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2015-07-08
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I Wanna Ruin Our Friendship

Summary:

This is bad, this is so, so, unbelievably bad. God, he was absolutely screwed, because this shirt smells like the boy and since when did he recognize him simply by his smell?It isn't something someone could simply commit to memory over night, no, this was built over the last two years of sleep over's, practices, and close proximity. But shit, this was not how he wanted this to go.

He didn't want to fall in love with Shouyou, yet the shirt was screaming at him and jesus christ-

Notes:

I blame studio killers and their song "Jenny" for this. I didn't mean for this to happen I swear but then it did and I don't even know. I live for my babes to struggle with their feelings. Also, this was only partially edited, so expect some mistakes. Please enjoy almost 8,000 words of what resembles a fic.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

”I wanna ruin our friendship…"

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                This is bad, this is so, so, unbelievably bad. Kageyama realizes this as he stares at the shirt clutched in his hands, heart racing unreasonably fast. God, he was absolutely screwed, because this shirt smells like the boy and since when did he recognize him simply by his smell? It isn't something someone could simply commit to memory over night, no, this was built over the last two years of sleep over's, practices, and close proximity. But shit, this was not how he wanted this to go.

                He didn't want to fall in love with Shouyou, yet the shirt was screaming at him and jesus christ-

                                                                                         


 

                Kageyama will forever blame Hinata for the fight that took place at the end of their first year together, because it actually was entirely his fault. It had started when they were cleaning up after practice, trying to hurry it along so they could get to Kageyamas' house to play a new game he had gotten. This may have resulted in their cleaning being more than a little half assed, but hopefully no one would notice it on Monday. He was slightly concerned though, because Hinata had been frowning more than he was smiling the whole day, and he'd avoided playing with Kageyama at practice. Hinata said he still wanted to come over though, so, after locking the door to the club room they started making their way down to Kageyamas' house.

                He still isn't all that sure what caused Hinata to snap at him, the boy had been off all day long, but snap he did.

                "Oi, Bakayeyama, your face is uglier than usual."

                Kageyama stopped in his tracks, "The hell, Hinata? What was that for?"

                "What do you mean; I always say that your face is shit." Hinata scoffs at him and continues walking.

                "Well, yeah, but not unless I say something to you first. Wait, Oi, Hinata stop walking!" He scowls as the boy stops, turning around to face him. "What going on with you?"

                Hinata presses his lips together, "Nothing."

                "Bullshit, you've been weird all day." Kageyama snaps, hands tightening against the strap of his bag.

                "No I have-."

                "Yes you have!"

                Hinatas' face goes a little red at the interruption, but he doubts it's from embarrassment. "Like hell! You have no proof!"

                Kageyama can feel his eyeball twitch, and he takes a steadying breath, trying to making sure he won't yell before he speaks again. "Hinata, you've been frowning all day, you didn't say a word at lunch, and you wouldn't let me toss to you. Something is wrong."

                Hinata blinks at this, looking down to avoid eye contact. "I didn't think you noticed that…"

                "Of course I did dumbass, we're constantly around each other. Don't you think I would notice when   something's wrong?" Kageyama frowns at the revelation that Hinata doesn't think he's paying attention to his habits. He's an asshole every now and again sure, but Hinata didn't actually think he hated him did he?

                The boy in question shuffles in place for a second, keeping his head down as he blurts out, "I came out to my family!"

                Kageyama blinks at this, "O... kay… why is this a big deal?"

                "Wait, you're not disgusted?" Hinata tilts his head at him, brown eyes questioning.

                He scuffs and shoves his hands into his pockets, trying to keep his face indifferent.  "I thought you of all people knew that I wasn't looking at girls half as much as I probably should."

                "Oh… I just- I didn't want to assume anything." Hinata explains.

                "Its fine," Kageyama takes a breath. This really wasn't where he'd expected this conversation to go, but he still had an unanswered question. "So, why is it a big deal that you came out to your family?"

                Hinata flinches, "It wasn’t, at least to my parents and sister. My grandparents on the other hand…"

                The silence stretches between them for a few minutes, the implications of Hinatas' words sinking in with Kageyama. His grandparents weren't happy with his sexuality, to what degree he wasn't sure but it was enough to rattle Hinata. Sighing he resumed walking, stopping next to Hinata to place a hand in his hair in tug. He's met with a yell and smaller hands pulling at his arm, "Forget about them, okay? If they can't accept you the way you are, then they can go to hell."

                Hinata stares up at him with something he can't exactly place, and he feels something squirm in him. He coughs, releasing his hair with a shout of "Race you to my house dumbass!" as he sprinted down the street. A few moments later a call of "Bakeyama, get back here!" sounds from behind him, and he allows himself to feel relieved.

