Chapter Text
“Om-”
As Ryo walks towards me, I see her take a bite out of a freshly pulled weed. She takes her time chewing, speaking to me in-between bites. “You ready?”
“A-Ah, yes!” I squeak out.
In a surprising turn of events, Ryo invited me out last night… me, alone. I asked if she wanted to discuss something about our recent writing sessions, but she insisted that there would be zero band talk today. But Ryo isn’t really a… social person, so I’m still left wondering exactly why she invited me of all people out alone…
Nonetheless, I agreed to the outing and left early this morning to make it for the time she picked. She had designated an area close to Starry as our meeting place, but I arrived an hour early, just in case. The area was a bit of an intersection of paths with a moderately sized tree in the middle of it all, benches surrounding it. It was a nice kind of cloudy today, so I simply sat on one of the benches in wait. Things really started taking a turn for the worst when she didn’t make it on time. At first, I thought she was just running late, but after five minutes I started to consider the worst possibility - just before our first outing as friends, she realized that she actually hates me and is actively going to avoid me from now on… For some reason, that thought made my chest tighten up, so I curled up into a ball in the shade.
But then, another five minutes later, I saw her walking up in the distance - weeds in hand. I hastily stood up to greet her, hoping she didn’t notice my prior position. Everything seemed fine so far…
“...You want some?” Ryo says, looking towards me.
Realizing unease is still showing on my face, I quickly try to fake a smile. “A-Ah, u-um… N-No, that’s okay. Y-You look like you’re enjoying them, so…”
“They taste awful,” she says bluntly.
“O-Oh… W-Why are you eating them, then?”
“Saving money.”
I slightly tilt my head. “I-Is there something you want to buy?”
She looks away from me, taking a pause. “...Sorry I was late.”
“Eh?”
It's such a non-sequitur that I'm taken aback… Then it hits me - she realized why I was feeling upset. I never realized… that she was paying me that much attention. I guess… even when we discussed my first lyrics, she saw through me right away there too…
Why… do I feel so warm?
She looks back to me with slightly uncertain eyes before continuing. “...I was working on a new song last night. I couldn’t get it to sound how I wanted it to in my head, no matter how much I tried to re-record or play around with the mix. I was getting angry, honestly… but I kept trying until I thought it was at least decent. It was so late by the time I fell asleep that I overslept. That’s why I was late.”
“...W-Why are you telling me this?”
Usually she’d just play it off with some kind of joke and act like it wasn’t a big deal, but this time she was fully honest with me.
“Because I made you sad,” she admits with a surprisingly regretful tone.
“E-Eh!?”
Ryo's eyes drift to the side. “I saw you before you noticed me.”
“O-Oh… S-Sorry!”
“I’m the one apologizing.”
“Oh, sorry!”
“...You’re funny, Bocchi.”
She gives me a small smile, almost reminiscent of her usual smirk but with slightly more warmth. I've never seen Ryo be so conscientious of the people around her. For some reason, it's making my chest tight again.
“S-S-So, w-what did you want to do today, Ryo?” I ask, desperate to get my mind off of that feeling.
“I don’t know,” she says blankly.
“E-Eh?”
Her deadpan delivery completely stops any train of thought I may have had. This isn’t like how it goes in manga at all… When someone invites you out, it’s for a specific purpose that will lead to a scene of newfound closeness, right??
“T-Then… why?”
“Mm?”
“Why did you invite me out?" I honestly ask.
“…? Because you’re so fun,” she says nonchalantly.
“E-Eh!?” My face was turning red from the unexpected praise in less than a second.
“What?”
“I-It’s just… I-I didn’t…”
Ryo gives me an inquisitive look, trying to decipher what I'm trying to say. “…Did you think I didn’t like you?”
“N-No! Not that! J-Just… I-I’m not usually someone people think to invite out…” My voice trailed off into a dejected whisper.
“…Is this about last summer?” she asks with a knowing tone.
