Archive of Our Own

When Luke enters the studio, following Michael to one of the chairs where he sits down and puts the headphones on like he’s supposed to, he is in a rather good mood. He remembers just three months ago he would have died at the simple thought of flying to the UK.

But now, after 5 Seconds of Summer’s well-earned break, things are definitely different and Luke doesn’t mind travelling anymore as long as he gets cuddles from Michael and enough sleep.

You can see his body has recuperated from all the stress, too. Luke’s eyes are brighter than ever, shining like two sapphires as he glances at Michael, who looks adorably cuddly wearing a long-sleeved sweater with a kitten on it.

During the break he really got into the fans’ ‘kitten stuff’ as Ashton calls it, which basically means he blesses the world wearing clothes with cat prints or posts pictures of the fluffy little animals on Instagram.

Honestly, Luke loves seeing him that way. The days when Michael used to be depressed and broken seem to be long gone and happiness has taken over the recently blue- and short-haired boy, who smiles at Luke when he notices his gaze resting on him.

The younger boy returns the grin as his brain briefly recalls the fact that this is one of the first interviews they are doing after returning from their break. Truth be told, the appointment was made short-termly and the band was more than surprised when their manager came up to them and told them they had to fly to the UK. But they were all okay with it – and here they are now, at the BBC Radio 1 studios in London.

Soon Ashton and Calum have sat down beside their two bandmates and the woman managing the whole radio show gestures at the four Australian boys.

“There’s only about fifteen minutes of the previous show left, guys,” she tells them after turning her microphone on. “This interview is gonna be a casual one since we had to improvise, but Scott couldn’t come here today so we had to replace him.”

“That means we just have another person to talk to,” Calum figures loudly, receiving a nod from the lady.

“Yes, that’s the only point. Actually, you’ll be chatting with two guys, who are only a tad bit older than you. Actually, you may know them since I’m pretty sure you’re friends with Caspar Lee.”

“I am,” Ash confirms and Luke wonders if he’s heard the drummer speak even one proper sentence today. However, the 19-year-old knows his friend has a good reason to be a bit grumpy; he hasn’t seen his girlfriend Bryana in two weeks after all.

“So, who are those guys?” Calum asks in a slightly whiny yet curious voice and bounces up and down in his seat, behaving like a little child on Christmas’ Day. Luke silently chuckles and turns to face Michael again, receiving a loving grin from the older guy.

His heart flutters a little and he returns the smile, biting his lip ring slightly as he knows that usually drives people crazy – in a good way, though.

“They’re British YouTubers,” the woman answers and Luke can actually see her through a window pane of Plexiglas now, fiddling with some cables as she talks. “You’ll see; they should be here any minute.”

“I’m kinda excited,” Luke admits, having to lean over to reach his bandmates considering he is seated on the chair which is the furthest away from the door. “I mean; it’s been so long since our last interview here, hasn’t it?”

“It has indeed,” Michael agrees with a happy grin, playing with some of the new bracelets he got for Christmas, and Luke is glad to see that he’s also wearing the one his blonde bandmate bought him.

It’s easy to find it on his arm since it is very different from the others indeed, more colourful and with a beautiful yet abstract pattern.

Luke likes to think that it is always matching Michael’s hair as it has so many colours and also it can be all the happiness on a dark day. He doesn’t hope Mikey is going to be sad, though, surely not.

Luke is so lost in thought by now that he doesn’t notice the room being entered by two guys at first, his head only flicking up when Michael gently nudges his arm. A small, confused “what” escapes his lips as he blinks confusedly, trying to figure out what is going on.

“Look, Lukey, our hosts are here.” Apparently Michael has realized Luke’s confusion and informs him about the situation.

The younger boy sends him a grateful smile and turns his head towards the two guys who have just taken a seat opposite, smiling widely at the band, and Luke swears he has seen their faces before.

While he’s still trying to figure out what their names are Ashton suddenly exclaims: “Hey, hey, I know you! You are Dan Howell and Phil Lester.”

“We are indeed,” one of the men confirms with a wide smile and his eyes, which are just as bright and blue as Luke’s, the singer notices, are observing the band curiously and finally turning to Ash again. “And you are 5 Seconds of Summer.”

A small giggle escapes the drummer’s lips as he nods at the man and Luke realises there’s no awkward tension in the room at all. If he had said something like the host just did, everyone would have died because of the awkwardness.

Luke’s gaze wanders around, leaving the first black-haired man and moving on to the other guy, who hasn’t said anything yet. He just stands in front of his mic, headphones around his neck, and listens whilst slowly pushing back his brown fringe from his face. His earlobes are pierced by two small black plugs, similar to the button-like ones Michael is wearing today.

The man’s facial expression doesn’t give anything away of his thoughts or feelings – albeit a little curiosity, but neither anything Luke would consider good nor anything bad. Suddenly a small smile tugs at the lad’s lips when Ash starts to explain where he knows the hosts’ names from, but Luke is not paying attention at all.

He’s busy watching the second guy, whose name is either Dan or Phil. Brown eyes, Luke notices, defining the shade of colour as chocolatey. The nuance is a little darker than the tone of Calum’s eyes, which reminds Luke of a mixture between coffee and caramel, but not nearly dark enough to consider it black like the man’s clothes.

With a chuckle Luke notices that the only colour the guy wears seems to be black indeed. The blonde wonders if he should ask him to show his socks, which may be of another shade, later –the fans would surely be entertained.

“Ehh, Lukey?” someone suddenly whispers near Luke’s head, causing the boy to flinch in surprise and stutter: “w-what?”

