-Girded Golden Gargoyle Gecko tails and matching golden crests.

Luo Binghe found his smile growing wider.

“It just so happened that this Lord is also having trouble with a dull blade. Would my dear wife show me how?”

“I could but…” She darted her gaze away and chewed her bottom lip. “This is embarrassing, but promise not to laugh, okay?”

“I promise.” Now Luo Binghe was even more intrigued.

She pointed to a Honeblossom standing between her and Luo Binghe and started explaining. “You see, inside the flower, surrounded by petals, is the spadix. It’s what produces the blade-sharpening nectar” She traced a vertical protrusion along the tubular bloom shaped like a long-necked vase. “The spadix is wrapped by the stigma and style, which need to be peeled back. Try it.”

The stigma was a soft furled knob. Through its opening, Luo Binghe could glean the tip of the spadix, moistened by a bead of clear liquid. He closed his fist around the stigma and gently lowered it. It reminded Luo Binghe of peeling back a foreskin.

“I know it kinda looks like… that.” Princess Aniya said with a nervous laugh. “But, uhhh… it should be okay. We’re all adults here.”

“Like what?” Luo Binghe drawled, smiling oh-so-innocently.

“Like—” she flicked her eyes away, blushing furiously. “Oh, don’t make me say it!”

Luo Binghe laughed, and dropped the subject.

The tip of the spadix came into view, the rest of its length revealed as Luo Binghe’s fist traveled down to the base. It resembled a thin corn cob, with ridged protrusions around its circumference.

“Peel it back all the way down. Yes. Just like that.” She had collected her composure, and her calm voice reminded Luo Binghe of hall masters giving lectures at Qian Cao Peak, only gentler. “Now pump it up and down, squeezing it intermittently. It should gradually begin to soften and then you can extract the nectar.”

Luo Binghe did as instructed, but the spadix remained rigid. “Is this correct?”

“Squeeze tighter. Like this.”

When Luo Binghe’s fist reached the base of the spadix, Princess Aniya surged forward and clamped her own hand around it, directly above Luo Binghe’s. Pressed close, Luo Binghe could smell the warm perfume of her hair, a mixture of light sweat and heather. Together, they slid their hands up, and then down, Princess Aniya squeezing tight until the spadix’s ridges bulged, then releasing her grip. Luo Binghe copied her, a strange but not unpleasant warmth pooling in his gut as they settled on a steady rhythm.

Soon, the head of the spadix swelled, and a sticky white substance spurted from its tip. Princess Aniya whipped out another glass vial. Luo Binhge helped guide the spadix’s tip to the vial’s lip to catch the liquid.

“Easy does it.” Princess Aniya gathered the last of the liquid and put a stopper on the vial. She handed it to Luo Binghe.

“Thank you.” Luo Binghe accepted the vial. “Now what was so embarrassing about that?” He said, feigning innocence.

It seemed impossible, but Princess Aniya’s flushed face turned an even deeper shade of red. “Because to squeeze out the nectar, you’d have to— you’d have to—”

“—Manually stimulate the organ?”

“Y-Yes, exactly.” She nodded her head like a chick pecking at rice. “The flower needs to be touched and coaxed before it yields its sweet nectar.”

“Nectar that can sharpen the stiffest sword.” He grinned. “My dear wife, if you were wanting to seduce this lord, you could have just asked. I’m not difficult to convince.”

Princess Aniya’s jaw dropped. Luo Binghe had never seen such a flabbergasted expression on the normally cool and aloof princess. Like the permafrost melting in the sun, exposing what what had long been buried beneath. He found that he liked it very much.

She was speechless for a moment. Then she said, “We’re in the middle of a competition!” She turned away and stormed off, her long platinum braid swaying with the motion.

This time, Luo Binghe couldn’t help the guffaw that escaped his throat. Since when did a competition prevent him from bedding maidens? He’d lost his virginity during the Immortal Alliance Conference. He ran after her, hoping to appease. “I jest, I jest…” She was so much fun to rile up. “You still haven’t shown me how to use the nectar to sharpen my sword.”

Mercifully, she stopped and turned around. “If Lord Luo wishes it, I will show him.”

The next time Luo Binghe aimed his sword at the gecko’s gem-encrusted tail, it sliced right off. The gecko darted away like lightning, leaving a single golden crest the size of a thumb in its wake.

He picked up the sparkling tail and inspected it. The cut was very clean. Before they went their separate ways, Princess Aniya had taught him how to coat the blade with the Honeblossom’s nectar and whip the sword in controlled motions to hone the edge. Luo Binghe had his doubts but he did as instructed and the result was a blade as sharp and sturdy as any spiritual sword.

He’d thanked Princess Aniya and tested his sword on a nearby tree. The blade chopped through the trunk and felled the tree in a single smooth stroke. He held up the blade, inspecting it in the light, amazed that a nondescript flower could have that effect. How had she known about it?

But Princess Aniya only shook her head and said that she had read about it in a terrible book she regretted reading, and mumbled a few other complaints that Luo Binghe didn’t quite catch.

Luo Binghe was about to say that the book couldn’t have been so terrible if she read all of it, but when he turned, she had already walked off to the treeline. She waved goodbye and disappeared into the forest.

Luo Binghe threaded the Gemscale-Girded Golden Gargoyle Gecko’s tail and golden crest through his necklace and continued the hunt. Four more tails and golden crests to go.

The next time he encountered the gecko, it only had three crests left. It seemed he and Princess Aniya were once again evenly matched. Adrenaline pumped through his veins. He hadn’t been this thrilled in a competition for a long time.

He chopped off a glittering tail before the Gemscale-Girded Golden Gargoyle Gecko skittered away. Two last crests to go.

Luo Binghe spotted the reptile hiding among the smooth white stones in a shallow stream, an overhanging rock above it. He sprinted but before he could reach it, a flurry of deep blue silk swooped down from above. A blade flashed and struck the water. The water splashed, droplets sparkling like a thousand glittering diamonds as the Gemscale-Girded Golden Gargoyle Gecko leapt away and fled into a hole in the rock. Princess Aniya stood ankle-deep in in the shallows, water darkening her boots and the hem of her skirt. In her hand was a scintillating tail.

“Well-done, Aniya.”

“Lord Luo.” She bowed. “We meet again.”

“It’s fate.” Luo Binghe enjoyed seeing her duck her head, the pointed tips of her ears twitching and turning pink.

“Is Lord Luo hunting the Gemscale-Girded Golden Gargoyle Gecko as well?”

“Indeed. It’s down to its last crest.”