“W-Well…”
I can’t lie and pretend that didn’t affect me in some way. I know we made a promise to go out more after Enoshima, but… I wasn’t sure if that would actually stay true… Would anyone really invite me out just to make me feel better?
“…I invited you because I wanted to. Don’t worry.”
“A-Ah…”
I should’ve remembered… Ryo isn’t the type to do things like that… Which means… it’s okay to think that she likes me, right?
…I have that feeling in my chest again.
Ryo faces forward. “Let’s go.”
“E-Eh? Where? I-I thought you didn’t have a plan??”
She gives a small smirk. “There’s a record shop around here I wanna go to.”
“O-Oh, um, o-okay!”
Ryo’s momentum kept me from spiraling into my own thoughts, so I hung onto it with all of my might. I‘ve always admired the fact that she marches to the beat of her own drum… or her bass, I suppose. In fact, Nijika often gets on her case about playing to her own tempo when she gets ‘in the zone’, hehe.
As we begin to stroll the streets together, I notice Ryo continually checking to make sure I'm keeping pace with her. It was subtle, most would never even notice, but I’d seen Ryo drift off into her own world enough to realize when she was paying extra attention to something. I actually liked that part of her, maybe just because it helped me feel a sense of communality with her. Come to think of it… when did I start paying so much attention to Ryo?
…My chest hurts again.
“Bocchi.”
“E-Eh?”
Ryo doesn't give me a verbal response, but simply motions her head upwards. Following her implication, I look upwards and realize that we've arrived at the record store. It has a name I don't recognize, not that I frequent record shops, but it must not be a popular chain or anything.
“Let’s go in.”
“O-Oh, sorry!”
“…”
I had been staring at the sign way longer than any normal person would have. Just as I start to walk in, however-
“Bocchi.”
“A-Ah, yes??” I stop dead in my tracks.
“…I want you to have fun today,” she says with a genuine touch of care in her eyes.
“R-Ryo…”
I know that she isn't the best at saying what she really means, so I can tell… this is her way of being considerate. ‘You don’t have to feel stressed.’ is what her eyes are telling me. Just that little action… makes me feel so warm.
“Sor-… T-Thank you.” Attempting to give her a smile that felt genuine but still hid just how much those words meant to me, she simply smiles kindly in response as we finally enter the store.
“I-Is there anything in particular you’re looking for?” I still sound a little timid, but I’m trying my best to feel comfortable in the moment. Ryo answers me while combing through record after record.
“Mm. I’m looking for a special edition of an LP.”
“Special?”
“It was a limited edition release containing demos of every song on the album.”
“Ohhh… Is it really rare?”
“It’s old, so it’s not easy to find.”
“What band is it?”
“Oh, well they’re-… Actually, you’ve probably never heard of them.” Looking dejected, Ryo continues to scan the rows upon rows of vinyls.
That was… weird. Ryo isn’t usually one to shy away from a passionate monologue.
“E-Even if I don’t know them, I still want to hear about them.”
“…It might be boring,” she says is an almost deprecating tone.
That’s what she was worried about?
“I-It’s okay! I… I wanna hear you talk about things you’re passionate about…”
“A-Ah…” Oddly, she puts a hand to her mouth and turns her face away from me. I seem to have caught her off-guard with my comment, but I'm not sure why…
After collecting herself, she continues, “…You know how the 80’s was dominated by hard rock?”
“Mm-hm?”
“If you were a rock band, you had to sound a specific way to get on the radio. But there was this band, Chaosflame, that didn’t seem to care at all about what was safe and just played songs that they wanted to play.”
Oh… I think I see where this is going… It’s like what she talked about when she read my first lyrics…
“They never got airplay, and they only lasted for a few albums, but I still find their work inspiring. And considering the slump I’ve hit with our new song, I thought listening to their demos and seeing where their ideas came from might help.”
She’s still worried about last night, huh?
“…Have you checked Oh!Tube?”
“Mm. They have some of them up, but not all. This is a pretty niche band from almost 40 years ago, so it’s not like many people are looking for them.”
“O-Oh, I see.”
