Work Text:
Vee is in her world, letting 'Evermore' play softly in the background while she checks the pans on the stove. The bacon is sizzling, filling the air with a tantalizing smell. It’s time to flip the last pancake, so she pulls the pan back and with a twist of her wrist pushes it forwards, making it do a perfect flip, landing back in the pan. She smiles to herself, satisfied with her work, when she hears soft sleepy footsteps approach.
Damien makes a pleased noise as he approaches her.
“Smells divine in here.”
He wraps his arms around her waist, easily resting his head on her shoulder to peek at their breakfast.
“Less than a minute.”
He hums contentedly. “You’re the best. You know that?”
He kisses her on her cheek, causing her to chuckle.
“I know.”
She slides the last pancake on top of a neat little stack she’s prepared on a plate, and she takes the bacon off the stove. Right then, they both hear whining. She rolls her eyes in amusement. Pinky, her adorable toy poodle, is at their feet, begging for some of that deliciousness.
“She’s hungry.” He comments, fondly looking at the little dog. He bends to reach for her head and gives her a vigorous pat she clearly appreciates even though it’s not what she’s asking for.
“No, the hell she’s not. I fed her when I woke up.” She turns to the dog as she slips out of Damien’s arms to bring their plates to the table. “Dramatic little shit.”
“Woof!”
“Yeah, yeah. I know, baby. You’re the most pathetic little creature who’s never been fed. I’m so evil.”
Damien laughs and sits at the table, ready to dig in. Vee knows he appreciates her cooking skill and she’s proud of it. She enjoys cooking, but she enjoys feeding the people she loves even more.
“We aren’t in many videos together today,” he comments, “I’ll miss you.”
He’s so sweet. Acting like they won’t still be in the same building all day. That’s so silly, but adorable too. She gives him a little pout, bringing her hand to her chest.
“When will my girlfriend return from the war? And the war is shooting a video in the next room over.”
He snorts, putting a big piece of bacon in his mouth.
He’s not wrong, though. She loves being in videos with him, and Smosh does often pair them up on purpose because the fans love to watch them banter and flirt.
*
They head to work together. They greet everybody they run into in the office. She heads into the kitchen to make some coffee, while he gets distracted chatting with Shayne.
“Morning bestie.” Courtney says, walking straight to her and throwing an arm around her shoulders.
“Good morning.”
“So…” Court steps closer, whispering conspiratorially. Vee already knows what she’s about to ask. “Has he heard it yet?”
Vee shakes her head. “Not yet. But soon, don’t worry. I got this.”
She turns around, resting her back on the counter while watching Damien talk animatedly with his long time friend. She’s a little nervous, but she can’t wait. She hides a small smile in her mug.
*
Musical TNTL is the best . She and Angela do a duet that has everyone in stitches. Chanse almost falls off the stool.
She’s pleased with her work, even though after a TNTL her brain feels drained of all creative energy. It may sound like not much, but it takes a lot out of you to improvise one bit after another. She can’t wait to go back home and bury her face in Damien’s chest and relax.
She walks into the common area, finding him sitting there with Spencer. She pulls back a chair and drops in it. Damien is on his phone, but places it screen down on the table as soon as he sees her, greeting her with a big smile. Spencer is busy doing some work on his laptop, but he still offers a fist for her to bump in lieu of a greeting.
“‘Sup, bro?”
“The ceiling.”
He does finger guns at her. “Heyyy!”
Damien chuckles at their silliness.
“In all seriousness though, where have you been all day? I haven’t seen you since the dawn of time, it feels like. You aged well, though.”
She says as she scoots her chair closer to his. He puts an arm around her, pulling her closer to kiss the top of her head.
“Feels like that, huh?”
She turns her head in their embrace so she can face him. She puckers her lips, he gets the hint and places a kiss on them.
“Ew.” She exclaims, “What did Garret feed you?”
“You don’t want to know,” he laughs, exaggeratedly widening his eyes, “Trust me.”
“You smell like garlic and fish.”
“I’ll brush my teeth. My bad, baby."
“You voluntarily put that shit in your mouth, didn’t you?”
“It smelled worse than it tasted,” he tries to defend himself. She doesn’t know how he does it. She’s been on EIOYI a bunch of times, but every time she has to cradle the Yeet Bucket like a baby just in case. And usually ends up using it.
“It’s okay, I still love you even though you smell like an Italian mermaid.”