“And final tail.”

Luo Binghe sing-songed, “Oh dear. It seems Aniya is my rival.” He fished out the necklace from his collar and held up the string of glittering tails and golden crests—all four pairs, mirroring Princess Aniya’s.

Her eyes widened as she stared at the necklace. But in the next moment, her gaze hardened into a stiff determination. “It’s a race, then. One I plan to win.” She exited the water and turned left, in the opposite direction where they last saw the Gemscale-Girded Golden Gargoyle Gecko.

Luo Binghe followed her. He wondered if he was on the right track, or if Princess Aniya intended a feint to put him off-course. The underbrush pulled at their robes and dead leaves crackled underneath their boots. As Princess Aniya ran, her clothes clung to her body, revealing the outline of a shapely bottom. Luo Binghe thrilled at the chase, his blood singing in his ears. He forged ahead, eyes never leaving Princess Aniya’s elegant form, a hunter fixed upon his prey. For a moment or two, he completely forgot about the gecko’s existence.

And then, from the thick canopy overhead, they caught a flash of diamond and gold.

The trees started thinning. They ran like twin arrows shot from the same bow, separated but aligned, keeping the same pace. And then, when the canopy had cleared enough to afford a clear view, they caught sight of an enormous cypress tree looming overhead.

Its giant roots rose above the treetops, the trunk thick as a several large houses. It must have been over a thousand years old—a living, rough-hewn column that reached the heavens. Its very presence commanded awe and attention, giving subtle weight to the air. In Luo Binghe’s two hundred years of life, he had never seen a more majestic pillar.

The Gemscale-Girded Golden Gargoyle Gecko shot away from the treeline. The ground was barren underneath the towering tree’s canopy save for dried leaves and loose rocks. Between its giant, gnarly roots loomed a dark opening. The gecko scurried towards it and disappeared into its depths.

Luo Binghe and Princess Aniya raced after it. The opening was just big enough for a person to wedge in and they entered single-file, Luo Binghe leading the way. The light cut off. Princess Aniya took out a night pearl and a damp, moss-covered passage came into view. The path wound like a serpent, and they could just make out the shapes of tree roots and tangled vines that made up the walls and low ceiling. Turning a corner, they caught a glimmer ahead.

As they rushed toward it, the night pearl’s light reaching farther into the path, the glimmer shone brighter and brighter. When they reached the end of the passage, Princess Aniya let out a soft gasp.

The passage opened into a spacious cavern covered floor to ceiling with thousands of glittering jewels. Diamonds and quartz crystals and sapphires jutted out of the tree bark, punctuated every now and then by emeralds and rubies as large as a chicken eggs. Glinting and shimmering, refracting the night pearl’s faint glow a thousand times until the cavern shone as bright as day.

So this was the Gemscale-Girded Golden Gargoyle Gecko’s lair. It would be nearly impossible to spot the creature, perfectly camouflaged as it was in its jewel-covered habitat. Luo Binghe nearly crossed his eyes trying to visually map the cavern’s layout, taking in the single pear tree at the center, its green leaves and brown trunk incongruous amongst the sparkling stones and candescent crystals.

Princess Aniya took a tentative step toward the crystalline ground. Luo Binghe expected a crunch or at the very least, a scrape from her boot. But no sound came except her soft footfalls. “Oh!” She exclaimed, looking at her feet. “These aren’t crystals. Or at least, not your regular crystal.” She bent, picked up a shimmering piece like a mirror shard, and said, “They’re Quartzheart Bellflowers!”

Luo Binghe drew near. Upon closer inspection, the shard was indeed a five-petaled flower. He touched it with the tip of his finger—the thin petals were pliant, soft yet smooth and cold as the finest crystal. They covered the entire floor. A kaleidoscope of flowers.

Princess Aniya walked forward, careful not to crush the Quartzheart Bellflowers, until she reached the other side of the cavern. She gazed up and ran her fingers against the bumpy, gem-encrusted walls. “There must be thousands—no, millions of gems here,” she said, voice tinged with awe. “And it’s a gecko’s home. So many precious jewels gathered in one place, worth billions, growing on the walls like common mushrooms—” She stopped in front of a pear-shaped diamond, jaw dropping open. “Is that the Great Star of Africa?! The fuck is it doing here?”

Before Luo Binghe could ask her to clarify, she whipped around, skirts billowing, face practically glowing with delight. “Isn’t it amazing? I never could have imagined anything like it.” She pointed to the pear tree. “How could it grow inside this trunk without access to water or sunlight? Why a pear?” She looked at the tree, heavy with fruit, with a pensive expression. “I remember my elder brother used to keep a pet gecko, and cut pears were its favorite treats. Do you suppose that the cavern reflects the heart of its inhabitant? The gecko surrounding itself with its favorite things?” She turned towards Luo Binghe. “What does Lord Luo think?”

Luo Binghe had been watching her the entire time. With her long platinum hair, pearly white skin, and emerald green eyes, she gleamed as brightly as any precious jewel. “Beautiful,” he said.

Her face brightened, and it was such an open expression, full of unbridled joy, that it took Luo Binghe’s breath away. “Isn’t it? I’m so glad we stumbled upon it!”

A smile curled on Luo Binghe’s lips. Just as he took a step forward, gold flashed from the corner of his eye.

Reflex took over. He withdrew his sword with a sharp hiss and he turned sharply to the left. In three quick strides, he bore down on the Gemscale-Girded Golden Gargoyle Gecko laying camouflaged on a sapphire and ruby-encrusted rock.

He swung. Just as the blade was about to connect to the gecko’s tail, Princess Aniya screamed “Stop!” and flung herself over the creature.

It was only thanks to Luo Binghe’s superior reaction time that he managed to stop his sword before it sliced off her neck. But the attack wasn’t entirely without casualty. The blade had chopped off Princess Aniya’s braid, right on her nape. The long platinum plait slid to the floor with a soft plop.

Luo Binghe’s heart leapt to his throat. He quickly sheathed his sword, crouched, and touched her shoulder. “Aniya, Wife, are you all right?”

She blinked and nodded. Her arms were clutched to her chest, as if hiding something. The remains of her braid unraveled. With her now shoulder-length hair, lightly flushed cheeks, and green eyes wide with shock, she looked like an entirely different person. Warmer, sweeter, and more innocent somehow. Even with such short hair, she was breathtaking. A strange but not-unpleasant feeling trickled into Luo Binghe’s gut.

“Why did you stop me?” Luo Binghe asked.