                                                                                                  


 

                This shirt is mocking him he swears, walking out the front door he's got his hand inside the bag, rubbing the soft fabric. It really shouldn't be this fucking soothing but it is, and he can't bring himself to stop doing it. Or at least he can't until he spots Shouyou on his bike waiting for him a little ways up the street, then he pulls his hand out of his bad sharply, making sure to zip it up tightly. Shouyou smiles at him and starts peddling again once Kageyama is at his side.

                "Morning!" Hinata has always been cheery in the morning, but today for some reason it makes him nervous.

                "Mornin'," Kageyama mumbles, touching his bag lightly.

                Hinata stops peddling and touches his feet to the ground, giving Kageyama a concerned look. "You okay?"

                His heart stops for a moment, and this is probably the time to give him back his shirt, but- "I'm fine dumbass.  If you stop again we'll be late for school again."

                                                                                                       


 

                In the summer between first and second year they grow even closer if possible, they spend nearly every day together, and on the days they’re apart they text. Kageyama hates to say it, but Hinata has made himself a staple in Kageyamas' life. At this point Kageyama can officially say that Hinata knows more about him than anyone else, his mother included. It wasn't Kageyamas' doing, it had all but been forced on him to share his personal life with Hinata. He blames the universe and phone signals.

                Because at nine o'clock on a Thursday night, his phone lights up while Hinata and him are in the middle of a debate. This time they argue about who's better at cooking, because while they both agree they're horrible over all, one of them still has to be better than the other. Hinata claims that he wins because Kageyama once set a box of cereal on fire when he set it on a hot stovetop, and Kageyama is saying he wins because Hinata actually tried to microwave an egg once. He's in the middle of winning the argument, so he ignores his phone the first time is lights up, but the seventh time he's had enough.

                "Ugh, hold on- I am not giving up dumbass my phone just keeps ringing, don't give me that look of triumph." Kageyama glares at Hinata as he leans over from his spot on the floor to his nightstand. Hinata sticks his tongue out at him as he blindly pats around the top of his nightstand for a minute before getting a hold of his phone. "Who in the hell is-."

                The number flashing on the front of his phone isn't marked with a name, but he's seen it before and he knows exactly who it is. Something in him drops far into the pit of his stomach, and he can feel his breath speeding up. The ringing on his phone has stopped at this point but the noise carries on in his ears, and soon his phone is lighting up for the eighth time with that same number. The phone is shaking in his hand despite the vice like grip he has on it, and his vision is blurring rapidly and shit shit shit-

                "Kageyama!" A voice breaks through his inner turmoil, and he can feel hands on his shoulders. "Kageyama, Oi, what's going on? Are you okay? Oi, say something!"

                Kageyama swallows hard and opens his mouth, lips not making a sound for a minute before he can speak. "D- it's, I mean…my, my d-dad. My dad, he's, he-."

                "Kageyama breathe, just breath." The hands on his shoulders grip a little tighter, trying to anchor him back into reality.

                He tries to breathe in and he notes that he sounds somewhat like a dying leaf blower. His chest is caving in so sharply is stings, and Kageyama is starting to feel light headed. One of the hands grabs his free one and its places against something firm.

                "Follow my breathing, okay? Just breathe with me." The object under Kageyamas' hand expands slowly, pauses, and then sinks back down just as slow.

                His breathing is shallow and sharp, and sometimes it stops all together, but he concentrates all his energy on the moment of the chest beneath his hand. Soon enough he's got his breathing mostly under control, every now and again he stutters in his breath but he gets it back.  The phone still rings in his hand.

                "Kageyama, do you want to talk to him?"

                The question is seemingly bigger and more complicated than Hinata is making it sound, and he doesn't know how to answer. Does he want to talk to this man, he's not sure, he could spend the rest of his life completing this. Then Hinata is calling him by his first name, and the shock of it is enough for him to find his answer. No, he doesn't want to speak to this man. Hinata nods in understanding and slowly uncurls Kageyamas' fingers from around the active phone, treating him as if he was made of glass. Hinata takes the phone and walks across the room with it, shoving it into a door in Kageyama dresser and slamming it shut. The ringing in both his ears and the room stops, and it feels as though a weight has been lifted off his chest.

                Hinata walks back over to him, sitting down in front of him. Kageyama lowers his head and stares at his hands, "I don't…I can't talk about-."

                "I know, I know." Hinatas' hands find their way to his face hesitantly, slowly, as if to give him time to move. Kageyama doesn't, and Hinata rubs his thumbs along his cheek bones. "We don't have to talk about it Tobio, not if you don't want to. Do you want to watch a movie or something?"

                He shakes his head, "I want to go to bed."

                "Alright that's fine, I'll go grab the spare futon and we can go the bed." Hinata drops his hands from his face, and gets on his feet to grab his futon. Kageyama can feel himself start to panic, so he reaches up to grab Hinatas' wrist to stop him.

                "No," Kageyamas' voice is cracks and he swallows. "You don't need to pull out the futon, its fine."

