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There was a sharp ringing that lead Akutagawa to crack is eyes open. He groaned, feeling the throbbing in his head and the tightness around his lungs. What was that obnoxious sound? Looking around disoriented he spotted his phone lying next to him on the mattress. Right, he was supposed to be somewhere, wasn't he? A small cough escaped his lips, quickly developing in a full coughing attack. By the time Akutagawa was able to breath normally again, his phone had stopped ringing and he had forgotten all about it. He felt uncomfortable, and while that was nothing new in general, this was on a different scale from his normal coughing.
His whole body felt sweaty and he was too hot. He threw the blanket away from his body but refused to take off his shirt or coat. He couldn't be vulnerable right now. What if someone came looking for him, what if they came looking for Gin? A small part of his brain knew that his fear was irrational, that Gin was save. It was difficult to listen to this part though, when everything else screamed at him to search for cover. You need to hide, there is danger!
His head was spinning and he tried to swallow, to get rid of the awful try feeling in his throat. Another cough and he closed his eyes again defeated. He would just rest for a minute. No harm done. If anyone approached him, surely he would notice. Just one minute, 60 seconds and then he would look for cover and Gin.
He sighed and drifted into a pitiful version of sleep.
The next thing Akutagawa was aware of was a pounding noise. Was this the actual sound of his headache? Was this what pain sounded like? He was confused, how could he hear pain? But every time there was the pounding, he winced. He was disoriented and opening his eyes didn't necessarily make the situation better.
It was dim in the room, his room? The sun was about to set, huh that was weird. If the sun was about to set, then it had to be late afternoon. He shouldn't be in his room, he should be at work. At the port mafia.
In a moment of clarity he remembered that he wasn't living on the streets anymore. Gin was save with the Black Lizzards and he was supposed to be working with Nakahara-san today. They were supposed to meet in the morning to be more precise and now it was afternoon.
Akutagawa got up in a sudden movement and jumped out of bed, which might have been a stupid choice, giving his current physical condition. The first thing that hid him was dizziness from the sudden movement, making his legs unstable and his vision blacken out around the edges. The nausea came immediately after. He was going to be sick.
Blindly grabbing for anything to support his weight, his fingers found his phone ignoring the rumbling of his stomach. He had 5 missed calls and multiple text from Nakahara-san. How could he have missed that?
The pounding started again, this time with some shouting, but Akutagawa was too out of it to make sense of the words. At least he was able to make out that it was in fact someone knocking on the front door of his apartment. He felt tread as he carefully approached the door on shaky legs. His stomach was seizing up again and while the dizziness somewhat receded the nausea seemed to be about to peak.
He opened the door, saw ginger hair and an angry executive and that was all it took. Instead of greeting Nakahara-san and apologiesing as he should have, he ran towards the bathroom and barely made it before he was emptying his stomach of what little he had eaten before.
Chuuya stood there, ginger hair ruffled by the cold breeze that swept through the apartment as Akutagawa sprinted past him. The sound of retching from the bathroom reached his ears, and his expression shifted from irritation to slight concern.
"Damn it, Akutagawa," Chuuya muttered to himself, torn between annoyance and sympathy. He entered the apartment, closed the door, slipped of his shoes and approached the bathroom, hesitated for a moment, then knocked lightly.
"You alright in there?" Chuuya asked, trying to sound more casual than worried.
There was a brief pause before a weak response came from inside together with the flushing of the toilet. "I'm fine."
Chuuya sighed. "You don't sound fine,“ he paused unsure of what to do next but then sighed and decided that he could hardly leave the younger without accessing his condition first. “Open the damn door."
After a moment, the door creaked open, revealing Akutagawa looking paler than usual, a sheen of sweat on his forehead. He was shaking slightly, and his gaze was a bit unfocused. He didn’t look at Chuuya, instead decided to stare at the floor.
"Sorry, missed... missed work," Akutagawa rasped, his voice strained and weak.
Chuuya sighed, raking a hand through his hair. "No kidding. You're a mess and look like death. Did you catch something?"