Letting her finger come to a stop, she takes a break from perusing the store’s inventory and stays silent for a few seconds. I'm almost worried I did something wrong.
“…I think it might be even harder to be creative now,” she dejectedly admits.
“Eh? W-What do you mean?”
“Pop dominates the industry. Trying to become a modern rock band is waving goodbye to airplay, so you’re forced to try and make it on streaming services. But if you’re too weird and experimental, the less people will like your music and the less the algorithm will recommend it to new users. But, at the same time, if you’re too generic, you’ll be drowned out by all of the other generic artists trying to make it big. Some days… I seriously feel like it’s a losing battle.”
“Ryo…” I had never seen such a bitter look in her eyes before. This song must really be messing with her…
“…But, that’s why Chaosflame is so inspiring to me. Even when everything was against them, they made songs that they were proud of. I want to do that too. I just need… the right lightbulb to go off.”
“…I’m sure you’ll be able to.” I was interested in hearing about this from Ryo, I really was… but the tightening in my chest just seems to get worse and worse the more she speaks.
“…Is there anything you want to buy?” Sensing that I was beginning to spiral once more, Ryo’s question quickly brings me back to reality. But… her question has me just as anxious to answer.
“…W-What do you think of modern music?”
“Too broad. What do you mean?”
“D-Do you think all music nowadays is awful!?” Closing my eyes, I desperately ask this at a much louder volume than I intend to.
“Not at all. I think anyone who says that is stupid, honestly.”
…Eh?
“R-Ryo!”
“No, think about it. We’re in an age where anyone and everyone can make music. There’s more music widely available on streaming platforms than any other period in history. If you seriously think that out of all of the millions of songs that come out every there’s not a good collection of songs you would like, then you’re just an idiot. Pop may dominate the radio, but you can listen to whatever you want now. Try and find some music that you enjoy instead of falsely claiming to know the quality of songs you’ve never heard.”
“R-Ryo…”
“…Sorry, I got a little too heated there.” Looking genuinely disappointed in herself, her head droops and looks away from me.
“I-It’s okay. That… makes me really happy to hear. There’s a lot of new music that I love. It makes me sad when people just assume nothing good is made anymore.”
“Well, we’re around after all, so of course modern music is good.”
“Hehe, I-I guess you’re right.”
The proud pose she struck, placing a hand to her chest, while speaking those words all but enraptured me. I can't even stop a dumb smile from forming on my face.
In an attempt to hide it, I quickly turn to check the records myself. I seriously doubt they have the artist I'm looking for, he's completely indie after all, but I just need something to hide my face from-… oh…
“They actually… have it.”
“Mm? Oh, this is a pretty good place for rare finds. I’d be more surprised if they didn’t have something.”
Giving a little "Oh," to Ryo, I move to pick up the vinyl, still in the cover of course, and just stare at it for a few seconds. This album…
“To Let Go?” Ryo peeks over my shoulder to see the LP. I don't have any intention of hiding it.
“Mm-hm.”
“I’ve never heard the artist's name before.” Despite how she said it, I could tell Ryo was subtly telling me to give her more info.
“He’s mostly popular on Oh!Tube. He got known for doing covers and songs about different types of media.”
“Nerdcore?”
“Mm-hm. But… his original albums have always been my favorites.”
“Oh, so this is…?”
“His third original album. It’s pretty new, I’m surprised they already have copies.”
“Is this your favorite?”
“…I think so. It’s… the most personal album I think I’ve ever listened to. It almost feels like a conversation. Maybe that’s a little too parasocial…”
“…I think it’s fine to make connections through songs. I bet people connect with yours.”
I let out a small, self-deprecating laugh at her response. “…I wish I had the strength to be as honest as some of the lyrics here.”
“What’s it about?”
“…Letting go of bad influences, I suppose.”
Ryo didn’t answer, but the light in her eyes urged me to continue. I decide to start from the beginning.
“I think part of the reason I like his work is because he reminds me of myself. Becoming popular through other people’s music, and being too scared to fully branch away from what made you popular in the first place. Even just the feeling that the longer you last, the less interesting you become to people.”
