Chapter Text
Travis reaches for the bell of the Fisher residence,he’s uncertain,his hands are sweating,yet he rings the bell anyways.
He had found where Sal lived by asking a few locals.That little gnome sure knew a lot of people didn't he?
A man of average height opened the door,Sally's same blue hair and blue eyes met his gaze.
"must be his dad" he thought
“hi sir is Sal home?I need to talk to him about…whatever,is he home?”
After what Travis likes to call "the bathroom accident" he…didn't feel the same.
Sally face was so fucking sweet.
Why couldn't he be a horrible person?
Maybe then Travis would have had an actual reason to hate him.
“oh sal is at Larry’s at the moment,you can join them if you want,he lives in the basement I believe,you should find Lisa cleaning in the corridors go and ask her”
‘Wow he lives in the basement.how fitting for a rat such as himself’ Travis thought.
“No sir i-i just need to talk with sal,but i can come back another day”
'i sound so fucking pathetic.looking for sal like a fucking child looks for his mom'
“no no i can call them,i’m sure he won’t mind coming here to talk to you,come in little guy” Travis chose to ignore the last 2 words.
Travis wanted to leave so badly,but it was like his feet moved on their own,he entered the house and sat on the couch,next to an orange fur ball which(Travis thought)was a cat.
What was he doing?He didn't even ask for permission,he's being waaaay too comfortable.
Mr Fisher picked up the phone and dialed a number,someone on the other side picked up.
“Hey son, there's someone here who would like to talk with you.No he said he only wants to talk with you.Come on Sal you and Larry can hang out some other time ok?Ok see you soon then”
He hung up the phone and turned around to face the boy “he’ll be here soon”.
After a few minutes,which for Travis felt like hours,someone opened the apartment door,and there he was,Sally face.
“Hey son i’ll be in my room working a bit,you guys talk about whatever teenagers talk about these days ok?”
Sal gave a quick glance at Travis before answering with a very dubious “sure…”
Mr Fisher left the room,and the two were left alone.
“um hi?”
“why are you here”
there wasn’t anger in his voice,it was more like a mix of confusion and skepticism,he was also squinting,or so it looked like.
“jeez i can’t even pay you a visit?”
“well it would be normal if we were even remotely friends"
“Hey you’re the one who had that whole conversation about talking about my feeling with you and shit so don’t act surprised all of a sudden”
Sal widened his eyes under the mask,despite how creepy and amusing it was,Travis couldn’t help but think it was really cool in a way
“oh.That”
“Yes Sally face.That”
“well i didn’t actually think you’d listen to me”
“then maybe you should think before you speak,freak”
"Can you let me finish?I wanted to say that's it's nice to see you regardless"
'Nice to see him'? Travis found that extremely hard to believe.
"Well I'm clearly not welcomed here"
The blond got closer to the door so he could leave,but Sal,who was still on the doorstep,stopped him.
“Is that a new bruise?”
Travis froze,not really knowing how to answer,I mean how does someone answer a question like this?He knew Sal was straight forward but that was borderline invasive.
“Why do you care?”
"for the same reason I talked with you that day in the bathroom,I don't hate you Travis"
"you should tho I treat you like shit "
"I don't think you want me to hate you"
a long pause
Travis tried to keep eye contact but he was the first to look away in the end.
"I think we should go to my bedroom,I don't want my noisy neighbors to hear"
Travis hesitated,but eventually let Sal lead him to his room.
Travis thought Sal's room was an extension of him, everything in there just screamed his name,the posters,the blankets that smelled like him,his dirty hoodies and ....underwear.gross.
"sorry it's messy as fuck i know"
"yeah that's one way to put it I guess"
Sally took the dirty clothes from the bed and put them in a laundry basket,he then made the bed,all while Travis stood there awkwardly gazing around Sal's room to find something he could focus on to calm his heartbeat a little,but everywhere he looked,a little piece of Sally's personality stared back, all of a sudden the ground looked really interesting.
"Here,you can sit on the bed once you've stopped admiring my floor"
Travis froze and looked up,Sal had undone his ponytails,and now his long blue wavy hair touched his shoulders.