                There's an underlying plea of "please don't let me sleep alone" and because this is Hinata, and because he knows him disturbingly well after a little over a year, Hinata nods his head. Kageyama lets go of his wrist so that Hinata can turn off the lights, and he all but crawls into bed. He scouts in only enough to give Hinata room to lie down, bringing the covers up over his head and squeezing his eyes shut. A warm body slips into bed besides him, crawling underneath the covers and shuffling for a second before settling. He stays rigid, body tight and tense on the mattress. The silence is far too loud to him and he wants something, anything other than the harshness of his breath to be heard.

                He feels Hinata move around more than he hears it, and then he's really feeling it because there's a hand on his back. It doesn't move, it stays warm and solid on his back. "I'm sorry Tobio, I-." Hinata pauses, takes a breath. "I'm so sorry."

                Kageyama chokes on his own sobs as they bubble out of his throat, shoving his face into his pillow in hopes of muffling it. This barely does anything for the sound though; it just suffocates him even more. The hand on his back moves, replaced by an arm that goes around his waist. Legs slip between and around his own, and a face presses itself between his shoulder blades. To his own horror Kageyama sobs become more violent than before. He reaches down and grabs the hand resting on his stomach, intertwining his fingers with the boy that lies with him.

                Kageyama squeezes his hand and Hinata squeezes back twice as hard.

                                                                                                


 

                The shirt bothers him all throughout class, making it so that the teacher has to call on him three times before he responds. The class snickers and he lets his head fall onto his desk with a "thud" when the teacher turns back around. He slams his head on the desk a few more times for good measure, mumbling to himself that it was just a fucking shirt and he needed to find a way to calm down. Kageyama touches the phone in his pocket and seriously considers calling Suga for help, or Daichi, or at this point maybe even Oikawa because yes he is that desperate. But then again, he wasn't desperate at all. Nope, not one bit. Because he was not in love with Shouyou and that was the end of it. As long as he ignored it by all rights it should go away, yes, sound logic.

                This whole "ignoring it" plan goes swimmingly until lunch, when Shouyou and he both meet up under a tree by the back of the gym. They do it every day, eat lunch, talk, and toss the volleyball back and forth until lunch ends. Today though, Kageyama is finding himself having problems. Like, for example, when Shouyou asks for a bite of the meat bun he has in his lunch. He holds it out for him to grab, and instead is met when Shouyous' mouth taking a bite out of the bun while it was still in his hand.        To make matters worse he had placed a hand on Kageyamas' thigh to steady himself, his fingers curling into his pants ever-so-slightly. He swallows thickly, watching Shouyou slack jawed as he leaned back against the tree.

                Shouyou hums as he swallows, turning to look at Kageyama and licking his lips as he says, "That was a lot of filling, I almost couldn't swallow it all!"

                Kageyama almost passes out.

                                                                                                  


 

                Second year - he's surprised to find - is almost the same as his first year. The only differences being that while he and Hinata fought, it wasn't with the intention of hurting the other anymore, and they were actually best friends. At least, Hinata was his best friends, he's not sure if he's Hinatas'. Kenma may take over that role in Hinatas' life. The third years were gone (but even that didn't feel real to him, seeing as how Suga texted him regularly to check up on him, and they got updates on Asahi through Nishinoya). Not to mention that Karasuno was now a feared, and recognized talent to other high schools. He had friends now and team mates who actually liked him…

                Okay so maybe his second year was drastically different from his first year.

                He's spending the night at Hinatas' this time around, and while this isn't out of the ordinary they do spend more time at his house then Hinatas'. This would revolve around the fact that Hinata lived over the god forsaken mountains. If they wanted to spend the night at his house, they both had to walk. Also, Hinata came over to his house after school almost every day, since they had a habit of losing track of time - and Kageyamas' mother was strangely protective of Hinata - Hinata stayed over when it got too late for him to ride through the mountains. So while it wasn't as if he'd never been at Hinatas' house, it was still out of the norm for them.

                "So, I was thinking that we should watch that new scary movie I bought!" Hinata all but flings himself onto his bed, tossing his bag onto a pile of crap on his floor.

                Kageyama closes Hinatas' bedroom door behind him and hangs his bag off of Hinatas' desk chair. "We have homework, dumbass."

                Hinata groans, rolling around his bed dramatically. "Come onnnnn, we have all weekend to do our homework. Can't we watch the movie first?"

                "If I let you watch this movie, there is not chance in hell we'll be getting any homework done tonight." Kageyama crosses his arms across his chest, narrowing his eyes at the boy.

                Hinata snorts and pulls himself upright on his bed, "Nu-uh."

                "Yeah-hu." Kageyama rolls his eyes, "One movie is gonna turn into six, then you're going to be tired and it'll be unreasonably late."

