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One day Soobin just woke up and knew he had to change something.
His whole life until now made perfect sense,actually. He was born. He wasted some time in school. Then wasted some more time at university before getting insanely lucky and becoming a TV show host. He is still not sure to this day how the hell did he even get that job (which was not important) but he knew damn well that he was sick of it. Which was important. Very. Crucial.
The job was good, don’t get him wrong. The money was good if being more precise. The fact that his face was a brand of a kind. The amount of occasional pussy he was getting here and there. That very special kind of fear he could see in the eyes of other men who were less successful than him. It was all very sexy and very fun. Until it got insanely boring.
He was working for ten years in that industry now. He knew all the important people he needed to know and even some he didn’t need to. He fucked singers, models and actresses. He went to so many fancy parties it all looks the same for him now. He saw good bad and ugly. He had good, bad and ugly. He had some visible wrinkles around his eyes now and not a single ounce of happiness in his soul.
His mom told him over the phone, how he should probably settle down and marry someone already. The sheer thought of it made his skin crawl. He called his ma in the moment of weakness in secret hope to get some heartwarming words or (dare he to hope) even a piece of surprisingly good advice. Her answer reminded him why he usually doesn’t have moments of weakness. What's the point of them anyway.
So he was just lying in his bed, sheets white and cotton and fresh - trying to wrap his head around how he can make his own life just as crisp as them. But if you really think of it - even that mere act was stupid as hell. All the best things in life happen at random. You don’t need a plan. There exists an infamous demon of plans, running around and making sure every single thing you planned will go wrong. To avoid him you just have to find a trigger. The trigger that will lead to some batshit crazy decisions that will change your life in the end. But there is no need to go and search for it like a fucking hunting dog. You just have to keep your senses sharp and recognize the opportunity when it will come. Yeah, that simple.
That was exactly what Soobin decided to do.
***
The thing is, Soobin would not call himself an opportunity chaser. He was pretty bad at the whole thing, actually. All the things that he had at this point, came to his hands by chance - that’s true, however, it also felt like he did absolutely nothing to get it. To deserve it. To show how much he cared about all of those things. Whenever a lucky card found him he was just standing there, existing, breathing. A pretty interior decor. A boy playing a tree in the school theatre play.
It wasn’t the lack of personality or talent, just the lack of passion. Being passionate required a good energy source. Soobin simply didn’t have it. Maybe he was born without it. It was never a problem for him, but it was for other people, apparently.
‘Are you even there when you fuck me.’ It wasn’t even a question. It sounded like the whole damn statement. A very bold one, but not necessarily wrong.
The statement was made by his girlfriend at the time. Her name was Dana. Half Korean. Wholly gorgeous. An aspiring actress playing girls in the clubs in some B-rated dramas. Looking good while doing it, though.
‘Excuse me, I thought you wanted a date in a fancy restaurant. I provided. I didn’t sign up for some nonsense fight.’ Soobin was good at keeping the straight face throughout the whole conversation. Maybe because it didn’t affect him all that much in the end.
‘I’m serious, Soobin.’ At that point, she put her fork on the table and was recklessly brushing her fingers through her hair. Soobin knew it was serious. That woman wouldn’t mess up her hairdo for nothing. ‘You are always near but never present. I feel like you don’t care about us. Our future.’
‘That’s not true.’
Well, it partly was. He did care about her, obviously. He wasn’t a monster or something. And he wasn’t twenty five anymore, the age when he felt so mighty, having the right to play with any woman’s heart, beat it up till it was bleeding and then completely trash it. You grow out of these things if you are not a bad person. However, Soobin had heard that good people don’t do this kind of stuff like at all.
The part about their future though, it was different. He didn’t care and it was an understatement. He hated to think about it. The future is a weird word. Nobody knows what the hell it means. How to measure it. When it happens. A hell of a scary concept, if you ask Soobin. What was good about the future? Absolutely fucking nothing.
She didn’t fight further - Dana was a very sensible woman. Maybe too sensible for Soobin. She just tried to convince him in a soft voice, how her worries were completely justified and how all of her best friends were already married.
At that exact moment, Soobin knew he would leave her the very next day. Their sex that evening was especially good. The goodbye sex is always something different. Even if only one of you knows that it's the last time.
