Work Text:
Things were going great for Aran. He got his money back after his dad’s arrest. He bought back his old business, fired everyone and rebranded. His new designers kissed ass less, but they were definitely more reliable. His Livestreams always reached high numbers and people were starting to take his brand seriously in the endless sea of high-fashion. Some of the credit for his success should go to Tattoo, as he helped to combine a bit of technology in his designs, making them stand out among all the nepo-baby-owned Paris fashion replicas. Speaking of whom…
Being in love sucks. Being in a one-sided love sucks. Being in one-sided love with the world’s most oblivious men sucks. Being in one-sided love with a guy whose sexual orientation is a mystery to you despite literally having slept with him in the same bed sucks.
So, if you ignore the all-too-painful and all-too-embarrassing crush on Tattoo that seemed to grow stronger by the day, Aran was doing great.
“So who was the handsome guy you were on a date with?” Hoy asked.
“What guy?” Aran asked back.
“Hey, stop being coy. I saw you with some gym bro type in a restaurant a couple of days ago.”
Aran put his chopsticks down, trying to remember.
“Oh, you mean Apo? He is a model I want to work with. He is very popular. He’d triple my sales if I manage to get him to represent us.”
“That didn’t seem like a business negotiation, with candles and all,” Hoy continued.
“Ah, well,” replied Aran, pointing at his face, “I’m simply too gorgeous. He asked for a date in exchange for being the face of our new campaign. He wouldn’t sign otherwise. I had to make a sacrifice.”
“Oh, did you? It didn’t seem like much of a sacrifice. Just look at the guy, Tattoo,” said Hoy showing the others the picture he’d taken of the two.
Aran was in a see-through Dior shirt, leaning towards the spoon the model was holding. The model was a tall, muscular tan guy with the sweetest smile.
“So that’s why you ditched me the other day?” Tattoo asked, a bit annoyed.
“I was doing it for our new campaign. We’d make so much money with him.”
“And he is super hot,” added Hoy.
“He isn’t even that hot,” muttered Tattoo.
“Are you going to have another date?” asked Hoy, completely ignoring his remark.
“He did ask me, but I told him I’m busy.”
“Should have said yes, don’t you agree, Tattoo?” asked Hoy.
Tattoo looked at him for a second before replying.
“It’s not up to us to decide. Aran can date whoever he wants. I’m done,” he said, standing up and going to his workshop.
Aran stared at his retreating back, much to Hoy’s amusement.
“He is jealous, you know,” said Hoy.
“We used to sleep in the same bed for months. If he wanted anything, he’d have made a move a long time ago.”
“You know him. He might be a genius in robotics, but he is an absolute idiot when it comes to feelings. I don’t even think I’ve seen him dating anyone.”
“Maybe he just doesn’t want to. In any way, I’ve been obvious enough for the last year. I’m getting tired.”
“So you’ll give up? Go on dating that hot model of yours?”
“Why not? He is my type and it’s been a while. A beautiful flower like me is drying up because of your stupid friend. I can’t stay alone for too long in my prime,” Aran joked lightly.
To be honest, he had been thinking about giving up on Tattoo for quite some time, but never found the courage to do so. He had dated before, he had had crushes before, but never had he been so in love with anyone. And no one had been as attentive and sweet as Tattoo. He gave him a home to live when he was thrown out like garbage by everyone in his life. Tattoo never dismissed him or held a grudge for their complicated past. Even though he complained a lot, he was never cruel with him, never blamed him for his father’s mistakes, he never left him behind after using him.
In the last year, Tattoo was always there, right next to him. Always so reliable, always so trustworthy.
In short, Aran understood very well that he was long-past the crush zone, and he was actually in love with the man, a thought that had never been this scary. Tattoo was such a great guy, but he was also a complete ass. One day he’d lean on Aran’s shoulder to take a nap and make Aran’s heart race, the next moment he’d wake up and go work in his workshop like that was a normal thing he often did with his friends (and Aran knew it wasn’t). He never seemed to notice the effect he had on Aran. Every touch, every hug, every silent conversation made Aran weak in the knees, but Tattoo was always so unaffected. He always seemed to think of it as completely natural. A normal thing to do with a friend. It was killing Aran. He had to get over Tattoo before he was in his 60s still waiting on a man who never saw him as a potential partner.
Aran wasn’t that interested in dating the model. He was entirely too clean. Aran preferred men who looked like they worked in a garage, rough around the edges, taciturn, smart, like… However, Aran needed to do something about his feelings. Maybe he should dial the man in a few days.
After the usual Friday dinner was over, Aran left to sleep in his fancy apartment. He used to stay over, but there are so many “woke up clinging to Tattoo” moments he could survive before going crazy. Instead he went to his fancy but small apartment, drank white wine and went to sleep listening to Adele songs.
