Chapter Text
"Mm," Rei murmured as he felt a strong stomach ache before feeling puke go up his throat. The black-haired boy jumped out of the tub he was sleeping in, kneeling down in front of the toilet to vomit everything that was accumulating in his throat. He had been sick for two weeks already. Puke wasn’t the worst thing about his sickness; the worst part was not being able to eat absolutely anything, and he knew Kazuki had started to notice. When he felt the puking urges had stopped, he flushed the toilet. He then heard a light knock on the wooden door, followed by his "partner’s" voice. "Rei? Are you alright? Did you throw up again?"
The black-haired boy sighed as he rose from the cold bathroom floor to open the door, his gaze drawn to a pair of deep crimson eyes. Just as he was about to tell the blonde it was none of his business and to fuck off, he felt the puke going up his throat once again, forcing him to quickly kneel down again in front of the toilet. Kazuki came closer, softly stroking Rei’s back in an attempt to comfort him. " Rei… I know you don’t like the idea at all, but I think you should see a doctor." Rei’s father had been really tough with him growing up. He called him weak multiple times when he needed a doctor. Rei remembered clearly the day he broke his leg after successfully killing a whole gang; his father didn’t bat an eye, much less take him to the doctor, despite Rei's begging and complaining about the strong pain. On the contrary, his father even forced him to take multiple jobs with his broken and untreated leg. It was the reason he had a slight limp on his left leg. There was also a time he caught a cold that had him burning in fever, but he still got forced by his father to go on a mission on an extremely rainy night. So that was the reason Rei saw going to the doctor as a sign of weakness.
Even when he ended up getting hurt on a mission, he treated his wounds by himself, like that one time he got shot in the shoulder, and without even showing a slight grimace, he removed the bullet by himself and treated the wound. So Rei shook his head firmly from side to side as a way of saying absolutely not to Kazuki’s proposal of seeing a doctor, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "Rei, your health is way more important than your stupid dignity." Kazuki responded, furrowing his brows. "You think I haven’t noticed you’ve been throwing up like this for weeks now? How do you plan on working like this?"
"My sickness won’t get in the way of job. I’m going to be alright by the time the break is over." Rei said with a serious expression, flushing the toilet once more and rising from the cold tiles of the bathroom floor, leaving Kazuki alone as he exited the bathroom. "That’s not what I meant! Ugh, stupid Rei," Kazuki murmured, getting up from the bathroom floor as well.
Rei had gotten back to his corner in the living room, surrounded by all his video games. He had put on his noise-canceling headphones and looked at the screen without blinking as he played what seemed like a fighting game. Kazuki knew that was Rei’s way of saying he didn’t want to be bothered.
The blonde sighed. Rei had done nothing but throw up over the last few weeks, but he still looked a little bloated, he wondered. It was strange for him to gain weight like that, especially considering Rei exercised every day and had always had a pretty slim complexion. Tough, it appeared that all of his weight had accumulated on his tummy... Had his sickness something to do with it? Kazuki took his phone and quickly Googled Rei’s symptoms, opening up his eyes like plates when the result "cancer" came up on the first page.
When Rei’s head started pounding and aching from looking up at the same screen for hours without resting, he decided to get up to grab a glass of water, he shut down the TV, realizing how dark the apartment was. He came closer to the kitchen, grabbing a glass of water, which he gushed down, before starting to look for Kazuki all over the apartment. Generally, Kazuki would be around him, reading something, doing some work, cooking, or maybe cleaning up Rei’s mess.
It was very rare for Kazuki to take a break, especially so early in the night. He found the blonde in his room, wrapped in a bunch of blankets, biting his nails as he watched something on his phone. "Kazuki?" Rei turned up the light in the dark bedroom, and Kazuki hissed, closing his eyes at the sudden light before jumping out of the mountain of blankets to come closer to Rei. "Rei! You have to read this!" Kazuki practically shoved his phone on his face; "stomach cancer" could be read on the screen. "You have all the early symptoms."
"I don’t have cancer. That’s ridiculous." Rei murmured as Kazuki tried in vain to show him the results of the investigation he had done. Rei just turned his face to the opposite side, finally laying face down on the blonde’s messy bed. "But Rei, you have all the symptoms: recurrent vomiting, nausea, bloating in the stomach area, loss of appetite... Kazuki read all the symptoms out loud, his worry increasing as he kept reading the list.
"I haven’t lost my appetite... actually, I’m really craving some Karashi renkon right now." Rei whispered. Kazuki raised his brow at him. Karashi renkon? The spicy dish? Since he knew Rei, he had always known the younger boy hated spicy dishes... There was a short silence; Rei looked at him without blinking before the blonde resumed his task of reading the symptoms of stomach cancer out loud. Rei sighed before pulling the blonde closer to him, joining their lips in a desperate attempt to shut him up. It perfectly worked; the blonde stopped reading the list to reciprocate the soft kiss.