She was a nice woman - beautiful, talented and knew her worth. Soobin always respected those virtues. But she crossed the line the moment she brought up that marriage talk, even though Soobin never told her she didn’t have a right to do so. He was in the wrong here, really. He should have let the crew know what will happen in the sea while the ship was still on the shore. The only thing is - he is not so sure anyone would agree to get on that ship if he did.
***
It must have been something different in the air that March.
Because for the first time in his life Soobin saw an opportunity and he raced after it.
It was your typical boy’s night out. His friends were handsome and rich because he was. The club was overpriced and painfully pretentious because he and his friends were. Everything was playing just right. He made a good sum last month - thanks to his recent contract with Shiseido. You pretend to wash your face on the camera and the next thing you know - you can buy yourself a decent car. The marvels of life, really.
They were seated at the table, surrounded by random girls in sequent dresses and bottles of Absolute vodka. The air was full of cigarette smoke, just the way Soobin liked it. The music was making him feel old which he liked a little less. An idea of a thirty three years old man trying to pretend like he had the energy to dance to those EDM songs that were currently playing seemed a little too pathetic to him. Hence, he decided to stay exactly where he was - on the nice leather seat, a shot of vodka in his hand and some pretty girl sucking on his neck. Life can be good even when it’s empty.
When he saw tall figures in tight shiny clothes making their way on the stage Soobin was excited. He was quite fond of dancers, actually. When they say that a dancer can fuck you really good, the way no one else can - it's not a lie. Soobin had his own experiences. His own funny little stories. Some quite silly stuff. There was a cute blond girl he fucked one night in Soho, three days into his business trip to America. He didn’t remember her name but she was a dancer in the club, petite and flexible like a cat. She fucked so good he woke up with the boner and an impulsive desire to run away with her. She fell asleep on his chest, her pretty blond hair tickling his skin. He watched her in her sleep while imagining them sleeping like this on some island far away. The girl left for Bali the very next day. Alone, thank god. Soobin never let the offer to runaway slip out of his mouth. It was a stupid little story, but the point stands- dancers are immaculate lovers. It was pretty logical to get excited over the chance of meeting a potential mind-blowing sex partner. So Soobin watched the stage with a sincere interest.
There was better music, finally. And the smooth movements of the six people on the stage. All pretty and lean, just like Soobin expected them to be. What he didn’t expect to see was a single guy among the girls. Soobin spotted him right away. One of Soobin’s friends made a hilarious (in his eyes only) joke about how much that guy resembled a girl. That was simply untrue. A load of bullshit. The sharp line of his jaw. His protruding Adam’s apple. The muscles of his calves. Nice broad shoulders. There was nothing feminine in that dude if you really thought of it. The only thing that one could pinpoint as feminine was his hair. A wolfcut with a length going past his shoulders - nothing Soobin hasn’t seen before. But knowing men it was usually enough to start calling other males names. Soobin wasn’t like that though. It was stupid and he always hated stupidity.
The guy on the stage danced like there’s no tomorrow. Quite frankly - Soobin knew absolutely nothing about dancing. He possessed no skills on his own so he was very hesitant to judge others. But he knew a thing or two about beauty. And what he saw that night on the stage was beautiful. Beautiful to the point where he decided to take his glass from the table and leave his lofty perch to get closer to the stage. For the first few minutes, he tried his best to convince himself that he was looking at every dancer equally. That he was there for the performance appreciation. He was never good at that game - playing pretend. Lying to yourself was even harder than lying to others. So he decided not to do that at all and let his eyes wander in one very particular direction.
There was makeup on that guy and a lot of it. A thick layer of black creating a cat-eye shape. Lots and lots of sparkling glitter all the way from his under-eye down to his cheekbones. Maybe it was smudged that way. Maybe it was an artist decision. Soobin had no idea. He was no stranger to the world of makeup - he was working on TV for god’s sake, but he was a stranger to the idea of playing with it. He both liked and disliked how the stranger’s eyes looked. He liked how the spotlights were making the glitter seem like there was steel melted right on the boy’s cheeks. He disliked how he couldn’t tell what colour or shape the boy’s eyes were. He wasn’t sure he would be able to recognize him if he would ever meet him on the street. It was both intriguing and irritating. Soobin enjoyed the feeling. It's been a while since he felt something like that.
