Work Text:
"Spidey! Where have you been?"
"SCREECH-SHRIEK-WHINNY-GRUNT-SCREAM!!^%$#"
"You were there?"
"SCREAM-SCREECH*&&^^"
Spidey makes a facepalm.
"I guess that means, "ARE YOU DUMB OR SOMETHING?"
Spidey hops up and down.
"I could use some advice."
"SCREECH-WHINNY-GRUNT-BARK-THWACK!!"
"Hey! Don't smack me!"
"PITCH-WHINNY-SREEECH^%%$"
"Okay, so the most beautiful woman on the planet - "
"THWACK!!!"
"The ONLY woman - "
"PITCH-WHINNY-THWACK@$$!!"
"How can I make her like me?"
Spidey burrows between her legs."
"SCREAMS-SCREAMS-SCREAMS-LONG-KEEN!!^%%$"
"I must have sex with her?"
"SCREECH-SHRIEK-SQUAWK-WHINNY-GRUNT-SCREAM!%^&&
"Just like that?"
Suddenly startled, Spidey skrieked before dashing off.
"Hey!!"
"Chakotay…"
He swung round.
Kathryn stood there.
Gloriously stark naked.
*
end