Akutagawa scowled, but it was a feeble attempt at his usual intensity. "I don't catch things. I don't get sick." His grip on the doorframe tightened and he stood up a bit straighter to prove his point. He couldn’t be even more sick than he usually was. He remembered what Dazai would do if his coughing was getting too much or if he showed just a hint of weakness. Wincing internally, he tried to hide his exhaustion form the execute in front of him. He really didn’t want to make similar memories with Nakahara-san instead of Dazei.
Chuuya arched an eyebrow, skeptical. "Well, you look pretty damn sick to me. I canceled our plans for today, since you didn’t show up as agreed.” This time Akutagawa wasn’t able to hide the wince at the comment.
“You're in no condition to work anyway, so it’s fine. You're staying put until you're better. Plus, I don't want you spreading whatever you've got to the rest of the organization"
Guilt flooded Akutagawa body. He couldn’t show weakness, that would any harm Gin and himself. He needed to be strong for both of them, he needed to.
“This is nothing, I can still work. Let’s go,” he said stoically and started to move towards the closed apartment door. It was a good thing that he hadn’t taken is coat off, this way he was ready to leave, even if his clothes were drenched in his own sweat.
Chuuya only watched the younger one stumble with a somewhat amused somewhat concerned expression. Akutagawa didn’t get very far, however. Just a few steps out of the bathroom and he started to stumble over his own feet, swaying dangerously. Chuuya easily caught Akutagawa with his ability before he could collapsed onto the floor. He scoffed and maneuvered the dark-haired man to the couch.
"You're not going anywhere in this condition," Chuuya stated firmly, guiding Akutagawa to sit on the sofa. He looked around the apartment for a moment. They were in an open living space, combining the kitchen and the living room. On one site was a door that Chuuya now knew led to the bathroom, so he assumed that the other door at the other end of the room had to lead to Akutagawa’s bedroom.
He contemplated if he should move the sick man to his bed, but given Akutagawas resistance, decided against it for now. Instead, he quickly headed to the kitchen area and found a bottle of water. Motivated by this he opened the fridge, only to bet meet by emptiness. He sighed, was this another thing that the younger had copied from his former mentor? Neglecting his health in any way in favor of working for the mafia? Chuuya wouldn’t be surprised if Dazai had told Akutagawa these exact words.
He went back to the sofa. Akutagawa was half sitting, half laying, and Chuuya assumed the younger was acting out of pure spite to seem fine, pretending he was healthier than he actually was. The ginger rolled his eyes and handed him the water bottle. "Drink this. How do you feel, in all honestly. Anything else besides the nausea?"
Akutagawa glared at the water as if it were a personal offense, but he reluctantly took a few sips, before awkwardly looking away. “Headache, I’m cold and … uncomfortable,” he murmured.
Chuuya hovered nearby, arms crossed, a mix of annoyance and something resembling care in his gaze. "You're a pain in the ass, you know that? Running around like you're invincible. Everyone gets sick, even idiots like you. So, you have a headache, shivers and nausea. Are you sure there isn’t anything else I should know?"
Just looking at Akutagawas complexion he was pretty sure the younger had a fever as well. Maybe he wasn’t aware of it? It wouldn’t surprise him, given the state the younger tended to take care of himself.
Akutagawa scowled but didn't retort. The truth was, he felt like a shadow of himself, and the stubborn determination to push through his weakness was slowly giving way to the realization that he was genuinely unwell.
"Well, my cough and difficulty breathing, but that isn’t anything new,” he said defensively and closed his eyes before adding in a smaller, softer voice “Fine, I'll stay put for a bit but only because I don't want your damn lectures." They both knew it was a weak lie.
Chuuya's expression softened as he watched Akutagawa struggle against his own vulnerability. He sat down on the opposite end of the sofa, crossing his legs and leaning back. "Look, Akutagawa, I'm not here to lecture you. I just don't want you dropping dead on me. It'd be a pain to explain to Mori." He said, trying to lighten the mood at least a bit.
Akutagawa's scowl deepened, but he didn't argue further. The two fell into a somewhat companionable silence, the only sound being the occasional groan from Akutagawa mixed with tiny sips from the water bottle and the distant hum of the city outside.