Was he aware of the fact that he was staring at the man the whole time? More than aware. That little thought of awareness was somewhere in the back of his head though, never overcoming the spell he was under when he saw that man dancing.
If he wasn’t into guys all that time doesn't mean he wasn’t into guys at all. Soobin wasn’t a prude. He wasn’t a stranger to the gay sex either. He never tried it, but he was exposed to that topic. Plenty. His best friend claimed to be bisexual while spending more time sitting on the cocks than sitting on chairs. Yeonjun loved to tease him, trying his best to shock Soobin with yet another story about the man he fucked in the hotel. It was all in vain though. Soobin had nothing against casual fucking (duh) and nothing against fucking whatever as long as it was consensual. However he never ever caught himself thinking about another guy in that regard. Up until that night. The moment he saw him up close, something in Soobin’s head clicked. There was his trigger.
The dancers must have finished their program as they were walking off the stage in a hurry. It wasn’t the first time for Soobin to get involved with a dancer after the performance. He knew that there were exactly two places where the beautiful boy could have been. Changing backstage or at the bar waiting for his free drinks. Soobin wasn’t enough of the creep to chase the boy down his changing room. He went to the bar instead.
He spent a few reasonable minutes deciding over what he should drink. He knew exactly what he was going to order, just wanted to waste some time to not look like he was a sad dog waiting for his owner to come. The boy was no one to him and he probably shouldn't have sweated his ass over him so much. He still did though. Understanding things don't mean you are not going to do them.
Soobin hunched over his drink - an embarrassingly bad-tasting negroni (embarrassing for its price) when he felt a light hand touching his shoulder. ‘You didn’t thank me for the meal.’
It couldn’t be it. It was definitely a sign from above. He was right about that beautiful face being his trigger.
‘Excuse me?’ Soobin tried to send off his best smile. The one he taught himself how to do in front of the mirror many years ago.
‘The way you were eating me up with your eyes earlier.’ The boy seated his graceful ass right next to Soobin. His body moved smooth and light like a feather.’But you never thanked me for that.’
Soobin was lost for a second, trying really hard to come up with a witty answer. To no avail. Luckily, the dancer was quick to point at his drink.
‘What are you drinking.’ It didn’t sound like a question. In fact, it wasn’t. ‘I am drinking the same thing.’
After Soobin gestured the bartender to bring another glass for his new company, he knew it was time for him to grab the life by the collar of its shirt. He was in a passenger seat for too long. Fate was kind enough to send him someone who might bring something interesting into his dull life. It was time to make a move.
And God, the man sitting next to him was beautiful. Soobin had his share of beautiful men in his life. Not in his bed though, but still. He worked in entertainment after all - it was fairly hard to surprise him with someone’s beauty. Yet this person did.
The makeup was still on, but sitting this close it wasn’t a problem anymore. Soobin could see him perfectly, as if there wasn’t glitter, dazzling lights of the club and little drops of sweat between them. He could see how the shape of the boy’s eyes got nothing to do with the cats. They were big, and sparkly and looked with honesty. Very nice eyes on a very nice face. The eyes were big but the smile on his face was small, almost comically so. It made a fun contrast, an interesting detail, making you want to stare at him more and more.
Maybe Soobin stared a little bit too much.
The boy was finally served his drink, he grabbed it eagerly in his hand making a fast clinking sound with Soobin’s glass that was still placed on the bar.
‘So are you going to say something or?’
‘Run away with me?’
At this point, Soobin made a lot of accomplishments in his life. But never has he ever made his date nearly die from choking on a drink within the first five minutes of knowing each other. It was nice to add it to his CV.
After cleaning up his throat the boy let out ‘Sure’ in the tone of voice Soobin never heard before. It was soft yet firm. It was neither quiet nor loud. It was gentle and pretty and full of light. Never had he ever met someone so soft-spoken yet so confident. It was only his voice, but Soobin was already intrigued to the point of no return.
He couldn’t wait to find out more. So he decided not to waste any minute further.
‘I am calling a taxi for us.’
