Chapter Text
I groggily woke on the couch and grabbed my ringing phone from the side table, looking at the name on the call screen. Then I was instantly awake. The team was out, had been for a week and there were limited reasons I’d get a phone call, let alone in the middle of the night Wakandan time. None of them are good.
“Nat?”
“Is Loki with you?”
The cat lying on top of me perked up. “Yeah, Lo’s right here. What’s up?”
“We have a bit of a problem. Something got Steve and-”
My heart nearly kicked out of my chest and Lo moved as I sat up. “Is he okay?!”
“Can’t tell. Trying to figure out what’s wrong. I’m going to send you a picture. See if Loki can tell you anything about what it is.”
The phone beeped in my hand and I opened the message. “A plant got Steve?” I showed Lo and her ears flattened against her skull while I put it on speakerphone.
“Do they know what it is?”
My brow furrowed at what I felt in my mind. “Yeah, she wants to know how far out you are.”
“ETA-” Her voice was cut off with a painful scream in the background and my lungs all but stopped working. “Shit. That’s the worst yet... Two hours?”
“Lo wants to know if there’s a greenish powder on him and if anyone touched it. And what you did with the plant.”
“As soon as he got shot with it he started acting weird and wouldn’t let anyone near him. We were in the process of burning the lab out when it exploded and got him.”
“How long ago?” I relayed the mental question.
“Been in the air for six hours, so maybe seven? He locked himself in the cargo hold five hours ago and barricaded the door. He started screaming like that maybe an hour ago and it’s only gotten worse.”
“So nobody has seen or touched him in that time?”
“No.”
“That is very bad. The dust is not a pollen or spore, rather a defensive toxin. It raises the heart rate and blood pressure in a victim, engaging their nervous system to an extreme degree and causes spikes in certain hormones and neurotransmitters. In its natural habitat, a fire will cause the plant to fire the sticky seedpods in every direction and the explosion of powder inhaled causes the victim to experience cardiac arrest or burst blood vessels with the added side effect of terror followed by euphoria. The victim flees, moving the seed away from the parent plant and the perceived danger, then ‘dies happy’, if you will, so to provide nitrous fertilizer for the growing sapling.”
“Ok, Lo says… Wait, what?” My eyes shot to the cat beside me and Lo gave me a deadly serious look. “Like a carnivorous plant? Or that and a cordyceps combined?”
“What is it, Cookie? C’mon, help us out here, Lo.” I heard Sam say in the background while I parsed what Lo had just told me. Good to know I was on speakerphone with them as well.
“Consider yourself lucky it was one of your supersoldiers. By all rights, even he should have been dead by now.”
“Just a second, Nat.” I looked down at her. “The fuck do you mean he should be dead?!”
“I can only assume it is the more robust nature of his body and its healing factor, but the substance would have killed a normal human hours ago. It is generally a matter of less than four hours. Without any physical contact to slake the fire, that is.”
“To slake the…” I knew she was making a slight pun, but this particular turn of phrase in Asgardian had a specific connotation.
“The same toxins often create different effects in different species, particularly those not coevolved. This one Asgardians found to be particularly useful in pursuits of pleasure. Humans are compatible enough that it functions in much the same way. If anything, it causes an even more intense aphrodisiac response.”
“Lo, are you saying this is…” I couldn’t even wrap my head around it.
She all but rolled her eyes. “You of all humans ought not to be taken aback by this concept. I have read some of your more lowbrow literary choices, pet.”
I rubbed my brow. “Lo, Imma need you to just spell this one out for me like I’m five.”
“Nisse, do not be dense simply because you do not care for my answer. Your beloved captain’s life hangs in the balance.”
“Ok, but how does it work? Just anyone?”
“No, it must be someone the victim is attracted to in order to fully ease the hormonal spikes, better if there are feelings. The deeper the connection and greater release of endorphins and what you call “happy” and “love” hormones, like oxytocin and dopamine, the more relief the victim will experience. One distillation made of the plant is used in fertility rituals and therefore requires the potential for procreation, though I do not know whether that is a property inherent to the plant’s toxin itself or simply the magic used in the potion’s production. Simply put, a mere helping hand will not get the job done. Perhaps even make it worse.”
