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“So...what do you think it’s for?” Matsuda whispered the words almost reverently, staring at L’s desk with a mix of fear and curiosity. L had stepped out of the room for a moment and it was a perfect time to gossip about the mysterious object that had earned a place of uncluttered honor on L’s workspace.
Light sighed and glanced up at Matsuda, adjusting the chain currently connected between his wrist and his desk. “What are you talking about now, Matsuda?” He was perpetually sleepy these days–L kept him up late every night to work– but today had been particularly tiresome given the detective’s foul mood. “What is what for?”
“You know! The red phone!” Matsuda pointed at it and then quickly glanced around. “Who do you think Ryuzaki uses it to call?” He bit his lip and contemplated picking it up, checking for a dial tone, only hesitating when he recalled the way his hand stung the last time he reached for it. I still can’t believe L smacked me... It had never rung once and they’d never witnessed L using it. There were no numbers on the phone, only a landline snaking its way under L’s desk and a little red light that blinked on and off, on and off. “Must be someone important, right? INTERPOL? The President?”
“INTERPOL never uses that.” Light frowned at the yellow sticky note stuck to the phone that read ‘DO NOT TOUCH’ in L’s chicken-scratch kanji. “Could be anyone. I don’t know, why don’t you just ask him?”
Mogi snorted and mumbled, “Already has, about ten times. Give it up already, Matsu.”
“Or, you could ask me,” Aiber suddenly interjected, grinning broadly as he leaned over Matsuda’s shoulder. His eyes were full of mischief and excitement, but that wasn’t a terribly unusual look on his face these days. While this case was exciting, the waiting periods between actually doing something were long and unbearable, which left him with a strong urge to join in on the Task Force’s banter.
“As if you know.” Wedy rolled her eyes, flipping a page in her newspaper as she crossed one leg over the other in her chair. “The only person that even touches it is Watari, and he cleans it more than he cleans the top of Ryuzaki’s desk. He’s had that thing for as long as either of us have known him.”
Matsuda’s eyes lit up as he looked between Aiber and Wedy. “Really? Have you ever seen him use it? Or get a call on it? Come onnnnn, I’m dying of curiosity here.”
Light chuckled quietly and turned back to the data he was working on. “Why do you care so much? It’s just a stupid phone that nobody calls. Probably isn’t even real.”
Matsuda looked horrified at the thought that all his intrigue over this mystery would have been wasted. “Of course it's real! I’ve seen phones like that before…they’re for calling in nuclear codes or…or informing you that the world is ending!”
Light laughed a little harder but kept his eyes on his screen. “Seen them, huh? Where, in a movie? Come on. It's probably a direct line to his dentist given how much sugar he eats.”
“You’re all wrong. Clearly it’s a line for phone-sex,” Aiber muttered, snickering as he glanced back and forth between Light and Matsuda, barely holding back full-on laughter when Matsuda’s face went beet red. “That’s why it never rings.” He ignored the annoyed scoff he heard Wedy make in the background.
“T-that can’t be why!” Matsuda shuddered slightly before dismissing the notion out of hand.
“Finally we agree on something,” Light said under his breath, trying hard to keep a straight face. He took a deep breath to calm down before looking up at Aiber, mischief in his own eyes now. “We all know he uses his voice-modulating phone to call those lines. Security and all.” He only held out a moment before having to giggle into his hand, imagining L’s robotic voice delivering lurid requests to the poor souls on the other end.
Matsuda scoffed, “You’re just covering for him because it’s a top level secret. I get it. But I’m trustworthy! You can tell me.” He gave Aiber his most serious and trustworthy expression, which really didn’t go very far.
“He doesn’t know, Matsui. He’s just pulling your leg. You shouldn’t trust a single thing Aiber says unless it comes from a script someone else writes for him,” Wedy spoke up, her expression now slightly amused as she shot a look at the conman. “He won’t even tell us.”
Sochiro loudly cleared his throat and rustled some papers on his desk. “Don’t you have some work to do, Matsuda? I’m sure I can find you something to do rather than gossip.”
“Y-yes Chief.” Matsuda hung his head a little and returned to his desk, trying not to look dejected as he got back to work.
L returned from the restroom at that moment, refusing to even glance at the others as he settled down into his chair. However, sensing something was off, he glanced around the room after re-attaching his cuff to his wrist, noting the variety of expressions everyone was wearing. “...did I miss something?”
Matsuda looked like he was going to open his mouth but a stern look from Soichiro made him think better of it.