***
The infamous taxi ride from the club to your apartment. Your prospective lay right by your side and the air between you filled with an unmistakable taste of awkwardness. Soobin lived through this scenario at least fifty times. This one was different. The stranger was not a stranger anymore. He was Choi Beomgyu. He introduced himself diligently the minute they got into the car. Beomgyu. It was a pretty name, pretty the way it made your lips curl. Soobin was hesitant to say it out loud yet. He wanted to savour it for a little while. It felt right to know the name but he felt like he didn’t have the permission to use it yet.
Turned out that Beomgyu was younger than him. ‘I am about to turn twenty seven in a few days’ he said with a bright smile. Soobin knew he was younger, he could tell just by the look in his eyes. It meant absolutely nothing but it made Soobin even more intrigued somehow.
I wanna take you to New York. The streets are pulsating with life just like you are. I was often scared to be alone in NY. I am slightly scared to be alone with you now. I think you would love it there. We should leave on the first plane tomorrow.
He was so lost in his thoughts he almost missed Beomgu’s little question.
‘So do you want me to pretend.’ he said, absentmindedly tapping his fingers on the window.
‘Huh?’
‘To pretend like I don’t know who you are, Choi Soobin.’ The tapping stopped and the boy turned his whole body to look at Soobin with an earnest expression. ‘I’m not into celebrities, but I know who you are.’
‘If you already know what’s the point in pretending.’ Soobin sent him an innocent dimpled smile, but his head was spinning. He didn’t think of it. He literally forgot. Of course, his name was getting ahead of him. Nothing new.
‘I dunno.’ Beomgyu smiled back. Made Soobin feel a little less worried. ‘Feels kinda wrong. Like I’m going home with you just because you are famous.’
‘But it’s not the case.’
‘But it’s not the case.’ the boy nodded and went silent.
I know it’s not, don’t worry, was left unsaid. Sounded kinda unnatural and movie scene-like. Soobin simply didn’t want to think about it. Even if the beautiful man went for money Soobin simply didn’t care. He was doing it for himself. For the first time in a long time, he was doing something out of sheer passion.
‘So how did the story go,’ Now Beomgyu was lightly tapping his fingers on Soobin’s hand instead of the car window. ‘As a kid were you thinking - I want to be real famous in the future?’
‘I sure wasn’t. And I hate this word.’
‘Which one?’
‘The future.’
‘Oh.’ Beomgyu went silent again, turning his head to look out of the window. His hair was dishevelled in a pretty way. ‘I know an even worse word.’
‘Shoot.’
‘Always.’
Soobin didn’t remember when was the last time he was smiling so wide. ‘Disgusting.’
***
He wasn’t all over Beomgyu as soon as he closed the door behind him. It was weird and new. However, shattering that fixed night-out rule of starting the fucking right on the doormat felt nice somehow. He turned on the lights. Beomgyu was taking his boots off and organizing them neatly on the shoe stand. He didn’t seem to feel awkward. Neither did Soobin.
‘Can I take my makeup off? This shit has been killing my eyes for a while now.’
‘Sure, I will show you the bathroom.’
‘Just tell me where it is.’ Beomgyu giggled a little. ‘ I’m a big boy, no need for a convoy. Mix me a drink while I’m busy instead.’
Soobin did as he was told, trying his best to mix a decent gin tonic (you can’t go wrong with gin tonic, right?) while listening to the splashing of water coming from the bathroom. He was done in no time, leaving the drinks on the kitchen counter to go check on Beomgyu. The big boy didn’t want a convoy but frankly, Soobin didn’t care.
When he entered the bathroom Beomgyu was wiping his face with a towel. The boy must have heard the footsteps as he turned to the door, his face still hidden in the fuzzy fabric. When he finally looked up Soobin could feel his heart skipping a beat.
The man standing in front of him wasn’t more beautiful than he expected him to be. He was exactly as beautiful as Soobin imagined. Usually, people look younger without makeup, but Beomgyu looked older somehow. The look in his eyes was different. It was more serious, more intense. Still bright. The mix that almost made Soobin go insane. He leaned in and kissed the man.
