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It wasn’t often that you had to attend these parties that were hosted by the wealthy, dangerous gang members who liaised with your boyfriend’s Brooklyn gang.
Still, when you did, every second was filled with anxiety and panic, expecting every stranger who waltzed past to attack either of your boyfriends.
Today, every instinct of yours was in “flight mode”, wanting nothing more than to stay home with Steve and Bucky, ignoring the world, but instead, you were hiding in the bathrooms, trying not to have a panic attack as the party was in full swing.
All day you’d been trying to prepare for this mentally, determined not to let your anxiety get the best of you, but all the breathing exercises in the world couldn’t prepare you for this, and slowly, you could feel yourself falling into your safe space.
It wasn’t necessarily a subdrop that you were experiencing, but it was close enough, as when you reached this point, you would stare at the floor, not wanting to look anyone in the eye, you’d feel sick to your stomach, hands shaking as your heart would pound violently in your chest.
Your mind is filling with endless self-doubt.
It was closer to a panic attack than subspace, but there was nothing that could usually bring you out of it other than escaping from the situation and being surrounded by love and warmth.
You weren’t even lucky enough to try and cling to Steve or Bucky during this event, as they’d both been dragged off to god-knows-where as soon as you all arrived at the party, leaving you with your bodyguard for the night, Sam Wilson.
He was a good friend of yours and made friendly company, but as the hours ticked by, everything slowly became too much for you to handle.
Leaving the safety of the bathroom, you saw Sam leaning against the wall opposite, smiling lightly as he spotted you approaching slowly, his hand rubbing up your arm and not making eye contact.
He’d noticed something was different about you from the moment the party had begun; not even the occasional kiss on the cheek from Steve or Bucky as they sauntered past could bring a genuine smile to your face.
Joining him against the wall, you watched the hustle of drunk partiers strolling by, the sound of the bass music beating in time with your pounding heartbeat.
“Everything ok over there, Boss Lady?” Sam asked, leaning down slightly so you could hear him.
Trying your best to be believable, you smiled, responding with, “I’m fine!” but really, you just wanted to go home, especially looking across the room and spotting Steve and Bucky surrounded by a group of beautiful women who were standing a fraction too close for your liking.
Your throat became tight as you looked away, thoughts spiralling to things you knew weren’t true, but your anxieties were your own worst enemy.
Perhaps they preferred to be with those other girls.
You should go home rather than be a disappointment to them, and then they may detest you for the remainder of the party.
Sam had noticed your declining mental health, the way your shoulders hunched, the nervous glances at every person that passed, he knew he needed to check just how far you were gone with your anxieties, having been there once when it truly became too much, you became non-verbal and hyperventilated until losing consciousness.
Making sure his movements were slow, Sam gently pulled your hand until you were both in a quieter part of the corridor.
Lifting his hands, he cupped your cheeks, his thumbs swiping across to try to soothe you, but all you did was continue to look at the floor.
“Do you want to go home?” he asked, trying to sound as calm as he could.
Before you could answer, though, Sam took notice of the thumping in the vein under his fingers along your neck.
At first, he thought it was the bass from the music, but as he felt the quickened thump of your heartbeat.
He knew instantly that he needed to get you out of there before your panic attack began.
Taking your hand once more, your bodyguard tugged you swiftly through the crowd and to your boyfriends, who were now by themselves next to the bar.
Initially, you tried to stay behind Sam, not wanting to talk to either man as you felt sick to your stomach, but Bucky was instantly by your side, cocooning you in his muscular arms, kissing your cheek, “there you are, hot mama, I’ve been looking for my best girl.”
Typically, his actions would have you giggling and your chest filled with love for the man, but instead, you wanted to be anywhere else, feeling overwhelmed and conflicted with your thoughts.
Bucky didn’t initially notice your discomfort, but Steve did, eyes narrowing as he took in your tense demeanour as Sam informed them, “My boss lady and I are heading home”.
Steve and Bucky’s eyes flicked to the bodyguard, hearing the concern in his voice.
Sam checked you weren’t looking at him before he pointed to his neck, shaking his head.
Bucky subtly lifted his hand, resting it against your neck and feeling for himself the beating of your heart, his eyes worriedly snapping to Steve’s as his jaw clenched, neither realising before just how close you were to reaching your limit.
Steve leaned forward towards Bucky, whispering “sort the rest of the shit out here, I’m going to take her home”, Bucky’s arms dropped from around your shaking form, as he moved to quickly speak to the multitude of gangsters that he and Steve had planned to make business with during the party.