“An Italian mermaid?”
“Implying mermaids would smell like fish. Specie-ist much?” Spencer chimes in, only briefly raising his eyes from his work.
“They are half fish.” She doesn’t say ‘duh’, but it’s heavily implied.
Spencer doesn’t miss a beat. “Italian mermaids be like, ‘heyyy, I’m swimming ‘ere’”
That gets both of them to laugh. That’s so stupid.
Without realizing, she’s leaned harder on her boyfriend to the point she might as well be in his lap.
“Ew, get a room you guys.” Chanse says as he reaches the table and takes a seat. She glances at him and sees the glint of amusement in his eyes, so she knows he doesn’t mean it. She sticks her tongue out at him.
“Every day I have to deal with this sappy shit. Can you believe it?” He directs the question at Spencer.
“It’s called being disgustingly in love.”
Vee cheers. “Thank you!”
In the meantime Shayne walks up and pulls up a chair. He heard the exchange and he’s smiling resignedly but fondly. Damien scoots to make room for him at the table.
“See, he gets it.” She adds, shooting a pointed look at Chanse, who rolls his eyes half-jokingly.
“Of course he does. He’s ‘disgustingly in love’ too.”
Vee glances at Spencer and sees that he’s quietly smiling to himself. It makes her happy to see that, because she knows how hard it was for Ollie until they got together. It’s good to see that Spencer isn’t denying the ‘accusation’ of being in love. It’s sweet. In fact almost so sweet it makes her want to tease him mercilessly.
“Wow, you aren’t even denying it? Whipped much?”
Spencer chuckles. “If I denied it, first of all it wouldn’t be true and Oliver knows it. Secondly, if word of it reached him that I said something like that, he would make me take it back by all means necessary. And by all means necessary I do mean he would get me on my–”
“Okay!” Chanse interrupts by raising one hand. “Let me stop you there. TMI, Spencer.”
Spencer shrugs and returns to clicking away on his laptop. Vee and Damien are both laughing. Shayne is staring at a wall across the room.
“Why did I sit at this, of all tables? Like-” he laughs briefly, “I knew this was the oversharing table.”
“Don’t look at me, I haven’t said anything!” Damien tries to defend himself when Shayne’s eyes meet his. They continue bantering for a moment, But Vee can tell Chanse is cooking up something, so she looks at him with a bit of a challenge in her eyes.
“Yes? How may I help you, sir?”
“You are always oversharing but the one thing I still haven’t been able to get a straight answer about is ‘How big is he?’”
Damien’s eyes widen and some color rushes to his cheeks. “I beg your unbelievable pardon?”
Vee pats him on the shoulder as if to say ‘don’t worry babe, I got this’.
“I did answer, but we had to cut it from the video, remember?”
“Nuh-uh, that wasn’t a clear yes or no.”
“Can we change the subject?” Damien asks casually but it’s so obvious he’s begging.
Vee takes up Chanse’s challenge.
“For his sake, I will not reveal a specific number. I will say, however, that I’m a very happy girl. That’s all.”
“So he is big! I knew it!” Chanse almost jumps to his feet.
Damien buries his face in his hands. “Guys… can you not talk about my penis while I’m right here?”
“You’d prefer we talked about your penis while you aren’t here?” Spencer asks.
“...On second thought, no. Why is that worse, somehow?”
But Chanse is not done reeling. Vee isn’t denying it, so he takes it as a confirmation. Which, to be clear, it is. Damien might not be porn star levels of endowed, but he’s not small either.
“Why did you need to know?” Shayne asks, trying not to laugh too hard for poor Damien’s sake.
“For reference! I need my jokes to be accurate. Like, do I make small dick jokes or big dick jokes? I had to know!”
“Why do you need to make accurate jokes about my dick? ” Damien is completely red in the face. He’s gone. He’s losing it. He’s laughing but he’s also sort of crying. Vee can’t help the surge of affection in her chest, he’s just so cute when he gets flustered! But she knows this isn’t that big of a deal, they have both shared details about their sex life before, so she knows he isn’t actually upset, just a little embarrassed. Or she wouldn’t have said anything, of course.
Chanse is bent over the table too at this point. This stopped being about the truth and more about cracking each other up.
“I can’t believe we’ve been sleeping on this,” he says as he wipes away a tear and tries to compose himself.
“Next up on Smosh Pit: Shayne tries to guess everyone by their dick.”
