Chapter Text
The strings of Dess’ guitar shivered alongside her body.
The dissonant strings let out screeching, distressed noises, as if they could feel their owner’s anxiety. Dess still couldn’t believe it.
Just a day ago, she had asked Asriel to dance with her. Well, no, that wasn’t quite right — she’d asked the boy to come with her to the Sadie Hawkman’s dance, in roughly a month. Still, those details didn’t truly matter, as Asriel had said yes.
How many years had they loved each other ? That was a question to which Dess had no answer. The boy had always held a special place in her heart, a status above everyone else — and now, she might finally put a label on their relationship. In a few hours, they’d be a couple, she’d make sure of it. The doe quickly played a few quiet chords, her hand running wildly across the guitar. An errant note, louder than the rest, reminded her to be prudent.
Indeed, it was 4:40 A.M., and she was supposed to be asleep. When she’d invited Asriel to the dance, Dess had taken the opportunity to ask him to sneak out, so that they could meet in her room. He’d come over at dawn, then slip back home before his parents woke up. This was her chance to make their relationship official, when the fire of her invitation to dance still burnt hot. Yet, a slight worry itched at the back of her mind. What if Asriel chickened out ? What if he forgot her instructions on how to sneak in unnoticed?
She expressed her doubts through her guitar, a few dying and violent notes whispering into the void.
4:45. Asriel should be here soon. Dess bit the inside of her mouth, readjusting her hair.
She wondered how Asriel was doing, in that very moment.
Asriel wasn’t a particularly brave monster. In fact, he’d describe himself as, if not a coward, at least more than a little fearful. In this moment, however, Asriel was completely and undeniably scared shitless. Doubt filled his mind and hormones made it wander, anchoring him to a state of anxious consciousness. He counted sheep over and over, continuously losing count, disorienting himself. The only thing he could keep track of was the slight glow of his alarm clock, inexorably ticking closer to when he’d have to sneak out. To when he’d spend time with Dess. The goat instinctively bleated, his body tensing, before a swiftly given self-slap brought him back to reality.
The monster squinted his eyes, attempting to see through the darkness of the early dawn, imagining Kris’ peaceful slumber. Asriel couldn’t help but bite his cheek out of slight jealousy. His little sibling slept like a rock, and was as immobile as one while they rested. Not a sentence, not a word, not even the slightest snore escaped their mouth. It always heavily surprised him just how calm Kris’ sleep was, as the human was a flurry of activity during the day, destroying everything in their path like a tiny tornado. Perhaps Kris was like a music box, who needed to be wound up for hours before exploding into unstoppable action.
His alarm clock, set onto the quietest setting, kindly let out a horribly loud screech, worthy of an air raid siren. The goat jumped, crushing the off button as fast as he could. Everything was noisier than expected, this early in the morning. He had to be careful.
4:50 A.M. I’ll get there at 5:00, leave at 6:10, and be home ten minutes before my parents wake up. Asriel repeated his plan as if it was a hymn. It’ll be fine, he thought, that sentence quickly becoming his personal maxim. He slowly got out of bed, the bedsheet’s creasing thumping in his ears almost as loudly as his heart. He walked carefully through the darkness, hands extended, searching for the singular window. Asriel repeatedly patted the wall, coming dangerously close to knocking down a few trophies before his hand finally landed onto the curtains, and then onto the window’s handle.
The nascent sun’s light was nearly blinding, its orange hue burning itself into his maladjusted retinas. The frigid wind of the outside caressed his clothes, carrying both an encouragement and a call to prudence. Asriel sat on the windowsill, closed the window, and jumped down. A rush of adrenaline coursed through his veins. It’ll be fine ! That was the hardest part, Asriel bluntly lied to himself, as he slowly walked away from his house, which he’d left without permission for the first time. Many times he had stayed over at the Holidays’ without asking, even more times he’d come home later than allowed, but he’d never snuck out, not once in his entire life.
He looked back towards his home, one last time, then started to run. He ran with more vivacity than at any race, with more agility than any animal. He ran faster than ever before, chasing not only the wind, but the promise of freedom, the promise of love. His breath smelled like fire as it fogged up his glasses, smoke and sweat climbing high into the sky. Hometown became not much more than a vague blur, and he basked in the flashing light of the lamp posts, engulfing him like the concert lights Dess always spoke about. This was his entry into teenagehood, a baptism for what he hoped would be a new era of his life.
