Work Text:
"Where were you all night?"
Oh. So it was one of those days.
"You know where I was," Bruce replied calmly. It was important for him to remain calm in these moments. Joker was rehabilitated now, but he still had his… episodes. He needed reassurance. Bruce’s reassurance, to be exact.
"Oh, I know, do I?" Joker’s lips were pursed into a tight like, his arms crossed over his chest. He looked like he'd been up all night and knowing him, Bruce wasn't surprised.
"Jay, you know me better than anyone," mmmaybe not as well as Alfred, but still, "you know where I was."
He took a step closer and tentatively reached to pull Joker into his embrace. Jay needed the physical reassurance, Bruce’s warmth, his touch, those things calmed him down better than anything. Bruce could only hope it would work now too. And it did! For about a minute. Joker leaned into his touch, looking pained, like he'd been needing this for a long time. He was scared, Bruce realized. He'd probably been scared this entire time, needing Bruce by his side, to hold him, to keep him straight. But Bruce wasn't there. It must’ve been really rough on Joker.
"You know I love you, don’t you?" Bruce whispered, but when he tried to kiss Joker's neck, just below the ear where he liked it, Joker pulled away almost violently.
"No. No, don't do this." He put more distance between himself and Bruce, and wrapped the purple dressing gown he'd been wearing more tightly around his neck, like a lady protecting her modesty. "You’re tricking me again! You know I can't resist you, so you're distracting me from our conversation. I know what you’re doing, ohhhh, I know that! But you can't do it this time!"
"Jay…” Perhaps it would be more difficult to soothe him today. “Why don't you tell me what's been bothering you?" Bruce offered with a sigh.
"Oh, like I need to spell it out for you?" Joker looked mad for about a second, then his expression turned sad, and somehow that made it even worse. Bruce hated that look on Jay’s face. And he hated it even more that he put it there.
“I’m sorry. Just tell me what I did wrong,” Bruce pleaded patiently.
"Catwoman!" Joker cried out. "You've been out all night and I just know it was with her!"
Oh, boy.
"It was Penguin,” Bruce said.
Joker laughed loudly, and it almost sounded like one of his laughing fits from back in the day. “Ha! Penguin, really! You expect me to believe that?”
"It was on the news..."
Joker glared. “It was! And then it was over, and you didn’t come home!” He tried to suppress a sob, but Bruce knew well that Jay wasn’t that good at hiding his emotions. “She-- she was released…” He shook his head, messy green curls covering his eyes almost completely. “On the night she's released, you don't come home. What am I supposed to think!"
Well, at least it made much more sense why he was upset now. Bruce could deal with this. He only had to tell Joker the truth.
"I haven't seen Selina in a long time, Jay," he said, pleased with himself that he could handle this so well. Surely, that will calm Joker down now.
However, his words did not have the desired reaction. Joker’s eyes went wide, and he glared even more.
" Selina?” He repeated bitterly. “Selina… You always do that, you always call her by her name."
"Well, it is her name..."
"I'm the one who makes the jokes around here!" Joker threw his hands in the air angrily.
Bruce smirked. "Not my fault the student surpasses the teacher.”
He had the nativity to wink at that statement, expecting the joke to light up the mood. Usually, Joker liked it when Bruce joked. He loved Bruce’s sense of humor, and he loved Bruce’s laughter. But not this time, apparently. This time things were serious.
Bruce stopped smiling. "Alright. I get it. You needed me here and I wasn't around. You knew Catwoman was out and because of my history with her, you thought--"
"You almost married her, Bruce. That's some history."
" Almost being the key word here,” Bruce reminded. “You know who I didn't almost marry? You. I actually married you, and it's been years and I haven’t regretted it."
Joker's face softened a little. "You haven't?" he asked quietly, looking so vulnerable.
"Not even once," Bruce said, taking a step closer to Joker to hold his hands.
"Not even when I'm being… like this?" He hung his head.
Bruce kissed Jay’s temple and lifted his face up to meet his gaze. “Never, Jay,” he said.
Joker let him wrap his arms around his waist and the two looked into each other's eyes.
"Do you regret it?" Bruce asked after a short pause. It wasn't just a ploy to distract Joker or to calm him down. It was genuinely something Bruce had been secretly worried about. Joker gave up a lot to be with Bruce. And sure, being The Joker wasn’t the best thing one could be, but it was who Jay used to be. It was all he knew how to be. Literally, since he still had no memories of his life before Joker. Bruce didn’t strip down the cape, he was still Batman. It would be understandable if this was difficult on Joker now and then. "I know you gave up a lot for me."
Jay shook his head. “I didn’t do it just for you. I did it for me too.” He inhaled deeply. “I don’t regret it. Sometimes I do miss it. And then it’s really hard, I won't deny that. But I look at you and I know why I did it.”
"For me?" Bruce purred. It wasn't very healthy to be Joker's only reason not to kill, but it was a start.
“That’s some ego, Batsy,” Joker snorted. “I said I didn’t do it for you. I’m a selfish clown. I saw this life we could have together, and I grabbed it! I… I love our life, Bruce. I love us.”
There used to be a time when Batman felt like giving up. Rehabilitating the Joker of all people, what was he thinking?! Everyone told him he was the insane one for even conceiving this idea. But here they were now, 7 years later, married, together, open to one another, and still so blissfully in love. Jay was happy here, he was happy with who he was now. He didn’t need his old life. He didn’t need Bruce or Batman, not really. Bruce wasn’t here just to keep the madness inside the Joker from going off on a murder spree. He was here because he too loved his life with Jay. He, too, loved them.
Jay looked up to meet Bruce’s eyes, and he gasped.
“Why, Brucie! You’re crying…”
Bruce quickly reached up and realized that Jay was right. His cheeks were wet with the few tears that rolled down his eyes on their own volition.
“Did I make you sad?” Jay asked, worried.
Bruce shook his head and smiled. “No. You make me very, very happy.”
I love us too.