“Nat… you need to convince him to decon. The effects are from inhalation and ingestion of the substance thrown off by the seedpods of that plant.”
“He did as soon as we got on the quin. Tac suit is in a containment bag.”
“Where’s Buck?”
“Back there trying to talk to Steve, but he’s damn near incoherent.”
“That is a very bad sign, nisse. He may recover if he can be treated, but we must at least stop the progression quickly.”
“I need to talk to him.”
“Cookie, I don’t like where this is going.” Nat sounded the most worried I’d ever heard her on a job. “What are we looking at?”
“Nat, you’re not going to believe it.”
I could hear her moving around. “Girl, try me.”
“Sex pollen.”
There was a long pause. “You’re serious.”
“As the heart attack Steve’s gonna have if we don’t get him some help.”
“You know he’s never going to agree to-”
“That’s why I need to talk to Buck. Steve’s demi so not just anybody is going to be able to help him. As far as I know it's a fairly short list of options. Even shorter list who he could be convinced to let help him under the circumstances.”
“So you or Bucky,” her voice was tight.
“So, if Lo is right, and knowing Steve, just Bucky right now and that’s gonna be a fight. At least until you get home. I’ll be at the hangar waiting.”
“Just under two hours.”
“I remember. Let me talk to Buck.”
“Tell me, sweetheart.” Bucky’s voice came over the line.
“Long or short version?”
There was another muffled scream. “Short.”
“Go fuck Steve.”
“What?”
“Like a lot. Now.”
There was a pause. “I’m gonna need a little longer, sweetheart.”
“You need to get in there and fuck our beloved like his life depends on it, cause it does.”
“Not like I need convincing,” I could hear the smirk in his voice, “but a little longer?”
“The stuff he got shot with is basically sex pollen, his body is going haywire and the only reason he hasn’t already had a heart attack or a brain aneurysm is the serum. Basically, he’s horny enough to literally die and we gotta flood his system with happy brain chemistry until his body filters out the toxin and resets itself.”
He was quiet for a long moment. “That makes sense. Kept moving like he was afraid of me touching him. He spent a long time in the decon. Got him some sweats and within minutes he all but ran to the cargo hold and stripped them off like they were burning him. Like when he has a bad sensory day. Then he barricaded himself in. Tried talking to him, but it was like even the sound of my voice hurt him.”
“You’ve got to get him to let you in, Buck. He can’t be alone.”
“I’ve been trying, he won’t answer me anymore.”
“Is he-”
“He’s moving around. I can hear him. He’s in a lot of pain, but he’s alive.
“Let me try. Put me on speaker for him, so I can explain what’s happening. And Buck?”
“Yeah, sweetheart.”
“If you go in there, it might not be the Steve you and I know…” I listened to the cat, now at my feet, as I talked. “Lo says it’ll be… Primal. Animalistic.”
“Threatening me with a good time, doll.”
“I mean it, Bucky. This isn't a scene you’re walking into.” I said sharply, needing him to understand the gravity of what I was saying. “Be careful. He won’t be in his right mind. Might not know everything he’s doing… If he’s really far gone, might not even remember after.”
He was quiet a moment. “Ok, he might not hear a safe word.”
“Right. And he probably won’t have any of that normal Steve restraint on his strength.”
“Got it. I’m putting you back on speaker. Natalia, you and Sam just get us home as fast as you can.” I heard some movement. “Stevie? Steve, Cookie wants to talk to you.”
I heard a bone deep groan, muffled and far away.
“Go ahead, sweetheart, he’ll be able to hear you.”
“Steve? Stevie, we know what’s happening to you, we want to help, but I need you to talk to me.”
“Cookie…” His voice trailed off in a broken moan of pain and my heart felt like it was being squeezed in my chest.
“It’s the green powder from that plant you got hit with, Steve. We can help you, but you need to open the door.”
“No.” It sounded like words were difficult for him. “No, I…”
“Stevie, I need you to let Bucky in. Just him. He can help. I know he can.” I waited for a response. “Stevie, do you trust me?” There was silence again, then I heard movement.