It was the natural impulse of his body - to do that. Beomgyu didn’t meet him halfway. He didn’t expect the kiss, but he was ready to accept it. His lips were soft and pliant. His arms went to hold on Soobin’s shoulders and it felt like they always belonged there. It was a guest bathroom and a rather bad place for a kiss. A tile floor was cold and there was unforgiving blue lighting that made everyone unnecessarily bad looking. The said light was so bright it almost made your eyes hurt. It wasn’t a dim hallway drunk haze type of a kiss. It felt so much more intimate to kiss like that. Soobin felt like he had the right to finally do it.
‘Beomgyu.’
Oh, how he liked the way it sounded.
‘Mhm?’ The pair of the brightest eyes he had ever seen was looking at him from such proximity he felt scared for a second. It was intense, but not the dark type of it. It was as intense as the sun and it was brand new for Soobin to experience that. He only knew the spotlight before.
I wanna take you to Denmark. The sun there shines the way you are - it keeps you warm without making your eyes ache or skin burn. We can stay in a little house in Copenhagen, the walls painted yellow so technicolour it will make your heart warm just by looking at it. There’s a statue of a little mermaid surrounded by water. You kinda look like her now. But I’m not the sea I won’t surround you without asking you first
I really should ask
‘Can I take you?’
‘Depends.’ he tilted his head slightly as if he was in deep thought. ‘But you go ahead and try anyway.’
The idea of carrying that beautiful boy to his bed bride-style was funny but kinda cheap. Soobin decided against it, helping Beomgyu to hold onto him, wrapping his legs around Soobin’s torso. He wasn’t as light as Soobin expected him to be. He kinda liked that.
He carried Beomgyu all the way to the bedroom in silence. He was too immersed in the feeling of Beomgyu’s breath ticking the side of his neck. The breath was warm.
Soobin didn’t throw the boy on the bed. He just sat on it while still holding Beomgyu, trying his best to position the boy comfortably on his lap. Beomgyu was smiling the whole time. A very wide smile with occasional little giggles. It should’ve not been sexy. But it was. Soobin kissed the man’s neck. Lightly at first, but gaining more purpose with every passing second. He could feel Beomgyu slightly pressing onto his chest, laying him on the back, Soobin’s legs still hanging from the edge of the bed and touching the floor. Now Beomgyu was looking down at him, hair framing his face like a crown straight from the fantasy movie. He was still smiling and he was gorgeous. He left a soft kiss on Soobin’s Adam’s apple before leaning back and taking his shirt off in one swift motion.
‘I can’t believe this is real.’ A very honest thought that was pulsating somewhere in the back of Soobin’s mind. But cold fingers touching his neck and making their way down to unbutton his shirt begged to differ. It was real, painfully so. Soobin could physically feel the flow of time when Beomgyu finally helped him out of his shirt and started to undo his own belt. It was taking too long, Soobin had waited enough at this point. Looking at the boy from the distance of a few steps was one thing. He wasn’t an animal, at the end of the day. He could appreciate things without touching them. But having that most glorious being you have ever seen in your hands literally, closer than your own breath - it was a whole different story. Soobin threw Beomgyu off his lap, making the boy bounce on the mattress a little. Beomgyu laughed - prettily, throwing his head back and shaking his hair. Soobin was in front of him, on his knees both physically and metaphorically, finally taking Beomgyu’s jeans off. The man was left in his underwear and Soobin had to stop for a second.
It was not men’s underwear. It definitely wasn’t.
There was a piece of fabric doing a poor job of hiding his half-hard cock. It was sheer on the front. Soobin could see the very tone of his skin even with the panties still on. The rest of the panties were made of black lace. It wasn’t a thong panty but it looked pornographic. Maybe it was the context. Maybe it was the fact that it was very obviously a women’s lingerie on the male body. Maybe it was the fact of how this body looked.
Beomgyu was spread in front of him, tall and honey skinned. His body was lean in the prettiest way possible - you see it only with dancers. Perfection that was created by the years of following the music with your whole being.
It was impossible not to worship that body so Soobin leaned forwards to plant a kiss on the man’s skin, right below his belly button. He could hear Beomgyu breathing out loudly at that. Soobin was in midst of taking the lace panties off with his teeth when it struck him. Made him stop for a while. He had no idea what to do next. It was his first time with the man and not just any man - it was with Beomgyu. It had to be perfect.
Beomgyu must have sensed his hesitant heart as the boy was looking at him with a familiar expression. Eyes wide, head tilted. A smile on his lips, thank God it still was there.