"nice hair there Sally face"
Travis spoke before thinking,and the words came out on their own,he blushed.
"Who's the one speaking before they think now?" Sal said, almost reading in his mind.
"shut up"
Come to think about why did he say that?It very much sounded like flirting,which Travis had 100% not intended to.
He sat on the bed next to Sal.
"So why are you here then"
he tried looking Sally in the eyes but it was futile
"I already told you"
"Did something happen?"
"I already fucking told you Sally face."
"Travis you can talk to me for fuck's sake.if you came here there's clearly something going on"
"what if I just wanted to see you"
"Travis,i know I told you you could hang out with me,but I didn't exactly mean presenting yourself in front of my doorstep"
tears were forming in Travis' eyes,and with every blink they were a step closer to falling.
"I'm sorry ok?I've had a shitty week and….I don't know I remembered the conversation we had in the bathroom i thought ....I don't know what I thought" He exclaimed.
It was partially true.Summer break had only started a week ago,which meant he would be spending more time with is dad at home, it's not like he beat him every day,but a slightly mean comment from him(which seemed to be his dad's few methods of communication)would be enough to bring a frown on his face for the rest of the day,they didn't actually hurt by the comments themselves, it's just he was being mean for no reason,it was more the reason(or lack there of) than the outcome that had an impact on the boy.
Sally caressed his back,Travis hid his face in his hands, partially because of his red cheeks, Partially because of his tears
"shhhhh…it's ok Travis i'm not mad it's just-weird for you to come to my house out of the blue you know?Maybe you could give me a call next time,I'm always here if you want to talk about anything"
Travis nodded,while being embraced in Sally's arms.They stayed like that for a while, despite the burning sun outside,and despite certain passed events.
Travis rang the bell of the fisher's apartment.
Sally opened the door,looking a little more upbeat than usual.
"Oh hey there Travis come in,I'm baking a cake,maybe you could help?"
Travis stepped in and was immediately greeted by the smell of flour and chocolate.
"how much do you know about baking?"
"well not a lot.My dad isn't exactly a baking type of person"
Sal nodded
"mine neither,but I do make some cakes once in a whi-AND YOU GET OFF THE KITCHEN COUNTER" the orange fur ball quickly obliged and opted to sit on the couch instead.
Sal was wearing a cutesy apron with flowers embroidered on it,after looking in one of the cupboards he threw another apron at Trevis,this one was(thank god)a plain white one.
"Do i really need to wear this?"
"yes unless you want to stain your clothes and your father to know you baked a cake with someone"
"Why would he care?"
"A dude baking a cake with another dude?pretty homoerotic if you ask me"
Travis felt like he was about to throw up.He thought maybe his face being red was a symptom.
"shit-i'm so sorry maybe that was a bit far"
Travis managed to whisper a "it's fine"
"Ok since you're apparently a baking disaster you can pass me the ingredients and pour them into the bowl as I mix,cool?"
"sure.but I'm not a disaster"
"I said you are a baking disaster"
"how can you be sure I'm not good at it?I never tried"
"ok look, i don't have many ingredients so I only have one shot at baking this cake.so I'm sorry but you're not gonna find that out today"
Travis stayed silent and let Sally win the argument, since there was no point in him defending himself.
"Travis, can you get me some milk? it's in the fridge"
Travis opened the fridge,it was full of bottles of alcohol,some stronger like vodka,some lighter like beer
"Sally do you drink alcohol?"
Sal stopped mixing the chocolate cream
"No.they're all my dad's" his whole body froze up,a type of body language Travis knew all too well.
He took a better look.some of them were half way through,some of them were still sealed while others were almost empty.He got the milk and closed the fridge.
"kinda awkward isn't it?"Travis said
"He mostly drinks in the middle of the night,thinking i can't hear him"his tone was somewhat cold,almost like he was schooling Travis,or Mr Fisher. He couldn't tell.
"yeah sorry I shouldn't have brought it up"
"no problem man it's fine I mean-you were just curious.That's all"
"I know how you feel"
"yeah Travis,ok,I know. Just pour some milk in and then put it back where it came from will you?"Travis followed Sal's instructions.