They had something. something that could be called a relationship. It was a mutual, non-spoken understanding and agreement. They were basically committed on their heads to each other. But it was more of a... sexual? Thing? At least, that's how it started, when Rei confessed to Kazuki that he was a virgin during a round of truth or dare, and his virginity was taken by Kazuki a few hours later. And it resulted in multiple sex sessions when they came back from work with extra energy. But, basically, Kazuki only liked Rei and only liked the idea of being with Rei, and Rei only liked Kazuki and only liked the idea of being with Kazuki. They occasionally shared a little kiss, like a married couple. Kazuki called him "baby" or "honey" sometimes. And Rei loved curling up with Kazuki sometimes (most of the times) on his bed at night when his nightmares were unbearable. And Kazuki held him between his arms, stroking his pretty black hair, as he stroked it, he whispered in his ear that everything would be alright. They would kiss until Rei fell deeply asleep and their lips got swollen from kissing. Despite the fact that they had never formally discussed their relationship, they had come to the conclusion that they were a couple.
Kazuki put his hands on Rei’s waist, moving his kisses from Rei’s lips to his shoulders, his hands traveling down to the black-haired boy’s pants, sliding them down; once Rei was completely naked, Kazuki immediately realized... Rei’s tummy was definitely a lot bigger; there were even small stretch marks decorating the pale skin around his tummy, and it was not that long ago since he last saw Rei naked—almost half a month? The tummy had grown quickly over the course of just half a month. A train of thought passed through Kazuki's mind. He'd seen tummies like Rei's before... on pregnant women; the stretch marks were usually deeper and darker, but they were very similar. But that was not possible, right? Rei was a male; two males could not do such a thing. Right…? There were some cases around the world, and they seemed to be exponentially growing, but... Was there even a chance Rei could be one of those special cases? From his knowledge, there had to be some genetics involved... He had never asked Rei about his father; it was a really sensitive topic.
Rei looked at him, confused, when he realized the blonde was just looking at his body—he hadn't touched him or even spoken in a long time. "Kazuki…?" Kazuki smiled, taking his kisses to Rei’s neck, trying to get his own pants off his legs with kicks; once the pants fell down, Rei tangled his naked legs on Kazuki’s hips. Taking the blonde’s lips on his own, they hungrily kissed each other. The blonde’s thoughts traveled away from the scene. It was cute thinking about it. Pregnant Rei.
Kazuki had already experienced something horrible around pregnancy with his dead girlfriend; she was pregnant, around three months when she died in an explosive attack.
So having a baby made him nervous; also, everything he knew about parenting came from other people's experiences; he had never had a parent figure himself, or at least not a stable one; but he knew very clearly that if he was right about Rei being pregnant, he would protect him and the baby at all costs; he couldn't bear the thought of losing his partner and a child...again.
---
Months had passed, but Rei still refused to go to the doctor. especially since his symptoms had gotten a lot better. At least he had stopped throwing up everything that entered his stomach; on the contrary, he seemed to eat like he was starving, and he had cravings for the weirdest combinations of foods ever, like chocolate on top of hamburger steak. Kazuki felt as if he were spitting on the whole culinary world as he prepared Rei’s chocolate and hamburger steak. His tummy was growing a lot too, but just his tummy.
One day, while the black-haired boy brushed his hair in front of the mirror, not wearing a shirt because he had just finished his daily morning exercise routine, he left out to Kazuki's sight his bulging tummy and his outie belly button with all his stretch marks. He then came closer to Rei, carefully hugging him by the waist. Rei kept brushing and cutting the tips of his black hair. Kazuki came closer to his ear, asking in a soft voice, "Rei, do you think you could maybe be pregnant?" The reply he got was Rei’s death stare; the black-haired boy kicked him out of his room, closing the door on his face. "That’s not even possible, Kurusu! You have completely lost your fucking mind!"
Rei was clearly in denial... and Kazuki just wanted Rei to admit it once and for all before their break was over and they had to go back to their dangerous work.
~~
As usual, Rei spent all day sitting in front of the TV playing video games. That one day, he'd stayed up late playing games; he hadn't even had dinner with Kazuki so he could kill the Ender Dragon for the umpteenth time.When he finally decided to turn down the TV, instead of going to his room or the tub, he went over to Kazuki’s room, getting under the blankets with the blonde. He let out a small whimper of surprise when he felt the crimson-eyed boy’s arm around his body.
"Rei, we have to talk... I know this topic makes you feel uncomfortable, and you always answer no... But... are you sure? You’re not, you know, pregnant?" Kazuki placed his hand on Rei’s tummy, which bulged more with every passing day. It was useless and ridiculous Rei kept denying it; he could literally feel the baby kicking when he placed his hand on the younger boy’s tummy. That was the first time Rei didn’t try to completely deny it and shut Kazuki up about the topic; instead, Rei stayed quiet, there was a deep silence between them. Maybe Rei didn’t try denying it this time because the baby was especially restless that day and kept trying to kick off Kazuki’s hand on Rei’s tummy.
"Kazuki…" Rei’s eyes were bright, and they started pouring tears like rain down his cheeks. Kazuki held him between his arms, stroking his black hair. "Shhhh, baby. I’m here… what are you afraid of?" whispered Kazuki gently. "I’m scared. What if I’m a horrible parent? Just like my dad."