Shayne throws a sideways look at Spencer. “Maybe not.” Spencer laughs.
“Why am I not surprised you guys are talking about dick?” Angela says, approaching from behind Chanse.
“Angela, you missed the reveal of the century.”
“What? What did I miss?” She moves her eyes from face to face, trying to suss out what the goss is.
“Someone here is apparently huge.”
“Who??”
“Damien ‘Hung Like A Horse’ Haas.”
Her eyes dart to Damien and a big smile paints itself on her face. “Wha–”
“Okay,” Damien intervenes, while Vee is just enjoying the chaos unfolding. “Let’s not get carried away. Nobody said that.”
“By the way, Chanse. If you wanted to know you could have just asked me.”
There’s a beat of silence where everyone, including Damien, stares at Shayne.
“What–” “Excuse me?” “Wait a minute, what–” “Bruh.”
“I mean because once back when we were roommates I walked in on him changing! Oh my god, guys. Get your head out of the gutter!”
Damien nods, “Yup. I remember that.”
“Slay.” Vee says without batting an eye.
“You knew how bad I wanted to know and you withheld this information from me,” Chanse pouts, feigning offense. “Unbelievable…”
“It wasn’t his to share.” Vee says.
“And it was yours?” Damien gives her this baffled look.
She shrugs.
“Okay.” Chanse rolls his eyes, “Stop bragging, we get it. You’re a size queen.”
“Shut up!”
She jabs him in his side, making him squeal.
“Ow! Bitch.”
She once again sticks her tongue out at him. In response, he sticks his out as well with a grimace.
“Okay, children. Let’s settle down, please,” Tommy says from another table.
“Have you been eavesdropping this whole time?” Damien asks.
Tommy raises his hands and makes a show of looking around. “We are all in the same public space.”
Damien sighs. “I won’t live this down soon, will I?”
“Nope.” Chanse chirps.
“Let’s not bring it up in videos at least.”
"Promise."
Damien waits a moment longer, before turning to her.
“Vee?”
“What?” He gives her a pleading look. “Why are you looking at me ? I feel attacked.” She can’t help but smile.
*
After they got home, had some dinner and had some time to rest, they settle on the couch to watch some Netflix on the tv. They put on some True Crime doc she’s been hearing about, but as cool as it sounds, she’s not really paying attention. Her mind is elsewhere.
She’s been stressing about this for weeks. Her new song is going to be released soon, and she still hasn’t told him. He knows of course that big things are happening in her career, and he’s as supportive as always, but this one feels different. There’s a reason, after all, if she still hasn’t let him hear it.
She’s gone back and forth about it, but she decides it might be better if he hears it here with her first, instead of listening to it in some other context and going “...wait a minute”. Like, yeah. It’s kind of a horny song. And it’s definitely about him. People will undoubtedly know, or at least speculate, since their relationship is public.
“Hey, Day.”
“Mh?” He looks at her. He must judge that the topic is serious, because he pauses the show and twists his body in his seat to face her. He puts one hand on her knee. “What is it? Are you okay?”
“Yeah, yeah.” It’s not like her to blush like a schoolgirl, but Damien has this effect on her. She wants him so much she wrote a song about it, after all. “So, I told you I’ve been working on a new song…”
“The one you’ve been keeping secret?”
“I wasn’t keeping it a secret!”
“I accidentally walked past your open laptop once and in a nanosecond you crossed the room and you slammed it closed so fast you nearly shattered it. I get it, I also have things I don’t get to talk about in my job. But that was kinda funny. Don’t deny it.”
She takes a deep breath. “Okay, yeah. It was funny. Sorry. But yeah, so this song, um, it’s gonna come out soon. I would like you to hear it.”
“Really? Why now?”
She shrugs, partly to shrug off her nerves. “I don’t know, it feels right.”
“Am I safe to assume all this secrecy is because it’s about me…?”
“...”
“...?”
“...Mayhaps.”
“Alright,” he squeezes her knee, “I want to hear it, then. Bring forth the ballad, Mylady.”
She huffs a laugh as she stands up to go grab her laptop in the other room. The whole time she feels like she’s choking. It’s not like he doesn’t know how she feels about him, but it’s- It’s just that everything feels more powerful when you put it into song, she supposes? It’s why she got into music from a young age in the first place, what drawed her to it. And what’s more, she wrote this long ago, when their relationship was in a different stage. She thinks he knows now, in hindsight, how she felt about him back then, but she’s never spelled it out for him this way.