“Shhh, it’s just me,” Michael murmurs and glances at Calum beside him, who is now talking to the blue-eyed guy with glowing eyes. “You just seemed kinda lost in thought.”

“And that’s a good reason to startle me to death?” Luke teases quietly and smirks, which causes Michael’s green eyes to widen because he rarely does things like that.

“Don’t you dare be rude, Lucas!” the older boy nonetheless replies with a slight smile. “What were you thinking of?”

“I just looked at the second host,” Luke responds truthfully and nods at the man in black. “That one. Do you know which one he is out of the two?”

“I figured he must be Dan,” Michael says and Luke feels his fingers lightly brush against his head underneath the table. “Did you notice he has a dimple?”

“Oh, just like me?” Luke smiles in surprise, absent-mindedly raising a hand to touch his own cheek where his dimple is. Michael chuckles a little, gripping his arm and gently putting it back on the cold tabletop. “Just like you.”

“…so you know Caspar Lee,” the other host suddenly interrupts Luke’s and Michael’s little conversations and the two boys’ gazes shoot back to him as the man grins happily and scribbles on a sheet of paper with a pen. Luke has to admit his smile is pretty adorable and it kind of reminds him of Ashton’s because it just lights up the room as much as the drummer’s laugh could.

Furthermore it makes the guy’s, Phil’s, eyes sparkle like they’re two pools of water in the glistening sun and at the look on his face a warm and fuzzy feeling instantly settles in Luke’s chest, like his day has just been brightened, which it has indeed.

The blonde boy is so fascinated by the first host now that he almost doesn’t notice the small smile on the other anchor man’s lips that soon turns into a full, wide grin, an expression which Luke just knows all-too-well from looking at Michael. The older boy was actually right; the probably-Dan-guy has a dimple, which is now showing off as he laughs.

“Luke, Luke,” Michael suddenly interrupts his thoughts for the second time, causing Luke to shoot a glare at him.

“What?” the dark-blue-haired boy replies with an innocent smile. “You were looking at them like they were mythical creatures.”

“Oh, really? Isn’t that your title due to your habit of disappearing in your mancave for months and only emerging when the tour starts?”

Michael chuckles, which is probably the most adorable sound ever, although he claims Luke sniggering is much cuter, but anyway… “I’m like a very, very rare kind of Pokémon you can only catch going on stage.”

He pauses to nudge Luke’s shoulder with his head. “And also you of all people should know that I’m certainly not invisible during breaks since we basically spend every moment we can get together.”

“Shut up, Mikey!”

“Fuck you, that’s my phrase, Hemmings!”

“Stop calling me that,” Luke pouts.

“Aaww, little Lukey doesn’t like it, does he?”

“Fuck you, Michael!”

“More like fucking you, Luke!”

“But-“

“Dafuq, guys!” suddenly Calum’s hiss cuts Luke off and the blonde turns to his friend, who glares at him and Michael with knitted brows. “Quit flirting for a sec, for fuck’s sake!”

“We weren’t flirting,” Michael states matter-of-factly, not showing any regrets. “I was just telling Luke the truth. You can’t hold that against me.”

“Yes, I can, and now shut the fuck up, Clifford; we’re on in like 3 minutes?”

“What?!” Luke gasps, surprised, and straightens his back, finally paying attention to the hosts’ and Ashton’s conversation. They seem to be discussing something they have in common, but Luke doesn’t know what it is and he doesn’t get the chance to find out, either, because suddenly the technician woman interrupts them again.

“I’m sorry to cut you off, boys, but you’re almost on. Dan and Phil, would you please explain to our guests what you’re gonna do.”

“Of course, we’re not gonna leave clueless them like that,” Dan nods and Luke realises it’s the first time he hears the tall boy talk. The blonde has to admit he kind of likes the sound of his voice and especially how he pronounces the words, very different from the way Luke himself does, but still clearly understandable.

“So, there are a few things you gotta know. Firstly, I have to remind you that we are on camera, which basically means we are going to be doing challenges and stuff whilst playing music for those who are only listening.

People can watch us in a livestream on the BBC Radio 1 website.”

“This may be a lot different from what you do here normally,” the Phil-guy adds. “We usually only host shows once a month and additionally present some other events, but since we were short-termly asked to come here today we didn’t have time to change the concept of our show to make it more like an actual interview.”

“So basically this will appeal more to the younger crowd out there,” Dan ends the talk and smiles. “I hope you’re okay with that.”

“Sounds great!” Ashton smiles brightly and Luke notices his mood seems to have improved a lot since they got here.

“Well, then I guess we’re ready!” Phil gives thumbs-up to the lady behind the Plexiglas and she nods at him, showing five fingers. As she slowly counts down Luke straightens his back and runs his hand through his fringe one last time.

Not having his hair combed up in a quiff is quite new to him and it feels weird, but apparently management figured he needed a new hair style and so here he is.

“You look perfect,” Michael sweetly reassures Luke with a gentle whisper in his ear, causing a shiver to run down the younger boy’s spine.

“You too,” he replies with a shy smile, getting all flustered at the compliment. “You look gorgeous, Michael.”

“Thanks,” his bandmate grins widely. “But we’ll need to shut up; we’re on any second now.” With a wink he adds: “I’m romantically going to call you dude.”

“Love you, too,” Luke hisses and turns away with a smile still gracing his lips.

“And we’re on,” Phil says in this exact moment, smiling happily at the spot where the camera is. “Hello and welcome to your next hour with BBC Radio 1,” the host speaks into the microphone, bending forward slightly as the gaze of his colleague is resting on him. “You may be slightly surprised to hear my voice here right now, but unfortunately Scott needed to be replaced so Dan and I slipped in.”