“I will hand over to Lord Luo the Gemscale-Girded Golden Gargoyle Gecko tails I’ve harvested. But please, spare him.” She withdrew her arms from her chest to reveal what she was hiding—the glittering gecko, cowering in her grip.

Luo Binghe raised a brow. “This Lord was only planning to chop off its tail then let it go. It will live.”

“For now, yes.” Princess Aniya said. “But the gecko is down to its final golden crest. Did you know?” She caressed its sparkling, scaly head. “This little guy could regenerate eight tails in rapid succession. Each time it loses a tail, a golden crest falls off. But once it loses its ninth and final crest, it loses the ability to regenerate altogether.”

“So it’s as if the gecko has used up its remaining life force?”

Princess Aniya nodded. “Yes, exactly. But this little creature is very resilient. As long as it has a single crest remaining, it can regenerate new crests, and new tails as well. But regenerating all eight crests take years. During that time, the Gemscale-Girded Golden Gargoyle Gecko is significantly weakened and is no stronger than a common house gecko.”

“In that case, even if we spare the gecko now, what’s stopping a hunter from capturing it and chopping off its tail? It would be quite easy to catch.”

“Ah, well, about that…” Princess Aniya lowered her gaze, and red bloomed on her cheeks. She cleared her throat and clutched the gecko closer to her bosom. “I was hoping to bring it back with me to the palace and care for it until it grows back its crests. If Lord Luo grants me permission of course.”

Luo Binghe was stunned. Since when did the cold fae princess have a soft spot for weak animals? A cold-blooded reptile, no less.

“If that’s what Aniya desires, I see no reason to refuse.” The gecko was harmless enough, and would probably make an impression with the palace residents.

“Thank you so much!” Her face brightened, her eyes going soft around the edges, and Luo Binghe found himself drawn into those emerald pools, like a man lost in the desert at last discovering an oasis.

Princess Aniya pulled out a cage from her qiankun pouch and slipped the gecko inside it. The creature immediately settled without complaint.

“You brought a cage with you?” Luo Binghe said.

Princess Aniya looked at him sheepishly. “My target was the Gemscale-Girded Golden Gargoyle Gecko from the start. But it needed to be weakened first by chopping off its tails and having it drop its golden crests. It’s too flighty otherwise. I doubt we would have been able to penetrate its lair if it had its full power.”

With the creature secure in its cage, they both made their way out of the cavern. They came out to a sky tinged red and orange, the last rays of the sun fading away. A cool breeze picked up and stirred the dry leaves beneath their feet.

She pulled her necklace with the four shining gecko tails and matching golden crests over her head and handed it to Luo Binghe. “Here are the tails, as promised. I’ll even hand over the gecko as long as it’s unharmed. We just need to bring a tail, right? There’s no rule prohibiting it from being attached to a living lizard.”

“Thanking Princess Aniya for her kind consideration, but this Lord cannot in good conscience accept,” he replied.

Princess Aniya’s face fell. “Is it not to your satisfaction? It wasn’t fair for me to claim the gecko when Lord Luo was the first reach it.”

Luo Binghe flashed her his signature grin, the one that had made hundreds of soft-bosomed maidens weak at the knees. “If it bothers Aniya that much, there is another way to satisfy me.”

“This lowly subject will do anything to repay her debt.”

“Wife.”

“Huh?” Her forehead creased.

“Wife. You should call yourself my wife.” She was a subject, but she was first and foremost Luo Binghe’s wife. How had Princess Aniya referred to herself before? He didn’t remember.

Princess Aniya’s gaze lowered and two spots of pink dotted her cheeks. “Then this wife shall be of service to Lord Luo.”

“Well then…” he looked around and found a nearby boulder with a mostly flat surface that could double as a seat. He sat on it and beckoned her. “Come, my dear wife. And set the gecko down for a moment, will you?”

She obeyed and cautiously stepped toward him.

“Now sit on my lap.”

Even in the low light, he could see her face turn a violent shade of red, her pointed ears twitching. Her knees bumped against Luo Binghe’s. She stared at his lap as if it were the most vexing puzzle in the universe.

Luo Binghe suppressed a chuckle. He reached for her arm and pulled her close so that she flopped onto his lap to straddle him, her head over his shoulder. His arms encircled her tiny waist. “There’s no need to be so shy,” Luo Binghe crooned against her ear. “Aren’t you always the first to clamber onto this Lord’s lap whenever he calls you for a round of dual cultivation with his other wives?”

He felt her body tense. Prideful Princess Aniya, who had no qualms asserting her dominance even among the senior wives, even relying on trickery and subterfuge to metaphorically and physically elbow her way into Luo Binghe’s bed at every opportunity. There was a cold, calculated grace to her methods that Luo Binghe couldn’t find it in himself scold her, despite complaints from Sha Hualing and Qiu Haitang. Teasing her had been fun so far. But faced with her obvious trepidation, he couldn’t bring himself to enjoy the moment.

“Darling Aniya, is there something wrong? You haven’t been yourself today.”

She ducked her head, the fall of her hair shielding her eyes. “I-I’m fine.”

Luo Binghe cupped her face and tipped her chin up. “Don’t hide your lovely face. There’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

Luo Binghe brushed a stray lock of hair from her eye. “Is it your sickness? It hasn’t been long since you recovered.” He’d heard she was in a delirium, bedridden for five days while he was away on a military campaign. It had taken several court physicians to finally heal her.

“About that…” she said, her eyes darting away. “I’m okay now. Just… tired, I guess?”

“But surely not too tired to reward your husband with a kiss?” His fingers trailed down her side. “Or would that be asking too much?”

Her eyes went wide and her throat bobbed as she swallowed. “It wouldn’t be. I’m your wife after all. Wives kiss their husbands. It’s their duty.” She said it as if she was reminding herself. “Perfectly normal. Perfectly natural.” Then, very slowly, she lowered her head and brought her mouth toward Luo Binghe’s.

Luo Binghe surged up to meet her lips. She let out a small, shocked sigh that shot like an arrow straight to Luo Binghe’s groin. As he nibbled on her lip and his tongue probed and prodded within her mouth, she began to pant faintly. When she tried to move her head away, Luo Binghe pulled her back and kissed her even more deeply.

For some reason, an exhilarating sense of deja-vu came over Luo Binghe. A distant memory stirred within him of a similar kiss.

Princess Aniya returned the kiss, albeit clumsily. It was as if in the time between between her illness and now, she had forgotten how. Her eyes squeezed shut, her forehead creasing in a frown. But she soldiered on and met Luo Binghe’s tongue with slow, tentative probings of her own.