Steve now turned to Sam, nodding towards the exit, and the man knew he was to meet you both in the car.
From the corner of your eye, you could see Sam starting to leave, and you moved to follow him, but Steve swiftly gripped your upper arm, pulling you in the opposite direction.
You followed in a blur, feeling sick to your stomach at being separated from Sam, not wanting to discuss anything with Steve, but also confused as to where he was taking you as he moved deeper into the venue, down empty corridors before finding an empty room with a single desk in the centre.
You could feel your eyes burning from the tears that were welling up as Steve pulled you along towards the desk, your chest aching from the tightness that was constricting it as he finally picked you up and placed you on the desk, your feet dangling from the floor as he stood between your legs.
His hands were rough as they gripped your jaw tightly, tilting it and forcing you to look up into his bright blue eyes, which were swirling with worry.
But you still desperately tried to look anywhere but into his eyes, being overcome with emotions.
He didn’t loosen his hold, however, as his deep voice calmly demanded, “Take a deep breath for me.”
Steve’s words dawned on you as in your panic, you hadn’t been continuing your strict breathing exercises so when you tried to do as instructed, all you could do was choke as you tried to suck in a deep breath, your tight throat stopping you.
Steve stayed calm as he watched the tears slip down your cheeks, his thumbs catching them and stroking them away as he watched your body sway from the waves of dizziness, as he continued, “That’s it, and another breath, nice and deep, well done”.
With each passing breath, your throat and chest eased so you were able to take in more air, finding that the dizziness was starting to pass until finally, you were sucking in deep breaths without any issues.
Fully looking at your boyfriend now, you saw the corners of his lips turn up as he moved on to trying to calm down your anxieties, “You’re doing so good for me baby, now, I need you to know that you are safe, you are with me, I’ll always protect what’s mine, no one is going to hurt you.”
Initially, you still felt queasy.
Still, as Steve’s calming voice continued, your muscles started to relax and you found yourself leaning more into his touch, “Listen to my voice, look into my eyes, baby, you are mine. You are Bucky’s. We are yours and will always be yours”.
He lifted his eyebrows in a questioning manner, waiting for your response, his eyes flicking between both of yours.
Finally, you nodded, lost in his comfort and safety.
The mafia boss released your face, and you instantly felt a loss as the warmth was gone.
Still, you sat silently and watched as he shrugged off his black blazer, quickly moving to wrap it around your shoulders.
Instantly, you were cloaked in his body heat and scents, which also helped to calm any negative thoughts that were slowly silencing in your mind.
Before long, his large hands were cupping your cheeks once more as you now willingly met his stare, he looked as if he was going to say something but stopped himself, instead opting to inch forward to kiss your forehead, taking in a deep breath, subtly smelling your scents that helped to calm him before moving back.
“I want you to repeat after me: I am yours, and you are mine.”
You tried to repeat his words, feeling your heart fill with warmth as you stuttered through the sentence.
He asked you to keep repeating it, joining in until both of you were saying the exact words, his forehead now leaning against yours, so you were both breathing in the same air, and your anxieties floated away, your shoulders dropping from their tense stance.
Finally, the two of you simply held onto each other in silence, feeling exhausted from the emotional rollercoaster that had been the evening, and guilt was starting to weigh heavily on your minds.
Still, you knew you had no reason for your internal panic.
Opening your mouth, you had planned to apologise, but Steve was quick to cover your lips with his rough palm, smirking down with a twinkle in his eyes as he muttered, “I don’t want to hear anything but sweet little moans coming out of your mouth, do you understand?”
Almost immediately, your abdomen clenched, your thighs rubbing together as your eyes dropped from his blue ones to his full lips, watching every movement, surprised by how quickly his distractions worked, as you wanted nothing more than to attach yourself to his beautiful mouth.
Nodding against his hand, you stayed silent as he released his grasp on your mouth, his touch moving down to your hips to pull you from the table, making sure you were steady on your feet before leaning down to kiss you.
The kiss is soft and delicate, but still leaves you breathless as he pulls away, reaching down to grasp your hand and then lifting to gently kiss across your knuckles before pulling you out of the room.
You’d hope to spot Bucky as the two of you made your way once more through the crowded party, but he was nowhere to be seen as Steve was quick to distract you by pulling you in close to his side before finally, you were stood before his car with Sam in the driver's seat.