“And this time we’re not even alone,” Dan adds, nodding at the band sitting opposite him. “We are joined by four guys from Australia we are going to talk with today. They are one of the main newcomers of the last two and experts expect them to become one of the biggest rock acts in the world soon.”

“And, well, you may have heard of them, too,” Phil steps in, “since their songs are played on BBC on a daily basis. So here we are with 5 Seconds of Summer!”

“We never actually introduced ourselves, did we?” Dan gives his guests a questioning look and Luke nods at him since he can’t remember anything like that.

His awkward mind immediately wonders what he’d do if Dan was actually Phil and Phil Dan. It would be so embarrassing, even if he didn’t say their names to anybody besides Michael, but still…

The pure thought of it makes Luke want to cringe, but he keeps himself from grimacing with all his might and focuses on Ashton instead, who giggles again. “I don’t think so, actually, no.”

“Oh, how rude of us!” Phil laughs and jokingly stretches out his hand. “I am Phil Lester, a 29-year-old YouTuber and part-time radio host.”

“And I’m Dan Howell,” Dan says. “I have the pleasure to live and work with him. Just so you know, we are two weirdos who live in a country called internet and have no actual friends.”

“We never go outside also.”

Luke lets out a little breath of relief at the moment Phil introduces himself and feels a little more relaxed afterwards, even though he’s still his overly awkward self.

“God, you’re basically me!” Michael suddenly exclaims in an excited voice. “I NEVER leave the house if I don’t have to. Luke can reassure you.”

“All he does is play COD and watch countless anime series. I know his habits because we live together,” Luke confirms with an amused grin, knowing the fanbase will probably freak out after what he’s just said.

“By the way, for those who don’t know, I am Luke Hemmings and I play guitar and sing.”

“He’s a little piece of shit,” Michael laughs. “Just so you know. I am Michael Clifford and I am surely the better guitarist in this band.”

“Are you kidding me, Michael?” Luke counters. “You know who the fans freak out over, don’t you?” Smiling, he leans back, enjoying the one thing he rarely does – fighting back.

“Shut up, Luke!” Michael hisses, reminding them all of the long gone days, when Calum says: “Quit it, Clifford. They don’t wanna hear the pointless stuff that’s coming out of your mouth. And I’m Calum, who surely knows that Michael Clifford is a whiny little shit. I play the bass.”

“You’re a dic-“ Michael starts to reply, but is cut off by Ashton, who shakes his head and turns to Dan and Phil.

“How the heck am I in a band with those idiots? Anyway, guys, let’s pretend you all love each other. I am Ashton and I kinda have a passion for the drums.”

“Alright, now that we all know who we are we can probably move on to the actual interview,” Dan says. “Though I’d love to discuss anime with you, Michael. What’s your opinion on it?”

“We definitely should discuss this wonderful thing,” Michael smiles. “How about we go get some coffee later?” “Sounds great!” Dan smiles and of course Calum enters the conversation again.

“Michael, stop asking random guys to go on a date with you,” he teases. “You’re just jealous,” his bandmate states matter-of-factly. “I would never date you in a million years.”

And now you quoted One Direction, Luke silently thinks to himself. Congratulations.

As he listens to the banter of his two bandmates his eyes are resting on the table; he’s wondering why he never manages to take part in conversations like this.

However, being the quiet one again doesn’t bother him that much after all. Maybe that’s just the way he is – a silent person, who doesn’t have a lot to tell strangers. Apparently, he needs a particular person to open up to…

And that’s how the next hour passes by. Luke is mostly quiet, paying attention to Dan and Phil’s questions nonetheless and taking part in the little challenges they do while songs are playing on the radio.

Luke finds he actually likes the two hosts. They are claiming they are ‘weirdos’, but that wouldn’t be anything new to him since he defines himself as one of that kind.

During the last hour he has also noticed a lot of little things about Dan and Phil. First of all, they both seem really smart and are very articulate; especially Dan is overly eloquent and Luke starts to get a little jealous of his ability to form a beautiful-sounding, straight sentence with his mouth.

The singer himself is not that lucky – he is never good when it comes to words, unless he talks to that one particular person in a room where they are alone…

Anyway, a striking thing about Phil is his constant happiness. In some way he’s just like Ashton and can make everyone smile with a simple sentence, but then again he seems a lot calmer than the overly lively drummer.

At some point Luke begins to wonder how someone can be so self-confident without acting like a jock, but apparently Phil has found out how it works.

However, Dan is the complete opposite his colleague when it comes to the topic of self-consciousness. Although he’s playing the overly sarcastic guy with a dry humour, but sometime in the middle of the conversation Luke can just tell he struggles a lot more than Phil.

The way he sometimes glances at the other guy, seeming to look for reassurance or encouragement, anything that shows he’s being supported, gives away Dan is not nearly as self-aware as he pretends to be. Something familiar.

But apart from that he’s really entertaining and Luke can relate to him a lot. The singer mentally takes a note to check out his videos as soon as he can fit it in his daily schedule.

However, there’s one thing about Dan and Phil that Luke doesn’t get and it’s also the first question he asks Michael when they finally get a fifteen minute break of their interview to go to the bathroom and get some drinks.

“Are they together?” Luke hisses as soon as he has exited the room, grabbing Michael’s wrist and tugging at him to find a more private area of the building. Soon they are in a lonely hallway somewhere near the music editorial office, standing across from each other and leaning against each of the walls.

“What did you say?” Michael asks after a little while of silence between them. He crosses his arms in front of his chest and gives Luke a small smile, eyeing him as he replies: “Dan and Phil. Are they together?”

