Chapter Text
So, my job was surprisingly fine with my philanthropic mission to save the gorillas that kept me from my job for a year. Weird right? It also left me having to pretend that I knew random junk about gorillas. Did you know that gorillas supplement their diet with cow’s blood? That is why they have such big canines! Yeah, that is probably complete and utter bullshit, but people believe me when I say it.
Don’t blame me. Maybe they should read more.
It has been like this for two years now. I haven’t heard from Thedas….Solas…in two years. Part of me thought that at some point he’d come back….or that Elias would figure out how to reopen the rift…It took me about six months to put aside that fantasy. I used to just hang out at that coffee shop where I popped back into the world…just in case. It was honestly, pretty pathetic.
Then, one morning, I’m sitting at my desk doing my normal boring work when one of my coworkers comes up to me. “Hey, Elaine there is a guy standing outside asking anyone who passes by if they know who you are. He has a really epic moustache and sort of looks like a fashionable renaissance festival reject.”
It’s Dorian. It has to be. I come up with a brilliant excuse. “I have to go. That’s one of the gorilla people I was working with. The gorillas must need me! I’ll be back eventually. Thanks!” I grab my bag and dash out the door. I’m still brilliant, have no fear.
Sure enough, leaning up against the wall of my office building is the most beautiful man from Thedas. “What have I done to deserve such an unexpected visit from such a handsome man?” I smile as the door closes behind me.
Dorian comes over and gives me a hug, lifting me up off the ground. “Hello, again darling. Did you miss me?”
I kiss his cheek, “Only every moment of my life, Dorian.” He sets me down, but doesn’t let go of me.
“I didn’t even get to see you off, Elaine.” He pulls me into another crushing hug. “I’ve missed you terribly. I was delighted to discover that you were not dead.”
I begin to realize that Dorian wasn’t here last time…”How did you find me? I had thought I’d be sealed away forever!”
“Well, you see…”
“Maker’s Breath! Damn it all to the Void! She has to be!” A handsome voice is echoing once familiar curses off the walls of the alley besides my office building. “Dorian!” He turns the corner, “I know she is here!” He stops dead in his tracks when he looks up and his golden eyes meet mine. It’s the second time I’ve seen Cullen without full armor. He’s in black leather britches and a cream billowy shirt with a burgundy jacket.
He almost drops whatever is in his hand. “It’s you.” He breathes.
“Cullen?” I gasp. I can’t believe he’s here. There is no way he’d just up and leave the Inquisition. It’s my first inkling that something must be wrong back there, but I push it aside for the time being. I start to run toward him…but…stop myself a few feet away…it’s been two years…what if his feelings have changed. I mean, I love him. So much. I missed our talks. I missed his smile. I missed him. He has occupied this place in my mind as the unattainable perfection that I stupidly cast aside…for a crazy person, no less.
Cullen closes the gap between us in just a few steps and pulls me into a strong embrace. One of his hands cradles my head and the other holds my lower back. I have forgotten how much bigger he is than me. He puts some room between us and brushes my hair from my face. He almost looks enchanted. Dorian coughs a bit and he quickly lets me go, “You um…look well Elaine.” We are, after all, on a busy street…it doesn’t stop me from keeping ahold of his hand.
Dorian is tickled pink. I think he wanted this for me for a very long time….whatever this is.
Why are they here? Not Elias. Something is wrong and I know we can’t ignore it. “What happened?”
They pass a look as if neither wants to be the one to tell me. So, it must be bad.
Cullen speaks. “Is there somewhere more private that we may speak?” It must be very bad.
I sigh. “Okay, I’ll take you to my place. I moved out on my own! Just, don’t freak out.” We walk to my car, I unlock it and open the passenger side doors for them. “Get in.” Dorian is a bit fearless and just jumps into the back seat. Cullen circles the car like it will somehow grant him understanding. “Cullen, just go sit down.” He does, but he looks incredibly hesitant. I take the driver’s seat and put my keys in. “You’re killing me guys. Close the doors.” The doors slam shut. “Seatbelts on.” I demonstrate with my own and they follow suit. “Okay, just…trust me.”
I turn the ignition on and the car starts to vibrate and, per usual, my radio starts blasting. “Sorry.” I mumble turning down the music. Cullen quickly scramble around for something to grasp. Dorian laughs a bit, “How delightful!”
We start making our way back to my little house. “So, instead of magic we have electricity. It runs my car and basically anything else you can think of. It’s not unnatural. It’s just different. Cullen you’re stressing me out!” He does his best to pretend to relax in the seat beside me. I hold out my right hand for him and he grabs it in his left, squeezing harder than he probably means to.
The drive is pretty short only fifteen minutes or so. They both look intrigued by my little cottage. I let them inside, “Welcome to my home, gentlemen. It’s not much, but it’s mine.”
Cullen looks charmed as he wanders around the house, like it’s almost a little dream, maybe he has missed me like I’ve missed him. Dorian pops in and out of the rooms, “It looks like you, Elaine.” I’m really not sure what that means.