‘What are you doing big boy? So impressed by my beauty it left you speechless?’
It was no point in lying and Soobin wasn’t the fan of it anyway.
‘I never slept with a man before.’
Beomgyu’s face dropped.
Soobin’s heart stopped.
‘You must be kidding me.’ Beomgyu shook his head in disbelief. He lowered it, so his eyes were covered with hair making Soobin even more worried with every passing second. Soon enough the boy’s shoulders started shaking as he burst into laughter throwing his body back on the pillows. ‘Oh my God, Choi Soobin. I swear I thought you knew what you were doing. ’ His words came out muffled as he was covering his face with his hands, still giggling. ‘You were so smug while luring me into your cave.’
‘A cave.’ now it was Soobin’s turn to shake his head. ‘I didn’t buy the best apartment in this area for some pretty boy to call it a cave.’ It felt nice joking around like this. Made Soobin way less nervous. His body was currently situated rather cosily in between Beomgyu’s legs, his fingers playing with the fabric of the panties absentmindedly.
‘Yes, you did. And I was hoping to be fucked by a caveman, but if that’s the deal,’ Suddenly Beomgyu got up from the pillows, sitting up on the bed looking Soobin straight in the eye. ‘This round is on me. Get comfortable and prepare to get the ride of your life.’
‘Oh.’
Soobin find out two things about Choi Beomgyu that night. First - his cock looked even prettier without the lace all around it. And second - that man definitely wasn’t a liar.
He wasn’t bouncing on his cock, he was dancing.
Soobin never knew that slow sex can be that pleasurable, but it was.
His was deep inside Beomgyu, all the way to the base. At first, he tried to take control in his hands and do something. Thrust into the boy with all the eagerness. Show him how much he liked him. He was ready to show him everything. But Beomgyu just guided him to lie down completely with those gentle hands of his, while moving his hips incredibly slow. He wasn’t going up and down, he was rather moving in circles to the music only he could hear. His chest was moving with every breath he took and he looked so gorgeous Soobin wished he could make someone paint Beomgyu on the canvas just like that. Sitting on his cock, one hand resting on Soobin’s chest, hair dishevelled, mouth ajar. Soobin’s very own masterpiece.
We can run away to France. I don’t know if you have already seen it or not, but something is telling me that you haven’t. I will walk you through the streets of Paris. I’m sure you will like it there, the Eiffel Tower at night is shining almost as bright as the glitter under your eyes when you’re dancing. I wanna take you to the Louvre and show you off to every piece of art in there. They have a thing or two to learn from you.
‘You are perfect.’ Soobin was sure he said it inside his head but by the look Beomgyu gave him he realized - he didn’t.
It was a look of vulnerability, the one you don’t share with just anyone. It was a little bit too much to bear. If Soobin kept looking into those eyes there was a danger he would have said something stupid. Something along the lines of ‘I love you' or something worse like ‘please stay with me forever.’ An unimaginable thing to say to the person you just met today. More than imaginable when the person is him. Still, Soobin couldn’t afford to be that stupid just yet, so he had to change their positions.
He put his hand on Beomgyu’s toned stomach softly. The thought of his own cock being buried somewhere inside of that man’s perfect body was driving him crazy. It was a delicious thought, for all that.
‘Can you get on your knees for me, gorgeous?’
After getting Beomgyu on his fours it was much easier not only to concentrate on fucking him into oblivion but also just to breathe in general. Following a sudden burst of energy, Soobin slapped the boy’s ass. Beomgyu let out a surprised moan at that. Soobin played with his butt for a while, stroking it with his fingers and even trying the salt of the skin with his tongue. If it was with any of the girls he was with before Beomgyu, he would already be fucking back into the tight hole, impatient to get his dick wet as soon as possible. Now he felt like he had the whole eternity. He circled the puckered hole and let the one finger in. It was wet and hot inside, even wetter and hotter than it was when he was fingering him - somewhere in between licking kisses and the ride of his life. Soobin was eager to pay the boy back and show him that he too could be an amazing lover. One worth having by your side.
He entered him for the second time that night, feeling fucking invincible. Beomgyu let out a long moan, dropping his head on the pillow and hiding his face in its white fabric.