Luo Binghe found that he enjoyed the kiss despite the awkwardness. It was almost as if he were kissing a virginal princess for the first time.

He finally withdrew his lips and leaned back, the better to see her face. The last rays of sunset shone behind her, dyeing her fair hair until it glowed a gold-orange hue. It should have been disconcerting, seeing her with hair so short, but for some reason it only added to her otherworldly loveliness. She stared back at Luo Binghe with pupils blown wide, chest heaving in short pants, her kiss-crushed mouth red and slightly parted in bewilderment.

Birds cawed in the distance and the sun dipped over the horizon, tinting the forest purple gray. Despite the drop in temperature, a wave of simmering heat washed over Luo Binghe, and it was like there was a horde of butterflies beating against his chest, threatening to break free. Suddenly, he was acutely aware of Princess Aniya’s warmth, her round buttocks pressing down into his lap, her hand now clutching at the fabric over his chest, the rise and fall of her breasts. When he tried to speak, it was as if all speech had fled from him, his tongue tied to the roof of his mouth.

All from a simple kiss.

When was the last time he’d felt this way?

“Aniya—” he finally managed to speak, throat dry.

She didn’t speak, her breath coming out in short pants, eyes unfocused, color high in her cheeks. Her fist tightened into the fabric of Luo Binghe’s robe. Then she shifted her gaze and her eyes widened. Suddenly, Luo Binghe was roughly pushed to the side, a shout of “Look out!” ringing in his ears.

Luo Binghe crashed to the forest floor, dead leaves crackling and flying all around him. He turned and looked up just in time to see long, tentacle-like vines burst from behind the boulder they had been sitting on and wrap around Princes Aniya’s waist. Adrenaline surged within him and he leapt up. But before he could reach her, the vines snapped back and snatched Princess Aniya away.

Princess Aniya’s screams pierced the forest as she was dragged off, her feet leaving deep gouges on the ground. Luo Binghe ran after her.

The vines were quick. They whipped around a bend, Luo Binghe in hot pursuit, and he found himself once again beyond the treeline, at the clearing where the ancient cypress stood. The vines came from within the base of the tree, in the space between its thick roots, the same opening he and Princess Aniya entered before. The tree swallowed Princess Aniya. Luo Binghe tried to follow but when he reached the gaping maw, hundreds of thick vines rapidly criss-crossed to form an impenetrable wall. In a blink, the entrance was sealed.

He took out his sword and hacked at the vines. “Aniya, Wife, this Lord is coming to rescue you,” he called out. But even as he chopped off the woody appendages, more came to take their place. He kept slashing away. “Aniya, can you hear me? Answer me, Aniya!”

No one replied back, not even a scream.

He gritted his teeth. It had all happened so quick. He’d been the vines’ target. He’d be the one trapped inside the tree now if Princess Aniya hadn’t pushed him away.

She’d saved him. When had anyone ever saved Luo Binghe?

He hacked on.

It took nearly a shichen before Luo Binghe finally managed to cleave his way through. The woody vines were harder than normal and ate up his blade. Only his liberal use of the Honeblossom’s nectar allowed him to make any headway. By the time the last vine was sliced away, he had used every last drop of it.

Night had descended and he was working in dim light, only the pale glow of the night pearl lighting his way. He’d called out Aniya’s name again and again but no reply ever came. He’d even called on his blood mites, trying to sense Aniya’s location and how she was faring. Maybe there was something inside the cavern that was interfering with the blood mites as the information that came back to him was a confusing jumble. First, Aniya seemed to be somewhere at the cavern’s center, and then as time went by the blood mites’ movements expanded outward. Could it be that her blood had spilled? But no, the pattern was too bizarre and besides, the blood mites would have alerted him had she come to grave bodily harm.

Luo Binghe took a deep, steadying breath. He had never lost a wife, never let a maiden down. This shouldn’t be any different from any challenge he’d faced before.

But as time went by, the blood mites’ activity spread out farther and farther, until they thinned out enough that Luo Binghe could no longer sense them. Uncertainty grew in his gut. Something wasn’t right.

Now, as he walked the winding passage finally clear of vines, his uncertainty only grew. The path was different from the one he and Princess Aniya had previously come through. He made his way down long, twisted corridors, taking hairpin turns and squeezing through narrow gaps at a half-crawl. Sweat coated his palms and his pulse pounded in his ears.

Eventually, he reached the end. But this time, at the heart of the tree, there was no trace of glittering light. Only darkness. And just as he stepped into the hollow, yawning black, the night pearl’s light cut off.

He cursed under his breath and trudged on in the pitch black, his sword firm in his grip.

“Aniya, darling? Are you there? Please, answer me.”

Silence. Luo Binghe cautiously walked on, the only sound the distant trickle of water somewhere overhead and the whisper of his boots against a carpet of soft moss. He could feel large shapes looming in the dark around him, just out of sight.

And then, a few paces to his left, something lit up.

Luo Binghe’s pulse jumped and he stepped toward it. Sprouting from the wall, at eye level, was a small, flat, rectangular object emitting a harsh, otherwordly glow. It was about the size of his palm and didn’t look like anything he had ever seen before. Attached to a thick vine like a flower, its surface was an impossibly smooth and clear pane of glass. As Luo Binghe watched, it began to flicker.

The rectangular pane’s light cut off, but only for the space of a heartbeat. And then, when it flared to life once again, dozens of others lit up, too. All along the walls and ceiling, the same palm-sized, angular torches hung from vines and illuminated the cavern. For the first time, he could get a sense of the cavern’s interior.

It looked nothing like it previously did. There was no sparkle of diamonds, no glimmer of gold, no glittering crystals to refract the light. Gone was the pear tree and the carpet of Quartzheart Bellflowers; in their place soft green moss covered the cavern floor.

The interior now looked like a tree hollow, dark moss coating its irregular, undulating walls of bark, the ceiling teeming with thick dangling vines. The vines slithered across the bumpy surfaces and hid between crevices. From many of them sprung glowing panes like rectangular flowers. But not all vines were the same. Some vines with pink stems bore unopened buds, white and long and pod-like. On one side of the wall beside these pod-like flowers, Luo Binghe could make out a shelf upon which sat the spines of several books.

The angular panes of light cut off, plunging the cavern in darkness. And when they lit up once more, a familiar symbol flared to life on their surface.

Luo Binghe’s breath caught, the hair on his nape standing on end. Reflected on dozens of smooth glass planes was the mark of sin—Luo Binghe’s heavenly demon sigil.