Despite that little hiccup they ultimately had fun,the cake came out looking pretty good and even tasted pretty good.
"it's been a while since I baked with someone.thank you Travis"
He blushed a little.
"no problem I mean,I had fun too"
Sal stared at him a bit before speaking again
"I feel like I saw another part of you today"
He Got closer to Travis' face and brushed it gently with his finger.
"You should really go clean your face tho,and I need to clean my mask.you can go to the bathroom while I stay in the kitchen"He showed him the way there.
Travis washed his face, the foundation he had put on to hide the bruise was also washed away with the flour and chocolate cream.
He stared in the mirror:his black eye had basically almost faded,but now there was another purple bruise under his other eye to match.
It was a different bruise than the one Sally pointed out the month before.That one was a lot more superficial,Travis could tell how long it would take for a bruise to heal,and this brand new one seemed like one of the bad ones.
He couldn't remember why his dad hit him when he got it,each beating melted into the previous in Travis's mind,there was no point in remembering each one in detail anyways.
He came out of the bathroom,and back into the kitchen, Sally was putting his mask back on,or at least trying to
"do you need help?"
Sal hesitated,and then nodded.
Travis did it without much trouble.
He turned back to face him
"thank you Travis"
he stared at his face.
"Shit-again?is he ever gonna stop?"
"doesn't seem like he's planning to"
"Do you at least put some ointment or cream on them?"
"we don't have any at home"
"then you should go to a pharmacy and buy some"
Travis shifted his weight from foot to foot
"whatever,just sit on the couch while I go looking for some in the bathroom ok?"
Travis nodded and sat on the couch.
After a while Sal came back with a tube,he then took a look in the refrigerator and took out a bag of ice.
The ice felt really cold on the bruise,and it hurt like hell but Travis tried to keep a cool attitude (no pun intended). The cream was also pretty cold but not as much as the ice so it was bearable.
"dad used to always patch me up like this after I got or was given a bruise"
He then put a bandaid on it.
"the bandaid doesn't do anything but it's more of a psychological thing"
Travis didn't quite know what to say. He punched him a few months ago and there he is now.Patching him up,it was weird,it almost felt like an oxymoron.
"shit I probably should go now"
"bye Travis.Take care of yourself man"
his face heated,a lot more than usual
"Thank you…man"
He closed the door behind him.
There he was,in front of the Fisher residence,again.
He had been there so many times his feet practically led themselves there.
What looked like a very tired Sal opened the door
“oh.Hi Travis.i thought i told you to call before coming”
“well i would have if my father hadn’t gotten rid of our phone”
Sal nodded,then made space for Travis to enter.
They both sat on the couch,Sal seemed lost in thought while he gazed at the black tv screen,the air was so dense you could practically cut it with scissors.
“I know I'm probably the last person you want to hear this from but…what happened?”
Sal shook his head,almost like he had just been woken up from a deep slumber
“oh um yeah me and my dad…argued”
°°°°°
“argued” didn’t exactly describe the scene,they were fighting,both of them speaking louder and louder so that they could be heard “JUST LOOK AT MY FUCKING FACE,LOOK AT MY DISGUSTING FUCKING FACE”Sal had bursted out of his mouth
.That was Henry’s last straw,and he left the house,probably to go to some dirty ass bar to drink shitty alcohol and talk with strangers about how his son is ‘hard to handle’ and how he ‘doesn’t understand his pain’.
but he couldn’t tell Travis all of that,could he?
He has it so much worse than Sal does after all.
“about what?”
“my face”
Travis clearly grew more uncomfortable,but he didn’t care.He needed to talk with someone and Travis was the only person he felt he could trust.Larry was at the mall with his mom,ash was probably sleeping and Todd wasn't answering the phone.
He almost thought about calling Travis right after the fight.
Almost
Why did he think of Travis of all people?maybe because he would understand him better?Sal couldn't tell.
“i usually don’t wear my mask around the house,but my dad doesn't like that.Probably because then he can’t pretend to have a normal child with a perfectly normal face”
Travis didn’t dare to say a word,he just let Sal speak.