‘Good?’ Soobin was whispering, all of the sudden.
‘Just for your information, Choi Soobin, your cock is huge,’ Beomgyu’s voice was coming out muffled but Soobin could still hear every word with insane clarity. ‘I’m not sure I’m waking up in one piece tomorrow morning.’
‘Leave tomorrow problems for tomorrow you.’
‘What a genius advice thank you very muuu-’
It was enough talking. Soobin was already fucking into him deep and hard leaving Beomgyu to whimper into the pillows. The arch of Beomgyu’s back was perfect, Soobin had never seen anything quite like that before. That lithe body was made for him, now he was absolutely sure. It was so easy to thrust into him, the way Beomgyu moved his hips to meet Soobin halfway and produced that sinful sound you only hear when you are really fucking. Their bodies kept the rhythm so ideal it was taking everything in Soobin to have some human decency and keep their pace from getting into something animalistic. He wanted their first time to be deep rather than rough. Everything was perfect, except for the fact that he couldn’t hear Beomgyu’s voice. He had to stop for the second time that night.
He stopped all his movements altogether and pulled the man back until he was pretty much pressing into Soobin’s chest. He had him in his lap and it was too tempting not to say
‘My sweet little thing. You were made for my dick. How do you like it, feeling me even deeper like that?’
And it was true. The angle was perfect, letting Soobin’s dick reach all the right angles deep inside Beomgyu’s body. The boy was literally crying, but it was a good type of cry. The one that meant he had completely let himself go just like Soobin wanted. He wanted for Beomgyu to get lost in the pleasure. He wanted to make him forget his own name. Soobin remembered it for him so it was safe.
Beomgyu threw his head on Soobin’s shoulder while the latter kept thrusting into him. Finally, Soobin had the chance to kiss his pretty neck, lick on it, even mark it up with his teeth. They were sharing the same air again, and Soobin noticed that Beomgyu was drooling.
‘So-soobin,’ God, the boy sounded completely fucked out. It only made Soobin more eager to drive him completely insane.
‘Yes, my pretty baby?’ it seemed like it was too hard for Beomgyu to form a coherent sentence. Soobin slowed his thrusts for a bit. He wanted to hear what his angel had to say.
‘Can, can you keep talking to me like that?’
‘Like how’ Soobin pretty much murmured into the man’s neck. It was impossible to let go of it once you got the taste.
‘Saying nice things to me.’
Oh. He could do that.
‘Of course, I can, my pretty angel,’ At this point Soobin was thrusting into him again, but unlike the last time - he kept it fast and shallow. He was peppering the boy's shoulder, neck, ear, jaw - everywhere he could reach - with fast little kisses, as he continued to tell him what he wanted to hear ‘You are the most. Gorgeous. Thing. I’ve ever. Seen. ’ He was saying pretty much everything cause he knew - everything would do. Beomgyu wanted that very specific tone of voice and momentary praise. He wanted to feel worshipped while being impaled on the cock. ‘You should sit on my cock every minute of every day, baby. If it was up to me, I’d please you twenty-four seven.’
‘God, yes, Soobin, just don’t stop.’
‘I would love for the whole world to see us now. I want to show you off. I want to be inside of you the moment before I die.’
Beomgyu was whimpering with pleasure in his lap. He was failing to meet Soobin’s movement’s for a while now. It was obvious that he was close.
‘Can you do something for me, my baby?’ There was a weak nod, so Soobin continued. ‘Lean forward and grab on the headboard, pretty thing. It will help me to fill you up better. Do you want that?’
There was no answer, but Beomgyu did his best to gather all of his strength for that little task, moving as if he was drunk senseless. Soobin never had been prouder of himself.
As soon as Beomgyu’s little fingers clenched onto the headboard Soobin went rough. He knew Beomgyu wouldn’t last long. The boy’s legs were shaking. He sounded as if he was crying. Soobin’s cock was hitting his prostate with every single move.
‘Look at you taking my cock so perfectly. I won’t be able to ever replace you. No one will ever come close.’
Beomgyu just whined at that. Soobin could feel his walls clenching around his dick.
‘Do it for me, baby. Come from my cock without even touching yourself.’