As far as he knew, he was the last of the heavenly demons. It was a sacred mark, reserved only for the emperor. Who could have the audacity to display the sigil—Luo Binghe’s mark—so casually?

But everything in here wasn’t what it seemed.

“Aniya? Where are you? Speak to me.” His voice echoed in the cavern.

The light flickered once again. Silence.

He walked towards the shelf which seemed to half-growing, half-carved into the wood. Tomes bound in various shades of leather lined it. On the spine of one such volume was written: Zhongdian Literature Forums: Proud Immortal Demon Way. Curious, he pulled it out. It tore away from the shelf with a pop, as though plucking a leaf. He opened the dark red cover and flipped through the pages.

He almost dropped the book in shock.

On each page, in strange, nearly illegible writing, several writers commented on different stages of Luo Binghe’s life as if they were an audience to a play. They had curious pseudonyms—Ten Years of Reading Sharpens One Sword, Hoeing Wheat is my Noontime Occupation, Cang Qiong Mountain Stair-Cleaning Manager, Qingge’s Blood Brother, Warrior’s Hammer.

Complaints poured out about Luo Binghe’s conquests, calling them ‘mindless.’ They complained about his dubious morality, his insatiable sexual appetite. They made lewd comments about Luo Binghe’s wives, hurled insults on Luo Binghe’s methods. They talked about his suffering before his rise as an emperor and his ruthlessness with his enemies as if it were some moral failing. Someone even complained about his late washerwoman mother and claimed that by adopting Luo Binghe herself instead of sending him to a wealthy family, she had set him up to fail. Luo Binghe gritted his teeth, the book’s spine creaking and nearly breaking in two as he fought to subdue his rising temper. As if these people understood Luo Binghe’s mother, or knew what it was to walk in his shoes.

Except one.

For every criticism directed toward Luo Binghe, a certain Peerless Cucumber came to defend him.

Peerless Cucumber wasn’t impressed with Luo Binghe’s wives either, save for Liu Mingyan, but was quick to defend Luo Binghe’s honor without fail. His diatribes spanned several pages, tearing down every criticism of Luo Binghe. He gave the person who complained about Luo Binghe’s mother such a thorough tongue-lashing that they never resurfaced again. Even when jeers and insults were directed toward him, he never stopped or wavered in his tireless defense. If anything, his essays grew longer, his arguments more elaborate.

For Peerless Cucumber, Luo Binghe could do no wrong.

It’s true love for Cucumber-bro, another detractor had written, and Luo Binghe felt his stomach flutter.

A soft cry snapped Luo Binghe from his thoughts; the book dropped from his hands with a thud. “Aniya? Is that you? Please, answer.” He pulled away from the bookshelf.

More soft cries echoed through the cavern, and the walls shifted and rippled as if breathing. Luo Binghe continued walking, following the countour of the wall. Water dripped from the walls and trickled down the vines. A drop landed over Luo Binghe’s lip. He licked it, and tasted salt.

“Aniya?” he called out again. She was somewhere here, he was sure of it.

Finally, a reply. “Lord Luo, I-I’m alive. I’m okay.” Her voice seemed to come from everywhere all at once, bouncing and refracting through the cavern, splintering into a dozen echoes.

Luo Binghe’s jaw clenched. “Where are you now? This husband will come to rescue you.”

“…..”

“Aniya? What’s the matter?”

“Lord Luo may go ahead without me.”

“What are you talking about? Are you hurt?”

“I-I’m not hurt.”

“Then what’s the matter? Are you being threatened?” It almost sounded like she didn’t want to be rescued. He picked up the pace, trying to find the source of her voice. A thick tangle of vines blocked his way. He took out his sword and chopped it off.

Princess Aniya’s pained cry rang through the cavern. The vines recoiled, leaving the chopped appendages on the floor.

Luo Binghe’s pulse leapt. “Aniya! Just tell me where you are!”

More salt water trickled down the walls.

“It’s impossible,” Princess Aniya said between sobs.

Luo Binghe had never encountered the impossible. Even in the most dire circumstances, he had always found a way through. “We’ll find a way,” he said, trying to be soothing. “But first, you have to tell me where you are.”

“Y-You wouldn’t like it,” Princess Aniya said. Her sniffles echoed off the walls.

She wasn’t making sense. None of it did. But he’d had enough experience coaxing reticent maidens and soothing them enough to let their guard down and allow him to help them.

“I won’t judge, or be mad. This husband only wants to help. Now could you tell me where you are?”

Another sniffle. Then she said, “I’m right here.”

Luo Binghe looked around. The same cavern encompassed him, devoid of human life. Only the steady drip of water broke the silence.

“I can’t find you,” he said. “Can you give a sign?”

There was a soft rustle. Vines crept down from the walls and snaked across the floor. A single vine slithered beneath his feet and caressed the tip of his boot.

“Aniya?” he called out again.

“I’m here. I’m touching your boot.”

Luo Binghe looked at his feet. Curled around the tip of his boot was a vine. It was thin, not much thicker than a piece of string, and had a pink stem flush with tiny leaves. It looked strangely cute.

A mixture of alarm, wonder, and exhilaration bloomed in his chest.

He crouched and caressed the vine’s glossy leaves with the tip of his finger. “Aniya? Is it really you? Are you in the vine?”

Princess Aniya let out a shuddering sigh, and it seemed as though the entire cavern sighed with her, the dangling vines swaying, the damp walls undulating. “Yes. Or rather, I am the vine. I’ve been absorbed by this ancient cypress. From what I’ve gathered, it was in symbiosis with the Gemscale-Girded Golden Gargoyle Gecko whose rich qi kept the tree nourished. In return, the gecko received a safe and secure home. But since we’ve captured the gecko and all of its qi-rich golden crests had fallen off, the ancient cypress needed a new host.” Another sigh. “Which is me.”

“Where is your physical body?” There must be a way to pull her free while severing the connection between her and tree.

“It’s gone. Dissolved. At least it didn’t hurt when it happened.”

“Dissolved? How are you speaking to this lord now?”

“For all intents and purposes, the tree—including everything in it—and I are now one.”

Luo Binghe suddenly became acutely aware of his surroundings—the soft moss, the dozens of small glowing panels, the bumpy, moss-covered walls, the vines hanging from ceiling. A pleasant shiver ran up his spine. “What do you see? How do you see me?”

“Hmmm… It’s hard to exlain. It’s like I sense everything inside this cavern, and even what’s outside. I see you from multiple angles, but I also feel the weight of your boots against the moss. I sense the displacement of the air whenever you move, I can hear your breathing, even sense your body temperature. Almost like… you’re inside me, somehow.”