                "I really want to watch it though, plus since mom and dad took Natsu over with them to grandma's this may be the only chance I get to watch it for a long time! You know my mom doesn't like me playing this stuff while my sisters in the house in case she walks in," Hinata is whining like a child and flopping his arms, making Kageyama conceal a smirk.

                He scowls instead of letting the smirk slip, "Hinata, this homework is going to take-."

                "Please Tobio?" Hinata interrupts him, a pout pulling at his lips.

                This makes Kageyama choke on air and his speech stops for the moment. Hinata had taken to calling him by his first name after that night during the summer, but he was so embarrassed by it he hardly ever said Kageyamas' name at all. When he has brought up that if Hinata would just continue calling him by his last name he wouldn't be embarrassed, Hinata and he had gotten into an hour long argument. Hinata said he call him that, he had told Kageyama that "something's changed okay! You're not Kageyama anymore, you're Tobio. Alright, it's just-, I don't know." Hinata had refused to give any explanation as to what in the hell that even meant, so Kageyama had lost the argument.

                Since it was so rare for Hinata to use his name now though, it made Kageyama short circuit every time he did. It was Hinatas' way of winning the situation, or letting Kageyama know that he really needed him to be serious and listen. Though he seriously doubted that it was the latter in this situation. Kageyama huffed and uncrossed his arms, "Fine, fine! One movie though, just one, you go it?"

                Hinata leaped off the bed, grabbing his laptop off his nightstand and the movie out of said nightstands drawer. "Whoop! Movie time it is then!" Hinata pauses, turning to look at him, "Oh, we should make snacks hu?"

                Kageyama nods and turns to walk out of the room and down into the kitchen, Hinata following close behind him. They made their way downstairs, the house oddly quiet without Hinatas' sister following them around. She had taken a strange liking to Kageyama, trailing behind him, asking him to color with her, and even sitting on his lap during movies. The affection had startled Kageyama at first, but with time - just like he had her brother - he got used to Natsu constantly being affectionate with him. Without her in the house it was weird, but it was refreshing to get some space.

                Hinata skipped into the kitchen, already making his way to climb up on the counter much to his friends' disapproval.

                "Oi! Dumbass, get down! I've told you it's dangerous to go up their like that!" Kageyama quickly steps into the kitchen, standing behind Hinata as he opened the very top cupboard.

                "Oh shut up, it's fine. I've done this tons of times before. Do you want chips?" Hinata looks behind and down at Kageyama, keeping his hold on the cupboard doors as he leaned back.

                Kageyamas' hand twitch at his sides, "Don't lean back! Okay, seriously, stop Hinata. You're going to hurt yourself."

                Hinata chooses to ignore him and pushes aside some stuff in the cupboard. "I'm feeling like popcorn, but I also really want chips. Probably won't hurt to have both right?"

                "Hinata, I swear to god," Kageyama tenses with Hinata slides his sock covered feet along the smooth counter, completely careless.

                "Yeah, I'm having both. Oh! There are some candies in the other cabinet I just remembered." Hinata pulls out the chips and pop corn, dropping them on the counter below.

                Hinata closes the doors to the cupboard and starts to walk across the counter, humming to himself a little bit. Kageyama stays close to him as he walks, and when he looks down at Hinatas' feet he sees a puddle of water. He isn't too sure where it came from, but Hinatas' foot it about to-.

                Hinata lets out a shout as his foot slips underneath him, the wetness in his sock making him lose all traction. His body starts falling to the side and Kageyama feels something drop in his stomach, his mouth moves and he calls out Hinatas' first name in horror. Kageyama is moving instantly, reaching out to catch Hinata. The boys' smaller body collides with his own and he wraps his arms around him. He tucks Hinatas' head to his chest and curls his body around the spikers as much as he can. He lands flat on his back, the air knocking out of him in a burst. He can barely notice it though, because the second the fall is over Kageyama is looking over Hinata who groans.

                "God, shit, shit, shit. Shou, are you okay? Fuck, Shouyou are you okay!?" Kageyama is forced to loosen his grip on him as Hinata raises himself up slightly. He's looking at Kageyama as if he's something absolutely amazing, but this is hardly realized by Kageyama.

                He brings one of his arms off of Hinatas' waist and grabs the side of his face somewhat urgently, yet gently. Due to the fact that Hinatas' stomach currently rests against his own, he can feel it when Hinata sucks in a breath; he can feel Hinatas' fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt. He takes this as a sign that the boy is injured. "Where does it hurt? Is your head okay; did you hurt your arm; can you breath alright?"

                Kageyama moves his hand from Hinatas' cheek up into his hair, all but running his fingers through the orange locks looking for a bump or blood. "I can't feel anything, shit; I never listened to Daichi when he said what the signs of a concussion were. What's your uniform number, what's my uniform number, what day is it? Shouyou what's my name?"

                Shouyou seems to regain his senses and frowns at Kageyama. "Mine is ten, yours is nine. Today is Friday, and your name is Tobio. Stop asking if I'm okay, I'm fine since you caught me. Are okay? You landed really hard and I'm heavy."