Before he knew it, he’d arrived at the Holiday manor, slipped through the gate’s hole, leaped high through the air onto Dess’ wall, squeezed through her open window as a blur of fluff and hormones, before finally landing in the middle of the girl’s room, bringing with him a true cacophony of yelps and bleats.
“Dude, what the fuck !? Be quiet !” Dess tried her best to yell while whispering, her voice taking on an uncharacteristic screechiness. The doe’s wide eyes indicated surprise — certainly due to Asriel’s glorious entry — but also annoyance of the highest order. Internally, she sighed, regretting that ass beatings always had to be loud, and that therefore she couldn’t hit that dumbass goat with her bat.
Dess’ sight instantly dissipated any illusions of grandiloquent freedom Asriel felt, the hole they left in his mind instantly filled by the passionate delusions of love. Any gained eloquence melted into stuttering, brash confidence morphing into a terrible shyness.
“Um, sorry. I got… carried away, haha.” He muttered, eyes driven downwards.
“Yeah, I saw that, dude.” Dess rolled her eyes, perhaps to divert attention away from the large, insuppressible smile decorating her face. “How’d you even manage to make that much noise ? I swear, did you climb through the window or somehow fall from the ground to my room ?”
Asriel’s face grew bright red, as he stammered out a response. “I’m sorry ! Jeez !”
Dess laughed, then shushed the boy with a simple hand gesture. It was, indeed, 5:00 A.M. It was perhaps better to stay on the quieter side of an argument. Like she always did when Asriel came over, Dess gave a few quick pats to her bed, inviting him to sit by her side. The goat quietly sat down, engaging in the ancient art of avoiding eye contact, all while deeply desiring it. The girl played the same game, scoring decisive points by toying with her hair.
The doe cleared her throat, feigning confidence. It was odd for her to feel doubt. She was used to being carried by instinct, so when that flow of action failed her, she had no way to cope, no way to land on her feet.
“So ! Um… About that dance…” her fingers innocently played on an invisible guitar, subject to an anxious tic. “We’re… not really going as friends, right ?”
Asriel gulped, feeling himself shrink into less than nothingness. He was a speck of dust, drowning in the bursting waterfall that was his love. “Yeah… We… um… I… I…” The words bounced and slipped in his mind like wet bars of soap. Dess was quickly losing patience — her hair was twirling faster and faster — and Asriel was all too aware of it, the cadence of his stuttering growing more frantic.
“Okay, I’ll do the talking, Azzy.” Dess gave the boy a little slap, to his large relief.
“We… I love you.” An anvil the size of several buildings slid off Dess’ back and landed square in Asriel’s throat.
The goat opened his mouth, attempting to reply. “I… I love you too.”
The anvil of social anxiety, now weighing in at only a few tonnes, split in half and jumped onto the two lovers. After years upon years spent bearing its full weight, however, it felt lighter than any feather.
Dess smiled, making eye contact with Asriel. “Uh, great ! I’d love to be not only your best friend… but also your girlfriend !” Communicating had gotten considerably easier, as she felt the burning flow of instinct slowly take control.
Asriel bleated, blushing deeply. “Th— That’s cool ! B— But… can we keep this on the down low ?” Seeing his girlfriend’s — oh sweet Angel above, girlfriend’s — face turn sour, he quickly justified himself. “N— Not for long ! It’s just… I don’t know if mom’ll allow us to hang out together before and after the dance, if she… knows.”
Dess knew Asriel’s reasoning was a half-truth. She perfectly understood that a large portion of Asriel’s desire for secrecy was the sheer embarrassment of being a couple in middle school, in a small town, especially when your siblings of the brattiest age tagged along on every single outing.
“Sure. So, what do you wanna do now ?” Dess bit the bottom of her lip, resisting a hormonal urge. No, she couldn’t kiss him yet, that’d have to wait for another time — when they’d be alone for longer, when Asriel didn’t have to leave shortly after, somewhere where they could be as rough and loud and…
“Dess ? D— Did you hear me ?” The boy’s worried expression brought her back to reality. She nodded no, shrugging her shoulders apologetically. “I… we could plan a hango— a, a date !” He fiddled adorably with his fur, scratching the back of his head.
“Heh, sure.” The doe quietly reflected for a few seconds, under Asriel’s admiring gaze. Slowly, without a single word, Dess reached for the boy’s hand. Her familiar touch felt electrifying. Asriel was used to it — countless times had they bickered, pinched, and lifted each other — but through this novel romantic lens, her touch took on new aspects, and carried deeper intimacy. It was strangely wonderful, encouraging his mind to roam. He wondered how it would feel, to be softly caressed, to be brought ever closer to her, not only emotionally, but physically.