I drop off my bag in my office and go back to the kitchen to put on a kettle. If I know anything, it is that these men enjoy some tea. I’m sure their trip here…and whatever made them come….could use some tea therapy.
The kettle whistles and I grab down my teas and three brightly colored mugs. “Tea?” The two tall men come back into my kitchen and fix their drinks. I sit on the sofa and wait for them to join me. Once they are settled, one on each side of me, I ask again, “What happened?”
Dorian shifts to face me, placing a hand on my knee. “I’ll give you the short version. We won the battle against Corypheus and saved Thedas. Solas disappeared immediately after the battle. No goodbye or explanation, just poof gone.” Not unusual…. “He was going to be judged for his kidnapping of the Inquisitor’s sister, as well as general traitorous behaviors. Your brother was livid when he escaped from the battlefield.”
I had forgiven Solas for his abandoning me about a year after being back. He had always promised to make sure that I was safe…and that is what he did…I guess. But, I don’t love him anymore. The ring on my finger, while permanent, holds no special meaning for me now. I tilt my head to the side…I guess Elias was really angry.
Cullen breaks in. “That’s not why, Elaine. You should know better than anyone that Solas was, evasive during his time in the Inquisition. Recently, we discovered why.”
Dorian squeezes my knee. “Honey, he was lying about who he is. He is one of the ancient Elvhen Gods. He is Fen’Harel. After he left us, somehow he gained back his godly power and has started an uprising. All elves can cast now and they are amazingly strong. He is leading them in taking back Thedas for the glory of Elvhenan.”
I start to laugh hysterically. Dorian takes my mug out of my hand before I can spill my tea everywhere. “I knew he was immortal, but...” more laughter, I’m crying I’m laughing so hard. “Of course I was sleeping with the Trickster! All of those random comments. It makes complete sense!”
They’re looking back and forth between each other, trying to figure out what to do. I’m clearly not in my right mind….which, honestly should never have been thought to be the case.
Eventually, I pull it back together. “Seriously, though?” I flop back against the back of the couch. This is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. “He is leading an elven uprising. Solas is leading a war? Our Solas?”
Cullen sighs, “That’s what we thought too. Well, Elias and some of the other members of the inner circle went on various missions to defend against the strange elven army. Solas was there. Elias was injured in their skirmish. We came hoping that you could come back. His healing is still in progress, Anders is hard at work, but if anyone’s presence could help him it’s yours.”
I stand up and pace back and forth in front of the couch. “So, let me get this straight. My ex is an ancient Elvhen God and had started a war across Thedas. He also tried to kill my time twin? This sounds insane. Has he gone crazy? Did he think I would be okay with this!?”
“We don’t think he knows that we have the ability to get to you. With Elias down for the count, the power of the anchor is useless. What Solas forgot was just how wonderful of a mage I am. I figured out a way to create a temporary rift for us.” Dorian sounded very pleased with himself.
I reach over and down my tea. “Well, men. Let’s go save our Inquisitor.”
“I just need a nap first.” Dorian sounds like the living dead. I hadn’t even noticed in all the excitement.
“Dorian used a great deal of energy to get us here. He needs to regenerate before we can attempt to make it back.” Cullen clarifies, looking worried at the mage.
I stand up and take his hands in mine. “Oh, my sweet Tevinter, let’s get you to bed.” I lead him into my larger than necessary bedroom and help him take off his cloak, so that he can be more comfortable in bed. He gets under the blankets and I tuck him in.
“I could get used to this.” He smiles through a yawn and curls up.
I shut the curtains; it is, after all, only around noon. “Good night, Dorian.” I make sure the door is closed behind me so that he’s not disturbed.
Back in the living room, Cullen is standing at my book shelf, skimming my titles with a smile on his face. He picks up a large book that I’ve really almost destroyed in the last two years. “Constellations: Their Locations and Histories.”
I can’t help but like that he found my little secret. “No matter where I am, they remain the same.” My return to the room doesn’t make him jump, instead he just slowly turns toward me, looking apprehensive. I swing my arms around nervously, looking everywhere but at him. What can I say? I missed him.
He takes a few steps toward me. “Elaine…I…”
The Mario Theme song starts playing in my back pocket. This actually makes Cullen look around like we are under attack. I slowly remove my cell from my pants and see that Max is calling. Saved by the ringtone! “I have to take this, one second.” I turn my back…like that’s going to really give me any privacy. “Howdy!”
“You’re still coming tonight, right?” Max asks abruptly. So, I had totally forgotten about the party for Edward. It’s not like he’s in town every day and everyone is gone to be there. Ugh. Honestly, I want to go still….but I don’t know if it’s a great idea with Cullen and Dorian here. But, if they’re here…then I won’t be soon…and I refuse to go away without saying goodbye. All of that is going on in my head, but nothing is coming out verbally. “Lane?! Are you still there?”
“What?! Oh…I….yeah…”
“Yeah, you’re coming? Or Yeah, you’re there.”
“Both. I just….I’m going to be bringing someone…is that okay?” I turn around and look at Cullen who is super confused as to what is going on right now.