I take a deep breath before continuing, an attempt to hold back my buried emotions.
“This album… is about letting go of all of the negative feelings you let fester in the past, and trying to be better.”
I could say more, but I fear that I won’t be able to hold back my emotions if I do…
“…You wanna buy it?” Changing the topic to a more lighthearted one, it seems clear that Ryo is picking up on my emotions more than usual today.
“…No, I-I already have a special edition coming in the mail.”
And just as I move to put it back-
“Ah-“ She snatches it out of my hand.
“Mine, then.”
“E-Eh? B-But… You might not even like it…”
“…I wanna hear what made you so passionate.”
“R-Ryo…”
With a simple but meaningful smile, she goes back to looking for her other target. A warm silence brews between us. I feel as if she’s letting me get a handle of my emotions once more before pressuring me to speak. Not to mention… I’m beginning to like these kinds of silences between us.
Agh… My chest hurts again…
“…Heh.” A satisfied smirk on her face, Ryo pulls out the LP she’s been looking for. Bundling both of the albums together in her hands, she turns back towards me. “Ready to go?”
“Mm-hm. T-Thank you for letting me relax for a few minutes.”
She once again just responds with a smile, but the particular warmth to this one seems to speed up my heart more than I would expect from a friend…
Once we’re back out on the street, I’m a little surprised at how cold it is. The temperature didn’t change that much from when we entered, but being side by side in a small building for so long makes the weather this gray sky brings a little less loveable.
Ryo lets out a “Brr-"
“I-It’s starting to get cold now, huh?”
“Winter is coming…” she says with a bitter tone.
“D-Do you not like winter?”
“There’s less people around, but it’s cold.”
“Mm, I get that feeling.”
“I guess we’ll have to find somewhere warm.”
“Hm?”
“For the winter.”
“…E-Eh!?” It takes a moment for my brain to process the words, or rather the meaning behind them. She wants to keep inviting me out… even into winter?? “A-Ah, w-well t-that’s…”
I honestly don't know how to respond…
“Hey, there’s a cafe I like around here. It’ll be warm.”
“M-Mm. O-Okay.” Your words are already warming me up though…
Side by side, we walk towards our destination. She wasn’t lying, it's very close to where we already were. Opening the door for me, Ryo saves me from another embarrassing entrance like last time…
Once we're inside, Ryo quickly takes me to her favorite seats in the back. They're surprisingly soft and comfortable. This place doesn't have a window like last time, but the darker lighting is actually a calmer atmosphere for me. Before long, a server comes to our table.
“The usual?”
“Mm,” Ryo casually responds.
The server turns toward me. “And for you?”
I hastily look through the menu. I wasn’t expecting Ryo to be that much of a regular here!!
“U-U-Um… H-Hot chocolate, please…”
“Coming right up,” the server says with a smile.
As she walks away from us, I sink into my seat. That was so much more stressful than I was expecting…
“…Is that your usual?” Ryo asks.
“Eh? O-Oh, um, y-yes. I-I don’t really drink coffee.”
“I’ll make sure they write it down.”
“N-No, you don’t have to-“
“It’s fine.” With an almost smug smile, Ryo insinuates that she's going to do it no matter what I say, so I simply look down, hoping to hide my blush.
“…O-Okay.”
After a minute or two, our drinks arrive. I can see the steam coming out of my hot chocolate, and I can see… nothing coming out of Ryo’s… as it's in a plastic casing.
“I-I thought you were cold?”
“The cafe’s warm, and I like their iced coffees, so…”
“M-Make sure you finish it before we leave.”
“Mm?”
“Y-You’ll… get cold again…”
“Oh. Thanks, Bocchi.”
Before the server leaves, Ryo asks for an order of some cake I’d never heard of. I'm excited for a second until I realize that she was gonna ask me to pay for it… I guess it’s what I get for agreeing to go out with her today…
“S-So, considering you have a ‘usual’, I assume you come here often?”
“Woah, never thought I’d hear you try a pick-up line,” she says playfully.