Tattoo didn’t come out to say goodbye when he heard Aran leaving. He never left his workshop once he entered it in the evenings. He claimed that he worked better in the evenings, but it was because he was too lazy to wash the dishes after himself, so usually he and Aran would go on working on a new design, while Hoy cleaned up.
As of now, he was disassembling a toy car. Not that he needed something, he just felt like doing something with his hands. He was kind of annoyed.
“Why are you sulking alone?” asked Hoy.
“I’m not sulking. I’m gonna turn this car into a mini-radio.”
“You know I’ve known you since childhood, right? You are sulking. I can even tell you the reason. It’s Aran’s date.”
“Why would it annoy me? Aran can sleep with whoever he wants. Are you saying I’m homophobic?”
“Not at all,” laughed Hoy, “I just think you are jealous.”
“I’m not jealous. I’m just annoyed he ditched me to go on some date.”
“So you are annoyed he spent time with another guy instead of you? Sounds like jealousy.”
“Spit out what you are trying to say and then leave me alone. I don’t have time for this.”
“Ok. I think, no, I know, you are annoyed because Aran might be dating someone, but don’t you worry my friend, you can easily get him if you actually ask him out.”
“What are you going on about? I don’t have feelings for Aran.”
“Do you even know what having feelings is like?” joked Hoy, “You’ve never dated for more than a few months. I doubt you know what love is supposed to be like.”
“I treat you and Aran the same way. Are you saying I’m in love with you too?”
“You literally don’t. If I ditch you to spend time with Miss Nang, you just hang up on me and go on with your day. Here you are sulking because I saw Aran on a date. You like him, definitely not in the same way as me.”
Tattoo finally stopped disassembling the toy. After a short pause, he looked out of the open window and said:
“It’s getting dark. You should head back to the temple.”
“Ugh, you are impossible to have a serious conversation with. Fine, stay playing with your toys, while the man who loves you goes on dates and forgets all about you.”
Hoy turned and left the room.
When Tattoo heard the door lock, he finally stood up, lit a cigarette and smoked by the window.
There was a polaroid stuck on the window. A selfie taken by Aran on the grand reopening of his boutique. He was so nervous. He kept pestering Tattoo on his costume for weeks, complaining how he didn’t wear the tie (Tattoo just wasn’t a tie guy. It went against all his beliefs.) In the picture Aran was leaning on his shoulder with a glass of champagne in his hand. He was smiling from ear to ear. He looked so beautiful.
The new campaign launch party was as noisy as ever. The elite of Bangkok fashion world was gathered here to gawk at the new line of the ex-nepobaby and his mysterious partner. A few of them had tried to find out who was behind the technology intertwined in the new designs, but no one had seen that person. Aran was the only one directly in contact with them. Some were even thinking Aran was behind it all, just trying to add some mystery to his brand. Others knew him well enough to laugh at the idea.
The mysterious partner was actually present. Just like always, he stood next to Aran in a fancy suit Aran had designed for him specifically. A gorgeous black velvet suit with silver chains on lapels. Just like always, most people assumed he was the bodyguard and didn’t talk to him, much to Tattoo’s joy. He hated talking to the people who had far too much money to be that stupid.
Usually Aran would introduce him to others mid-conversation as his friend, but today he was being weird. He had been weird that whole week. Barely replied to his messages, didn’t go to Tattoo’s for their usual dinner, kept his distance. Tattoo hadn’t had the chance to do anything wrong so whatever it was, it was all on Aran.
From the corner of his eye he saw a very tall gorgeous man approach Aran and hold him by the waist. He almost moved to go separate them, but he controlled himself in the end and stayed in the same spot with wine in his hand.
Aran didn’t seem to hate it, in fact, he was giggling and whispering something to the man. It must have been the model Aran was on a date with. He could see why Aran would date him. He looked good and he was dressed well too. One could easily tell they were from the same world.
Tattoo didn’t even realize he was staring so intently until Aran turned around and locked eyes with him. He jumped up a little and sipped from his drink, just to be doing something. Aran said something to the model and came to stand next to Tattoo.
“Why do you look so gloomy? You are in a 200,000$ suit designed by the hottest and most successful man in Bangkok.”
“Could have used that money on better things. I’d have killed to have that much money a year ago,” mumbled Tattoo.
“Oi, I do a lot of charity, okay? Ask Rose.”
Tattoo didn’t say anything.
Aran side-eyed him before coming to stand right in front of him.
“Seriously, what’s wrong? I know you hate these kinds of events, but you look downright annoyed. Do you want me to disclose your identity? Mind you, I’ve always wanted you to be in the limelight, you were the one who wanted to stay hidden. If that’s the problem, let’s do it now. It’ll add even more publicity to the event.”
“I don’t care about that.”