“Uhm…” At first the guitarist seems unsure what to answer and Luke frowns because moments when Michael is speechless are very rare, but then the blue-haired boy clears his throat. “I’m not sure. What do you think?”

Luke shrugs. “I don’t know. That’s why I asked you… They kinda seem…in love.”

“You’re right,” Michael agrees and gets a few inches closer. His bandmate still stands there with his back pressed against the wall, smiling when he catches the older guy’s green gaze.

“They look at each other a lot,” Michael continues in a softer, quieter voice now as his hand brushes against Luke’s. “They look at each other the way I wish I could look at you.”

“So you think they are…” Luke mumbles, looking at the other guy with glimmering blue eyes.

“As I said, I’m not sure… Maybe they are together. Maybe they are in love with each other and don’t know it yet. Maybe they are just the best friends the world has ever seen. But they sure as hell like each other a lot.

We don’t know enough about them to be able to say anything about their relationship. But I bet their fans ship them just as much as they ship us.”

“They ship you with Calum,” Luke reminds his bandmate with a slight smile, trying to fight the urge to get closer to Michael, to overcome those last inches and let his body be embraced by two pale arms.

“Bullshit,” the other guy snorts and rolls his eyes as amusement flares up in his gaze. For a moment Luke is caught up staring at him, admiring the unusual yet beautiful colour of his eyes.

The blonde loves how they are green and yet never cold or dark – it’s more of a grass-green shade with a tint of yellow maybe, although Michael definitely doesn’t look like an evil vampire.

The colour of his eyes rather represents a warm day at the beginning of spring, sprouting sensitive little flowers, precious blossoms and buds, the first glimpses of a sun that’s going to warm them during summer.

Luke looks down when Michaels’ and his hands meet again, his fingers carefully being led back and pressed against the cold wall. The 19-year-old’s skin is not particularly tanned, but beside Michael porcelain white fingers his own seem darker than they actually are.

“Hey, you still there?” the older boy suddenly interrupts him and Luke’s gaze flicks up, catching Michael’s eyes in a second.

“Huh?”

The older guy chuckles quietly and his eyes light up a little when he replies: “You kinda have the ability to get totally lost in thought, no matter where we are.”

“Do I really?”

“Yes, you do. But don’t worry; I think it’s really cute?”

“You think it’s cute that I never say anything and don’t like talking to strangers?”

“Not exactly. I think it’s cute because I know you like talking to me and that makes me feel special. I feel like it’s proof for…us, even on days when we never even get to look each other in the eye.”

“Is anyone there at all?” Luke jokes when his mind recalls the lyrics of The Girl Who Cried Wolf and he can’t help but smile a little at the memory of the day they wrote it together with John.

Then he takes a deep breath, being completely serious again. “You wanna know why I want to know what the two guys are?”

“’Course, are you gonna tell me?”

“I guess so. I mean, it’s not a big thing, but…when I look at them I feel like I…” Luke tries to swallow the growing lump in his throat. “I feel like they have everything we’re missing out on. You know, as you said – the way they can look at each other when we can’t. They seem free.

There’s no one controlling them. Whether there are friends or more they still have more than we do and I’m afraid that’s never going to change.”

“I know what you mean, I get it, I really do,” Michael quietly says and clears his throat. He is so close to Luke now that the younger boy can feel his body warmth around him. “Do you think I can hug you right here?” Michael adds with a sad look in his eyes that reminds Luke of the days that are long gone.

“Y-yeah,” he whispers, “yeah, even if anyone sees it, I want you to hug me right now. Please, I wanna be close to you.”

“You’ll soon be closer,” Michael sweetly mumbles near Luke’s ear. “I promise you’ll be as close as you can get.” Then he slowly opens his arms to embrace Luke in a tight hug and the blonde has to fight the feeling of his knees giving in.

Suddenly his legs are wobbly and he feels his heart racing faster even though the only thing Michael does is hold onto him as if he was never going to let go. The blue-haired boy’s nose is pressed against his cheek and Michael’s chest is rising and falling against Luke’s.

Ten minutes later both of them take a seat in the studio again, soon being joined by Calum and Ashton plus the two hosts. Phil seems to be in an even brighter mood than before and welcomes them all with a smile reaching from his right ear to the left one.

“Hello, beautiful and weird humans, we are back!” Dan opens the second half of the show as soon as they are on again. “Here’s another 30 minutes of us and the guys from 5 Seconds of Summer. Seems like we did quite a good jobs so far, doesn’t it?”

“Totally!” Ashton agrees with a giggle. “You know what? I checked the tweets and apparently the people of the UK are going crazy. They seem to like you two more, though.”

“That’s outrageous!” Michael jokes and grins at the camera in front of them. “Too bad me and Dan didn’t have time for our coffee date during the break.”

“Hey, we can make up for it later,” Dan laughs. “Before that happens we’ll have to challenge you guys, though.”

“Because it’s time for…” Phil adds in a deep voice and Luke chuckles as the black-haired guy tries his best to look like a mysterious person.

Suddenly Dan excitedly exclaims: “Do the voice, do the voice Phil!”

His colleague laughs quietly and gives him a small nod before turning to the band in front of him. “Well, it’s time for…the Seven Second Challenge?”

A frown forms on Luke’s face as he tries to figure out what exactly the host just said when Dan steps in: “Care to explain what the Seven Second Challenge is exactly, Phil?”

“Of course. Well, basically you have seven seconds to do things you get told. Some people have written them down for us and we’ll read them to each other. Normally it’s Dan vs. Phil, but today I guess it would be more interesting if we played against each other. 5 Seconds of Summer vs. Dan and Phil.”

