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The sound of raindrops hitting the thin fabric above her was familiar. She had spent many days and nights here, on a broken chair, in an abandoned city, underneath flimsy fabric that somehow held despite all the years. Smoke pooled in her lungs for a precious few moments before her breath washed it all away into the rain. Smoking was a rather new habit of hers, certainly not something Haruka would have approved of. She could almost hear her voice, the angry stomps of her feet and the small exhales she’d so often did when mad.
She took another long drag of her cigarette, settling her mind somewhat, but not much. Funny how the benefits started to disappear over time. The door to the abandoned shop behind her opened, an old bell ringing with a dull sound. An old enemy stepped out, hair the color of ash had been cut short in a messy sort of way; She’d probably done it by herself in that dirty apartment she called home.
“Hey.”
“Yo.”
A moment of silence passed, not as tense as it used to be; Back when there were things worth fighting for.
“You know, Kao, it’s a bit difficult to think that a whole decade passed already.”
Rain continued to fall.
“Yeah… I know.”
A decade. Ten long years without the three of them. Without the cheerful friend who she’d had a crush on. Without the cool, composed, pervert that had saved her countless times. Without… the villain who she had come to call a friend. It’s a bit funny, how they fell one after another like dominoes. First had been Sayo, who hadn’t been able to take the pressure of the world. Then, Haruka hadn’t been able to accept the absence of their friend. And finally, Baiser… or, well, Utena. Kiwi had never told her why Utena decided to…
“I think… that this would have happened no matter what.”
Smoke once again.
“Really?”
“…I hope so.”
Because admitting they could have done something hurt more than thinking of it as an absolute.
“Kiwi-” She choked on air, “Agh- uh right. Kiwi, we can’t avoid it. We could have done something. But we didn’t. Not because we were weak, or because we’re bad people… We just, didn’t really think about it much.” And wasn’t that a sad thought? “I mean, who would have thought that perfect Azul would ever crumble under pressure? That cheerful Magenta would be sad? That Baiser, the villain, cared more about others than herself?”
Kiwi leaned on her chair for support, making it creak and groan under the added weight. “…I guess that’s true. But, I just- I don’t know how to simply accept it. It’s been ten years but I’m still… trapped by it. Utena had been the first person to really look at me and decide I was worth something, that I was cute, pretty, worth keeping. I won’t ever be able to find someone like her again…”
A moment passed. The smell of rain filled the air, occasionally overpowered by the bad habit in her hand. Her old enemy really hadn’t been able to move on, even after so long…
“Come here. C’mon.” She gestured at her lap.
“I- what?”
“Don’t worry, the chair can take it. Now sit on my lap, you’re probably tired of standing.”
“…Alright.”
A soft weight pressed against her, hesitant for a moment before fully letting itself be held up by her and an increasingly protesting chair. Kiwi had always been taller than her, but now it looked a bit ridiculous with the girl’s back blocking her own vision. Her cigarette was thrown to the side and into the rain; No need to keep it and subject her old enemy to the smoke. Her arms snaked around the girl and wrapped themselves into a hug.
Kiwi flailed around slightly. “Hold on, what are you-!”
She pressed her head into her friend’s back. “Shh. You said that you wouldn’t find anyone like Utena again, right? That nobody would ever see you as someone worth keeping? Well, would you look at that! I’m quite literally keeping you in my arms.”
“…bitch.”
“Hmhm, sure. But, honestly, I do think ima keep ya. I mean, haven’t we been going on dates these last couple years? All those times we met up to mope about how we wished it could be different… Plus that one time you bought me dinner because you felt guilty.”
“I wasn’t feeling guilty!”
Silence, rain falling.
“I guess…” Kiwi’s voice sounded raw, like a wound that hadn’t scabbed over just yet. “I guess I wouldn’t mind not having to pay as much for my apartment every month. Alright… I guess we can… date.” The last word was a whisper, like it was taboo, somehow.
“You think they would have been surprised about it?”
“…No. Utena had always been a bit stranger than most, I think she would have been happy- excited even.”
“Maybe Sayo would have been happy too. After all, I’m pretty sure she’d been in love with Baiser for some time.”
“Her and Baiser?” A small, wet, chuckle sounded out. “I guess I can see it. She always was easier to catch than you and Magenta. Probably was hoping for some alone time with Utena- I wouldn’t blame her.”
A small smile appeared, soft, weak, likely to disappear in a breeze… but it was there nonetheless.
“Pretty sure she did. Now, who would Magenta be with? That girl that always sang?”
“Nah, Matama was with Nemo at the time. Probably still is actually. And, well, I don’t think she’d be with anyone specifically- or she’d be with everyone at the same time. She’s always seemed like someone with an overabundance of love.”
“Like a cup full to the brim, with more water being poured in.”
“Yep.”
The rain continued to fall, fat drops of water that left a humid trail in their wake. Kaoruko held on tighter onto kiwi, like an anchor in a storm. They’d be dating soon enough, the both of them… and wasn’t that an exciting thought? Today of all days, in rain and with the lingering smell of smoke. On the same day that she’d lost Azul, on the same day as things began to fall apart… the both of them were at the start of something brand new.
There was poetry in there somewhere, she knew, but she wasn’t bothered to find it.