                Now Shouyou is the one putting a hand on Kageyamas' face, warm eyes looking at his own in search of hurt or discomfort. Kageyama frowns, "You aren't heavy, dumbass. I'm fine, you're the one who fell of the counter, and you're the one who could be hurt."

                "I'm fine Tobio, really. I'm just worried about your back; I think I heard something crack." Shouyou grimaces and looks down at his chest, removing his hand from Kageyamas' face.

                "I'm fi-." Shouyou starts to get off of him and his back screams out at the movement. Quickly he wraps his arms back around Shouyous' waist to still him. "God, fuck, oh god. Don't move, holy shit don't move."

                Shou stills instantly, looking at Kageyama with what he thinks is pity. "Sorry, sorry! Is it that bad? Do you think you should go to the hospital?"

                "No, no Shouyou its fine, I think I just need a second." Kageyama talks through gritted teeth, eyes squeezed shut.

                "You called me Shouyou. You've been calling me Shouyou.”

                Kageyama snaps his eyes open and looks at Shouyou, "Shut up dumbass. I'll go back to calling you H-Hin, Hina-." He keeps tripping over it, the word stuck on his tongue. He looks at Shouyou and see's him falling all over again. He feels the terror and the concern, he can feel himself dropping to the ground, not once concerned with himself but making sure that Shouyou doesn't dare get hurt.
"Something's changed okay! You're not Kageyama anymore, you're Tobio. Alright, it's just-, I don't know."

                Oh. That's what he'd meant. Somewhere in the space between the idiot standing on the counter, and the landing on the floor, Hinata had turned into Shouyou. Kageyama thinks he understands it on some level, because he'd never been that scared for Hinata before, never had he been so concerned. The name change wasn't for the hell of it, it was because Hinata had been scared for him, and that had changed them from friends into something deeper and more intimate. Fuck, that wasn't expected.

                "Just shut up dumbass, I'll call you Shouyou if I want to." He ignores the looks on Shouyous' face that means he knows, that he understands.

                (Later, after they've managed to get up, make the snacks and start the movie, they bicker like normal and argue whether or not this is actually scary. He lies on the floor on his stomach because it offers some relief for his back, and soon Shouyou is kneeling next to him, small hands rubbing along his spine. He doesn't protest to it because honestly it feels really good and he knows Shou won't listen to him anyway. Shouyou kneads and rubs his back, working out the kinks up and down his spine. He's mostly a puddle at his partners mercy, not even caring when Shouyous' hands slip under his shirt slightly. The lack of resistance between skin on skin allows Shou to work the flesh a little better.  So he lets these moments slide.

                He's half asleep when Shouyou whispers out a "thank you for catching me" next to his ear.

                He doesn't even think about it when he responds "I'll always catch you, no matter what.")

                                                                                                   


 

                Practice rolls around and it's even worse, because he's never noticed exactly how short Shouyous' shorts are, or how his shirt rides up whenever he stretches, exposing smooth skin. It makes Kageyamas' mouth go dry and he has to refill his water bottle a total of eight times in the first 45 minutes of practice. Shouyou has to break up a fight between some of the first years with Yamaguchis' help, and it reminds him of when Daichi used to yell at him and Shouyou for exactly that. The thought of how he used to be makes him want to cringe, and he glares at his water bottle as if it's responsible for the past.

                "You okay?"

                Kageyama jumps and looks up to see Shouyou looking back at him. Apparently now the bastard Tsukishima was helping Yamaguchi contain the first year, most of them apologized quickly at the sight of his glaring. Kageyama snorts, Tsukishima was all bark and no bite, at least that was the case when Yamaguchi was there to lecture him.  

                "Earth to Tobio? Oi!" Shou snaps his fingers at him, looking at Kageyama as if he's grown a second head.

                He feels his mouth run dry as he looks back to Shouyou. God, he was killing him. The decoy was still breathing a little heavy from practice, hands on his hips. Kageyama is about to say he's fine, then a bead of sweat rolls down from Shouyous' jaw line, down his neck, slipping over his collar bone before disappearing under his shirt and jesus fucking christ he is so not okay.

                "Tobi-!"

                "I need to talk to you after practice!" Kageyama blurts, loud enough to make Shouyou flinch, but quiet enough luckily that no one looks their way.

                He's given a confused look, concern slipping in more than he'd like. "O..kay?"

                Kageyama nods curtly, and promptly walks past Shouyou as fast as possible towards the second years. That was so not what he wanted to say in the slightest, not at all. He didn't need to talk to Shou; he had nothing he wanted to confess to him. He wasn't ready, he wasn't ready.

                So why in the fuck did he say that?

                                                                                                  


 

                It's cold as absolute balls, and he's outside because Shouyou is an idiot. An absolute idiot.