“But how do we know you don’t cheat?” Ash asks and raises his eyebrow as Michael adds: “You both seem pretty suspicious to me.”

Phil’s refreshing laugh fills the studio and Luke can’t help but silently chuckle along when Dan explains: “Don’t worry, we got here fifteen minutes later than you. We basically rushed here straight from our beds.”

“Relatable,” Michael says and Luke feels him nudge his arm underneath the table. “That could be me.”

“Agreed,” the younger boy smiles. “I basically have to pull him out of his room every noon.”

“Well, Lukey, you kinda forgot to mention that you are with me in that room usually,” Michael whispers near his ear when Dan and Phil turn to answer Calum’s question about the upcoming challenge.

Ten seconds later everyone is ready and a lady walks in, handing Ashton and Dan each a sheet with short instructing sentences written on it.

“Hey, hey, let me see!” Luke pleads and bends over to take a look at the exercises Dan and Phil will have to do. He smiles a little at the fourth one which says “name the members of 5 Seconds of Summer with first and last name in alphabetical order.”

“This one is going to be awkward,” Michael remarks as well, pointing at the challenge and Ashton and Calum nod in agreement.

“So who wants to starts?” Dan asks and Phil quickly adds: “I think we should go first to demonstrate how it goes.”

“Well, you better nail this one,” his possible lover says in the sarcastic tone Luke has got used to by now.

“Alright, I’ll read it out.” Ash lets out an excited giggle before he narrows his eyes and says: “Well, dear Dan, dear Phil, one of you will have to make up the weather report in an over-dramatic voice. Go!”

The hosts glance at each other, probably wordlessly deciding who’s going to do the challenge before Phil begins to speak.

“Uhm… Today it’s very sunny outside today, but remember one day this bright sun is going to spread and devour our beautiful earth. There are some clouds in the area of London and these friendly little things could cause a hurricane in America tomorrow, so…”

Suddenly there is a ringing voice and Phil stops talking in a voice that just sounds like someone just died. Luke chuckles a little and eyes Michael who slowly applauds, a grin spread on his face as everyone can admire his white, straight teeth.

“I guess you nailed it!” Calum says enthusiastically and gives the two hosts a thumbs-up. “I almost believed in your words!”

“Wait, wait, here comes the ding!” Dan announces presses a little button.

Still smiling, Luke shakes his head at the dorkiness of the two hosts while Phil admits: “I don’t even know what I just said. Was that even physically correct?”

“Probably not,” Ash decides. “So what’s our challenge?”

“We got it here,” Dan answers. “By the way, I forgot to mention that the winner gets to play a song of their choice. I mean, you can play anything you like. Anything.”

“Uh, I already know what certain people are gonna pick,” Michael chuckles and shoots a quick glance at Luke, who immediately feels the blood rise up his head and a faint blush coat his cheeks. Of course that had to come.

“Well, you haven’t won yet, so you better shut up,” Dan says and nods at the band. “Are you ready?”

“Ready,” Calum confirms, looking at the camera with a deadly serious expression on his face.

“Alright. Listen closely, boys: You’ll have to…name three people who have met Queen.”

What?, Luke’s brain seems to scream when he looks around frantically, hoping for someone to take over the challenge. He has already forgotten half of the question and his mind doesn’t seem to work anymore.

He has never been good at working under pressure or at least working like this. Luckily, Ashton, being his spontaneous self, quickly opens his mouth.

“The premier minister of the UK…David Cameron. Barrack Obama. And…fuck. One Direction!” With a satisfied grin the curly-haired guy steps back just before the high-pitched noise rings out again and Dan presses the button.

“Well, that was obviously your ding,” he laughs while Calum slaps Ashton’s arm.

“You could have just said her relatives, mate!”

“Well, at least I did the challenge,” the drummer sassily replies. “Beat that, Hood.”

“Well, next one for you two,” Michael steps in, surprisingly being the one to tell his bandmates to get their things sorted out so they can go on with the game.

Luke glances at his boyfriend’s smiling profile and gets the impression that Michael may actually enjoy this challenge – or the interview at all – a whole lot. And, truth be told, it’s quite hard to not appreciate Dan and Phil, who are both particularly funny, partly sassy and very kind guys.

“So, what’s our challenge?” Dan asks with a smirk and flinches a little right afterwards. It almost seems like Phil has hit him under the table or anything, just like Michael uses to.

“This one’s nice,” the blue-haired boy points out. “You have to make up a movie which Leonardo DiCaprio gets an Oscar for. And you have to explain the plot. Go!”

This time it is Dan’s turn and he doesn’t waste any time, going right for it. “Well, its name is The Day When…Chicken Landed On Mars and it’s basically a movie about worms that suddenly taste like carrots.

The chicken don’t like that much so they fly to Mars to search for better worms. And, bloody hell…L-Leo…plays habitant of the Mars who cursed the worms in the first place.”

“Wow, that is a story!” Phil exclaims when his colleague is finished. “I can totally imagine it!”

“I’d pay to watch it!” Michael agrees and Luke lets out a small giggle, remembering his boyfriend’s unconditional love for movies with a crazy plotline.

“No, but really, someone should make that a thing!” Phil says. “I think it’s something our audience would quite enjoy.”

“Anyway, moving on. Here we have the next challenge for you, guys!” Dan waves the paper which the challenges are written on and sassily adds: “I bet you’re going to fail this one!”

“We’ll see,” Ashton smiles, kind as always. “By the way, am I allowed to go again? Like, if nobody says anything, am I allowed to take over?”

