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Dan has gone to bed and Herb is left alone in the lab. Well not really alone, they had just gone on a truly lovely date to the graveyard and brought back Amanda. She smells a bit, but she can not be blamed for that as corpses do not know how to use deodorant. He pulls her up onto the bench to prepare for the green goo treatment. He tries to heave her up but after awhile he gives up trying on his own, is arms too weak to lift her. He leaves her slumped against the counter as he goes to wake Dan.
“Well Amanda dearest you really are a deadweight,” he says running away with an evil little giggle. He’s in no rush to complete the reanimation so he goes to enjoy a session of hysterical laughter at his own joke in the storage closet designated for such activities.
Throughout this Amanda continues to slump against the bench, possibly she is also judging the interior design of the lab. She is just an unproductive queen like that.
...
BUT NOT FOR LONG!
The vibrations of Herbert’s laughter shake the building and she flops from leaning on the bench to lying on the floor! Not only does Amanda fall but the green goo, who from now on we will call Augustus, sloshes out of his beaker which was situated in from of Dan’s “Feel safe at night, Sleep with a medical student” poster, and lands with a loud ploop in the eye of a severed head Herb had accidentally left out of the freezer for a few nights. The eye hops away using the optic nerve as a foot, leaving the sunken eyehole filled with the glowing Augustus. He sinks through the head’s rotting tissue, mixing with the decaying brain tissue which begins to stir sluggishly within his gooeyness. He grows in size as he consumes the dead head before plooping once again, but this time onto the floor, Amanda staring blankly, perhaps in horror or perhaps in that corpsey way she has. If you go to brunch with her, you can ask. Augustus blobs his way over too her, splatting onto her leg and quickly growing to encase her whole body. He wants to show the world he is not like the other green goo, he goes on the outside of corpses, he’s quirky like that. Amanda blinks. She looks mildly surprised and reaches into her pocket, pulling out an undefined grey mass and begins crocheting. Attracted by the yarn, the lab’s resident cat Willam approaches Augustus somewhat cautiously at first but for no particular reason he decides Augustus is a friend and jumps right on in. Amanda is rather peeved at this intrusion, so Willam is left to stare forlornly at her wool from the other size of Augustus’ insides.
“Babe?” Dan enters the lab. He follows the sound of Herbert’s wheezes of laughter to the storage closet. “You’ve been in there quite a while; I brought you a glass of water.”
Herb takes the glass and takes a drink only to start giggling again and inhale some water. Dan and Herb are too distracted by attempting the Heimlich Manoeuvre and dying respectively to notice Augustus slowly growing in size, beginning to fill up the lab. Herbert is starting to turn blue but because of Augustus’ green glow and the generally bad lighting of the lab, Dan doesn’t notice and takes Herb’s silence to mean he has recovered. Dan is not a particularly good med student. He may not be able to do basic first aid, but Dan does know what a corpse looks like and is devastated at the death of his darling. He turns from the body to get some green goo, he may be sad about the death, but it is also the third time this has happened this week, and he is being to become desensitised to reanimating his boyfriend.
Unfortunately for Dan’s number of steps on this particular day, he does not need to go far to get green goo as Augustus has started spilling into the store cupboard. Dan barely has time to react to the strange sight of Amanda waving at him through Augustus before Herb is standing next to him and they are both encased in Augustus. Hand in hand they make their way to the desk to check their notes to work out what on earth is going on, but the paper has become illegible because it is soaked through with green goo.
Augustus expands and expands covering Miskatonic University then the continent, the oceans and the WHOLE WORLD. As a side effect of Augustus is compulsive queerness Dan and Herb were free to live out their dream of digging up every corpse ever in the history of the world, mixing them up and putting them together again.
And that is why the sky is green, the air feels gooey, and we can swim to the moon.