Steve helped you into the backseat, pulling your seatbelt across your chest, and then quickly kissed you on the tip of your nose before jumping into the seat beside you.
His large hands were quick to hold yours, thumb stroking across the skin while you rested your head on his shoulder, eyes closing as you simply breathed in his intoxicating scent, smiling as he kissed the top of your head.
During the journey home, you slipped into a restful sleep, your head lolling forward, but Steve was quick to put pressure on your forehead, tipping it back so you wouldn’t strain your neck.
Finally, the two of your arrived home, and even though you had woken as he unclipped your seatbelt, with Sam holding open the door for you both, Steve still eased his arms under your body and lifted you from the car, causing you to giggle and wrap your arms quickly around his neck, holding onto him tightly.
The blonde man wished Sam goodnight as he carried you up through the house and to the bedroom, effortlessly easing you down into the centre of the bed, leaning over the top of you and looking down at you with affection.
However, the self-doubt still teetered in your thoughts as you couldn’t help but whisper, “I’m sorry”.
His hand was quick to move to cover your mouth, much like it had been back in the party, “I still don’t want to hear those words coming out of your mouth, understand?” He released his hand on your mouth to allow you to answer.
“Yes”.
He turned his head slightly to the side as he asked, “Yes, what?”
You smiled coyly up at him, “Yes, sir.”
He started to smirk, clearly hearing the correct words as he then continued, “That’s right, baby girl and remember, I am yours and you are mine”.
Before you could respond, he leaned down and kissed you passionately, lips moving together feverishly, causing your back to arch up, desperate to feel him more.
Your hands gripped his crisp white shirt, pulling him closer, and your tongue slipped between his lips as you tilted your head, allowing the kiss to deepen.
A low growl vibrated in his chest.
Pulling back, his lips now slightly puffy from the kiss, he looked down at your body, “I want to touch every inch of your body”.
Your cheeks warmed under his intense gaze, wanting him to do just what he had said.
Steve helped to pull off his blazer, which was still wrapped around your body, leaving an open-mouthed kiss along the exposed skin of your arms.
Next, he eased the material of your dress up and over your head, disposing of it to the floor as he bit his lip, having forgotten that Bucky had made sure that you hadn’t worn any underwear under your dress, so you were laid out beneath him in nothing but your heeled shoes.
His large, warm hands travelled across every inch of your body, living up to his words, leaving a trail of goosebumps due to the soft touches, but they were also driving you wild, your breathing coming hot and heavy as he lightly brushed over your pebbled nipples.
The ache between your legs was nearly unbearable as he leaned over to kiss you once more, hand cupping your jaw and the other slipping to hold onto your hip.
Your legs wrapped around his waist as you tried desperately to roll your centre against his trouser-covered bulge, but he kept the slightest bit back, loving to see you mewl beneath him.
Trying a different approach, you dropped your hands from his chest and to his zipper, pulling it down and already feeling the twitch of his cock as it was already rock hard beneath his legs.
Steve's lips left yours, causing you to moan louder at the loss of contact, but he only chuckled deeply, gripping onto your wrists delicately as he lifted them above your head, moving to hold them there easily with one hand.
“Please, sir, I need you so bad”.
“I know sweetheart, I can feel how wet you are through my pants, don’t worry you’ll get my cock soon enough” his voice was deep as he spoke, just staring down at your body, trying to memorise every detail of how beautiful you looked in that moment but as you gasped again, legs tightening around his wrist, he moved to start pulling his zipper down, seeing the relief in your eyes as you watched him.
His cock was pulled out in less than a second and you marvelled in its beautiful, long and thick, veins pulsing up the shaft as he started to gently move it up and down your fold, spreading the juices that were near enough dripping out of you.
Your eyes closed in satisfaction, particularly as his tip brushed against your already swollen clit, causing you to pant and grind your hips.
Now it was Steve’s turn to feel pent up, seeing how easily you reacted to his touches, small beads of pre-cum started to leak from his tip.
With a hand at the base of his cock, he positioned it to your quivering entrance, knowing you both needed this now, not wanting to waste time with foreplay as he started to push in.
Both of you gasped as intense pleasure bloomed through both of your abdomens, Steve loving the feeling of your tight cunt squeezing around him, watching as inch-by-inch, you took all of him until he was fully sheathed.
Opening your eyes, you bite your lip while looking up at your boyfriend, loving the power difference between the two of you.
You lay there, with no clothes, hands held above your head so you couldn’t move, whilst he was still fully dressed, having complete control over the situation.