And Beomgyu did. He was shaking severely, letting out a moan so desperate Soobin could feel his own pleasure building just from hearing it. He just realized that he was too immersed in Beomgyu’s pleasure, completely forgetting about his own. Now he was finally able to concentrate on the incredible tightness that was formed around his length. Even Beomgyu’s insides were vibrating slightly from the power of his orgasm. His hands gave up after he climaxed, so now he was lying spread in front of Soobin, free to take and use as he pleased. Soobin wasn’t that mean though. The boy under him was crying from oversensitivity so he made sure to keep the movements of his hips shallow, avoiding all of the gentlest spots. It didn’t take him long to come, finally spilling himself into Beomgyu, feeling perfectly content for the first time in many years.
When he allowed his body to drop beside Beomgyu’s he was fully ready to find him asleep. To his surprise, he was met with bright eyes looking straight at him. There was no expression on Beomgyu’s face. Soobin hoped he just fucked whatever worries that man could have right out of his head. He reached his hand to brush his fingers through Beomgyu’s hair.
‘Was it good?’ Beomgyu's question was so quiet it was almost impossible to hear.
‘Perfect. It was perfect. You will always be perfect.’
‘Always?’
‘Always.’
Right after that Beomgyu closed his eyes. They were red from the tears. Soobin was glad to hear his deep breaths and to see the calm movements of his chest. He fell asleep. Soobin should follow soon. The whole runaway thing can wait till tomorrow morning.
***
To his endless surprise, Soobin wasn’t the first to wake up. His first emotion was panic. There was no Beomgyu next to him. There was no Beomgyu in the bed. And worse than that - there was no Beomgyu in the room.
The worst scenario was born in his head - the boy must have woken up first, put his skin-tight jeans back on and leave for good. Soobin had been there before. He was okay with that before, but that morning was different.
When he heard the soft footsteps approaching his bedroom he learned how to breathe again. He closed his eyes in relief, feeling his bed cracking under the weight of another body. He opened his eyes. No one looks good in the morning, but Beomgyu did.
He was shaking Soobin’s phone in his hand, ‘Your alarm was ringing. I panicked that it will wake you up and ran to another room to turn it off.’ He contemplated on his own words for a second. ‘Kind of a stupid move, not gonna lie. Alarms are made to wake you up. I just wasn’t thinking clearly.’
It hit Soobin that second. He sat alarm on ten o’clock. He had a meeting in two hours. He was ready to fuck that meeting in the ass. He still did. His offering was standing, still.
Beomgyu was back by his side, looking at him with the sweetest expression. His black hair made a nice contrast with the white pillow. Soobin will need to take a picture of it someday. ‘Do you have a place to be?’
‘I don’t.’
‘But you do!’ Beomgyu was weirdly energetic in the morning. Soobin tried to absorb all of his light. It kinda worked. Beomgyu was waving his hand in the air, ‘You are a horrible liar, Choi Soobin. You can go, don’t worry. I can wait for you.’
‘I kinda thought we agreed on running away.’
‘And I meant it when I said it, I swear,’ Soobin knew he did. ‘And if we had done it yesterday I’d have gone with you, no questions. But you obviously have work today. And when I think of it, I have a gig tomorrow.’
Soobin could feel the anxiety building up in the back of his head. Was it Beomgyu’s dodgy way to say that it was a one night stand? It might have been.
‘Also,’ Beomgyu was smiling, but his eyes were unreadable for Soobin. ‘It was foolish of you to show me how comfortable your bed is. I might never want to leave. It's hard to leave a castle for some unknown hut in the woods.’
‘But what about the runaway plan I was so diligently building.’
‘We can do it in the future.’
That was true.
He left Beomgyu to lie around in bed - the boy deserved to take a break after that night. While Soobin was preparing two bowls of cereal and rummaging through his clothes he made a quick decision. He looked for a spare key in one of the drawers. It was burning his hand - what he was about to do was insane. Beomgyu could rob the shit out of his apartment. He could find something to blackmail him. He probably could ruin Soobin’s whole career if he wanted to. Soobin dropped the key on the bed sheets near Beomgyu’s head anyway.
‘Will you still be here when I come back?’
‘I dunno,’ there was that little smile again. ‘But you can take a risk and find out later.’
When Soobin left for work his heart was calm. He already knew the answer.