“E-Eh!? N-N-N-N-No!! I-I was genuinely asking!!”
My heart is beating so fast it feels like it’s gonna burst out of my chest… why!?
“Hehe. I know.”
“T-Then why-"
“Cuz I love your reactions.”
“I-I… Th-That’s…” I'm turning red at a frightening speed. I have absolutely no idea how to respond to that…
While I'm still recovering, the slice of cake is brought over, along with two forks.
“Wanna try it with me?”
“…S-Sure.”
It’s something to get my mind off of my embarrassment, and considering I’m probably gonna be the one paying for this thing…
“It’s mocha flavored. Is that okay?”
“Mm. I usually like that.”
Satisfied with that answer, Ryo picks up her fork and I follow suit. Taking a bite into the cake, I’m surprised at how vibrant the flavor is. There’s a perfect sweetness that works in harmony with the bitterness of the mocha to create a satisfying mix in every bite. It doesn’t take long for us to finish it.
“Th-That was so good…”
“This place is way better than the last one we went to.”
“A-Ah, I just ordered water there…”
“Trust me, this place is better.”
“W-We…”
“…?”
As she gives me a probing look, I force myself to say what I want to say. “W-We should come back here sometime…”
“Oh, I was already planning to.”
“O-Okay!”
Even just the fact that she’s planning ahead for us like this…
My heart keeps beating faster and faster…
…I’m not sure how much longer I can keep pretending I don’t know what this is.
When the server walks over again, I’m ready to grab my wallet, but to my surprise… Ryo pulls out her own and pays for the entire meal… But that…
W-Wait, when she said she was saving money before…
…
“I don’t really have any other plans. Wanna walk around for a bit?”
“A-Ah… s-sure!”
But… what if I’m totally off the mark… I’ve finally found a friend that wants to spend time with me… If I ruin that by trying to push it further than friendship, I could ruin my only good relationship…
“…You okay?”
“E-Eh!? A-Ah, I’m fine, ahahaha!”
“…”
As we begin to walk out of the cafe, a silence grows between us. Not the warm silence I had begun to love, but one of my own making. I’m not even paying attention to where we’re going, I’m just mindlessly following Ryo while my brain taunts me with its true feelings.
Eventually, Ryo comes to a stop and I look up. We’re in a completely lifeless area. It’s immediately obvious that we’re the only people here. Why…
“…Sorry. I needed to find somewhere quiet. I don’t think I’d be able to do this otherwise,” Ryo says with an unusual uncertainty in her tone.
“…?”
“I can’t… say the words I want to say, so-“
Abruptly walking up to me, I feel scared for some reason, and immediately close my eyes. A warm feeling on my hands gives me the courage to open them. Ryo’s… holding my hand… and she’s… really red…
“D-Do you… like this?” she's barely able to ask.
“A-Ah…” I’m too embarrassed to speak, so I simply nod my head yes. Ryo then takes a few steps closer to me. Our faces are mere inches away from each other…
“D-Do you…” She can’t even bring herself to ask the words, she’s so red…
But…
I know what she’s asking…
“…Y-Yes…” I say with a face that I'm sure is as equally red as hers.
Our fingers still interlocked and our faces both bright red, Ryo slowly inches her face towards mine, giving me every opportunity to dodge. I simply stare into her golden eyes, only now realizing how much love is held in them. Have I been too scared to look into her eyes the whole time?
“Ah-mmph-“
Before I have the chance to think any more, her lips press against mine and I feel my heart begin to race.
This is… actually happening…
This… is… actually…
…Despite my galloping heart, my chest begins to tighten more than it has all day. It’s so hot… I feel like I’m burning… It hurts… And before I can do anything to stop it, tears begin pouring out of my eyes.
Ryo immediately pulls away. “B-Bocchi?? I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-“
“I-It’s not you…” Those were the only words I could manage to say normally before I start to sob. My chest hurts and my brain is pumping out thoughts I wish I never had. I immediately clutch at my head, hoping somehow to keep my thoughts in, but it just makes it hurt even more. “I can’t… I can’t do this…”
“B-Bocchi…”
Ryo looked genuinely concerned for me, and angry at herself for not being able to help more, but I couldn’t think straight enough to reassure her.