After a moment, Chuuya leaned forward, signaling ever move to Akutagawa has she slowly raised his hand and let it rest on his pale forehead framed by black hair. Chuuya winced in sympathy as he felt the clearly too warm temperature of the other mans skin. The only reaction he got from Akutagawa was a slight blush, but that could also have been the fever and he removed his hand again.
The executives tone softened. "You know, it's okay to admit you're not invincible. Even Dazai gets sick sometimes, though he'd never admit it." Akutagawa tensed at the mention of Dazai but Chuuya continued, undeterred. "You're not alone in this. You've got people around you, whether you like it or not. And you're not going to be any good to anyone if you work yourself into the ground."
Akutagawa's gaze flickered, and for a moment, something akin to gratitude passed through his eyes. He didn't respond verbally, but the subtle acknowledgment spoke volumes.
Chuuya stood up, stretching his arms. "I'll find you a blanket or something. You need to rest. Do you have any fever medication? Otherwise, I can get some, you shouldn’t ignore this, your temperature seems pretty high, though I can only guess without a thermometer. I should also get something for you to eat."
He moved toward what he assumed to be the bedroom, not really expecting an answer from Akutagawa. While he disappeared into the other room, Chuuya made a mental list of all the things Akutagawa would need. He quickly found a worn blanket discarded at the end of the bed and returned to the living room, draping said blanket over Akutagawa. The younger man resisted the urge to protest, allowing himself to be covered.
Akutagawa coughed into his fist before clearing his throat. “There should be a thermometer in the medical cabinet in the bathroom. Gin got one years ago, since I tend to,” he trailed off, seemingly having realized what he was about to admit to the executive. Nobody needed to know that his physical health wasn’t as good as they all believed. This was his problem not Nakahara-san’s.
"Rest up," Chuuya said, his initial irritation completely gone by now. "I'll be here until you're back on your feet. And if you try to sneak out or go to work before you're better, I'll personally drag you back here."
He quickly moved to the bathroom, looking for any medication. He found some prescribed pills, probably for Akutagawa’s cough and grabbed them along with the thermometer. Other than that he cabinet was empty and Chuuya had to restrain himself from letting out a frustrated sound. He really needed to teach the younger one basic human self care once this was over.
“Open up,” he said unceremoniously as he showed the thermometer in Akutagawa’s mouth. He would need to get disinfectant as well, while he was out to buy the much needed medicine.
Hearing the peep he removed the device and glanced at the temperature, 39°C. While it wasn’t good it also wasn’t too bad and Chuuya let out a breath he hadn’t been aware he was holding.
“I assume you haven’t taken these yet?” he asked giving Akutagawa the bottle of pills. The younger one started to shift uncomfortably and avoided the olders gaze. So much for an answer then.
“Look we can do this two ways, either you let me help you willingly and cooperate, or I have to bully you into cooperation which would include calling Gin, who is on a mission out in Tokyo, so they would need to come all the way back to Yokohama. You choose.” Chuuya knew it wasn’t a fair choice but Akutagawa needed to realize that he wasn’t going anywhere.
Akutagawa scowled, the discomfort and fever making the decision more difficult for him. He hesitated for a moment, eyeing the bottle of pills in Chuuya's hand. He was well aware that calling Gin back from a mission was not only impractical but would also draw unnecessary attention to his current state.
"Fine," Akutagawa muttered reluctantly, accepting the pills. "But only because it's a waste of time for Gin to come back. Not because I need your help."
Chuuya rolled his eyes. "Whatever helps you sleep at night."
As Akutagawa swallowed the medication, Chuuya noted the struggle beneath the stoic exterior. The younger was clearly unaccustomed to being taken care of, especially by someone like Chuuya, who was more known for his quick temper than his nurturing qualities.