“We rented a whole bar. I’m sure there’ll be room.” He says in the dismissive way he does before coming to a halt. “Wait, who are you bringing?”
I let out a shaky breath. “Um….Cullen.” Cullen thinks I’m talking to him and looks at me expectantly. I hold up a hand to signal him to stay quiet.
“You’ve never mentioned a Cullen….is this a recent conquest?” Max is suddenly really worried about me. I haven’t really been out with anyone since I came back.
My nervous laugh starts up. “Oh….no…you’ve definitely heard about Commander Cullen before…”
“Wait. The Commander is here?! You’re screwing around with me, Elaine.”
I put the phone on speaker. “Cullen, say hello to Max, please”
He has no idea what to make of any of this. “Hello?” he says hesitantly, staring at the little piece of metal in my hand. “Elaine, what is this device?”
“Shit! Elaine!” Max starts yelling so loud that my phone is vibrating in my hand. Cullen steps back, clearly startled.
“See you at 7! K, I love you, bye!” I hang up the phone before he can say anything else. “Sorry about that.”
Cullen nervously rubs his neck. “Can you please explain to me what just happened?”
“First of all, that’s a phone. We don’t use crows here, instead we just send our voice through this thing. Secondly, that was my oldest brother, Max. He and his wife and throwing a party because one of our middle brothers, Edward, is home for a bit. I had promised to go, but I can’t rightly leave you here…and Dorian is practically comatose. So, we’re going to a party.” I flop down on the couch and rest my face in my hands. This is a terrible idea. I mean, the whole family knows about everything from Thedas and whatever, but actually bringing Cullen out is not the best idea I’ve ever had.
“So, I’m going to meet your family?” He says, slowly processing everything I just blurted out.
“Yep. All of them. Don’t worry, all my siblings know about where I was two years ago. I think Martin was pretty sure I had finally gone crazy. He’s going to flip out.”
I feel the couch shift and Cullen sits beside me. “Your hair is different.” He mumbles sadly, running a hand hesitantly though the ends of my locks. “Still lovely, but different.”
“Oh, yeah.” I sit up and run a hand through my now just barely shoulder length hair. “About six months after I got back I chopped it all off. You know how after a bad break up you just want a change? I needed it to be gone. It reminded me of who I was in Thedas and I didn’t get to be her anymore.”
He drops his hand back into his lap, like my hair was too hot to handle. “Elaine, I’m so sorry. I promised you that I wouldn’t let you be taken from me again. I failed. I didn’t see the enemy in our midst; my judgement was too clouded.”
“You couldn’t have known. None of us did. Well, Zevran had suspicions, but the Inquisition needed him. I’ve never once blamed you…only myself.” I rest my hand on his wrist and feel a bracelet, so I shift his sleeve to look at it.
“Perhaps I should explain.” He sits back on the couch and runs a hand through his hair. “After Solas came back without you, we were uncertain if you were even still living. Elias was convinced he had taken you away and killed you. I realized that you had left vials of your blood in the Undercroft, so with the help of Grand Enchanter Fiona, we made a phylactery for you. It worked. And I thanked the Maker that you were still alive.”
I laugh, but am seriously disturbed. “You made me a phylactery?”
“Yes, with it the Templars could sense your presence. It’s ultimately how Dorian was able to locate you.” Cullen pulls back his shirt, “Elias made all the Templar leaders wear them. It’s a small amount of your phylactery. That way, all of the trusted Templars could constantly be on the lookout for you, should you arrive back in Thedas.” It’s a glass disk about the size of a quarter, filled with red liquid….um….my blood….attached to a leather band.
“That’s beyond creepy, Cullen.” I move his wrist around making the blood shift this way and that in the glass.
He takes my hand in his. “I have to tell you, Elias wanted to be able to help in the efforts to find you.” That’s nice, so why does he need to be holding my hand to tell me this? “He became a Templar, Elaine.”
“What?!” I shout, pulling myself from his grasp. “How could you let him do that?! After everything that happened to you, you let him join?!”
Cullen just sits there calmly and lets me yell. “You very well know that he would have done it whether or not I decided to help him. I figured that I would be the most conservative trainer he could have. He barely takes any lyrium at all. I made sure of it.”
He’s right. Of course he’s right. There wouldn’t have been a better mentor than Cullen. He is an amazing teacher and could kick Elias’s ass if needed. “You’re right. I’m sorry I yelled.” That awesome self-pity thing comes back. “God, I really screwed up everything. Didn’t I?”
“No, Elaine, it’s not…”
“No, Cullen. I did. If there was a wrong choice to be made. I made it.” He come over to me and hesitantly hugs me. “I’m going to fix all of it. I swear, Cullen.”
“You’re not alone, Elaine.” It’s so nice to be in his arms again. I feel like I fit against him. It’s also super weird for him to be here…in my living room. Our silent hugging starts to get a little long…and I mean…no one is watching, but we really need to figure out what is going on here before the whole lingering embraces thing is acceptable. “Would you care to show me your book of constellations?” he asks softly.
“Of course.” I smile and walk over to retrieve the book.