“H-How…” I let out.
“Eh?”
“…H-How could you ever like me ?”
No matter how desperately I tried to stop myself, I began to divulge the ugliest thoughts I kept hidden in the back of my mind…
“…Th-That album… the moment you listen to it, you’ll hate me… Y-You’ll realize how obsessed I am with numbers… B-But… I-I don’t have the strength to pursue my own creativity… I-I’m gonna keep doing covers of songs I don’t even like just for the serotonin boost… I-If I’m not working on the next viral song, I’m completely worthless… A-And I-I could never run from my origins, it’s the only place that I can hide… B-Because I’m shallow, completely and utterly. I abandon my own creativity in favor of praise, I-I’m as greedy as they get! I-I’m… I’m everything that you hate , so… how… how could you kiss me… how could you ever have feelings for someone like me!?”
I'm screaming while sobbing at this point, but Ryo remains unphased. While I'm still breaking down, she walks up to me and wraps her arms around me, pulling me into a tight embrace.
“…N-Now you’re pitying me?”
“…Breathe.”
“E-Eh?”
Her response is said so calmly that I'm at a loss for words. I just screamed at her, and yet… she still has such a warmth in her tone?
“…I’m not as good at this as Nijika, and I don’t have Ikuyo’s positivity, but… I’ll stay with you, so just breathe.”
“Y-You’re just… pitying…”
“You should know well enough by now - that’s way too much work for me.”
“…”
I don't have the strength to argue. I begin to take deep breaths like she instructed, and slowly I start to feel like I can control my body again. I just begin to cry the rest of my tears out leaning on her shoulder.
“…Feel a little better?”
“…” I don't respond, but I try to nod my head.
“…Can I tell you something I haven’t told anyone?”
I'm almost suspicious of that question. “…N-Nijika?”
“Not even her,” she reassures me.
“…M-Mm.”
“…I’m a total workaholic, at least in terms of creative pursuits. Do you remember what I said the last time we were out together? ‘Abandoning your uniqueness is equivalent to dying.’ Well… my brain takes it a step further - if I’m not using my creativity, I’m not really living. That’s why I’m always up late working on songs… because if I don’t, I don’t even feel like I should be living.”
“…Even then, at least you’re using your creativity…”
“…You’re more than guitarhero.”
“E-Eh?”
“You’re Hitori Goto. You’re Bocchi. You’re the lyricist of Kessoku Band.”
“T-That’s not… I-I’m not as amazing as you…”
“…Do you remember when I told you about how I quit my old band?”
“…”
“I thought no one would ever want my creativity again, that I was completely worthless. If Nijika hadn’t found me… I don’t know. But, even when she did, it wasn’t until I saw your lyrics that I began to feel that spark again.”
“You’re just-“
“I’m not lying. Without your lyrics, our songs wouldn’t exist.”
“…B-But… I-I’m still greedy…”
“Did you forget who you’re talking to? I want my creativity kept intact, but I also wanna be able to buy anything. I think I’m as greedy as they get.”
“…Kinda sounds like we’re just two greedy workaholics.”
“Maybe. But… I had fun today, even when we weren’t doing anything music related.”
“…”
“I think the girl called Bocchi has a lot of value outside of being guitarhero… That girl that no one else can see, but a select few… She’s my favorite.”
“…Is it really okay?”
“What?”
“For me… to love you?”
“…I-It would make me happy, so…” Ryo says, a new blush forming.
I timidly pull away from her embrace, but not enough to break it… Just enough to see her face. It may be the most gentle face I’ve ever seen from her.
“I’m sorry… I-I ruined our moment…” I say, looking down.
“I-I mean, we can just… try again, right?”
“…I wanna hear you say it first…” I'm being pouty, but I'm too exhausted to care.
Ryo looks uneasy, but eventually closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, before opening them with determination.