“Okay next on the agenda is food and fever medication,” Chuuya declared in a voice that was too loud to be comfortable for Akutagawa’s liking. Hies headache flared up again and he shrugged of the blanket Nakahara-san had placed over him earlier. He was too hot and his skin felt itchy, like there were a thousand ants crawling all over him. It made him want to rip of his clothes and skin in one part, but then he would be defenseless. In front of Nakahara-san. He wasn’t willing to admit to his weakness this much. Instead he closed his eyes and rested his head more heavily against the back of the couch.
There was a ringing sound in his ears and for a moment he felt like he was floating, it was concerning and nice at the same time.
A cold sensation on his forehead made him snap his eyes open and sit up as quickly as possible. His vision was slightly swimming for a moment but it didn’t take long to make out Nakahara-san’s face. He was being stared at from an unusal close distance.
“You’re back with me?” he could hear but it was like somebody had stuffed cotton into his ears and the words were difficult to understand over the continuous ringing.
Akutagawa shook his head to clear his thoughts, but apparently Nakahara-san was misunderstanding or looking for a different reaction. The frown on the executives face deepend and he reached out too touch Akutagawa. The cold sensation return and Akutagawa released that it was a cold wet towel being pressed to his forehead. It was kind of nice actually, even if it didn’t do that much to ease the headache.
“I will go quickly to the convenient store down the road,” Chuuya said slowly, not taking his gaze away from Akutagawa’s face. “I’m going to buy something to eat and medicine. I’ll be quick and I will talk to you over the phone while I’m out. Do you understand?” The tone wasn’t a command, but it felt like one anyway to Akutagawa.
He swallowed, closed his eyes for a second before nodding to signal that he had understood. “If you suddenly feel worse, you will tell me. I expect some form of signal ever few minutes from you so that I know you didn’t pass out. Do you understand?”
Akutagawa nodded again, not trusting that he wouldn’t cough if he tried to actually speak. “Good lord give me strength,” Chuuya murmured before slowly getting up. He called Akutagawa’s phone, went to the bedroom where he heard the ringing, picked uo the call and headed back to the living room. He lay the phone down on the table infront of the couch.
“Every few minutes you make some kind of noise, got it?” Chuuya repeated. This was probably overkill. Akutagawa didn’t seem that sick and even if he did fall asleep it’s not like hee would die or anything. No, this was more for Chuuya’s own sanity. His need to take care and comfort.
Chuuya's actions were more assertive than usual, driven by an uncharacteristic concern for Akutagawa's well-being. The younger found himself both irritated and oddly comforted by the attention, the conflicting emotions swirling within the haze of his fever. Normally he would fight with ever fibre of his body against being perceided as weak, but letting Nakahara-san take care of him felt… warm. It didn’t feel as bad or alien as it should have, and maybe that wasn’t a good thing but he was too exhausted to contemplate this fact right now.
As Chuuya left the coud, Akutagawa lay back on the sofa, feeling a strange mixture of discomfort and relief. The ringing in his ears persisted, and the dull ache in his head refused to completely even a little bit. He closed his eyes, succumbing to the lethargy that weighed on his body.
The sound of the front door closing snapped him back to attention, and he realized he was
Alone now. The apartment was eerily quiet, the only audible sound being the distant traffic. He reached for his phone, glancing at the missed calls and messages from earlier in the day.
Chuuya's voice echoed in his mind, reminding him to make some noise every few minutes. With a resigned sigh, Akutagawa began a ritual of periodic coughing and low hums. When he would be quite for a longer time, Nakahara-san would prompt him to say something but other than that their phone call was quiet.
Akutagawa listened to the background noise of Nakahara-san’s errand and in the midst of the routine, he found himself reflecting on the unexpected turn of events. Nakahara Chuuya, the angry executive with a reputation for violence, had become an unexpected caretaker. The irony wasn't lost on him. But maybe there really wasn’t any irony to begin with. Thinking back Nakahara-san had always treated him well, with respect even. He remembered a few occasions where the young execute had voiced disagreement over his training with Dazei. It seemed like he had cared back then already.
Akutagawa wasn’t sure how he should feel about this sudden realization. The apartment remained dimly lit, casting a subdued atmosphere over the space. Akutagawa listened to the sounds of the city outside, the distant traffic and occasional footsteps mingling with the muted noises of his own dwelling, letting his thoughts about thee ginger drift. It was a stark contrast to the usual hustle and bustle of his mind, a quiet interlude in the midst of chaos.