“I guess so,” Phil shrugs. “That’s actually not in the rules, but let’s just pretend it is legitimated.”

“Well, here we go. You have to create a kind of sweet, imaginarily of course, and describe it to us. Also you need to tell us why it’s going to be the ultimate sweet of the future. Go now!”

The studio is filled with silence after Dan’s words. Luke doesn’t even have to look around to know that his bandmates are completely out of ideas. They used to eat a lot of unhealthy food and snacks, but ever since the band-thing got so serious they stopped doing that. They even have someone to control their nutrition, which is why Luke only gets to eat what he wants when he’s at home.

We are going to lose, we are going to lose, we are going to lose!, a small voice on the back of his mind keeps telling him and Luke is about to believe it when suddenly an idea slips into his head.

And, surprise, surprise, it’s kind of Michael who made him think of it. Luke blushes a little when he opens his mouth to hastily speak up, rushing the words until his speech is barely understandable.

“Uhm… It’s the Green, c-worm-flavoured, b-ball-shaped candy of rainbows. It’s basically like the things they already have, but it tastes like worms – see what I did there – because chickens won’t be the only ones who like the taste of worms in the future.

The things have like a little stalk, though, a little like a whisk but still ball-shaped? Does that make sense? And it’s going to be the hot shit because-“

“Ding,” the ringing sound interrupts Luke harshly, but the blonde boy tries to care neither about the noise nor about the incredulous facial expressions his bandmates are wearing and just keeps going.

“…because everyone likes balls, don’t they?” he finishes off and takes a step back from the mic, his cheeks glowing bright red as Dan breaks into laughter.

“Oh my god, Jesus Christ on a frickin bicycle,” he almost cries, “Whisks! It’s so gold, someone needs to make this, like literally…”

The last sentence is just an incoherent mumble to Luke, who doesn’t understand anything due to not being used to the hosts accent. He just stands there, face heated and hands buried in his pockets, as he watches the whole studio react to what he just said.

Everyone seems to be at least slightly laughing and it’s nothing he enjoys. Usually he would be proud of saying something people actually find funny, however, now it just seems like they are laughing at him.

Everyone likes balls, don’t they? The sentence keeps echoing in Luke’s head as his mind decides to torture him even more.

Did I really just say that? The internet will take that as a coming-out, that’s for sure. God, I’m not even ready for this, I signed a contract I wasn’t going to admit it for another year, they’re going to kick me out of the band…

Luke only realises that Michael has been poking him and trying to get his attention for quite a few moments when he feels a finger digging deeply into his side, a faint pain clutching his body.

“Luuukeee,” Michael quietly whines while Dan is still busy pointing out how brilliant Luke’s worm-flavoured, ball-shaped sweet is. “Stop worrying so much, baby.”

“How do you know I’m worrying?” Luke responds, his voice barely more than a whisper.

“C’mon, Lucas, I’ve known you for a long time, haven’t I? I can practically see the thoughts spinning behind your frowning forehead.”

“You can’t blame me, I basically just outed myself.”

“So what? You can easily deny that if anyone asks, which I highly doubt by the way. Relax, Luke, you just saved us.”

“It’s just a game,” Luke mumbles, but he can’t hold back a smile, already feeling better after Michael’s words.

“Congratulations, Luke; that was a well-earned ding!” Phil exclaims and presses the button for the third time.

“It was nothing,” Luke blushes, even though he can barely take a little thing like that for a compliment. Anyway, now he is a little proud of himself indeed. He won the challenge after all.

“Well, let’s see what your challenge is going to be,” Calum grins after high-fiving Ashton and Luke, giving a Luke an approving nod since he can’t quite reach him. The dark-haired Kiwi boy takes a look at the sheet.

“Hmh… So, you have to spell a name backwards. However, it’s going to be the name of your idol. Go!”

Luke can almost hear the clock ticking, even though there’s no sound at all, but he also recognizes the familiar helplessness on Dan’s and Phil’s faces. The two hosts stare at each other like they are not sure what to say.

Then, after a silence of at least two seconds, Dan hesitantly starts: “Uh… Hell, T-S-E-W-Y…fuck, what was it again?! Stop- E-Y-N…”

As soon as the ringing noise rings out Ashton’s excited screams fill the studio and Luke knows the drummer has probably broken the soundbar by now. He himself can’t help but smile either, though.

To the sound of Calum exclaiming: “You’re out of time, you’re out of time!” and Ash dancing around in front of the camera, laughing his ass off, he raises his hand and Michael high-fives it, holding on to his fingers for a moment before hesitantly letting go.

“We won!” the blue-haired boy teases Dan and Phil, who look at each other with frustrated yet sheepish expressions on their faces.

“Oh my god, Dan, I can’t believe you actually misspelled Kanye West’s name!” the black-haired and slightly smaller host says and Dan shakes his head, a smile cracking his lips open.

“I can’t believe I actually went for Kanye. I should’ve spelled your name since I’m Phil trash #1.”

As soon as the words have left Dan’s mouth Luke feels Michael not-so-discretely nudge his arm, mouthing a ‘they are together for sure’ when the younger boy glances at him.

“Seems like you’ve won the challenge,” Phil remarks with a nod toward the four bandmembers. “So what are you going to play?”

“Well,” Ashton starts, straightening his back as he jokingly pretends to be making a serious speech. “It’s a great honour to win this challenge, I must say. I’d like to thank my fellow bandmates for supporting and helping me achieve this triumph. Also I’d like to thank my family at home who always gives me a great time and a certain girl who is probably in LA right now.

Lastly, a special thanks goes to the fans for being awesome and One Direction for meeting the Queen.

