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“Farewell, my first friend… My enemy.”
As his body tipped backwards, plummeting into the lush flowers of the Menagerie, Ahn’zem felt as if his heart was about to burst forth from his chest. The miqo’te was bloodied and bruised from head to toe, possibly nursing a few broken ribs for good measure. However, despite his pain and aches, the desire to flee from the top of the building as the winds could carry him diminished within him as he saw the former tyrant’s blood panting the petals around him, further staining the array of crimson and white a deeper shade.
It made Ahn’s throat run dry, his chapped lips splitting slightly as he dug his fangs into them in an attempt to ground himself.
“Take heart, Little One.” Fray’s voice rumbled within his mind. “It’s over now. You should rest… Our vessel needs it.”
Voices spoke behind him, but the sound of Fray and ever encroaching static in his mind blurred everything into one cacophony of wordless drabble. Surely they were explaining the situation to the army that had arrived just as Zenos had decided to make his final move, so the dark knight knew he should say something to them all. Perhaps a rallying speech or word of encouragement would do the entire group some good, but Ahn’zem could not tear his gaze away from Him.
From Zenos yae Galvus.
Despite the fact he was just over a fulm or so away, the newly deceased prince looked almost ethereal in the flowerbed. It was as if he were simply sleeping in the soft soil, the fragrant blooms encouraging peaceful dreams of simpler times (if such a notion existed to the tyrant).
And despite knowing just how much Zenos had made him suffer- of all the unspeakable things he had put him through…
He still couldn’t cast his gaze away from that grandiose form.
I can’t look away, Fray… I don’t know how to. I’m not sure if I want to look anywhere else.
“Ahn?”
The voice of Zwynswys cut through his thoughts before Fray could talk to him. The roegadyn’s voice was wrought with concern as she attempted to get his attention. Ahn’zem realised belatedly that she had been talking to him the whole time, and not just to Raubhn and the Alliance. “As I was saying, the other suggested we seek out the aid of some chirurgeons. What with the battle of Shinryu being one of immense challenge… I think it’s a rather agreeable suggestion. My body is in so much pain after all that… I just wanna go rest for like, one hundred years..”
Nodding, Ahn’zem found that it took him a few moments to recall how to speak. His tongue felt thick in his mouth, as if it was too big to fit and heavy like a curse had been inflicted upon it. His eyes remained fixated on the corpse. “I-I’ll be with you soon, Zwyn, I promise. His throat was so dry he almost gulped. “I will join you all anon, just… let me have some space until I come back down to join you all.”
He pressed a hand to his chest, gripping the thick cloth and leather of his tunic just above the brand Zenos had carved into his chest. It ached and throbbed in time with his pounding heart.
I need it… he thought in a moment of foggy desperation. My revenge… It’s not over yet.
With his sister’s hand resting on his shoulder, Ahn found that her presence gave him a brief reprieve from the torrential emotions that threatened to overtake him. Despite usually being a rather boisterous and exhilarating presence, in this moment her voice was soft and tender, even as her limbs trembled against him. “Alright, but it can’t be for long. I know you both had your past… and what he did to you at Rhalgar’s Reach.” She gave his shoulder a comforting squeeze before pulling away. “I’ll see you in a little bit, brother.”
Nodding like a magitek bobble-head toy, Ahn’zem whispered out something that sounded like ‘okay’ as he watched his sister and the others clear out of the garden. Once he was out of the gaze of any watchful eyes, he let out a breath he felt like he had held for what felt like an eternity.
Slowly drifting towards the corpse like a man possessed by a sweet siren song, the dark knight let his blade fall from his grasp with a clatter- its weight currently too much to bear. His gloves soon followed, revealing hands burned by the rage of Nidhogg’s eyes (Ahn’s refusal to have them healed by magical means had transformed them into easily irritated patches of flesh), and the feeling of the cool evening air dancing across them soothed the pounding pain that thrummed in time with the rest of him.
Looking down at the former prince in a closer proximity reignited the anger that was fizzling under his skin, transforming into an all-consuming and encompassing rage and unabashed disgust for the Garlean.