"Rei?"
"My father got pregnant with me on purpose. He forced one of his most powerful soldiers to get him pregnant in order to have his own human weapon and to prove correct his idiot theory that genetics were everything, that you're born with the genes that determine whether you're successful or not...I never had such a thing as a parent figure; I was never somebody’s son; I was treated as just a weapon by him. I don't know how to do this, Kazuki," Rei grumbled angrily. Kazuki caressed his little belly carefully. "Rei, I’m sorry... You’re not alone; I’m with you and always will be. You will not have to raise a child alone. I don't know the first thing about babies... but we can start from zero and work our way up. We will learn together, alright? We're a team!" Rei cried loudly, trying uselessly to clean up his tears as they didn’t stop coming. "And the first thing you should do is see a doctor. We have to check that everything is okay with you and the baby. Okay?" Rei looked at him with doubt and fear plastered on his face.
"I'll be there with you. I promise…" Kazuki intertwined his fingers with Rei’s, leaving a soft kiss on his temple. "You’re safe now. We're safe now, and together..." Kazuki watched as Rei slowly closed his eyes; at the very least, they felt safe.
The next day, they were sitting in the waiting room of the hospital. Rei's hands were sweaty; he had seen horrible things in his short 21 years of life; he had gone through horrible things and had to be neutral and calm in the worst situations an average human could imagine, but he couldn't help but feel anxious over a simple hospital visit. Maybe it was because he had never even set foot on one before.
Kazuki was reading a magazine about pregnancy, but he quickly pouted as he put the magazine aside. "There’s nothing about male pregnancies in that stupid magazine... Please remind me to buy some books when we go back home." Kazuki quickly realized how stiff Rei was. He took one of his cold and pale hands between his owns, leaving a sweet kiss on the back of it. Rei looked back at him, his anxiety calming down a little.
"Suwa Rei?" A woman called from the door of another room, Rei and Kazuki got up quickly. entering the doctor’s office.
"Suwa Rei?" The woman asked again to confirm, the black-haired boy nodded at the doctor’s question. The kind woman gave them a warm smile. "And you must be his husband." The doctor looked at Kazuki, who nodded, his chest rising proudly.
"Ok, let’s start, Rei; please take your shirt off and lay down on the bed." Rei obeyed the doctor’s instructions.
"I will put this gel on your tummy to make the ultrasound reading easier. It might feel a little bit cold." Rei nodded as the doctor started applying the gel to his round belly. Rei made a light grimace at the unexpected cold feeling on his tummy. His blonde partner held his hand, squeezing it lightly.
The doctor put the machine against Rei’s tummy as she watched the monitor. Kazuki was also watching the monitor, even though he didn’t understand a single thing he was watching. The doctor let out a huge smile.
"The baby is about six months in. The baby is small, but this is common in male pregnancies; nothing to worry about, but you should improve your eating habits, Rei."
"That’s what I tell him all the time!" Kazuki said, and the doctor let out a loud laugh.
"Please obey your husband, Rei." Rei looked at a wall, blushing.
"Let’s hear the baby’s heartbeat." A little sound like drums filled the room. "Those are the baby’s heartbeats, which are pretty strong; that’s a really good sign that the baby is growing up really healthy." Kazuki smiled widely. Rei paid attention to the little heartbeat as he felt a little flutter of happiness on his tummy, even if his face didn’t quite show that.
"Would you like to know the baby’s gender?" Kazuki looked up at Rei, waiting for him to give an answer. Rei just nodded lightly.
"It’s a girl," said the doctor, and Kazuki’s face lit up with joy. "A very healthy and strong baby girl." The doctor removed the machine from his stomach. The doctor gave Rei a paper towel so he could clean up the gel.
"Rei, the only recommendations I have for you is to feed yourself more properly, I will prescript some pills, and don’t worry they won’t hurt the baby in any way. And I will sign you to the hospital’s pregnant dad’s program; it will help you learn a lot of things about your pregnancy as a male. Don’t demand yourself too much, but try to stay active, and please start talking to the baby, this month is really important for the baby’s emotional development. That would be everything, congrats dads."
--
"Miri sounds cute..." whispered Rei, reading the book of names Kazuki had bought along with a pile of books about male pregnancy. Rei knew Kazuki would only read a few. Kazuki was reading "Male Pregnancy: Everything You Need to Know."
"Miri, what’s the meaning?" asked Kazuki without taking his eyes off the book.
"Beautiful," Rei explained.
Kazuki smiled, softly placing his ear on Rei’s tummy.
"Miri? Do you like that name?" Kazuki laughed when he felt the baby kick.
The future was uncertain for all of them, but they were tired of feeling scared. That little baby was possibly the only stable thing they had at the time, the only thing they could expect for their futures that wasn't destruction or death, one of the only beautiful and rare occurrences of the future smiling at them.So they both were sure they would do everything in their power for their little new family's wellbeing, even if it meant having to face their horrible past in order to learn to be parents.
"Then Miri will be. Grow up healthy, Miri~ Papas love you."