I’d love to decide which song we are going to play, but as we all agree on the fact that Luke’s candy was just amazing, I’m sure it’s his decision.”

“Me?” Luke asks for reassurance while he almost feels Michael’s mocking gaze burn his skin. Turning and seeing his boyfriend smirk around doesn’t do anything good either and Luke is more than relieved when Calum takes the pressure off him.

“Yes, you are in control.”

“Oh, thank you.” He doesn’t even have to think about it. It’s obvious what he’s going to play or at least obvious to Michael and him. How could he resist if it was their jam, their anthem during the break?

“Well, there is this song I listened a lot to while we were on break. I’m sure it annoyed the hell outta Michael…?” Luke sends his bandmate a questioning look and the 20-year-old chuckles.

“Actually, it’s probably the best thing that’s ever been made.”

“Agreed. Anyway, I just think it’s a masterpiece of music and the band that made it is pretty cool as well, so check them out.” Pretty decent. Massive understatement. Fucking perfect. “Fuck, I’m rambling. So, I’m gonna play In The End by Black Veil Brides because the song is just fucking beautiful.”

“So In The End it is,” Phil smiles and takes his headphones off just as the song starts. Luke hums along to the familiar melody as his body visibly starts to relax. Well, a little too soon as it seems, considering the smirk on Michael’s face when he turns to the mic.

“I think at this point we should probably mention that Luke’s guilty pleasure is Andy Biersack.”

Fuck you, Michael, Luke thinks to himself when he suddenly feels four pairs of eyes staring at him directly, his cheeks heating up again, if his blush even went away after the last time Michael did something to him.

“Relatable,” Dan fortunately says with a smile. “I mean, I’m starting to think I may like Kanye a little too much… But anyway, the audience can’t hear us right now. We are just being filmed, but without audio.”

A sigh escapes Luke when he smiles at the camera, now aware that the fans probably didn’t hear what Michael just said. Having a crush on the singer of another band is just a little embarrassing, especially since he knows that certain band and that certain singer, and it’s also definitely nothing Luke wants to share with the world.

The last part of the interview goes quite well, considering Luke isn’t put into any other awkward situations of that kind and he actually talks to Dan and Phil as he gets more and more comfortable in the studio.

It usually takes him some time to unbend and come to trust the interviewer, which is definitely easy in Dan and Phil’s case.

When Luke takes a look at Twitter while Grace’ You Don’t Own Me is playing he sees that the fans are noticing his comfort. Unfortunately, they also heard what Michael said about Andy Biersack and there are tons of notifications for Luke’s account, from the usual faggot! and kill yourself-messages to fans that tell him how much they relate to him.

Reading all the tweets, he has to smile a little, especially when he sees an edit of him and Andy someone made, but he’s still a little uncomfortable with the knowledge that another piece of his private life has been exposed today.

Nonetheless Luke feels a little sad when they get to the end of the interview, knowing he probably won’t see Dan and Phil in a long time. He still wants to check out their videos, but considering how busy they all are something like staying in touch seems rather unlikely.

After a ton of compliments from both sides of the studio and even more jokes cracked by Ashton 5 Seconds of Summer and Dan and Phil each say their goodbyes to the radio audience.

“And in honour of Luke, Ash, Michael and Calum I think we should play one of their songs,” Phil ends the show. “So here’s Jet Black Heart, which is by the way my personal favourite from the recent album.”

“You actually listened to the album?” Ash asks with an incredulous expression as soon as the music starts playing and their audio is off.

Phil gives him thumbs up. “Positive. I mean, we take this job seriously, don’t we?” Dan just nods in confirmation and his colleague steps a little closer to him, their sides touching now, which immediately has Luke wondering if they are still on camera.

He glances at the lady behind the Plexiglas to his right, but realises she has left her spot. At the exact same moment Luke feels a hand lightly brushing against his thigh, fingers running down his leg before starting to caress his skin gently through his jeans.

“We’re done, baby,” Michael whispers into his ear and Luke leans closer without feeling any regret of showing their intimate moment to everyone in the room. It doesn’t matter anyway. Calum and Ashton know about their relationship since they started dating, and Luke is pretty convinced that Dan and Phil have a little more than just friendship going on.

“Can we get something to eat, please?” he asks Michael with a pleading look. “I’m starving, haven’t eaten since yesterday evening.”

“That’s unhealthy.” Michael pushes his head forward, nuzzling his nose against the space behind Luke’s ear. “I have to admit I’m hungry myself, though. Pizza?”

“Pizza, you idiot!” Luke sniggers, now completely forgetting about the other’s presence. That’s just how he is most of the time when the cameras are off – completely captured by Michael, the beautiful boy he can call his.

Then it happens. It happens and neither Luke nor Michael or anyone else is aware of it yet. The whole thing with all its consequences will hit them in a few hours, but right now they have no idea what’s going on.

Neither of them has.

“You’re together, aren’t you?” Phil’s question catches Luke and Michael completely off guard and they both immediately pull away from each other even though they didn’t even do anything that would proof anything.

“P-pardon?” Michael stutters and clears his throat, fiddling with Luke’s fingers underneath the table. He’s clearly not used to searching for words that somehow got lost on their way out of his mouth and as much as Luke may be surprised, he kind of likes helpless Michael, who proofs that the blue-head isn’t capable of everything.

“I said: You’re together, aren’t you?” Phil repeats with a soft smile. The host is leaning forward, eyeing the two singers with his blue gaze, his mouth close to the microphone as Jet Black Heart is still playing in the background.

“Why would you wanna know?” It doesn’t take Michael a minute to regain his confidence and suddenly he’s his usual self again, ready to defeat himself – or deny anything, Luke sadly realises.