As he continued the rhythmic noises, Akutagawa couldn't shake the feeling that, in this moment, vulnerability had become a bridge between two individuals who, under different circumstances, might have remained at odds.
And so, in the quiet solitude of the apartment, with the comforting presence of Nakahara Chuuya in the background, Akutagawa drifted into a fitful sleep, allowing the moments of weakness to blend with the unexpected companionship that had woven its way into his night.
A shake to his shoulder rose him from his slumber and he looked up to see Nakahara-san leaning over him again. He could feel the fever thermometer in his mouth again, and the beeping sound, indicating that it was done, made him groan. Why was the room this cold and everything this loud? Instincly he reached for the blanket but Nakahara-san pulled it away before he could grab it.
“You’re lucky I was almost at the apartment door when you went radio silent on me. Otherwise I would have thought you had decided to actively ignore my request,” Chuuya joked before he looked at the number on the thermometer frowning. “You’re termperature increased slightly and I think at this point we need to actively try to get it down. Sorry but no more blankets for you.” His voice had a sympathetic tone that made Akutagawa want to sink into it and just drift off peacefully.
“Okay so here is the deal, you will take a very cold bath, while I make something simple to eat, which you will then consume together with the medicine I got. There is no negotiation happening,” Chuuya’s voice was more stern now and Akutagawa just acknowledged whatever he had been told with a quick nod.
Which let to him being hoisted up by his arms and led to the bathroom where he sat down on the toilette lid. He could hear water running but he didn’t bother to fully open his eyes to access the situation. The light was way too bright for that and he didn’t mind being unaware. Not with knowing that it was Nakahara-san who manhandled him into the bathroom in the first place.
After a while he heard the awfully nice soft voice of the ginger again. “Sorry kid, but you have to remove your clothes now. I won’t hurt you and I can leave if that makes you more comfortable.”
It took a moment for Akutagawa to fully process what had been said but once he did he actually forced his eyes open. Nakahara-san was standing in front of a filled bathtub, looking at him. And while he did feel weirdly calm around the executive, he wasn’t ready to be without his ability around him. To be his weakest self.
“I would,” he cleared his throat since his voice sounded more than a bit worn, “appreciated it… if you could leave.” For whatever reason admitting this felt like admitting to a fault and he looked down embarrassed. He could handle rinsing himself and getting into the tub.
Nakahara-san hummed a confirmation and started to shovel towards the door, but not before ruffling thee darkers hair for a few blissful seconds. “I leave the door open but won’t peak unless you call for me, deal?”
Akutagawa nodded, almost leaning into the hand resting on his head before it disappeared as quickly as it had approached.
Chuuya left the bathroom, and Akutagawa took a moment to collect himself. The bright light and the sudden activity had intensified his headache increasing the ringing in his ears all the while feeling like he was wrapped in cotton. He gritted his teeth and started to undress. The room seemed to spin, and he felt a pang of vulnerability that he rarely allowed himself to experience, always fighting it, resisting. The weak die, that was the law on the street.
After shedding his clothes, he hesitated before glancing at his reflection in the mirror. The pallor of his skin, the shadows under his eyes—everything seemed to emphasize the toll the illness had taken on him. He shook off the thought, determined to focus on the task at hand.
He quickly rinsed himself off with a washcloth and poured water over head hair before approaching the bathtub. The water in the tub felt shockingly cold as he eased himself in and he let out an involuntary hiss at the temperature difference. His body tensed at the sudden chill, but after a moment, he forced himself to relax into it, Nakahara-san wouldn’t make him do this if it would be bad for him. And after a few minutes of him just sitting in the tub, the cold water seemed to draw the heat from his fevered skin, providing a strange sense of relief. Akutagawa closed his eyes, trying to find some semblance of comfort in the uncomfortable situation.