“He’s letting me in. Wish me luck.”
“You don’t need it, love. Just gotta get that man to fuck the living daylights out of you, and you’re a pro at that.”
He chuckled darkly. Then a gasp left him. “Shit, Stevie… Sweetheart I gotta go, I’ll see you when we get back.”
“What? Bucky, what’s happening?’
“It’s bad. I gotta go.”
“Bucky!”
“Barnes!” I heard Nat again. “Barnes, don’t! Shit!”
“Nat what’s happening?!”
“I don’t know, I couldn’t see anything. Steve opened the door and Barnes took one look, threw me the phone and shut it again.”
“Go back to the cockpit with Sam and shut the door. You don’t want to hear.” There were voices, a crash and the sounds of a fight, and then a guttural, punched out sound followed by a low moan that was less pain than I'd heard in Steve’s voice a few moments ago.
“I think you’re probably right…” She said. “See you in about an hour and half.”
“I’ll be there.”
She hung up and I started planning for a high maintenance super soldier.
An hour and a half later I was standing in the open hangar with a duffle slung crossbody, leaning on my cane as the quin pulled inside. Lo looked up at me with a worried expression, pressed against my leg.
“Yeah, I know. That’s why I got this.” I shrugged the duffle a little on my shoulder. “Insurance.” I shot her a look. “Of course not. Insurance for him. So we can at least get him home.”
The jet parked and the ramp came down. Nat pulled me into a quick hug. “You need a hand?”
I shook my head. “Go get the car from the tarmac. Pull it in behind the quin and keep the engine running. We’re gonna get Steve home as quickly and quietly as we can manage.”
“They sure haven’t been quiet so far. I think Sam wants to tear his ears off and bleach his brain.”
I chuckled. “As long as you can still hear them, that's probably the best we can hope for right now.”
She gave me a serious look. “Are you sure about this?”
I pulled her into another hug. “Sure as I’ve ever been about anything.” I started up the ramp, Lo glued to my side, making sure I didn’t use my reserves before it was needed.
I paused at the top as Sam passed me with a containment bag and a half shaken expression. “Good luck in there, girl.”
I patted his shoulder. “Take my scooter, get that suit straight to Shuri’s lab and incinerate it, Sam. Just throw it in, don’t even open the bag. Use gloves and decon after. Nat is taking us home, Lo says it could be days before it works out of his system with as much of a dose as he probably took.” I gave them both a smirk as I headed back to the cargo hold. “Happy birthday to me.”
We parted ways and a moment later I was at the door of the cargo hold. “Hey, guys, it’s me.” I heard some movement inside. “Buck? Steve?”
Scuffling and a struggle. “No! Can’t let her-”
“Steve, I know you’re worried about me.” At least he was verbal now, so I knew Bucky had made progress in giving him some relief. “It’s okay. You don’t have to let me in yet. I brought you some things I think’ll help. Just open the door enough and I’ll pass them through to Bucky. You don’t have to be near me until it feels safe enough for you.”
I could hear them talking, then a few moments later, the door slid open a little and I could see Bucky’s hand, deep bruises in the shape of Steve’s hand encircling his wrist.
“Smells like sex in there,” I said blandly and Bucky snorted. I knelt and opened the duffle to start handing him items.
“Damn, this would have been handy a couple hours ago.” He sounded exhausted.
“I don’t know why you don’t keep them on hand when the two of you go out.” The largest piece of the vibranium set of restraints, meant to fit around the arms and chest above the elbow disappeared through the crack. “I brought the full set. Use however much Steve feels like he needs to get home.” They were made with the intent to hold Bucky if he lost control while they were working on his brainwashing. The last time they’d been used was restraining Jack when they rescued him from HAMMER. One of the few mobile ways in existence to fully restrain a supersoldier, if needed. I handed him the wrist cuffs next, followed by the ankle manacles and the connector chain to hobble him, if he felt it was needed.
The door closed and I heard them talking, low and intensely. It took a few minutes, but then I heard Bucky again. “Sweetheart, he isn’t listening.”
“Steve,” I tried to keep my voice soft and even in spite of the worry, “I want to bring you home so we can take care of you.”