“Then what is it?”
“Are you dating the model?” Tattoo did not, in fact, mean to ask it out loud.
Aran was dumbfounded. He took a minute to reply.
“Why are you asking?”
“Just because.”
“And if we are?”
“Congratulations to the couple. Wish you the best,” said Tattoo sarcastically before drowning the wine and turning to leave the room.
Aran stood still trying to make sense of his behaviour.
Suddenly, Aran put his glass on the servant’s tray and ran after Tattoo.
He found Tattoo smoking on the balcony.
Aran practically ran towards him, grabbed his lapels and pushed him against the balcony wall with force.
“What is your fucking problem? You have the audacity to act jealous after I’ve been pathetically running after you for the last year? Who do you think you are?”
The cigarette fell from Tattoo’s hand. He gently grabbed Aran’s hands and pulled them off his suit. He stayed leaning on the wall.
“I’m not acting jealous.”
“Tattoo! Please… I’m tired of this,” Aran begged.
“Fine,” sighed Tattoo, “I’m sorry. You’re right. You can date whoever you want. I have no right to get annoyed.”
“But why are you annoyed?”
“You don’t know?” asked Tattoo, avoiding his eyes.
Aran ruffled his finely gelled hair in frustration.
“I’ve been running after you for such a long time. I stayed in touch with you, I suggested working together, I never dated and even slept with anyone else, and for what? I feel like such an idiot. All this time I kept telling myself you were just oblivious and you…” Aran said through the tears.
He was always the type to cry in frustration.
“I’m sorry.” Tattoo still wasn’t looking at him.
Aran cupped Tattoo’s face to catch his eyes. He wasn’t sure what emotion he was seeing in them.
“Tell me then, what is the reason? You don’t want me because of my dad? Because you still think of me as a spoiled asshole? Because I’m too annoying? Too excentric? Too bratty?”
“Of course not,” Tattoo replied quickly.
“Tattoo…” Aran begged again.
Damn him and his beautiful eyes. And the voice that can make Tattoo do literally anything to keep hearing it.
“I just… I am afraid. You deserve better. You’ve been through hell and managed to stand back up on your feet with practically no help. You are smart and talented and passionate and me? I’m a loser by birth. I’ve been a disappointment my whole life. I spent most of my life barely surviving and paying off debts. The only thing I’m good at is making stuff. I’ve let down my mum, my friends, hell even myself so many times I’ve lost count. Anyone with my brains could be making so much money, but I still live in a run-down apartment and I only have a job because you offered me one.”
“Tattoo, that’s not true! You have saved my life! Where would I be without you?”
“I just gave you a place to stay a year ago and only because all the others were pressuring me. And you were so broken at that time that a loser like me seemed like a hero to you. You support my stupid ideas, you believe in me and it’s become such a heavy burden on me. No one has ever believed in me that much, not even my mother. No one expects great things from me, except for you. And I’m scared that one day you’d open your eyes and see me for what I really am. You’d see that I’m just a lazy selfish ass who has no goals or ambition. You can do so much better. You deserve the best.”
Tattoo turned around to dry his tears. Aran didn’t know what shocked him more: the answer or the tears.
They stood in silence for a few minutes.
Suddenly, Tattoo felt a heavy slap on his head.
“You are a fucking idiot! The stupidest man alive! An imbecile!”
Aran stressed each sentence with a slap. Tattoo raised his arms in defence and finally turned around.
Aran didn’t stop and started to slap his abdomen, calling him all kinds of names.
Tattoo finally decided that he had enough and grabbed Aran’s wrists.
“Who do you think you are to decide for me? A selfish bastard is what you are!”
Tattoo didn’t reply.
“Listen to me carefully, Tattoo. You can’t make decisions for me. I’ve had enough of that from my dad. I will never let anyone force me into a corner. And as for all that, you are wrong. You are wrong for assuming I don’t know you. I know exactly who you are and I love you for it. Yeah, you are lazy and boring and all you ever want to do is to lie down and so what? I don’t mind it. I love lying down next to you doing nothing. I love that you are so relaxed, it makes me feel safe. I love making you roll your eyes and I love annoying you. It makes me so happy. I look forward to our Friday dinners because I can watch you disassemble stuff just to build something completely stupid out of it. Tattoo, I know you and I accept you for who you are just as you accept me for who I am. I’m very difficult to deal with, I’m spoiled, I’m demanding, but do you hate it?”
Tattoo shook his head.
“If you can accept me with all the annoying traits, then I can accept you too. If you let me.”
Tattoo didn’t move an inch, just stared deep into Aran’s eyes for a few minutes. Aran could practically see the gears turning in his head.
“I swear if you don’t say anything right now, I’m going to make out with Apo in front of every…”
Before he could finish his sentence, Tattoo was already kissing him.