Chapter Text
“You should... Pay Yodo some attention too.”
The words hurt, more than they should have.
He isn't stupid, he could tell Yodo had been acting strangely around him for a while now, and the odd tension that Araya has picked up since.
“who's the hypocrite now?” he tries to keep his voice steady, “all you talk about is Yodo,” and that he has, almost every conversation they have had between the two of them over the past few months had slowly moved into the topic of the blonde girl.
People wouldn’t think him so perceptive with how little he talks to anyone in the village outside of his family and teammates, but when it came to them, he was careful to pay as much attention as possible, it was his way of showing them how much he cared for them.
He looked over to the side, watching Araya drift his sight down at Yodo, who was deep in conversation with the Kazekage and Kankuro, presumably about some new training technique. They have been so busy with training that the three of them haven't spoken to each other much lately, just quick conversation between breaks.
Even through his new form of a mask, a cloth tied around the upper part of the boy's face, he could tell what expression he was making underneath it, Araya had a very telling face, They had learned so after the first time they saw the others face in a training mishap, when he and Yodo didn't freak out at his scarred face Araya had become more comfortable choosing to not cover up his face.
“Shes not all I talk about,” he began again, not moving to face away from the sight of her below them, “Shes just... Been on my mind lately, but you should really talk to her Shinki, you have definitely noticed by now but” he pauses, taking a long breath, “she likes you.”
Looking over at Araya, his eyes still trained on the three below them but with a slight tension to his cheeks showing below his mask, which meant he was most likely squinting, a nervous habit he had noticed since seeing the boy without his face covered more often.
Glancing down and looking at Yodo as Araya was, she still hadn't noticed what was going on overhead and was still talking with his father and uncle. She was very pretty and had grown to be a very respected person in the sand village, even while just being a chunin, but he just couldn't see her that way, couldn't imagine seeing her that way.
He couldn’t remember when, but he had realized his feelings for Araya quite some time ago. His feelings for the other boy had always been different from those he had for friends and family.
Since the realization of these feelings, he has kept them quiet and has been careful to not change his demeanour around the other. He had zero intent to ever tell him though, feelings like these got in the way of being a ninja, this messed up love triangle had already gotten in the way of their recent missions and training sessions, and a confession from any of them would only do the team worse.
“I’ve noticed, and I won't lie to her for the sake of her crush on me, she is a trusted companion and a good friend to me, and that's all it will ever be,” he says calmly and goes to peak a look over at Araya to find himself face to face with him, apparently having stepped towards him as he was talking.
“So you’re just going to ignore her?!” he shouts, grabbing the front of his jacket.
How none of the three below them have noticed is a miracle.
“What do you want me to do?!” Shinki shouts back, voice cracking slightly.
Araya takes a step back at this, shocked. It is uncommon for Shinki to raise his voice, and rare for him to raise it at his team.
“You can't get mad at me for anything while you sit back here and try to push me to accept her just so you can accept that she doesn't like you,” he continues, tears welling in his eyes slightly, “so make sure your feelings don’t get in the way Araya, we don’t need any complications with a love triangle right now.” Shinki finishes, continuing to stare Araya down.
Just as Araya opens his mouth to respond a shout comes from down below.
“Hey! What are you two doing up there?”
They both jump slightly at Kankuro’s sudden voice, Shinki’s shouts must have alerted them to the commotion above.
Kankuro, Gaara and Yodo stand below, the two men looking with confusion at the two boys, but Yodo gives them a shocked look, she’d probably heard the last of what Shinki was saying as she turned her attention to them after Shinki raised his voice.
Shinki quickly looks down at his feet, his face twisting with embarrassment. He can feel Araya’s intense gaze on him, but he refuses to meet it.
Araya shifts uncomfortably, clearly unsettled by his teammates sudden outburst. “It’s not like that,” Araya mummers, his voice barely audible, as though trying to reassure Shinki, or himself. “I didn’t mean—“
“I know,” Shinki interrupts, though his voice is back to its normal monotone. “Just— forget this.”
The silence that follows is uncomfortable, beyond so. Neither of them speak as they look back down at the three people below them, still watching them, waiting for an explanation. Yodo stand stalk still as her face pales, obviously realizing what the topic of their conversation had been, Gaara watches them with his usual, stoic expression back on his face. Kankuro, on the other hand, seemed mildly amused, having seen his nephew shout for the first time in awhile.
“What’s goin’ on up there?” Kankuro calls out again, voice carrying through the wind.
“N-nothing! We will be right down!” Araya then shouts back, turning towards Shinki, “Let’s go, we can talk more later, yeah? We don’t need Yodo getting mad at us for skipping out on training” He spoke, keeping his face away from Shinki’s direction.
“You go on up ahead, I’m not feeling well enough to train today,” He replied, keeping his eyes trained on his feet, not daring to look up at Araya.
He felt Araya pause and consider questioning him, but inevitably Araya jumped down, over the makeshift sand railing, keeping his distance from Yodo, Shinki watched him tell his father and uncle that he wouldn’t be joining them as he’d told Araya that he wasn’t feeling well. This earned him another look from his family, ones of a little more concern then before but they didn’t say anything, only nodding their heads.
At this, Shinki turned back around and began walking back home.
The wind brushes against Shinki’s face as he walked home, each step heavy with the weight of unspoken words. His thoughts tangled in a knot mixed of confusion and regret.
He tried to keep his mind focused, walking the familiar path back to his house, willing his thoughts to silence themselves. The conversation replaying in his head instead. Araya’s words, Yodo’s face, his own outburst, words cracking slightly. He had never meant to get upset with Araya, it wasn’t his fault that Shinki couldn’t confront Yodo and explain why he couldn’t return her feelings.
As he reached his front door, he hesitated, his hand hovering over the handle. Part of him wanted to go and shut himself in his room and work on one of his puppets, not coming out until his father and uncle returned home.
But another part of him—somewhere deeper—felt a pull, a good, long walk in the desert would do him some good. A distraction from the mess he had just put himself in.
Shinki stood still for a moment, the weight of everything pressing down on him. He had acted out of frustration, out of something that he couldn’t put into words. Araya’s words, Yodo’s feelings—it all tangled up inside him.
He opened his door slowly and stepped out of the cool desert air. As he took of his shoes and made his way upstairs, to his room, having decided to work on his puppet, he let the familiar process of maintenance on his puppets swallow his thoughts, hoping the work would bring him some clarity.
But for now, there was no escaping the awkward situation his team was currently in.