“Not safe,” I heard him grunt, faint and far back in the room.
“That’s why I brought the restraints. You tested them yourself, remember? So you knew they’d hold Buck.”
“Listen to her, punk.”
“No, it’s… I can feel it… Getting hard to think again.”
“Stevie,” I said gently, “I’m not going to let you hurt me. You know I’m not that kind of reckless.”
Bucky retreated from the door again and I waited, my fingers buried deep in Lo’s ruff.
“Your beloved is a stubborn soul.”
I smiled softly through the door. “He is. But, it’s part of what makes him who he is, and I love that part of him, too.”
“Why? You aren’t one for self-sacrifice, darling. Not when it isn’t you, at any rate.”
I chuckled at the jab. “It depends on why it’s happening, I suppose. I for sure have no patience for it when it comes from self-loathing or guilt.” She just tilted her head a little at me as I looked past the door. “Steve values himself. I’m not worried about him throwing his life away for nothing.”
“What do you fear, darling?”
“That he would give it too easily. For me. Or Buck.” I heard movement again and stood. “Because he believes watching us suffer pains him more than anything he could ever experience. Because he thinks he can handle everything, tough it out, and someday he’s going to be surprised when he finds out he can’t actually ‘do this all day’.”
I heard things shift inside and the door finally opened. Bucky looked rough. I tried not to let it show on my face, because I knew it would kill Steve if he saw. His wrists weren’t the only places with bruises. His shoulders, his hips and thighs, purpling imprints of Steve’s grip bloomed across his skin, vicious hickeys and bite marks over his neck and chest, his muscles had that fine quiver of exhaustion to them. But his face had that slack look it got at the end of a scene sometimes. I reached up and cupped Bucky’s face with a hand. “Ready for a break, Sarge?”
He gave me a tired, half-loopy smile. “Probably, ma’am.”
I stooped down again and pulled a set of his sweats out of the duffle. “Put these on and then there’s a bottle of electrolyte water and a sandwich for you in there. I want you to eat and drink while I talk to Steve, okay? You need a refuel, love, because I’m going to need you later.”
He gave me that dopey grin again. “Yes, ma’am.” He leaned down and kissed me gently as he took the clothes and then I looked toward the back of the room.
Steve had taken every bit of the restraint system, as I expected he would, and now he sat naked on an equipment locker, fully shackled with his hands behind him, raw need rolling off him in waves so strong it felt like a physical thing, like I was standing knee deep in the ocean while high tide rolled in. He looked awful. Every inch of him was flushed and shaking, hair sweat-plastered in every direction. There were scratches all over him, deep claw marks I didn’t think were all Bucky’s doing.
“Hey, Stevie,” I said softly.
As I came close, he looked up at me but not meeting my eyes. His eyes were deeply bloodshot, pupils fully dilated and full of pain, lips chewed raw, his nose had been bleeding into his beard, capillaries burst under his skin in angry splotches everywhere. And in spite of all that he looked up at me like he wanted to eat me alive, panting and chest heaving, cock hard and bigger than I’d ever seen it, purpled and leaking and his balls pulled up tight between his thighs. He groaned my name, fighting himself not to lunge at me. If Bucky’s condition was any indicator, I was going to have to stay in control of the show if I wanted to keep good on my promise of not letting him hurt me.
I leaned down and planted a hand on his chest and he shuddered. “I’m going to help you clear your head for a minute so we can talk,” he met my eyes then, “and you’re going to let me.”
I reached down and drew my fingertip in a feather light touch up the underside of his shaft and his eyes rolled back with a shaky moan. “Cookie… darlin… can’t…”
“Shh… I know, dear…” I ran my other hand through his hair. “Let me take care of you, okay?”
His head lolled back under my touch. I could tell he was overwhelmed and overstimulated and already more sensitive than usual. I wrapped my hand gently around him and he gasped, hips bucking involuntarily. “Can’t let…”
I leaned down close. “I’ve got you, Steve.” He shuddered again. “Do you trust me?”
“Y- saw Buck… I don’t… you… I can’t… Darlin, please… Can’t let…” I could feel the anxiety rising up in him.