“First friend?” He echoed back the words Zenos had spoken earlier, a hint of joyless amusement woven between them. “You’ve got to be joking! You may not remember, but I recall when I was just a mere sparring partner to you when we were fucking children!” The rage in his chest started to boil, bubbling over like a pot that’s been left to stew too long. “Forcing me to fucking fight, and then fight some more- using my sister against me and… and then trying to kill me?! Sure, that’s how friends work!” He began drawing out ragged breaths, trying to get his words out around the lump that was growing in his throat. “You taught me that being Garlean will bring me naught but trouble wherever I go- a curse to be associated with the likes of you because you couldn’t stop telling everyone about our past!”
Ahn’s knees buckled, and he fell to the ground, smacking the flower bed’s soft soil before a wretched scream was torn from him.
“And now you leave like a fucking coward! Saying we are the same in our obsessions to be strong- to prevail in strength.” He hit the ground again, his nails embedding in the dirt as he pulled up a fistful of stems. “But I wouldn’t resort to willingly cutting my life short just because I lost a fight. Lest I rending you, that you defeated me TWICE before I was finally able to get a one-up on you!”
Glaring at the body near him, he crawled closer still, until he was by the Garlean princes’ side. “Were you too afraid to try and get any better? Too weak-spirited when you finally lost? You fucking FOOL!”
Upon firing his insult, Ahn’zem shoved Zenos’s body with indignation before bringing his hands up into his hair and tugging as hard as he could. His resentment and true feelings flowed out of him in multiple wails of anguish.
“Little One.” Fray purred in his mind, doing his best to try and soothe the miqo’te. “Your anger… your rage… while justified, you need to reel yourself in lest you lose yourself to your darkness.”
It’s not fair! He almost took everything from me, and now he gets to look all high and mighty in his death!
The familiar in him pushed closer to the front of his consciousness. “I sympathise, Ahn’zem. While I was a little harsher on you in our early years… I understand what he took from you. What he made you do.”
Ahn’zem knew what Fray was doing, trying to make the other let his guard down enough so he could overtake him- pilot him away from where they were and keep them both safe. But he didn’t want it.
Stop. I am not tiring of this farce. Thank you, but please… let me do this. I need this… I can’t.
Fray went to further argue with him, but Ahn forced him back in a way he hadn’t done since he was fleeing Garlemald. He just needed to be by himself for a while.
Ahn’zem didn’t want to argue with his esteem… his revenge wasn’t quite done yet.
Casting his gaze over to Zenos, Ahn let his mismatched eyes roam over the prince’s tall form. All in all, the miqo’te couldn’t deny that the blonde wasn’t entirely ugly. His strong jaw and high cheekbones gave him the face of a fighter- in the most complimentary of ways.
Looking away as if he had been burned, Ahn’zem pulled his hand to his chest and closed his eyes.
My heart lies with G’raha Tia… Weakly reminding himself, he took a deep breath. While we had known each other since we were kids… any previous adoration I had of him died when I fled Garlemald.
Trying to dispel his thoughts, Ahn shook his head and let out a long, drawn-out sigh before he leaned over the armour-clad body. For a moment, he hesitated, anxiety spiking in his chest, and he found himself scanning the area around him. He had to make sure the area was clear before taking on his next action.
I don’t want anyone to witness me like this.
Dragging the pad of his thumb over Zenos’s lips, the dark knight noted distantly that they were softer than he had ever guessed for such a fearsome villain. They still held a small amount of warmth, and for a moment, Ahn felt his heart skip a beat and ice settle in his stomach. Taking a shaky breath, he moved his fingers to rest just under Zenos’s nose, testing to see if the tyrant would open his eyes once more and laugh that horrific but melodious laughter of his.
But he was dead. And the dead don’t suddenly burst into fits of maniacal laughter…
His blood, as bright as carmine powder, was still flowing freely from his neck, disappearing into his armour and sinking into the earth underneath him. Witnessing Zenos in such a mesmerizing sight made it harder for Ahn to swallow, his throat running drier than the Sagolii Desert, and he found himself recalling the words uttered unto him before the two crossed blades atop the Menagerie.