Steve waited a few moments for your pussy to adjust to the intrusion of his girthy cock, the burn from the stretch slowly easing to pure bliss as his hand trailed from between your legs, up to cup one of your breasts, pinching the nipple between his thumb and forefinger, the tingling sensations shooting across your chest helping the ache blooming in your centre.
Finally, Steve started to pull out halfway before swiftly moving back in, “I’m going to make you cum so many times baby girl that you’re going to forget your name, let’s start quickly shall we?”
Before you had time to comprehend his words, he started to pick up his pace, cock slamming into your cunt, your whole body rocking on the bed as he released your nipple to begin rubbing his fingers against your clit in a circle, matching his thrusts and all you could do was lie back and shout his name in ecstasy.
It took no time at all for him skilful hands and thrusts had your orgasm pulsing through your pussy, legs holding him impossibly close as you squeezed his cock tightly as waves of pleasure erupted throughout you.
“Good girl, that’s it” Steve praised, not pausing in his thrusts, fucking you through your orgasm.
Suddenly you found your wrists free to move as he released them, driving both of his palms to lay on your collarbones, the width of his hands meant that they circled your neck as he used this grip to hold you to the bed, the touch intimate but ruthless as you once again could only lay there and take the pleasure, “Say you’re mine” he grunted.
“I’m yours- fuck, sir that feels so good, oh god” you desperately whimpered gripping onto his wrists, looking up into his intense blue eyes, beads of sweat starting to drip from his forehead.
“That’s it, baby, I can feel you’re already close, say you’re Buckys” he grunted, slapping his hips into yours, loving that your second orgasm was always quick to build when being fucked hard.
“I’m Buckys! I’m yours, sir, fuck, I'm cuming!” your eyes rolled back as you tried to arch your back up but his grip on your upper body had you trapped to the bed, but it didn’t stop your legs from shaking, unable to keep around his waist anymore as they collapse to the sides.
Steve halted his thrusts, not wanting to entirely overwhelm you, as the waves of pleasure were more intense this time, his cock being compressed in your warm hole.
He once again started to move his hands over your body, helping to soothe you through your orgasm, small shivers still erupted throughout your limbs, though as you smiled up at him with a glassy expression in your eyes.
Cupping your cheek, Steve asked, “Are you still with me, sweetheart?” You nodded your head in confirmation, turning your head to kiss his palm as he smiled down at you.
Reaching beside him, he lifted both of your legs until your heeled covered feet rested on his shoulders, hands then resting on your thighs, helping to hold them up as the new angle allowed him to thrust to hit deeper as he started to rotate his hips slowly.
Steve now took his time with his thrusts, savouring in every little twitch and clench that your body produced, holding intense eye contact with you.
It was just as he moved his fingers further around your thighs to reach and press his fingers against your clit, did you accidentally push your heel into his shoulder hard enough for him to wince, your eyes opening wide and apologies rushing out of your lips.
But he simply smiled down at you and continued his thrusts as he turned to kiss each of your ankles, removing each shoe gently.
Once they were thrown over his shoulders, he opened your legs. He collapsed over the top of you, leaning on his forearms as he started to kiss you deeply, before moving to your neck, sucking on the sweet spot between your neck and shoulder as your hands fell into his blonde hair, pulling on it tightly.
He managed to make you cum an additional two times before Bucky arrived home via taxi, his ears perking up to the sounds of your gasps that echoed down the hall.
As he walked into the bedroom, he simply stood there, watching as you were now on all fours in the middle of the bed, Steve relentlessly slapping his hips into yours, spanking on your arse cheeks until they were sore. Still, the pain and pleasure combo had you left in a state of extreme euphoria.
Steve acknowledged his best friend with a subtle nod before looking down at you again, loving the pleas slipping from your lips as he felt his orgasm on the very brink of releasing.
Bucky approached, shrugging off his blazer and sitting on the floor at the edge of the bed near your head.
Reaching forward, he stroked your head, snapping your attention towards him. “Bu-buc-” you mumbled, trying to go for him.
Still, he could see in your eyes that you were overstimulated and feeling spaced out.
“Shhh, it’s ok, hot mama, I’m here, you’re doing so well for Steve,” he praised, continuing to stroke along with your head and down your spine, calming your spasming muscles.
Hearing Steve’s grunts intensifying, Bucky glanced up to his boss, seeing that he was close to cuming so he reached underneath your body and applied pressure to your already sensitive clit.