Dess slowly moved his hand around, tracing invisible lines across her bedsheets. “This is Hometown, ‘mkay ?” She said, her words accompanied by a smooth, circular motion. Their fingers headed south. “This is the forest. Tomorrow we planned to go there with Kris and ‘Elly, right ?”
An infatuated Asriel nodded along. “Well, we’ll ditch ‘em. Tell Kris to pull a prank on Noelle, and they’ll head left…” Dess raised Asriel’s hand, before bluntly dropping it far away from where she’d indicated the prank would take place. “And we’ll go right ! We’ll be… alone for a while. It’ll take those gremlins a long time to find us.”
A bright smile impatiently waited for compliments, which her yes-man promptly gave. “It’ll be great, promise ya’.”
“We’ve still got a few minutes, Dess.” Asriel called out after an anxious look at his watch. Dess swiftly picked up her guitar, swatting away the boy’s objections about the loudness of their concerts.
“It’s fine, dude. We won’t play hard rock.” She giggled, strumming a few chords. “I’ve got something chill figured out, no one will hear a thing.”
The boy acquiesced, awkwardly fiddling with the lyrics he’d just been given on a shoddy piece of paper. He loved Dess very much, but the same couldn’t be said for her handwriting.
“You’ll whistle along to all of it, I’ll tell ya’ when to chat.” She instructed, before beginning a dramatic countdown with her fingers. Three… Two… A funny thought passed through her mind, which she immediately acted upon. The musician began playing one second early, an annoyed cry escaping from Asriel’s mouth.
“Sorry.” Dess didn’t say, instead opting to laugh. After a few seconds of petty chaos, the little band had gotten back on track.
The song was a slow serenade, reminding Asriel of nearly forgotten nursery rhymes. Its melody was quiet and gentle, with melancholic undertones, and it sounded odd, escaping from Dess’ guitar. The doe was so brash, so rebellious, yet her music was capable of an emotional depth he couldn’t begin to match. Asriel couldn’t wrap his mind around it — he found no explanation other than Dess simply being unique. The wave of the director’s invisible wand ordered the singer to start his part.
“Come follow me into the dark…” Asriel’s voice was low, barely audible, and yet its angelic sound filled Dess’ ears. The verses melted into words, into vowels, before becoming mere notes, accompaniments to the boy’s beautiful timber. In pure awe of each other, they continued playing, aware of nothing, concerned by nothing. For a few minutes, in a waking town, the two children slowly sang the day into being.
The guitar gave one last whisper, Dess’ hands coming to rest on her waist.
“That was...” She couldn’t quite find the words to describe what had just happened. December often played music, almost always with Asriel, and yet her art had never felt this alive. The creative process, which was deeply engrained within her, which had brought her so much pleasure, had suddenly gained newfound depth in companionship. Her spirit had found a dialogist, a partner to which it furiously latched on to.
“Yeah… I… I think I gotta get going…” Asriel mumbled, almost catatonic, fully entranced by the girl. Dess grabbed his hand once more, mere inches from his face. Asriel’s heartbeat was fast enough to have turned into a rumbling purr, like that of an engine. For a few instants, Dess’ mind deliberated, finally coming to a compromise.
Her lips landed on the boy’s right cheek, their bright red colour instantly spreading to his face.
“See you soon.” She whispered, guiding her lover to the window. A purely mechanical force animated Asriel’s limbs as he climbed down, his SOUL having left for heaven long ago. He walked automatically, exiting the Holidays’ domain without a single thought. Only once the ornate gate was far behind him did the boy’s consciousness return. He struggled to breathe, out of excitement, out of sheer amazement.
A peck on the cheek already, he thought. Oh, Angel, what will she do on our date…? Asriel suppressed his wilder fantasies to avoid fainting in the middle of the road. The Sun in the east reminded the monster that it was just 6:00 A.M., that he’d be in math class in less than two hours. A full day of school waited for him. A full day spent in a tiny, cramped room, imprisoned alongside ten other unwilling teenagers, imprisoned alongside Dess. Eight hours of sheer terror awaited him, chained to his desk as much as to Dess’ gaze.
Asriel suddenly realised the weight of his nascent relationship. Dess was his closest friend, she was always by his side, no matter what. And so, every part of his life was now painted over in brand new colours, seen through a different lens. He had crushed on Dess for years, but only now could he begin to truly love her. He didn’t know how much his life would change because of his love. Asriel only knew that he couldn’t wait to find out just how far that passion would take him.