                Shouyous' mother had called him over a half hour ago, tone panicked and scared, asking him if Shouyou was at his house. Kageyama had told her no, and asked what was wrong. Apparently he hadn't come home yet even though practice had ended two hours ago, and a storm was coming soon. Kageyama told Hinata-san that he would keep a look out and hung up the phone. Well when he said "keep a look out" he really meant "go look for Shouyou right as the blizzard starts". He had put on the first coat and scarf he could find, grabbing an extra coat for Shouyou, and pulling on his boots. His mother was gone (some sort of work retreat for the next week, winter break started after this weekend anyway) so he didn't have to worry about her, Kageyama simply left and locked the door behind him.

                He'd been looking for Shouyou for about 25 minutes now, walking down all of the usual streets and stopping by the convince store. He'd even walked back to the school, making sure the idiot hadn't' gone back for extra training or something. Honestly, Kageyama was starting to freak out a little. School had ended over two and a half hours ago, it was currently below zero, and Shou had left his winter jacket in his locker. All he had on when they left was sweater, and that wouldn't help him for shit right now. The only place left to check was his path through the mountains on his way home. Kageyama sighed and turned around to start the painful walk, when he remembered-

                The park. That was the only place he hadn't checked in the area.

                He runs down the streets, his breath coming out as little clouds in the air. He almost slips and falls at least ten times going around the corners, his cheeks are going numb and the wind he creates bites at his ears; he doesn't stop though. He full out sprints the last block, coming to a sloppy stop at the front of the park. He can't see anything on the structure, but that doesn't necessarily mean much. He catches a breath for a moment before he starts walking again, and the second he does his foot catches on something. He manages to catch himself, cursing quietly under his breath. He glares at the snow covered object, the blue paint and wheels just barely visible. Wait, blue paint, tires.

                He drops to his knees, pushing off the snow to revel a bike. Well used, on the smaller side, with a long scratch from when Kageyama hadn't put the brake on it and it rammed it into the side of the school. This was Shouyous' bike, meaning-

                Kageyama un-hunches himself from over the bike, eyes wide as he calls out, "Shouyou!"

                His voice echo's for a moment, and he's about to scream when he hears a "Tobio!"

                He gets to his feet quickly, running over to the play structure. He skids around the snow as he climbs around the thing, the plastic is far too icy, and he slips and falls onto his ass. He groans, but yells again. "Shouyou!"

                "Tobio! I'm in the slide!"

                He rolls over, pushing himself onto his feet and making his way across the structure. Once he reaches the slide he jumps down, landing on his feet squarely. He goes around, feeling his chest loosen and tighten all at once. Shouyou sits as far inside the tube slide as he can get, knees to his chest and arms wrapped around himself. He's shivering violently and his skin looks honest-to-god blue.

                Despite all this, he smiles as radiant as sunshine, "H-hey, T-toooob-bio, yo-you found meeeee."

                "God dammit Shou," Kageyama moves closer and starts pulling on his arm, "Why are you even-?"

                Shouyou cries out and Kageyama stills, letting go of the boy quickly. "What!? What's wrong?"

                "I fell offffff my bi-bike, I hit a pat-ch-ch of ice I-I think. My armmmm got ice bu-rn-rned or soooomethin', and I c-can't walk on my ankle." Shouyou mumbles it all out, tripping over his words as he shivers.

                Kageyama frowns as he walks a bit closer, he bends down so that he's level with Shouyou inside the slide. "Which ankle?"

                "L-left."

                Kageyama reaches out slowly, so that Shouyou can stop him if he wants. He doesn't protest so Kageyama continues, touching the ankle gently. He rubs it through the pants fabric, "Can you move it at all?"

                Shou nods, "Yeah. I-I don't, thi-nk it'sssss broken."

                Kageyama nods in agreement, "You probably just sprained it," He frowns, looking up at Shouyou. "Why didn't you call me?"

                He reaches into his back pocket, pulling out his phone and waving it around. "I-it died."

                Kageyama sighs, "Okay well you can't stay in there. Here, put your arm around my neck, I'll help pull you out."

                Shou complies, reaching out with a shaking hand and wrapping it around his neck. The skin brushes past his scarf and touches his neck, Kageyama almost hisses at the feeling. He seriously needed to get Shouyou warm; he had a dangerously low body heat at the moment. Shouyou wobbles as he gets back on his feet, not letting his left foot touch the ground. Kageyama leans him up against the slide and Hinata grips onto it with his good arm. He unties the extra jacket from around his waist, shaking off any snow that's fallen on it and holding it up.

                Shouyou blinks at him, "Youuuu br-brought me  a jack-ket?"

                "Oh course I did, I knew you didn't have yours with you. Come on hold up your arms," Kageyama rolls his eyes and moves the jacket around as a sign of inpatients.