Aiber had no such restraint. “Just speculating about the mysterious red phone,” he said with a sly grin. “Why not put Matsuda out of his misery and tell him what it's for?” At this point, he was just as curious as Matsuda.
L bit back a sigh. He should have expected as much, it had been a while since Matsuda last interrogated him over the purpose of the phone. “I'm starting to suspect that his intense interest in the phone and Misa’s celebrity life is the only thing keeping him here. He's not here to work, clearly,” he deadpanned, turning to stare at Matsuda as he spoke. “Why would I get rid of half of his reason for being here?”
Aiber sighed quietly and turned away to occupy himself with a nearby magazine. “You're not fun anymore,” he murmured under his breath.
Finally, Matsuda stiffened up, taking L’s statements as a threat to his job security as he returned to his desk, frantically trying to appear busy by moving folders and papers around. He desperately wanted to know more about the phone, but not enough to be fired.
Light shot L a look of annoyance and said, “Relax, Ryuzaki. If it wasn’t for Matsuda, we’d never have gotten close to Yotsuba group at all. He’s working as hard as any of us.” L had been in a foul mood for weeks– even leading to them having a brief physical fight. But things had gotten so much worse when Light’s plan to corner the weakest link in Yotsuba group and trick him into temporarily stopping their murders actually worked. L had been against Light’s strategy from the first, and now seemed to take its success as a personal affront.
Rolling his eyes briefly, L turned in his chair to face his screen, refusing to acknowledge Light’s presence even once. He was still silently fuming over the young man’s success. The others had done nothing but praise Light for “saving so many innocent lives.” That's what I get for assuming low-probability would be in my favor. It doesn't make it any less infuriating, though. Perhaps more infuriating was the fact that even he was impressed by the man’s achievement- not that he'd ever say that out loud.
Matsuda sniffed and said softly, “Thank you, Light. That means a lot.”
Light nodded and turned back to his work sullenly. “Of course.” He mumbled under his breath, just loud enough for L to hear, “Someone needs to try to keep people from leaving rather than practically shoving them out the door.”
L’s shoulders stiffened immediately. It took every ounce of strength he had to not dump his cup of now room-temperature coffee on Light, to not just go off at the man. Instead of just falling away like most of Light’s jabs, however, this one lingered. It was hard not to, with Aizawa’s bitter departure still fresh in his mind. Gritting his teeth, he closed his eyes for a few seconds. This is the perfect time. Do it. It's the best way to put him in his place without getting violent. He subtly slid a hand under his desk, pressing a button that has been secretly installed on the underside.
Matsuda almost jumped out of his skin when the red phone began ringing loudly, the light on it blinking amber. His face lost all color as he clutched his chair, wondering if some hellish mixture of all of his worst, most morbid theories about the phone had come to pass. “Oh noooo,” he whined softly, looking around the room and meeting just as surprised faces.
Aiber started, lowering the magazine to stare warily at the device. I guess we will find out what it's for today...what an interesting coincidence. Though, I guess if Matsuda talks about it all the time, it's not that surprising…
Light’s head snapped up immediately, mostly surprised that the thing actually worked . If it was real, was Matsuda right and something terrible was about to happen?
L gave the task force a few seconds to panic and worry before calmly reaching out and picking up the phone. He had briefly noticed Watari leaving the room as soon as it began to ring. Not even going to stay to witness the conclusion? A shame. He held the receiver up to his ear, listening to the dial tone as if someone was speaking. “Hello? Yes, this is L. Oh? Is that so?” He turned to face Light completely, staring at him for a second or two before holding it out to him. “Light, it's for you. It's the person that cares.” The quip barely sounded like a joke in his monotone voice.
Light stared at L blankly for a moment before he flushed with anger and embarrassment. His hand was shaking as he balled it into a fist, barely restraining himself from plowing it into L’s smug face. “You…!” It was one thing to be a petty, bitter ass when they were alone in their room but in front of the team? He exhaled hard and snatched the receiver and held it to his ear, eyes on fire as he glared at L. “Yes, this is Light, one of the sane members of the Kira Task Force.” A thin smirk appeared on his lips as he pretended to listen, speaking into the phone, “Oh yes, I completely agree he’s practically intolerable…mmhm, highly unprofessional as well–”
L narrowed his eyes, only getting angrier and more irritable as Light spoke. So that's how we're playing this game? Fine. He reached out, suddenly jerking the phone out of the man’s grip, returning it to his ear. “Don't listen to him. He’s one to talk, rearranging other people's property and going through their things without permission. Pompous, self-obsessed, and infuriatingly uptight. He's a square with a stick firmly lodged up his–”
Light gasped and wrenched the phone from L’s grip, barely bothering to speak into it versus hissing directly at L. “I’d rather be a square than build my career on the destruction of others’ basic human rights . Or call myself an agent of the law while treating the laws as mere suggestions that can be flouted at a whim . Oh but we’re all at the mercy of Ryuzaki’s whims , and have to endure his foul moods and tiresome antics just to continue this case! I think I preferred being illegally confined to his private prison cell than actually living with him!”