Luo Binghe stood and paused for a moment to take in this information. It wasn’t the first time he’d had a wife kidnapped and turned into an unwilling host by some creature, but he had never encountered a situation where the wife and parasite had merged so completely. He caressed his chin in thought.

“Aniya, let’s try something to take you out of the tree.”

“It’s impossible. I told you I’m fused to it. I can’t even feel my arms, or hands, or my face. They’re… gone.” The cavern shuddered once again. If she were back in her half-human, half-fae body, Luo Binghe could imagine her closing her eyes and massaging her temples in frustration, like when she and the Little Palace Mistress just had another spat. “Just my fucking luck. Finally free to explore the world, except now I’m stuck as a damned tree.”

“I’m not leaving you here.”

“Lord Luo, I’m sure the others would understand if you left. Just remember to bring me new reading material every now and then. I foresee it could get boring here.”

“We haven’t even tried yet. Why are you giving up so quickly?”

“Can’t you see? It’s useless!” Vines shook overhead. She sounded on the verge of tears.

He paced once more around the cavern, inspecting every nook and crevice, searching for any clue. To distract her from her misery, he said, “Aniya, tell me. When you get out of here, where would you like to go?”

“Does it matter? I’m not getting out of here.”

“It matters. Because this husband promises to take you there.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”

“Are you doubting this Lord?”

There was a pause, as if Princess Aniya was weighing her words. Finally, she answered, “Well, I suppose I would like to visit the Tower of Canonical Records. There’s a book there I want to read.”

Luo Binghe senses pricked on high alert. This was not a request he’d expected. “Oh? What book is that?”

“In a secret section of the library is the Collection of Unwritten Books. It contains the extra lore Cannonball Hurtling Towards the Stratosphere dreamed of but never put to paper.”

“Ah, yes. If it’s the Tower of Canonical Records, it should be there.” He wondered how Princess Aniya knew of the secret library. He had once been granted access to it. All visitors were required to have their names inscribed on the plaque and to swear to absolutely secrecy. Aside from a single sage from a thousand years ago, Luo Binghe’s was the only other name engraved there. “We shall visit the Tower of Canonical Records, then. But why not something more scenic? Like the Frozen Lotus Abyss.” He’d only taken a handful of his wives there, and he knew there was a competition amongst them over who would go next.

“The bottomless ice chasm blooming with frost lotuses would be pretty, I guess, but books are better.” She heaved out another sigh; the cavern trembled and a tome fell from the bookshelf. “Not that I’ll ever manage to go there when I’m stuck here. For life.”

“Aniya has so little faith in this Lord,” he said, hurt tinging his voice.

“I didn’t mean—” She sounded panicked.

“When have I ever failed?”

“…Luo Binghe always prevails. He is the protagonist.”

“Exactly.” He didn’t understand what she was babbling about, but he played along. For his idea to work, he needed her cooperation. “Just leave the problem-solving to this Lord. Aniya only needs to follow.” He walked to the nearest vine—a slender stalk bordered by succulent leaves, and lightly ran his fingers over the pink stem in a soothing motion.

“That tickles,” Princess Aniya giggled. The vine coiled around Luo Binghe’s wrist, its leaves fluttering. “So, what’s the plan?”

He let his face break into a wide grin, knowing that Aniya would see his expression. Still caressing the stalk, he said, “There has always been one method that works without fail.”

For several moments, the cavern halted to a standstill. Even the sounds of dripping water stopped. Luo Binghe imagined that if he could see Princess Aniya’s face, it would be flabbergasted, eyes as big as saucers and mouth hanging open.

“Y-You can’t be serious!” she sputtered.

“If by ‘serious,’ Aniya means dual cultivation, then yes.”

She groaned. “How would you even begin to fuck a tree…” Luo Binghe bit his lip to suppress a laugh, though his shoulders shook from mirth. Then she said, “Besides, I’m hideous.”

The laughter died on Luo Binghe’s lips. “Aniya is beautiful as she is now.”

Leaves rustled. “Smooth talker. You say that to everyone…” But she didn’t sound upset. “Well, even if dual cultivation was effective, how would that work? I’m a tree.”

“Well, let’s find out then.” He let his gaze wander once more around his surroundings, appreciating the view as if seeing it for the first time. He was, he realized, looking at Princess Aniya herself—the shape of her, her undulating waves of whorled bark, her many hanging vines with their pod-like buds and strangely lit panels, her lone bookshelf. “We can explore together.”

He knelt on the carpet of moss and buried his hands in the softness of it, his fingers weaving through the small, elongated leaves. Back and forth, back and forth. He clutched at the moss with his fists in a gently squeezing motion, reveling in the spindly texture. The moss broke out into a wave, as if the wind were blowing over it.

“W-What are you doing?” Princess Aniya said, sounding breathless.

“Touching you.”

Next, Luo Binghe stood and drummed his fingers over the damp, moss-covered walls. Water trickled from above, coating his hands. He placed his wet palms flat on the bumpy wood and rubbed, as if he were smearing cream on a lover’s back. His fingernail snagged on a small, hard protrusion and he scratched at it.

“O-Oh! That feels nice. Like scratching an itch,” Princess Aniya sighed.

Well, Luo Binghe wanted to scratch more than an itch. He found a hollow in the trunk and dipped his hand inside. It was luxuriously soft, cool fluffy bits of loose moss cushioning his palm and passing through his fingers. He curled his hand and squeezed.

A sharp gasp echoed in the cavern. Smiling, Luo Binghe found another nearby hollow to dip his hand in and did the same, imagining he were fondling a woman’s breasts. The more he massaged, the wetter the moss became.

“How does it feel?” he asked.

“I— Oh. I don’t know. But it’s not bad.” The liquid dripping down the walls turned slick and viscous.

Not bad? Luo Binghe took that as a challenge. He directed his attention to a thick tangle of vines and leaves, with their outcropping of pods. He buried his face in them, breathing deep. The cool fresh scent of plants and herbs combined with something deeper, sweeter, and darker filled his lungs.

He rubbed his face against the soft, succulent leaves and let his lips catch on the pinkish stems, mouthing at them. Warmth pooled low in his belly.

“Ah! That really tickles,” came Princess Aniya’s voice. The vines began to tremble, like butterfly kisses against Luo Binghe’s lips. “I— oh— I don’t know.”

“Aniya. Wife. Just relax and let this husband lead the way.” He gave a nearby vine another kiss and then traced his tongue over a thick vein-like protrusion along its length. The trembling of the leaves intensified. Pleasure shivered down Luo Binghe’s spine.