                Shouyou does as he told, his arms trembling as he hold them out. Kageyama walks over, helping the jacket onto him carefully but quickly. He wraps it snug around Shouyous' frame, standing in front of him and zipping it up all the way to his neck. It's a little big on him (seeing as how it is Kageyamas' jacket) but he doesn't think the decoy minds. He burrows in on its warmth, curling in on himself as much as possible. Kageyama feels his stomach drop at the way Shou shivers through his jacket, cheeks looking painfully red. He pulls off his own scarf, wrapping it around Shouyou snuggly.  He unzips his own jacket, shuddering as the air hits his arms. He really should've put on a long sleeved shirt before leaving his house.

                "W-what are you-?"

                "You're freezing Shouyou, I'll be fine, and we're not far from my house." He doesn't give him the chances to argue, pulling his arms through the sleeves and zipping up this jacket as well. He turns around and squats down, "Come on, we need to get you back home."

                "My h-house is ov-ver the moooountains."

                "My home, dumbass. You can't walk, so climb on." Kageyama shakes his head, sighing heavily.

                There's a pause, but after a second he feels Shouyou wrap his arms around his neck. Kageyama puts his hands underneath his thighs and stands up, giving a little hop so Shou rests higher on his back. He starts his walk around the structure, cursing as the wind picks up.

                "Wh-what about my bi-ke?" Shouyou asks, face pressed against the nape of his neck.

                Kageyama shivers, "I'll drop you off at my house, while you take a scolding hot bath, I'll come back and grab it."

                "You d-don’t have tooo do that," Shouyou mumbles.

                Kageyama looks over his shoulder best he can at Shouyou, "It's not a discussion Shou. You're freezing, you need to get warm."

                The rest of their walk is silent, and while Shouyou still shivers against his back it's not nearly as violent as before. Kageyama walks as fast as he can, avoid the worst parts of the road and keeping a firm grip on his partner. When they reach his front door he has Shouyou fish the keys out of his jacket pocket and unlocks the door for him. He opens it with his foot and all but slams it shut with his foot; he carries Shouyou all the way into the living room, and almost starts to deposit him on the couch before something occurs to him.  

                "Shouyou, can you make it up the stairs or do you need me to carry you up?"

                A pause, "I can w-."

                "Don't lie to me Shouyou." Kageyama cuts him off before he gets any further, frowning at him.

                Shouyou sighs, "Sorry. No I can't, just drop me off in your room. I'll be fine from there."

                Kageyama nods, makes the walk upstairs and deposits Shou on his bed. He demands he takes the hot bath, and after arguing about it for seven minutes he finally gets Shouyou to agree. He tells him it'll probably take him about 15 or 20 minutes to get his bike and come back, and they almost argue again about whether or not he should even get it. Kageyama shuts him up with a well timed glare, and Shouyou makes him promise to be careful. He promises him he will, and he walks out the door.

                Half an hour later he's back, covered in snow and really really hating Mother Nature. The storm finally started halfway there, and with the snow making it nearly impossible to see it took him an extra ten minutes to get back. Shou is sitting on his couch when he gets back, dressed in his black sweat pants and a thick sweater. He nags at Kageyama about going out in the storm, and Kageyama in return ignores him and heads upstairs to change. He pulls on another pair of sweat pants and a long sleeve shirt; he picks up his phone and makes a quick call to Shouyous' mom to let him know he's okay. Confirming that Shouyou will be staying there until the snow clears up and hanging up, he grabs three blankets and heads back downstairs. He wraps Shouyou under the blankets and turns on the T.V., going to some cooking show his mother left on.

                Shouyou unwraps the blankets on the side closest to Kageyama, scoots over with all of them and tosses them over Kageyama. They argue for the third time that night, because Shouyou really needs the blankets because he's still cold, and Shou claims that Kageyama needs to take better care of himself. This effectively shuts him up, so he allows Shou to wrap him in the blankets and melts into the couch. Shouyou curls into his side and makes comments about the cooking show, and Kageyama lets him because Shouyou needs whatever body heat he has.

                (He wakes up around midnight, both of them having fallen asleep during the program. He picks up Hinata and carries him back up to his room, setting him on his bed and crawling under the covers with him.  The next morning he makes sure to take care of all of Shouyous' injuries, and carries him back downstairs. They spend the next three days sitting under piles of blankets and drinking hot chocolate. )

                                                                                                     


 

                They're walking home currently, and Kageyama thinks he might actually throw up. Because he can feel Shouyou staring at him, probably because he has not in fact forgot that Kageyama had said he wanted to talk to him. He was hoping it would slip the boys mind, but apparently it hadn't and now he was completely fucked.

                "Okay, that's it."

                He winces as Shouyous' bike comes to a stop, tires screeching against the pavement. Shouyou climbs off his bike and all but throws it to the side, marching in front of Kageyama. Shouyou is actually scowling at him, and that is not a good sign.