“…B-Bocchi… H-Hitori Goto… I-It doesn’t matter… You’re the one who inspires me most… a-and I… love you.”
“R-Ryo…”
“I-I’m not saying that aga-MMPH”
Before she can even finish, I begin to give her a kiss of my own. It’s short, but exactly what I need to clear the doubts out of my mind for now.
“I-I love you too.”
Ryo still has a faint blush on her face, but she gives me a smile anyways. As I begin to feel my heart race again, I start saying whatever comes to mind… “I-I might be needy, you know…”
“Mm?”
“I’m gonna wanna hold your hand… a-and hug you… k-kiss you… a-a-a-and cuddle… I’m gonna be really annoying…”
“…I-I have a hard time doing things like that, but… i-if you start it, I’ll always let you.”
“…I-I’m gonna text and call you more often.”
“I was kind of hoping for that,” she says with a smirk.
“W-What about Kita??”
“I’ll talk to her if I need to, you don’t need to worry about it.”
“B-But…”
“I promise.”
The warmth in her eyes makes me feel like I could melt…
“…O-Okay.”
“…Is that everything?” she asks with a smile.
“E-Eh? I-I don’t know, I probably have a lot more bad traits…”
“No, those were all pretty cute.”
“WHA-“ My face turns bright red in an instant. She’s never called me cute…
“Hehe, your blushing face is cute too.”
“S-Stop… I-I’m gonna melt…”
Her face turns a little more serious. “…There’s one thing I think you got wrong.”
“E-Eh?”
“When Nijika showed me guitarhero videos, I always thought… the girl really wanted to be seen for who she really was. Getting to know you, the real Bocchi… that’s when I… A-Anyway, I like knowing ‘Bocchi’ way more than ‘guitarhero’, so… do your next video because you want to, not because you want to feel seen. I… already see you.”
“Ryo…”
“Agh, you are never getting anything this sappy out of me after today.”
“Ehehe… Guess I’ll have to treasure it~”
“A-Ah…”
Hehe, get a taste of your own blush medicine, Ms. Yamada!
H“…Hey, I don’t really wanna do anything else. Can we find somewhere to sit?”
“Mm. Follow me.”
It's just a few minutes away to a bench with a great view of the sky. The sun seems to be breaking through the clouds now…
The walk was a nice moment for us both to collect ourselves. We were both a little emotional, so it was nice to start to feel normal again. Of course, I never let go of her hand, and she never stopped holding it tightly the entire way.
Once we're both seated, I lean my head on her shoulder. I’ve seen Nijika do this before, so I don’t think she’s too phased, but…
“C-Can you…” I begin to ask.
“…?”
“C-Can you wrap your arm around me?”
“A-Ah.”
Picking up on this being something to commit to memory, she quickly wraps her arm around my back and holds me tight.
“Hehehe…”
“…What are you laughing about?” she asks in a teasing tone.
“I-I’m just happy that… m-my g-g-g-girlfriend’s keeping me safe…” I try to fire back.
“Hehe… Well, I’m happy my girlfriend is helping me feel so warm.”
“…U-Um, can we…”
“Hm? Ohhh, I forgot you’re already addicted to my kiss.”
Giving me a smug smile, I can’t help but turn a little red as she inches her face closer to mine. Our lips soon meet, but this time she holds it. The warmth of her lips recharges me like a battery, as if this kiss carries all the words she’s too embarrassed to say. After she begins to pull away, I immediately begin to cuddle with her. She’s hesitant to do anything at first, but eventually decides to rub my head, running her fingers through my hair. It feels so nice…
“For all your talk of your seishun complex, you sure have some lovey-dovey thoughts up there, huh?”
“E-Eh!? N-No, I just…”
“It’s okay. This side of you is cute too.”
“W-Why do you keep calling me that??”
“Huh? Do you not like it?”
“I-It’s not that, it’s just…” It keeps sending my heart into overdrive!
“I like the face you make when I say it.”
“Y-You… I-Is teasing me really that fun?”
“Yeah.”