Sometimes he wishes they could tell the world yet. But back in his mind he knows they have to wait if they don’t want to be a tragedy, if they don’t want to end up dead like Romeo and Juliet or half-alive like Rose and Jack or alive yet apart like Louis and Harry.

Luke couldn’t live without Michael; with all his might he still couldn’t fight his feelings for the other boy. He would suffer, suffocate without him. Michael has become his one and only, his heart and his soul, his eyes and his mouth, his emotions and his feelings.

Nobody wants to live without their soul. Luke doesn’t want to live without his soul. He doesn’t want to be missing parts of his body. That’s why he has to take it and act alongside with Michael until their contract is over.

“Oh, I’m just curious.” Once again it’s Phil who interrupts Luke’s thoughts harshly with his (kind of attractive) deep voice. “You don’t have to say anything, but I want you to know we’re not the people to tell anyone. It’s pretty obvious anyway.”

“So you think we are together?” Michael asks in a low voice, leaning forward as well until his nose almost bumps against the microphone. “Well, I can confirm we are. Let me introduce ourselves: I’m Michael Clifford and this is my love.”

Luke almost gasps at Michael’s unexpected words, his blue eyes widening in disbelief. The blonde doesn’t get it, he doesn’t get why his bandmate would do that. He has never admitted it to anyone beyond family and management, let alone random British radio hosts, who may be gay themselves.

However, after the first shock there’s another feeling beside the surprise stirring in Luke’s chest as he feels himself getting flustered. Michael is squeezing his hand under the table, but that’s not the reason for the happiness building up inside his body.

And everyone can be sure there is nothing more beautiful on the world than watching Luke Hemmings’ expression change from unlimited surprise to a look of total happiness and fondness as he slowly turns to look at Michael with the most precious little smile on his lips.

“So I told you,” the blue-haired boy states, pulling Luke closer to him after glancing at the Plexiglas to check if the woman has returned. “But what about you two? You’re not blind, but I am neither.”

“Well,” Phil smiles, “what does it look like?” At the same moment he and Dan simultaneously raise their hands, slowly as if to mock Michael a little, before suddenly their fingers are exposed.

Luke feels his smile grow even wider at the sight of the two glistening silver wedding rings in front of him; realising Dan and Phil are just goals for him and Michael. Everything they have is his goal to achieve someday and he can tell it is Michael’s as well.

Beside the two Ashton and Calum are glancing at each other, wearing their too-much-gay-tension-in-here expressions, but, truth be told, nobody cares about them at the moment. Everything that matters is right in front of Dan, of Phil, of Michael and of Luke.

“Well, good luck for you and your boy then,” Dan finally says, after a silence of at least half a minute.

Michael nods slightly, stepping back from the microphone and pulling Luke with him. “You two,” he says. “Damn, I wish you all the luck in the world. You’re just goals as fuck.”

“Oh, you are on the internet a lot? Another thing we have in common,” Dan laughs and adds: “One day we’ll go on that date I promise.”

“After Andy Biersack has got Luke pregnant,” Michael jokingly answers, instantly receiving a punch in his stomach from his boyfriend, who just can’t seem to stop blushing today.

“Call me when that happens!”

“Of course.”

“Bye then. Oh, sorry, Ashton and Calum. We kinda forgot about you.”

“Too much gay tension in this room, just saying.”

“Shut up, Ashton!”

“No one even likes you Michael.”

“Yes, they do. I got my gay alliance.”

“Anyway.”

With that ingenious comment from Ashton 5 Seconds of Summer leave the radio studio. And it’s safe to say that Luke is a little confused when he sees a message on Twitter that says:

It looks like Sister Danyul was a little naughty.

And, as mentioned, it hits them a few hours later, just after Michael and Luke have come back from getting lunch at a cute restaurant in Western London. Without any warning a woman from Modest!-management storms into the hotel room the boys are resting in, not even taking a break to catch her breath.

“We got a huge problem, guys.”

“What is it?” Michael curiously asks from his spot on the couch while Luke lazily sits up straighter on his lap.

“Well, you kinda have come out today.”

“No, I haven’t.”

“Yes, unfortunately you have. We are convinced it’s not your fault, Michael, but it’s still a problem.”

“What even happened?” Luke now steps in with a frown. The things the lady is saying don’t make any sense to him – when did Michael come out? He has confirmed his relationship with Luke to someone, but they were in a closed room with nobody else around. No one could have possibly heard them. Unless – unless…

“Well, it seems like you had a nice little conversation with Dan Howell and Phil Lester,” the Modest!-woman states, running a hand through her slightly messy hair. “I get that it’s okay as long as they are trust-worthy. But unfortunately there was a problem with the microphones.

And due to your conversation being live-broadcasted on BBC Radio 1, the fans know about you, Michael, it’s all over Twitter. And although you may not have mentioned Luke’s name they are already convinced that you are in a relationship with one of your bandmates.”

And while Michael still stares at the lady with an o-shaped mouth and incredulous expression Luke quietly says: “Well, at least we aren’t the only ones who have a slight problem now.”

(And at this point it is worth mentioning that it’s actually Andy Biersack who helps Michael and Luke coming out as a couple.

Because when the singer jokingly tweets something about wanting to take Luke out Michael can’t resist countering with:

Back off, Biersack, @Luke5SOS is mine and only mine. Find someone else to call your boyfriend.)

(Dan and Phil are going official during their next radio station and much to everyone’s surprise Ashton is the one being the biggest fangirl about it. He’s just a slut for YouTubers. Just saying.)