L’s rage was only building higher and higher. He lunged forward, grabbing and wrestling the phone from Light’s hold with an angry grunt before holding it up to his head. “Such negative insinuations and accusations. One might think it was a tactic from Kira to turn people against L!” He snapped, glaring at Light. “Perhaps a Freudian slip, your own guilt requesting imprisonment for your crimes?”
Light set his jaw and took a deep breath, saying calmly, “I think you’re able to turn people against you well enough on your own.” He glanced briefly at Aizawa’s empty desk, papers still scattered on top of it from where the man had left in a hurry. “You seem to need my help for everything else, but not that .”
That was all it took. L’s anger and irritation had morphed into pure fury. Seeing red, he threw the receiver down in the general direction of the phone, failing to reseat it but not caring to fix it. He was almost blinded by rage, no longer capable of thinking rationally about the potential results of what he might say next. “Oh? Well at least I haven't abandoned my family while pursuing a case just to appease my own guilt over fracturing my perfect image and my massive ego!” He spat, clenching his fists.
“That’s ENOUGH!” Soichiro abruptly stood up from his desk, knocking his chair back with a screech of metal.
Light didn’t even hear his father, he was too shocked by what L had said. Most of that wasn’t true– he was handcuffed here, he wasn’t choosing this. I haven’t abandoned them. But it still hurt badly when he hadn’t seen his mother or sister in months, when they believed he’d been disowned by his father as a cover for why he had to stay away. The perfect, cruelest retort was right there on the tip of his tongue. At least I have a family. But he couldn’t voice it. Instead he grabbed the phone and tore it out of the wall, storming towards the door to the hallway without remembering he was still chained to L. He only made it a few feet before his wrist caught, but he kept on going, determined to drag L the entire way if he had to.
L saw it, saw the brief cruelty in Light’s eyes. As a moment of clarity finally washed over him, the rebuttal he knew Light would have thought of hit him. It carved a place out inside him, settling there like a cold pit in his stomach, along with the uncomfortable knowledge that Light didn't say it . He couldn't understand why that sudden realization made him feel so odd. Before he had time to dwell on that, however, his wrist was being pulled. He almost fell out of his chair and onto the floor, managing to scramble to his feet and stumble after Light at the last minute. He staggered after the man, almost tripping on the dangling phone cord as he followed him. Where does he even think he's going? Is he planning to try and kill me with the phone or the cord? What's going on here?
Aiber stared after the pair as they left the room, struggling to actually register what just happened. This whole time...all these years...the phone was just an elaborate, passive-aggressive prank?
Light strode down the hallway towards the elevator, breathing hard and yanking the chain every few feet to get L to keep up. “I’m done ,” he hissed furiously over his shoulder. “Take me back to the cell or cuff me to something in the bedroom but I’m done with you today.” He knew he had no choice but to keep working with L on the case if he had any hope of clearing his name, but he couldn’t stand to look at the man anymore today.
L still felt that anger lingering, each jerk of the chain reigniting that spark. He tried to tug it back a few times in frustration, but to no avail, still following Light into the elevator in the end. Alone with the man, he gritted his teeth for a moment before suddenly grabbing him by the arm. “ You’re done? As if you're so easy and pleasant to get along with!” He snapped, narrowing his eyes.
Light mashed the elevator button to the 17th floor and rounded on L. “I don’t see anyone else on the team having a problem with me!” He pushed L against the wall as the elevator began to rise, snarling, “Just admit that you can’t stand that I had a better idea than you did, and that’s why you’re treating me like this.” He held up the phone for evidence before dropping it with a loud clang! “It’s not even about me being Kira, is it? It’s about the possibility that I’m really not him, which means you were wrong, wrong, wrong .” He smiled smugly, getting right in L’s face. “Better get used to that feeling, Ryuzaki.”
The pinning didn't surprise L too much. He expected violence after that argument, expected some kind of fight. However, he didn't expect the closeness. Light was barely a few inches from his face, staring into his eyes as he spoke. It made his blood boil, but something else was rising inside him, too. His mouth opened and closed dumbly for a moment, the swirl of emotions rendering him speechless, until something finally kicked in. He stood there for a moment more before suddenly leaning in, closing what little distance was between them, pressing his lips against Light’s.
