Chapter Text
Goodbye, a genuine way of seeing off someone who you may run into again.
Saying goodbye leaves a chance we may never see them again, whether it be a loved one or a stranger.
We cannot expect things, we cannot expect good things to always happen.
I dream of being someone different.
Everyday.
I hate roaming the world knowing I cannot be someone normal.
I don’t remember much of who I was before I signed that contract, maybe I would not have this.
I had a normal life before, who was I?
Who were my parents?
Did I have someone special to me?
It is all blurry.
Fuzzy images in my head, not knowing things that came before.
Like a chain wrapped around my head, unable to be broken.
Everything is like a chain, dragging me down to the earth.
God I wish I was fucking dead.
I hate this. I fucking hate this.
Years of being on this rock, watching people around me age and die.
I don’t want to accept this life that I have. I want things that are out of my grasp.
Life is unfair.
Everyday I watch as they drift their fingers through each other’s.
What does it feel like?
How does it feel if someone else were to come in contact with me?
Will my heart skip a beat?
Will I finally experience what everybody else has longed for?
I watch the lights shine and glisten in their eyes.
Fuck.
Fuck.
Dreaming will get me nothing.
I cannot expect life to change.
Stick to the routine.
Crimson.
Warm.
Waking up and immediately feeling like shit, perfect start to my day.
The pillow submerged in my arms, grasping closely against my chest.
Tank top loosely fit around my body, gently stroking my skin.
The pure white feathers embracing me.
The morning taste filling my mouth.
This is life.