“he doesn’t even dare to look at it.He’s my Fucking dad. He should be proud to look at his son so why - ”
His voice cracked on that last sentence,and he knew the tears were coming.
"- why is he so afraid of me?"
“He's an asshole. That's why”
Travis saying that did it for Sal. he broke into a laughter that almost immediately turned into crying and he collapsed.
“i hate my face.i hate it so fucking much.why can’t it be normal?Do i not deserve to have a normal life?”
Travis did the only thing he knew would comfort him and embraced Sal in a hug
“i know how you feel Sal.Believe me i do”
“i know.”
Sal knew Travis’ situation and being so upset about something so small in front of him felt so pretentious.
“Travis,i want to show you my face”
it came out so suddenly,so much so that even Sal acted surprised after he had elaborated his own words.I mean- they had been on good terms for a little over a month tops.
“ wait right now?”
“yes,then you can choose if you want to come back or not”
Sal started to undo the back of his mask,first the strap on top then the bottom one,then he slowly revealed his face to Travis.
Sal thought he would act disgusted and storm out the room,but instead he said:
“i can actually see your face moving”
He looked at it,like he was memorizing every scar,every dark spot.
“it’s….beautiful, in it’s own twisted and unique way”
That just made Sal cry harder,in response Travis hugged him tighter.And they both felt like in moments like these, words would be superficial.
°°°°°
Travis was about to faint,because of a little someone called Sal Fisher whom almost gave his a stroke because of his beautiful fucking face.
He’s not supposed to feel like this.
The son of a preacher is a Fag.
How fucking ironic.
They were so close they could feel each other’s breaths,Travis could hear Sally’s fast paced heartbeat but he really hoped he couldn’t hear his because then Sal would actually think Travis was having a heart attack.
He took Sal's face into his hands so he could take a better look,so he could absorb every single detail down to the smallest of scars ,until his gaze fell onto his lips.
Don’t do it Travis
Despite the scars around them,they looked soft.
If you do it He’s going to end you.
they got closer
you don’t want this Travis.
and closer
He doesn’t want this.
pause
Travis jumped on his feet
“i’m sorry Sal i-”
He tried to effortlessly cover his flustered face,the cross on his chest growing hotter and hotter until Travis could feel it dip into his flesh.
“it’s not about your face i promise i just-”
He couldn’t end the sentence before shutting the door behind him.He could swear he heard a certain someone calling out his name from inside,he ran to the elevator,it’s dark outside,which means he’s late,which means his dad is going to be mad.
Good.He felt like this beating was deserved.
Travis came back home in a hurry. He stood near the kitchen counter,one hand closed in a fist,the other with a bottle in hand,but the thing is,Travis was happy,he didn’t let his sinful thoughts win,he had control over them after all,right?and the fact he came ba k there confirmed it.
"Where have you been"
Travis knew he would get the same treatment no matter his answers,so he just made something on the spot.
"i went on a walk, it's sunny outside,so i thought-"
"son, truly you do nothing but think and yet you couldn't find a better excuse?all that thinking and non of it is smart "
Travis didn't even try to fight back,even though neither party had said it out loud,the conversation was over.
"you know what?i don't care we're you've been,all i know is that a lesson is more than needed"
He heard a bottle hit the wall near him and then everything went blurry,each hit he took he would recite a prayer,which only seemed to anger his father more.
“reciting prayers won't save you from the wrath of god if you don't really mean them..DON’T YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I WORRIED FOR YOU?”
He said a lot more,but that’s the only thing Travis could hear,and remember afterwards,for what it's worth.
it was rare for him to be left this messed up.
After a few attempts he managed to get on his feet but every fiber, every cell in him was hurting,he eventually managed to drag himself to his pathetic little room,quite fitting for someone like him. Only then,did He let it out.
i deserve this
i deserve this
i deserve this
you don’t
A familiar voice echoed in his mind:Sal.
He was the reason he could barely stand up and yet all he could think about was him.
No,Sal isn’t the reason
He ’s the reason, not Sal,he would help him if he could.