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He hobbles into Claire's apartment at 1am, bloody, bruised, and beat to hell. He stumbles to lay on her couch, small groans escaping his mouth on the way.
Soon enough, Claire walks out of her bedroom. "Ugh- Matt. It's too late for this." She mutters, but gets out her supplies anyway.
Her fingers caress his skin as she treats his wounds. His response is instant. His body is tinder and Claire's touch is a spark, so that's all it takes to ignite Matt in a fierce and all encompasing ecstasy. It's everything to him. He never wants it to end.
Knowing that he can just relax and let her deal with everything... It's all he has ever dreamed of. When he was a child people took care of him, because of course that's what adults do. But once he grew up, he found himself desperately craving to experience that sort of intense yet calming relationship again. One where the other party took charge of him, ensured he had no reponsibilities whatsoever, validated his every concern, held him and told him that he was doing great.
Before he found Claire, he sometimes cried, alone of course, from the sheer longing and desperation. Sometimes the pain felt like it could sprout limbs from his chest, reach up, and tear his face off in *want*.
He's tried to fulfill this want in other places. His friendship with Foggy isn't the same, though. They're close, they're business partners sure, but they're just not intimate in the way Matt's heart desires. A romantic relationship would come close, but the issue is that they always require equal input form both parties. In fact, In a few relationships, he found himself lapsing into a sorry state, demanding to be cared for. But they always left when they realized just how needy he could be, in absence of any obvious injuries or sickness.
Now though, his vilgilate injuries give him a justification. *Of course* he needs to be tended to, he's hurt after all. And Claire does, dutifully dressing his wound while he rests. A small part of him whines that it's only temporary, but he quiets it, content to indulge in the gentle but all encompasing love of a carer that made time cease to exist.
-
Of course, Claire's nursing couldn't last forever. They were both adults, and it was expected that once Matt healed, he would return to his status of being an independent adult.
The indulgence of that night satisfied him for a few days, until Matt's heart threatend to claw his face off again.
Which is why he finds himself standing in front of a group of thugs, mask on. The thugs' heartbeats indicate that there are just enough of them and that they are just athletic enough for Matt to win the altercation, albeit with serious injuries.
He charges them. They fight back, landing hits and slaps and punches that leave Matt bleeding and tingling. It hurts.
He considers it his punishment for being so needy and clingy to Claire.
A punishment that, although sublime, was unsuccesful as a behavioral deterrent. So, he stumbles into Claire's apartment again, ready to demand her love and attention.
He collapses onto her couch again.
She comes out of her room again.
Her gentle hands treat him again.
His desperation melts into an all encompasing satisfcation again.
And so the cycle repeats.
"Wow. Whoever did you fight today? They really did a number on you."
Matt's heart explodes like fireworks, each spark creating its own small burst, and again, and again, into a devouring constellation of shimmer. All because Claire showed she cared enough to ask. "Some guys who were walking around." He mutters.
"Were they doing something wrong?"
Matt is too delirious to provide a reasonable response. He replies absentmindedly. "Well... they seemed like they were going to."
Claire chuckles. "They just seemed like they were going to. You go around beating people up for no reason?"
Her words awaken the part of Matt that says, "be a responsible adult and stop engaging Claire in this toxic and unfair relationship, Matt." This vile creature takes control of his mouth.
"I wanted them to hurt me, Claire." The logical thing says, supressing Matt fighting for control.
Claire's hands still on his skin. Her voice is empty of emotion. "Why?"
"I wanted you." He says.
Claire untensed and continued her work. "Ha. You go around getting hurt just for me? You shouldn't do that, Matt."
*Run*, he thinks *Sticking around this monster in human skin will only hurt you*
In spite of himself, he relaxes when Claire doesn't take his rambling seriously.
"So, seriously, what were they doing? I know you wouldn't pick a fight for no reason."
Oh, she doesn't know him at all. It hurts, despite the fact that it was his choice to conceal his true self behind layers and layers of masks. "They were planning a crime. I overheard them." He lies.
She begins to skillfully stitch a large gash on this leg. "How big was the group? It's rare for you to be this beat up."
"Pretty big. Maybe about ten?" Matt desperately wishes for the conversation to move on. Maybe Claire could ask about how he felt, praise him, tell him he was doing great.
"And of course you had to pick a fight with them. Sometimes I wonder if you have any self preservation instinct at all."
It wasn't what he begged for, but at least Claire revealed that she thinks and worries about Matt's inner thoughts sometimes. Years of practice with hiding his overactive emotions keep sobs in. "They were up to no good. I had to."
"What were they planning exactly?"
Matt panics. He comes up with a suitable lie. "They were going to rob a store."
"What store requires ten people to rob?" Claire chuckles.
"A big one, I presume."
They lapse into a steady silence, with Claire treating his wounds. When she finishes, she stands up. "I think I'll head back to bed now What time is it?" She looks at the clock. "3am. I can't believe after securing myself a day shift, Im back to treating people at night."
Matt crumbles when he hears that, bits of him deteriorating in an instnat. Matt's desperation has hurt someone once again.
This snaps him into a moment of sobriety. That's is all it takes.
"Claire. I picked that fight."
She doesn't sound mad, not yet. "Why?"
"Because I needed someone- anyone- to nurse me."
Claire turns around. "So you went and got beat up. On purpose. So I would treat you." She doesn't sound angry, more disbelieving.
"Please, don't hang around me anymore. I'm horrible."
"You're self aware but you do it anyway." She sighs. "I don't even know what to say. So those guys were completely innocent"
"I-" He hesitates. "Yeah."
Her mouth opens and closes a few times.
"I am absolutely terrible, Claire. You should run. As fast as you can. Away from me."
"You aren't going to defend yourself. I can't even be angry."
Claire looks at him intently. "Are you sure you didn't get a concussion?"
"No, I promise that's not the case. Don't treat me again. You don't deserve to be near me."
Claire stands up. "Fine then. Leave tomorrow morning and don't come back, if that's what you want."