She sets it on the coffee table and she sits down. She paces herself and hits play. The familiar notes start, and she waits with bated breath. She watches him take in the lyrics. All those allusions to trying to be professional and lingering gazes, and that line about being pushed against a wall, she can see him come to an understanding of what the song is really about. She isn’t normally shy, but even she feels self-conscious right now, with him having this whole emotional journey painted on his face in real time. Embarrassment or not, still a bop, though.
“Wow.” He says once the room goes quiet. “Vee, I…”
When he looks at her, anything else she might have been feeling melts away, leaving room for the desire to kiss him. The way he’s looking away is making her melt. She thought he’d appreciate it, she didn’t think he’d appreciate it this much.
“What did you think?”
“I think I need to get my hands on you right now.”
She jokingly rolls her eyes. “Yes, that’s often true. What else?”
“No, but for real.” He takes her hand, catching her by surprise with the sudden softness. “I hope you know that listening to this feels like taking a peek into my head back then, before we started dating. I get it.”
“Oh.” She didn’t expect that response for some reason.
“C’mere, babe.”
He gestures for her to move and she understands what he wants. She goes to straddle him, and he cups her face, pulling her into a soft kiss.
As things often do with them, it gets heated pretty quickly. Before she knows it, he’s pushing her flannel half way down her shoulders, and his hands are all over her. She loves this. She usually prefers to be in control, but she loves it when he takes initiative and shows her how much he wants her. And by God, is it showing. She grinds down on him, prying a small moan out of him. She smirks down at him, and she’s met with the most beautiful smile she’s ever had the honor to see.
“That’s enough.”
With that, he gently slaps her ass, prompting her to stand up. As she does this, he follows her movement, bending his knees and keeping his hands on her thighs. In a second she finds herself in his arms, lifted off the floor. She wraps her legs around his waist for safety, even though she knows he’s perfectly capable of carrying her.
He doesn’t think twice before heading to the bedroom. She allows herself to enjoy the feeling of being held like this in the meantime, even teasing him by kissing his neck. He tosses her on their bed. Her stomach does a flip when she feels herself fly into the hair for a brief instant. It’s always so hot when he acts like this, she loves how strong he is, even if he’s always complaining that he doesn’t work out enough. She doesn’t know what he’s talking about, to her he’s perfect no matter what he looks like.
When she lands, however, her mood is thrown off by a sudden loud squeak. They both freeze, staring at each other in confusion. She feels something, so she digs under her body, and- yes, here it is. Freya’s little mouse. How did that end up there? That’s a question every pet owner has to ask themselves, one way or another. Especially one with ADHD, so you never really know whose fault it was. Did Vee put the mouse on the bed? Unlikely, but you never know.
It’s as if Damien can read her mind, because his lips crack into a smile at first, then he erupts into full blown laughter, and she can’t help but follow suit because it’s just so joyful and contagious.
She tosses the cat toy in a corner, sure the cats will get hold of it again no matter where it lands. Damien wastes no time kneeling before her. He grabs her by the thighs and pulls her closer. He looks so focused while he undoes her jeans, pulling them down to her ankles, then he gives the same attention to her lace panties. He makes an appreciative noise at the sight - she loves wearing lingerie for him - before pulling those down too.
He leans close, and starts placing kisses all along her thighs, making her sigh at the feeling of his warm lips on her. He can be such a tease when he wants to be.
“Dames.”
He lifts his head, looking at her like he has no idea what she called him for.
“You already can’t wait any longer?” He hums in feigned disapproval, “So needy.”
She whines, huffing and closing her eyes to try and calm down. She can feel her cunt throb between her legs. If he doesn’t touch her, she swears to fucking god–
He gets closer, but not enough. Inch by inch, but never quite there. She can feel his breath on her, the warmth of it. It’s driving her crazy.
“You know I won’t beg.”
He laughs briefly, “I know. I don’t need you to. You’ll just have to wait until I decide it’s time.”
She waits until he’s close enough, then wraps her legs around his shoulders and pushes him closer. This causes a startled sound to escape him, then a soft chuckle.
“Alright, I get it. My baby is impatient tonight.”
“Your baby is going to ride your face if you don’t get a move on.”
“Mh. Tempting.”
The little shit he is. Remind her why she’s in love with him, again?