“It fills you even now, doesn’t it? The hunger. To bite down on my jugular, to feel the warmth fill your mouth and run over even as you drink deep.”
Ahn felt his body tremble with barely concealed anticipation. Now… now it was time for him to get his revenge. A revenge that had been burning within him since the two of them were children. From the first time Zenos had licked Ahn’zem’s blood off his blades, every time he won their sparring matches. The future tyrant would laugh at him, tell him how he enjoyed the taste of his specific aether mixed with resonant infected blood… how it was powerful and addicting, and he would one day capture Ahn’zem for himself.
“I think I’d like to keep a vial of this on hand at all times.” His voice, like velvet, purred in the back of his mind. The memory of Zenos towering over him despite their similar stature as children. “It’s so… alluring, all the more delicious when I draw it from you while we fight. Don’t you agree, Sebastia?”
His blood had always drawn Zenos to him, and now, Ahn’zem would get his own fill- his own blood back- as impossible as it sounded.
Distantly, he was aware that he was in no way ‘in the right state of mind’ following all of this. Fray continued to try to reason with him that trying to steal the blood of a corpse was anything but mentally stable. But, his mind was blank- he refused to listen to his voidsent familiar’s reasoning- finally pushing him back enough into his mind that he could no longer hear him. Ahn’zem didn’t want to listen to anyone; not Fray, not Zwynswys and definitely not Thancred.
Just an unbearable silence ringing in his skull.
All that remained for him to do was to lean in and become the animal he had been trained to be… the beast everyone saw him as.
Bite down and become a savage! You have the fangs for it- don’t you?
Ahn’s shaking breaths mingled with the shift of fabric as he leaned ever closer towards his prize. Within a moment, he was essentially face-to-face with the gaping wound in the Prince’s neck. The heavy scent of iron and flowers overwhelmed him with intense temptation.
Bastard planned this all along, didn’t he? Ahn’zem chuckled darkly. Knowing I would be so desperate to give in to my base instincts to claim the joys of My Hunt…
Taking one final breath, the pupils in his eyes shrank to pinpricks as he lurched forward, sinking his fangs into Zenos’s jugular. Hard. The taste of blood blossomed across his mouth in a way that made him let out a slight whine of keening need. His hands scrambled to find purchase against the tyrant’s broad, metal-clad shoulders, hungrily gulping down mouthfuls of blood.
If this is what victory tastes like, it has never tasted this good… Is this why you were obsessed with me, Zenos? Poor little Sebastia… missing out by not tasting your blood until now…
Ahn’zem’s nails scratched against the metal, his mouth firmly planted on the neck of the man he loathed the most, his heart hammering away in his chest as he let his tongue roam around the skin to assist in lapping up as much blood as he could. Head spinning and breath becoming faster, he distantly realised that he was desperate to have this taste at his beck and call.
He needed it.
He deserved it.
Another gulp felt tinged with power- one Ahn knew as resonant. Zenos’s resonant.
Now it’s our resonant… You stole so much from me then. And again. Now… It’s back where it belongs.
Another groan left his throat.
Even my own blood doesn’t taste this good…
Feeling his frustration and resentment against Zenos bubbling over in a fresh wave, Ahn’zem clamped his teeth down deeper. Now he desired to rip and tear until naught remained but bone and sinew.
I want you to be nothing more than an unrecognisable mound of blood. They will laugh at your once princely visage, and you will feel the humiliation seven hells down.
As he went to almost straddle Zenos so he could continue his feeding frenzy, a sudden scrape of metal against stone caused Ahn’zem to freeze. His ears flickered to full attention as he tried to make sense of the sound he had heard.
Steel caps against the floor. Light metal but durable for heavy hits and jumping… Fuck.
Cold sweat washing over his body, his eyes flickered up through his lashes to see the all-too-familiar colour of his sister’s soul. In his anger-induced haze and rampant resentment, the dark knight couldn’t place how long she could’ve been standing there.
I told you not to come up here, Zwyn…
“With her arrival, it seems you can’t ignore me anymore either, Little One. Your haze lifts and I am oath-bound to remake myself known to you.”