Light froze in absolute shock, eyes going wide at the soft sensation of L’s lips against his. He’d expected a punch, a kick, more biting words. He’d thought that he could predict everything the detective could do to trick and confuse him, but he would have never anticipated this. Later he’d blame the adrenaline from their fight and his exhaustion from too little sleep and too much work, but instead of pushing L away, he leaned in . He grabbed L’s shirt and pressed against him, deepening the kiss until it was frantic, nearly violent.
L threw his arms around Light, tugging and gripping his shirt as he returned the increasingly rough kiss. It felt like everything around them had stopped, like the only thing that existed was the two of them.
After a few moments Light broke away and stepped back, looking completely lost and bewildered. Not just at L, but at his own actions. He whispered, “W-what are you doing?”
L was left breathless, panting with an equally confused look on his face. He couldn't understand it, couldn't comprehend why he did that. Shaking his head slowly, he lifted a hand to rub his forehead. “I'm- I'm supposed to...I thought I hate you,” he whispered, furrowing his brows. “Why..? You- you infuriate me...your smug confidence, your intellect, your multi-talented nature, your good looks...I don't- I don't understand ...”
“Did you just…say something nice about me?” Light couldn’t help but laugh in amazement. He ran a nervous hand through his hair and when the elevator door opened, he automatically pressed the ‘close door’ button. He felt planted to this spot until something made sense, and it felt as if he let L out of his sight, he’d just deny the whole thing even happened. “Ryuzaki, are you trying to tell me that all your shitty behavior is because you…had a crush on me?”
L furrowed his brows, shaking his head again. He looked genuinely at a loss. “No, no, I don't...that's nonsense, it's-...” He trailed off, actually taking a moment to go over things as logically as he could. Going over the mental checklist in his head, categorizing behaviors based on how much they correlated with infatuation...the results slowly became clear to him. Once again, infuriatingly, it seemed like Light was correct. “I...have a crush on you?” He finally echoed, not yet able to fully see the consequences, far too shocked and confused to consider anything beyond this moment.
Light touched his lips absently, unable to take his eyes off of L. “I should be furious, you know.” He took a cautious step closer, still wary this was a new kind of trick. “This is taking ‘unprofessional’ to a whole new level.” He arched a brow and smirked slightly. “Which I didn’t believe was possible for you.” He took another step, until they were nearly as close as when L kissed him. “Conflicts of interest…even more human rights violations…and what would my father think? What would INTERPOL think?” He placed one hand on the wall beside L, unable to hold back an expression of amused triumph, a win seemingly falling into his lap.
L’s breath hitched as Light grew close to him again, practically pinning him against the wall. Even though he knew he could push Light away and escape, he felt trapped. Not just trapped by the other man, but trapped by himself. He didn't want to flee, despite how far out of his comfort zone he was right now. Light’s smug expression was making him feel unspeakable things. Kira is still in there somewhere... “I don't really care about what they think, and I know you're aware of that.” He paused, meeting the man’s gaze. His face felt like it was on fire, and he desperately wanted to kiss him again. “But what do you think?”
“I think that the next time you want to talk to me, you don’t need to use a fake phone.” Light looked down at the broken red phone, his gaze traveling across the cuff around his wrist before meeting L’s enormous gray eyes. “‘It’s the person who cares,’ that’s what you said.” He tilted his head as he scrutinized L’s face, noticing details he’d never had the chance to see before. Pale freckles dotted his nose like a constellation. “I think that may have been the first truthful thing you’ve ever said to me.”
L shivered under Light’s intense gaze. It felt almost as if the man could see into his very soul, but that wasn't possible or logical. Yet, somehow, he felt more vulnerable now than he ever had before. “I-...” A million vague platitudes and dismissals bubbled up, born of an instinctive intention to brush the remark away and return back to the comfortable normal of before. This was a threshold he had a feeling he couldn't go back from crossing. “...yes. I believe you're right.” He took a shaky breath, wetting his lips nervously. “But I have to ask...do you care, Light? Or am I setting myself up for an inevitable demise?”
Light stopped short of his usual protests as an emotion he couldn’t identify washed over him. It was something akin to having a word on the tip of your tongue–where you
know
that word is somewhere locked away in your brain yet frustratingly inaccessible. He knew he wasn’t Kira,
couldn’t
be Kira. But despite that, he also knew somehow that L’s fear was completely justified. He picked up the receiver of the red phone, pressing it into L’s hand with a soft smile. “Nothing’s inevitable, Ryuzaki.”