Princess Aniya didn’t reply, but Luo Binghe didn’t need confirmation. He knew he was on the right track.

He pushed one of the rectangular panes aside so it wouldn’t dig into his cheek and grasped one of the long pod-like buds, gently squeezing it. “Aniya, what is this? Can you open the bud?”

“I don’t know. But I suppose we could find out,” she said, breathless. There was a shimmer and shifting of vines and leaves. Then, petal by petal, the bud unfurled. When it was fully in bloom, it somewhat resembled the Honeblossom, but with soft white petals and a dusting of pink at the center. At its base sprung the short stub of a spadix. It was pink speckled with yellow, and dotted with fine wavy ridges along the shaft.

Luo Binghe traced a finger over the wavy ridges. The way they fluttered and yielded under his fingertips filled him with wonder.

Princess Aniya let out a startled cry. “Oh! That—” The spadix expanded and lengthened; Luo Binghe knew he had struck gold. In his groin, the simmering warmth intensified.

Very carefully, he grasped the tip of the spadix with his fist and rubbed its fine wavy ridges. Up and down, in slow motions. The spadix stiffened and clear nectar beaded on its tip. He rubbed some more, keeping a gentle rhythm. The sticky nectar smeared all over the shaft, the liquid permeating the wavy ridges. A sweet and musky scent filled the cavern. Luo Binghe’s mouth watered.

The vines slithered around him, wrapping around his calves. Leaves quivered.

Luo Binghe brought his fist closer to the base of the spadix, which had now swelled to the size of a fat corn cob. Then, in squeezing motions, he pumped it from the root all the way to the tip. More viscous nectar dripped from the tip. Compelled, Luo Binghe licked it. It tasted sweet.

Princess Aniya moaned. “Fuck, that feel so good. This can’t be right. This.. Luo Binghe can’t possibly—”

“It’s all right to feel good,” Luo Binghe said, and continued pumping. “Just… feel it.”

“B-But what about you?”

He smiled and gave the spadix another lick, flattening his tongue. More sweet, sticky nectar bloomed on his tongue, the scent and taste intoxicating. The spadix grew in size. “This Lord wouldn’t mind his wife touching him either. You can do that for me, right?”

Another groan. Princess Aniya didn’t reply, but the vines once more shifted around him, this time a thick woody vine wrapping around his waist. He was lifted in the air while slender vines slithered up his calves and methodically unlaced his boots. The vines continued creeping upward, past his thighs, until they reached his belt and unbuckled it. It was as if hundreds of fine slender hands were caressing him and disrobing him all at once. The vines trailed and coiled their way into the waistband of his trousers and the collar of his robes. With a tug, and a whoosh, Luo Binghe’s boots and robes fell to the ground in a soft clatter.

When he looked down, his own cock was red and turgid, precum glistening at the tip. A slender vine, no thicker than a cord of silk, curled around the length of it.

Above him, more of the white buds opened, their spadixes half-engorged, their crowns dewy with need. He used his free hand to grasp the nearest spadix and pumped it in rhythm with the other.

The entire cavern rippled, as if catching its breath.

Luo Binghe shifted his head to take in another spadix drooling with nectar on its tip and popped it into his mouth.

“B-Binghe!” She cried out. The spadix stiffened and grew in Luo Binghe’s mouth, tickling the back of his throat. He sucked, drinking down the sweet juices, working his tongue along the soft ridges. Soft squelching from both of his hands grasping two other spadixes filled the cavern.

“Ah— Oh—!” Princess Aniya exclaimed, and for a long moment she was silent. But the entire cavern shuddered as if in an earthquake, the vines above swaying like pendulums, the leaves trembling. And then a sweet wetness shot into Luo Binghe’s mouth, and the dozens of other spadixes spurted out the same sticky nectar and coated Luo Binghe’s face, his chest, arms and his entire body with it. A warm, electric thrill ran up and down Luo Binghe body. The nectar was cool on his overheated skin, and his cock, still wrapped in that silky vine, grew harder, his building arousal torturous yet sweet.

“I-I came…” Princess Aniya sounded as if her own orgasm shocked her. “I came in Luo Binghe’s mouth.”

Luo Binghe couldn’t help the smug grin on his face. “You did very well, my dear.”

“……"

“Is something the matter?”

A rustle. “Why am I not back to normal? I dual cultivated with a Heavenly Demon. Isn’t that enough?”

“But Aniya—”

“It’s supposed to be a cure-all! I demand a refund!”

“Aniya!” He raised his voice to cut through her hysteria. “Listen to this husband. The dual cultivation is incomplete.”

“Incomplete??! What should be done, then?”

“Physical penetration is required. Through the lower dantian.”

“Then it’s impossible. I don’t have… a… vagina. I don’t even have a body!” she wailed.

“Aniya, please. Calm down. This husband will show you how.”

With his fingers, he gathered the sticky nectar on his chest and brought his slick-coated fingers to his anus.

“What— How?! You can’t be serious.” Princess Aniya sounded genuinely horrified. “Has Lord Luo done this before?”

“No,” he said, and inserted two slick fingers at once. The sudden stretch burned, but he found that he liked it, the foreign sensation of being filled. “But there’s a first time for anything.”

“Y-You don’t have to do this.” The vines slithered some more until they cupped Luo Binghe’s buttocks.

“Why not?”

“Because you’re the stallion protagonist!”

Stallion protagonist. It was a term used repeatedly in the libelous tome Luo Binghe had read.

“And if this stallion protagonist wanted to rewrite his story?”

Princess Aniya sputtered, but seemed unable to form further comment. The vines cupping Luo Binghe’s bottom tightened and tugged sideways, prying his butt cheeks apart.

Once he’d stretched himself, he commanded, “Wife, enter your husband.”

Despite her mumbled protests, Princess Aniya obediently positioned a spadix—the largest, most engorged one, glistening with viscous nectar—under Luo Binghe’s backside. The wet, ridged crown nudged against his hole. Luo Binghe bit back a moan. His cock jerked in response, more precome dribbling from the slit.

Luo Binghe waited but the spadix remained unmoving, the entire cavern descended into stillness. As if Princess Aniya, at the face of this great precipice, was at a loss on what to do. Taking pity on her, and unable to wait any longer, his cock aching and hard as steel, he grasped the spadix and sank into it. He descended, his body opening up inch by agonizing inch, and didn’t stop until the entire shaft was inside.