“Buck is fine, and I won’t let you hurt me. Neither will he. I promise.” I started to stroke him slowly. “Let me help, honey.”
He moaned as he finally nodded. “Please… hurts…”
“I know, Stevie, I know it does.” I nuzzled along his neck. “Just breathe for me.” I took deep breaths against his skin, slowly stroking him as I did, until he started to follow me. “I’ve got you.” Up with the inhale, down with the exhale as he quivered in my hands like an anxious colt. I very gradually went faster, my other hand stroking his hair, scratching in his beard, stroking over his shoulders and collarbone. “You’re gonna be okay, my sweet captain.” His hips started to rock a little, meeting my strokes. “That’s right… Let yourself feel good…” I purred into his ear. “You’re so hard in my hand, Stevie… You gonna come for me?”
He nodded, panting.
“Please come for me. Need you to come for me, Stevie.” I let him feel me. My love for him, my trust, how much I wanted to hold him and help him. “I want to get my beloved captain home and take care of him like he needs.”
He came right then with a gasp, spilling over my hand and his stomach. I kept going, stroking him fast and now slicked with his cum over just his tip and he jolted, forehead falling on my shoulder until he came again with a strangled grunt. I slowed again over his whole length, adding a twist and rolling my palm over the head at the end of each stroke. He fell back against the wall behind him, back arched and breath heaving. “God, dar-, fuck!” He came again with a cry and barely more than a dribble.
I straightened and wiped my hand on a handkerchief I’d tucked in my back pocket just in case, as I watched him panting and coming back to himself below me.
“Cookie…” he looked fucked out and exhausted, but coherent. I knew it was a momentary reprieve.
“Hey, honey.”
“Darlin, you shouldn’t have-”
“If you’re going to say ‘come to help you’ or anything akin to it, don’t start with me.” I bent down to him again, kissing his brow before drawing his eyes to mine. “I love you, Steven Grant Rogers.” He shivered again with a little sigh. My fingers trailed down his chest to brush the dog tag and ring of white gold resting there on their chain. “‘Through the fires of hell and back’ doesn’t just apply to you.” I kissed his sweaty brow again. “Now let’s get you home while the getting is good, okay?”
He nodded weakly and I gave him one more kiss on his nose before straightening again to turn back to the duffle on the floor by the door. A thin whine rose up out of his throat and I looked back down at him, looking just as surprised as I that such a sound came out of him.
I reached out and ran a hand through his hair and his eyes fluttered shut again. Fuck this was bad. It was like all his senses were dialed up to eleven and even small touches were eliciting heightened responses. Lo said it could be days, both of us needing to be close by and somewhere safe to meet his needs. She guessed a minimum 36 hours, though it was hard to say with Steve’s metabolism, before he was out of the woods enough to leave him alone at all. He would need near constant touch and care to keep him from spiraling into a similar state.
“What do you need, sweetheart?” Bucky was dressed, had his boots back on, and had demolished the sport drink and sandwich with his usual proficiency.
I pointed at the bag. “There’s a light blanket in there. I’m not going to waste what time we have trying to get him dressed, we’ll just take him home wrapped like a big supersoldier burrito.”
Bucky chuckled as he followed my instruction, coming back with the dark gray, fuzzy throw blanket I kept on the lounge in the bedroom. He helped Steve up, and when he wobbled a bit on his feet, scooped the blond man up in a princess carry like Steve didn’t have a few inches on him and weigh at least as much. Steve looked indignant for a minute, but as his skin warmed in the blanket and Buck settled him comfortably in his arms, he relaxed, resting his head against Bucky’s.
“Nat should have the car pulled into the hangar. I’ll grab the duffle. I brought some food for Steve, too, hopefully that and cuddles from us both will help keep him stable long enough to get home without incident. I have a theory that sex isn’t the only thing that can keep the symptoms in check if the goal is dopamine, oxytocin and seratonin.”
He nodded and headed out. Lo brushed my leg as I picked up the duffle.
“You are handling it all very well, darling. Expertly, even. Almost as though you had seen such a thing before.”
“I have.” I settled the bag on my shoulder, cat plastered to my leg, and followed.