“Are you going to be a good girl for us and cum one more time? I know you can do it Doll”.
You didn’t need to be told twice as the pounding of Steve’s cock and the feeling of Bucky's hand on your bundle of nerves had you twitching uncontrollably, the warm sensation quickly flooding throughout your cunt and thighs, breath hitching in your throat as you came hard once more.
At the same time, Steve tipped his head back, groaning deeply as he released his seed deep into your pussy, feeling his cock twitch with each spurt of liquid before finally finishing.
Bucky caught your body before you could fully collapse onto the bed, whilst Steve eased himself out of you, before moving to the bathroom, removing his clothes and starting to run the water in the sizeable tub.
The brunette man moved to hold you in his lap, not caring about the cum that was dripping out of you and onto his trousers as he tenderly kissed your forehead.
Looking up at him tiredly, you managed to whisper, “I missed you”.
He smiled down at you, eyes flicking across your face as he responded, “I’ve missed you too, Doll. Now, let’s get you all cleaned up.”
Lifting you against his chest, he was able to carry you into the bathroom, where he saw Steve was already settled into the half-full tub, his arms out, ready to help you in.
As each body part was eased into the water you gasped, not realising how much your body was aching from the fucking you’d been given.
Relaxing back against Steve’s chest, you tiredly watch Bucky undress before stepping in as well, your eyes zoning in on the rock-hard cock that was bouncing up between his legs as he sat opposite you.
Seeing where your eyes had been looking, he grinned cockily over to you, finding it endearing how you tried to hide your face at being caught staring at him.
In the water, you found it easier to move even if it was just the bare minimum of reaching your arm out to Bucky, who happily grabbed your hand and pulled you over to him so your head was now resting on his metal shoulder, legs resting on either side of his hips, the man’s cock now lying between the two of you.
Bucky’s lips brushed over your temple as he held you close, asking, “Are you feeling better now, hot mama?”
Feeling too tired and slightly out of it, you only responded with a simple nod of the head, your mind only really focusing on the member that was twitching against your stomach.
Extending both of your arms under the water, you moved to grasp him, steadily easing up and down his shaft, loving the sound of his breath hitching but Bucky’s hands soon stopped you, “You’ve been through enough tonight Doll, you need to rest, just ignore it, it’ll go away eventually”.
Not being satisfied by your answer, you tightened your grip, frowning as you mumbled, “but I want to, please let me make you cum”.
You heard Bucky swear under his breath as he looked towards Steve, who was watching you with a smile, shrugging his shoulders at his friend's unspoken question.
Bucky contemplated this for a few moments, all the whilst you continued to try and move up and down his length until finally, he released your wrists, head falling back against the bathtub edge, allowing you to wank him off.
As you moved up his thick cock, you squeezed tighter over his tip, applying pressure to the underside before moving back down, and occasionally rolling his balls between your fingers.
The three of you sat and listened to the movements of water around your hands and the small gasps and grunts that Bucky was making.
Before long, you could hear the movement in the water behind you as Steve started to touch himself at the sight before him.
Seeing both men being pleasured in their ways would usually have your cunt pulsing. Still, you had been so thoroughly satisfied by Steve that you weren’t sure you were even capable of another orgasm right now, so you were content with just spending your time making Bucky feel good.
Increasing your pace, you felt his cock becoming harder, pulsing slightly as Bucky’s head shot up, grunting your name wildly and suddenly an idea came to mind as you knew he was close.
Using the last of your energy, you sat up on your knees, hovering your cunt above Bucky’s cock and quickly sinking.
The warm, tight hole was a welcoming feeling as Bucky came almost immediately, hands gripping your hips as he spurted his hot cum into your pussy.
He was breathing heavily as you cuddled back into his chest, his arms now circling your back as you quickly glanced over your shoulder to see Steve cumming into the water as he watched the two of you.
The three of you sat in comfortable silence for a few moments before Bucky leaned down so his lips were next to your ear, “you’re so fucking beautiful, Doll”.
All you could do was smile against his chest, eyes now closed as you were so close to falling asleep, even with his half-limp cock still inside of you but his lips kissing your temple snapped you back to the moment as he continued, “come on, let’s get in the shower, this water isn’t cleaning any of us”.
The boys tenderly cleaned you up, kissing and caressing your body as they moved, and you couldn’t help but feel the love that seeped through your heart, even though the exhaustion of the day's events.
They were always your number one, as you were theirs.