“N-Ngh…” I don't have any defenses against this girl, so I try to change the subject. “…Th-Thanks for paying earlier today.”
“I did owe you.”
“I’ll pay for some dates in the future-“
“Oh, thank god.”
“…A-At least try to save some money…”
“Mmmmmmm, I’ll try.”
“…”
…
“…Wanna stay over?” Ryo asks as if it were the most normal thing in the world.
“E-Eh?”
“I don’t… want you to leave.”
“R-Ryo!” My heart seriously can’t take unexpected critical hits like that! “…I-I’ll call my parents.”
“Mm.”
“…Hey, I was thinking about the problems you were having with your current song. Could… I help? I-I know I just do covers, b-but I’ve gotten pretty decent at getting the sound I want and-"
“Mm, that would be great, thanks,” she says with a gentle smile.
“O-Oh! O-Okay!”
“I’m excited to see what guitarhero can bring to the Kessoku Band table.”
“I-I’ll try not to let you down!”
“Wanna listen to that album tonight too?”
“O-Oh… S-Sure.”
“…If you’re still scared, then I’ll hold your hand the entire time.”
“…O-Okay.”
…
“…Is there anything else you want to do tonight?” Ryo asks.
“E-Eh?”
“A maiden invites you into her home and you don’t even think of that meaning anything?”
“Huh?”
I'm completely lost until I see a devilish grin appear on her face. “My parents are working nights tonight, you know.”
It hits me, and red instantly coats my face. “R-R-R-R-R-RYO!!! TH-TH-THAT’S-…”
I want to cover my face with my hands, but they're currently wrapped around my devilish girlfriend.
“Hooooh? What did you think of?”
“W-What do you mean!? I-I-I-I thought of exactly what you wanted me to!!”
“Ehhhhhh? I didn’t really have anything in mind, though…”
“Wha- N-No, you definitely said it in a way that… th-that…”
“Hmmmmm, I wonder what it says about my girlfriend that she had a thought so embarrassing that she couldn’t say it on the very first day of dating?”
“Y-You!!! Y-You’re doing this on purpose, aren’t you!?”
“Hehe.”
“M-Mmph!” Instantly burying my head into her body, I don’t give her satisfaction of seeing my blush. After a few seconds, she starts running her hand through my hair again.
“It’s really your fault for being this cute.”
“Th-That’s not…”
“You were fun before, but now I wanna see parts of you that you don’t show anyone else.”
“R-Ryo…”
S-So, it’s more than her just wanting to tease me?
“…I’ll try to do the same,” Ryo says in a soft voice.
“…You already did. You told me something you’ve never told anyone else.”
“…Yeah.”
As I peek upwards, I see her staring into the distance of the setting sun. This is my chance! I instantly move upwards and give her a light kiss on the cheek. Her concentration broken, a light shade of red begins to permeate on her face. “W-What was that for?”
“C-Cuz you looked pretty!”
“…I-I don’t… know how to respond to that.”
“Th-Then… j-just kiss me, ehehe~”
Fighting through her embarrassment, Ryo follows my instructions and gives me another love-filled kiss. Once she pulls away, I rest my head on her shoulder once more.
“…C-Can we stay like this for a while?” I timidly ask.
“Mm-hm.”
“Th-Thank you.”
…
“…I-I love you, Ryo. I-I-I’m so happy that today turned out the way it did!”
“…You’re not mad that I overstressed you?” She asks with a tinge of regret. She still feels bad for earlier...
“That wasn’t your fault! But… I think it was necessary… c-cuz now I’m happy without any thoughts holding me back.”
“Heh, good.”
…
“…D-Don’t forget to say it back,” I say in a pout.
“Hm? O-Oh, sorry… I love you too, Bocchi.”
“Ehehe~”
The night continues. I get permission to stay over from my parents, so we listen to music and work on a song, before spending an entire night cuddling in bed. She doesn’t know what she’s talking about, she’s great at cuddling once she feels comfortable, hehe. I hope… we spend way more nights cuddling together like this one~