Bucky was getting Steve settled in the car when I caught up. I set the bag in the trunk and pulled out another sports drink and sandwich. Then I climbed in and directly into Steve’s lap. He was still half hard and a little sound escaped his chest as I settled over his thighs.
I gave him an understanding smile. “Hey, handsome.”
The quirk of his lips would have been adorably embarrassed if he hadn’t been such a mess, the waves of pain and confusion and shame washing past me. “Hey, darlin.”
Bucky settled in beside us, pressed into Steve’s side and gave Nat a signal. As the car pulled out of the hangar, I opened the sports drink and held it up to Steve’s lips. He took it eagerly, licking his lips as I pulled it away. “Slowly, Steve.”
“Sorry.”
“It’s okay.” I offered him the sandwich and he took a bite, then Bucky thumbed a bit of sauce from the corner of his mouth.
He’d finished both the sandwich and drink by the time we got home. And I could feel him hardening under me, and his skin going feverish, and his heart beating harder against my chest pressed to his as I draped myself around him.
Bucky leaned in, voice low against his ear. “Just a few more minutes, punk.” I felt the skip of his heart at the endearment. “Gonna take care of you.”
I nuzzled his sweaty face. He reeked of stress and sweat and blood and the musk of sex, the smell of clean linens and sunwashed sage lost underneath. I didn’t care. I stayed pressed to his body through the blanket and my clothes, giving him as much of my weight and body contact as I could in that position, my hands and face nuzzling and caressing him and let him feel my love for him, making his eyes flutter shut and his breath slow, holding him steady as the next wave built in him.
Nat parked and I kissed Steve’s brow. “We’re home. Buck is gonna take you upstairs to get cleaned up. I have a couple little things to take care of and then I’ll be up there, too, okay?”
Steve just nodded. I could feel the tide dragging him under. “Not a lot of time, Buck.” He just gave me a curt nod and started helping Steve out as I got out the other side and leaned on the window opening. “I’ll keep you posted, but don’t expect to hear from me for at least 48 hours. Could be before that, but don’t count on it.”
Nat gave my hand a squeeze. “You need anything…”
“I’ll reach out. Promise.” Then I smirked at her. “Even if it’s takeout.”
She smirked. “I’m not EatHubbing for you.”
“Jack will, though. And I know he will be at your place tonight.”
She rolled her eyes. “If you’d let me tie you up…”
“If you’d just admit you like tying him up more…”
“Whatever. Go take care of your ridiculous horny men.”
I leaned inside and kissed her forehead. “Love you, too.”
She shoved me out with a smirk. “Whatever, sap.”
I walked around to grab the duffle from the trunk and headed inside as she pulled away.
Jack met me at the door. “What happened?” I looked up to the second floor landing at the vanishing figure of Bucky carrying Steve. “Is Steve okay?”
“Nope, but Buck and I are going to take care of him. Long story, but I strongly suggest going to stay with your girlfriend. For the next several days. She can fill you in.”
He gave me a look.
I ignored that he was probably frowning at me for the girlfriend quip rather than the polite roomie warning. “I’m not kicking you out, but things are gonna be wild around here for a few days. Heads up.”
The look got more intense.
“Jack, this is me telling you shit’s gonna be wild. Lo, do you want to go back to the palace for a couple days?” Lo walked in behind me, weaved a quick figure eight between my legs with a little buzz of seiðr, and yowled at him before heading up the stairs.
He made a distasteful little noise. “I’ll grab my bag.”
“Smart man.” I leaned up and pecked his cheek on the way.
He gave me a smirk. “Should I get you a bottle of tequila?”
“Tell the abuelas to send tamales and I’ll make them proud.”
He gave a little shudder. “Right.” He headed upstairs too, and I made my way back to the kitchen.
I put a pot of coffee on the timer, grabbed a few packets of electrolyte water enhancer and some rations from the fridge and headed up on the lift. I emerged to the sounds of wanton moans coming from the bathroom. I put the things I'd brought upstairs into a little cooler I’d brought up earlier in anticipation of being up here for an extended period. Then I followed my ears toward the bathroom.