Outside the bathroom, Chuuya was busy preparing a simple meal wit the things he bought at the store and organizing the medicine. He couldn't help but feel a strange mix of concern and frustration. Taking care of someone wasn't his usual role, at least not since the Sheep, since Dazai, and yet, here he was, looking out for Akutagawa in ways that felt oddly intimate.
As the water slowly warmed to a more bearable temperature, Akutagawa heard Nakahra-san’s voice from the other room. "Make sure you take your time. I'm not letting you out until I'm satisfied that you've cooled down enough."
The acknowledgment that the ginger was keeping an eye on him was both reassuring and slightly irritating. Akutagawa, despite his weakened state, couldn't shake the instinctive resistance to being cared for. It felt foreign and unsettling but also nice and reassuring.
After what seemed like an eternity, Akutagawa slowly rose from the water. His joints and muscled were sore but the headache had finally subsided a bit and he did feel better overall. Not great but definitely an improvement. The cool bath had done wonders for his fever, and he felt a bit more alert, though still far from his usual self.
Getting out of the bathtub was a bit more difficult than he would have liked to anticipate and the movement lead him into a rather pathetic coughing fit. He clenched his fist over his chest, stabilizing himself on the wall with his other hand until the coughing was finished. Only then did he realize that there were no clean clothes in the bathroom.
The though of putting his sweaty clothes back on made him cringe and he instead wrapped an oversized towel around him and trotted out into the living room. He hoped Nakahara-san wouldn’t notice him, but he was too cold now, shivering and teeth clanging and his luck had always been bad. So of course his simple wish wouldn’t be granted.
Nakahara-san approached him the moment he left the bathroom and Akutagawa couldn’t help the blush creeping up his neck and face. “No clothes,” he murmured and continued slowly towards his bedroom. Hopefully that would be enough of an explanation.
While Nakahara-san didn’t seem to retreat, he did signal for Akutagawa to go on, apparently somewhat approving of his cleared state of mind.
"Good, you look less like death warmed over now. Get dressed and come back to sit down, and eat this," Chuuya instructed, placing a bowl of simple rice porridge on the coffee table.
Akutagawa nodded and reached for the bedroom door. All he wanted was to escape this awkward situation and preferable go back to normal. However no matter how awkward he felt, he couldn’t help but notice that the atmosphere had shifted. The usual tension between them was replaced by an unspoken understanding—a recognition of vulnerability and the shared experience of navigating an unexpected moment of care and comfort.
Shaking his head he quickly grabbed some comfy clothes, grey sweatpants, an old sweater and fussy socks, he was freezing and he would dare Nakahara-san to comment on his outfit, before heading back and falling on the couch with more force than necessarily. He felt drained after the bath and wasn’t really hungry to begin with. Instead hee wrapped himself in the blanket and closed his eyes.
"No, no, no, none of that. You can rest after you eat up," Chuuya said, pushing the bowl of rice porridge closer to Akutagawa. "It's nothing fancy, but it's warm and should help settle your stomach."
Akutagawa opened his eyes, staring at the bowl for a moment before sluggishly picking up the spoon. He took a small, hesitant bite, knowing better than to disobey an executive. The warmth and simplicity of the porridge provided a surprising comfort. It wasn't the kind of meal he was used to, but in that moment, it felt oddly reassuring.
Chuuya, perched on the other side of the couch, watched silently as Akutagawa ate. The tension that usually lingered between them seemed to have dissipated, replaced by a more easy manner.
As the quiet persisted, broken only by the occasional sound of the spoon against the bowl, Chuuya spoke up. "You know, you don't have to act like you're fine all the time. It's okay to admit you're not invincible."
Akutagawa shot him a sideways glance, a mix of surprise and defensiveness in his eyes. “Look who is talking,” was all he said in response, which earned him a huge grin from Chuuya.
“There you go, already on the way back to your usual self,” he said with humor, his voice reflecting that strange soft tone that made Akutagawa feel things.
“Next is your medicine,” Chuuya said and this time Akutagawa didn’t even pretend to resist. He could feel contempt like this. Being taken care off for once. And without complaining he took the medicine before singing down on the couch, and maybe, just maybe he snuggled a bit closed to the executive before falling asleep.