Huffing out a sigh through his nose, Ahn’zem tried to calm his heart and body so he could pry his jaws off of Zenos’s neck without further making a fool of himself in front of his sister. Rivulets of blood rolled down his chin, and Ahn quickly licked them away despite himself before he cleared his throat.
“Ah, Zwyn…” His voice was hoarse and rough. “I was just claiming that which Zenos offered to me before our fight: A glory promised by blood.”
Yes… of course, that will justify it… Not really.
“I’m afraid you let yourself drift away.” Fray disapprovingly sighed, and Ahn could picture the disappointment that was probably wrought on his face. “It’s been a while since you pushed me away so far… You worry me, Ahn’zem Hyacinth.”
Not knowing what else to say to his sister or Fray, he let his gaze fall back down onto Zenos. His neck was now akin to an animal attack, rather than the cleaner cut from his own blade, and seeing the gruesome depiction of the damage he had done…
He could see the teeth marks that had dug deep into the once pale column of skin.
He could feel the bits of it between his fangs…
His brain finally caught up to him, and he really started to think about what he had just done. Ahn'zem's stomach churned violently, but he refused to bend against the nausea that rose in his throat. He would not waste a single drop of the blood he had so desperately consumed.
Drinking the blood of a madman? What the fuck did I do? What did I just do-
Fray cut across the panic rising in his mind. “Little One, calm yourself… We will get through this.” His rumbling made Ahn calm down a fraction, taking deep breaths, he continued to listen to his familiar. “We can discuss this more together later, but right now, your sister still lingers, her worry more than apparent.”
Standing up, Ahn held a hand to his head, a migraine blossoming behind his eyes. It settled with a pain that steeped back into his bones- the chronic aching and injuries he’d previously ignored from his adrenaline were making themselves known with a vengeance.
His sister’s silence was deafening.
“F-Forgive me, Zwyn. While you suggest I seek a chirurgeon, I may prefer a rest first…” He gave her a wide berth, trying not to focus on the tremble he saw in her hands… the way she seemed to hold her breath as he loomed closer.
I am a madman… my soul and mind corroding away around the edges in my obsession.
Ahn’zem dared to look up briefly, locking eyes with her for a moment before he stumbled under her stormy gaze. A fresh wave of pain followed in his shock, rolling through him in an incessant wave. She went to reach out, but stopped short.
“Are you…” She trailed off before stepping back, her lips drawn in a tight line, her eyes looking anywhere but at him. “If you’re sure you want to skip it… I can send Y’shtola to check on you later.”
Shaking his head, he walked past her, feeling as if he was steeped in fog. “No need. I would prefer not to be disturbed until the morrow. You should rest, Sister.”
Dread settled in his stomach like a sack full of rocks. He was lost within the person he used to be, a mere husk of who he once was…
Where was the young man who wanted to prove he was more than just a savage?
Where was the Ahn’zem that was caring (albeit a little cynical), who wanted nothing more than someone to be proud of his accomplishments?
Where am I? Who am I now, Fray? I’m too scared to think about it.
Ahn’zem knew that the purer version of him was led away behind the constant barrage of pain and loss… Drowning in blood despite the glory that it supposedly gave him.
Stopping at the mouth of the entrance to the main part of the Ala Mhigan Palace, Ahn threw a cautionary gaze towards his sister, pressing his own shaking finger to his lips. The taste of iron still lingered heavily on his tongue. “Please… keep this between us. I don’t want you all to talk about how much of a monster I’ve really become.” He sucked in a shaky breath, trying to smile, but judging by the flinch that ran through her, he must’ve looked… less than appealing. “I-I’m sorry you had to witness such a side of your brother… If you forget it, you’ll be better for it.”
With his words being said, Ahn’zem made his escape. He didn’t want to wait around and hear what she had to say; he planned to return to his room in Mor Dhona and forget that the world around him existed.
It won’t be long before we’re dragged back into battle… Everyone always wants a hero- even if you’re not made with an ounce of virtue or innate goodness…
Oh Ahn’zem, you disgusting beast. Will the glory gained through blood really be worth it?
“Only time will tell, Little One.”