                "What in the actual fuck is going on with you!? You've been weird all day, and at practice you said you wanted to talk, and now you won't even look me in the eye!" Shou stands up on his toes, trying his hardest to get in Kageyamas' face.

                Kageyama swallows hard, "It's nothing alright. Let's just keep walking."

                He pushes past Shouyou, speed walking down the street. He's breathing way too hard for the pace he's going, and he can feel a ringing making its way into his ears. He didn't have a choice, he was going to have to move to America and start a new life. He could learn English, maybe, sort of.

                "Tobio."

                It's not a call of anger, but a broken plea. Kageyama halts, spinning around on his heals because he knows that voice, it's the once Shouyou uses right before he's about to cry. And shit, he can see it from here that Shouyous' eyes are brimming with tears, his lip wobbling and hands clenched at his side.

                "I thought we agreed we wouldn't lie to each other, I thought you trusted me….Was I wrong?" Shouyou lets out a shuddering breath, biting down hard on his lower lip.

                Kageyama feels the blood drain out of his face, "What? No, Shouyou, no-.”

                "I don't understand, I want to understand what I've done wrong. I need to know why you don't trust me anymore," Shouyou barely holds in the sob that tries to push past his lips, and the first few tears roll down his cheeks.

                Kageyama runs the short distance he walked back to Shouyou, dropping his bag at his feet and reaching up the grab the sides of Shouyous' face. He wipes the tears from under his eyes, shaking his head frantically. "No, no, no, no. Shouyou stop crying please, stop, I'm so sorry. I still trust you, I trust you more than anyone, please stop crying."

                Shouyou hiccups, one hand grabbing loosely onto his wrist and the other curling into his shirt. "Then why won't you tell me what's wrong?"

                Kageyama sighs, pressing his lips together thinly. He looks down at the bag at his feet and almost kicks it, but instead, he lets go of Shous' face and bends down. Shouyou lets go of his wrist and his shirt as he unzips the bag, eyes following his hands as he pulls out his shirt and presents it to him. Shouyou grabs his shirt slowly, rubbing his fingers along the fabric.

                He frowns, "You…you didn't like that I left my shirt at your place? I do that all the time though."

                Kageyama groans, he runs his fingers through and pulls on it. "No, that's not- look okay, so the shirt. Fuck me, the shirt made me realize…"

                "…realize?" Shouyou leans in a little.

                "Fucking hell, I can't-."

                "Tobio!"

                "I'm in love with you asshole!" Kageyama all but growls it, putting his hands over his face and dragging them down. "It's all your fault for the record! I didn't mean for this to happen, but this morning I was getting dressed and I saw your shirt and I knew it was yours because it smelled like you. Like seriously, who in the fuck knows someone by smell?!"

                "I do. I know you by your smell." Shouyou doesn't even blink when he says it, face completely serious.

                Kageyama stops, hands dropping to his sides. "You…wait what?"

                "I know you by smell alone. I also know that you like the smell of flowers, even though you'd never admit it. I know you draw when you're bored, and that you're actually really good at it. I know you prefer vanilla over chocolate, but only with ice cream." Shouyou smiles at him softly, and Kageyama forgets how to breathe.

                "I know that your actions speak way louder than your words, and that you hate it when people call you "king" not because the nickname is annoying, but because it actually hurts you." Shouyou takes a step closer to him, "I know that you care a lot more than people assume, because you've come running for me during a blizzard, and because you've caught me despite what it meant for you."

                Shouyou drops his shirt on the ground, reaches up and grips onto his collar, standing on his tip toes. His voice drops down to a whisper, "And I know that you're going to let me kiss you, right here, right now."

                "Shit."

                Shouyou leans up the same time he bends down, and their lips crash together almost violently, but god he can't find the energy to care. Shouyous' lips are soft against his own and it makes him forget anything and everything but the boy he's kissing. He wraps his arms around Shous' waist and presses him tight against him, pulling his lower lip into his mouth and sucking. Shouyou moans, moans, against his mouth and grips Kageyamas' collar tighter, tilting his head more. Kageyama pulls away for a split second, hearing both him and Shouyou gasp for air before he reconnects their lips. This time their mouths are opening more, mouths moving together somewhat desperately. For a second he wonders how long Shouyou has wanted this too, then there's a hand in his hair and a tongue in his mouth and holy fucking shit-

                "Tobio, where's your mom?" Shouyou pulls away from his mouth, letting himself drop back onto his feet and placing his lips against Kageyamas' neck.

                Kageyamas' fingers dig into Shouyous' sides, "Uh, oh shit, uhm, out. She's- she's at a work thing."

                Shouyou sucks on the pulse in his neck for a moment, before whispering against his collar bone. "Any objections to heading to your house?"

                He pulls Shouyou back up a little, nibbling on the skin around his ear, "I suggest we run, because I am really done waiting."


                                                                                                     


 

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"We should be lovers instead."

Notes:

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