“O-Ohhh…” Princess Aniya moaned. The vines around Luo Binghe’s waist and thighs coiled tighter.

Luo Binghe took several deep breaths to adjust. The slide had burned, but it felt good. “We’ll have to move,” he said voice strained.

Fortunately, Princess Aniya needed no further prodding. With the spadix still buried firmly in Luo Binghe’s hole, the vines shifted and seized his limbs, spreading his legs. Vines curled around his knees to keep them bent at the perfect angle.

And then without further ado, the spadix started pistoning in and out.

Luo Binghe groaned, pleasure shooting up his spine. The spadix’s flared ridges caressed his insides, and every thrust bored into his core, stuffing him to the brim, filling the yawning void deep within him.

He’d never felt this way before. Not with any other wife or fling. Throwing himself headlong into the fires of pleasure, allowing the flames to surge until they consumed him completely. It was like his soul was cracked open, all his armor stripped away. Everything that was Luo Binghe burned to ash until nothing remained but a weak, half-demon child, abandoned and set afloat on the Luo River on the coldest day of the year.

And he wanted Aniya to do the same, for his wife to lay herself bare. To give herself to him completely, the way he was doing now.

There was so much he wanted to tell her, ever since the first moments he stepped into the cavern. The words slipped from his lips.

“I know you’re not Aniya.”

The thrusting stilled, and the entire cavern plunged into silence.

“What do you mean?”

“There’s no need to hide. Wandering little spirit, you have replaced my wife.” Even as he said the words, he rocked back against the spadix, impaling himself deeper. Precum spurted from his cock, pleasure boiling his blood.

“Replaced your wife?” The little spirit sputtered, but resumed its shallow thrusts. “T-That’s ridiculous!”

“You’re someone else inhabiting her body. When was it that you slipped in? Was it after the fever?”

Though the spirit continued rocking, it was silent, and Luo Binghe knew he must have hit the truth.

“What’s Luo Binghe’s proof?”

Luo Binghe laughed. “Oh, my precious wandering spirit. You don’t even talk or act like Princess Aniya. Even sharing the same face and the same body, you aren’t like her at all.” A flared ridge brushed against his prostate at the right angle and he let out a low moan. He grasped a nearby vine for support. “But this entire place?” he gasped, and waved his hand in a flourish. “It’s you.” The creeping vines, the soft moss, the damp walls, the phallic flowers, the strange panels with the demon mark, the tomes defending Luo Binghe. It was all connected. “I’m inside you, seeing you, touching you, knowing and discovering your very depths.”

The spirit groaned, its spadix thrusting faster and faster, hitting the spot that made Luo Binghe see stars. “Y-You don’t know me.”

Luo Binghe recalled her standing beside the tent flap, hesitance written across her face. The blade-sharp pine needles she had used to hunt the gecko, reminiscent of razor-like bamboo leaves. The shy, virginal kiss at the boulder. The way her first instinct was to push Luo Binghe out of harm, even at her own expense.

The disparate pieces aligned, the final piece clicking into place.

Luo Binghe closed his eyes and took a moment to collect himself, holding back the mingled tides of pleasure and joy just long enough to let the words escape. When he spoke, his voice only slightly trembled. “But I do. I’ve met you before. You were what was denied to me, yet freely given to another. This is fate correcting itself. You and I belong together.”

The spirit hesitated. Then it answered, “Binghe,” and slammed against him. “My Binghe.”

With a choked cry, Luo Binghe met its every stroke. “Yes. Your Binghe.” The vines around his cock slithered, coiling tighter and tighter. Pleasure-pain from being denied relief boiled within him, winding his pleasure higher and higher.

“We will get married, you and I,” Luo Binghe wheezed out. “It will be the grandest ceremony, never seen before in all three realms.”

The spirit’s thrusting broke into a frenzy, churning Luo Binghe’s insides. Suddenly, a cool wetness flooded him from the inside. But before he could get his bearings, he was tossed, and he was caught mid-air by another spadix impaling him. Luo Binghe shouted, white cum finally spurting from his cock and arcing in the air.

“I won’t allow another new wife,” the spirit said as it fucked in and out of Luo Binghe. “No more rescuing random maidens with more bosom than brains.”

“No more wives,” Luo Binghe gasped between harsh pants, searing pleasure bursting behind his eyelids.

The vines coiled tighter around him. “Sha Hualing, the Little Palace Mistress, Qiu Haitang and the others—I want them out of my sight.”

“They will be banished to the cold palace,” Luo Binghe said, delight curling in his gut at the little spirit’s audacity. “Then divorced. And I will crown you empress.”

More slick shot into his insides, and the spadix withdrew. Luo Binghe had scarcely begun to mourn the loss when another spadix entered him.

“You’re mine,” the spirit said as it wrenched another orgasm from Luo Binghe.

“Then claim me,” Luo Binghe said.

Another spadix entered him then another, and another, each depositing its viscous nectar until Luo Binghe’s belly swelled with it. Bit by bit, the spirit lost its inhibitions.

“Binghe is so warm, so tight.”

“Yes.”

“Your face is so beautiful.”

“Yes.”

“Your abs… Your cock… Unreal.”

“It’s all real.”

“How can you be so perfect? Better than a dream.”

Luo Binghe shuddered, each new praise like a jolt that traveled straight to his cock. Oversensitive, a mere brush of a leaf against his cock made him cum. Ecstasy overtook him, his vision blurring. Before his vision whited out, he pleaded, “Beloved spirit, what’s your true name?”

As he fell into the abyss of unconsciousness, his last memory was of cool, soft leaves curling all around him, wiping the sweat and slick from his skin and cocooning him in their embrace.

When he came to, he was staring up at a wide expanse of blue sky, slants of morning sun warming his skin. The ancient tree was gone. In its place spread a lush carpet of grass where the thousand-year old cypress had once stood, and upon which he now lay, naked on his back.

Another figure was straddling him, also naked. A face neither masculine nor feminine stared back at him, its features three parts Aniya’s and seven parts of another. Pointy ears peeked out the sides of their head and the long fall of their golden hair obscured their bare chest. Their soft cock lay over the hairs on Luo Binghe’s groin, and he could feel the slick warmth of a hidden pussy pressing against his skin.

Where they touched the ground, plants sprouted from the earth, their tender stalks reaching for the sun.

But their eyes. They were familiar. A bright green, clear and refreshing as spring. Luo Binghe reached out to cup their cheek.

The figure leaned into Luo Binghe’s palm and spoke. “Shen Yuan. My name is Shen Yuan.”

All around them, the forest burst into full bloom.