“ Babe .”
She’s not begging. She’s demanding. It’s totally different.
That seems to work, because suddenly his mouth is on her and she almost screams with how good it feels. He laps at her slit, all the way up to her clit, then focuses on it, sucking on it gently while teasing the underside with his tongue. She swears she’s never been with anyone who’s this good at this. She isn’t sure which girlfriend is responsible for this, but she would like to personally thank her.
Heat pools in her lower abdomen, she almost feels dizzy with how good all of it is. His hands are still on her thighs, alternating massaging them and squeezing them hard enough to almost hurt. He gets his tongue inside her, pushing it as far as it will go. She grasps at the sheets and lets out a long moan.
She reaches for his head, blindly grasping at his hair until she’s gotten a fistful of it, and she pulls on it, using the grip to push him down against her, grinding her hips against his face. She’s already so close, it almost feels like a crime to come so soon when they’ve only just started.
She knows he can tell. He knows her and her body so well by now. He grabs her by the hips to hold her in place, and he doubles down his efforts. While his mouth is taking care of her clit, he slips two fingers inside her and starts fucking her until she’s nearly screaming.
“Fuck! Fuck, Damien! It’s so good- so–”
But what is she telling him for? He knows what he’s doing. She comes on his tongue, the release making her body tense up at first, clenching around his fingers, and then relax, dropping back on the mattress with a happy sigh.
She keeps her eyes closed for a while, catching her breath, listening to her own heartbeat. She hears him shuffle around, she knows he’s cleaning himself up, and then feels the weight on the bed shift and finally opens her eyes to see him lying next to her, looking at her with such fondness she almost chokes.
She smiles and kisses him. She rolls them over so she ends up on top of him. He sits up, allowing her to take off his shirt, gaining more access to his neck and shoulders so she can kiss and nibble wherever she likes. But that’s not her end goal. She knows he was hard before, she knows he’ll be straining by now. She scoots back and he understands, helpfully lifting himself up enough for her to pull down his pants and underwear.
Once his erection has been freed she gives it a stroke or two, before deciding lubrication might be needed. She makes sure he’s watching while she dips her fingers in her cunt, pulling them out all wet and shiny, and then uses that on him.
He’s so lost staring at her that he doesn’t react immediately, but then the feeling gets to him and he sighs. She slowly lowers herself on it. He holds onto her thighs and looks up at her in awe. She sets a pace she likes and she leans down to kiss him deeply. Meanwhile, he just can’t take his hands off her.
“You’re beautiful.” He suddenly blurts out.
That makes her chuckle, speeding up her pace just a little as a reward for him.
“Thank you. You’re not so bad yourself, baby.”
He blinks, flustered by the compliment. He can’t hold back a moan, then bites his lip. She keeps riding him, finding an angle that works for both of them, and doubling down.
“Oh, fuck-” she groans. She can’t believe she is so close to coming so soon already. She swears she’s not making this shit up, she never used to be able to come multiple times before she got with him. And it’s not like her other lovers were incompetent! She hears him huff a laugh.
“You close too?”
She nods.
“Come for me, babe. You’re doing so well. Come on.”
She reaches for her clit, quickly massaging it in circles to the rhythm of her thrusts. She hears his breath hitch and he grunts. His grip on her thighs intensifies. Luckily it’s not the season for shorts, so she doesn’t mind a few bruises right now. They’ll be gone in a few days, anyway.
She feels him tense up under her. She distantly registers this fact as her second orgasm washes over her, making her whine his name while he softly calls hers. He grabs the back of her head and pulls her into a kiss, moaning wantonly into it. When they part, she takes a deep breath and catches him doing the same.
“If this is the effect it has on you, I’ll write more horny songs about you.”
He laughs, closing his eyes and dropping his head back on the pillow. “It wasn’t the horniness, it was the longing. That’s what got to me.”
“Longing made you hard?”
He opens his eyes and gives her this look like he can’t believe he puts up with her nonsense - except he does because he loves her, and they both know it.
“If it’s you? Sure, yeah.”
His genuine response to such a deliberately stupid question catches off guard. She climbs off him, settling next to him. He turns on his side. They are lying face to face now. She’s still not over his answer.
“You know I love you, right?”
He smiles at that, tucking her hair behind her ear. “Yeah, but I like to hear you say it. I love you too.”
She can’t help herself. He’s too cute. She just has to boop his nose.