Archive of Our Own

Jimin watches Jeongguk with a smile on his lips. He seems so happy about the plushie. He’s twenty two, but sometimes he looks so small and young. Of course, he is young. But being an idol comes with a lot of things and one of them is the fact that they all had to grow up pretty fast. And then there’s Jeongguk, who grew up pretty well, who’s grown confident in his own body and has become the person he wanted to be from the very beginning.

He’s himself and so he gets excited over the smallest of things, always eager to please in whatever way he can. Good at almost anything he does, makes everything he touches perfect. Golden. The golden maknae. People sometimes don’t know just how good that title fits him.

And then there’s the fact that he likes very particular things. He’ll sniff everything that smells particularly attractive to him, but mostly everything that has a soft scent. He’ll like anything that feels soft, as well. He’ll touch and hold onto the fabric, no matter which of his hyungs is wearing it (later he’ll steal it just so he can wear it). He likes plushies just for that very reason, the soft fur and also because he likes sleeping holding onto something (which he mostly takes care of by sneaking into his hyung’s beds).

So everyone lets him indulge in it. Jimin has a weak spot for Jeongguk, so he’s always going out of his way to make him smile. Of course, when he won that game at the fair, the first thing he did was get the nicest plushie bunny he spotted just for Jeongguk. The way Jeongguk’s eyes had lit up when he handed it over was enough to make Jimin smile as widely, reaching out to briefly massage his nape in that way he knew Jeongguk liked.

“Thank you, hyung,” he’d said, smiling eagerly and brushing his fingers through the soft fur.

Now that they’re going back home after a long day of recording and having fun, Jeongguk has the plushie on his lap, fingers still brushing through the fur mindlessly, an easy smile on his lips, eyes on the window as he watches the streets go by. He seems somewhat distracted, so Jimin doesn’t say anything and just leans back in his seat and closes his eyes.

He’s tired. They’ve played so much today, gotten onto so many games, laughed like crazy because they’re always like that when they’re all together. On top of that, it’s been a hectic week, recording a lot of things and working on their new songs. They manage it pretty well, considering the fact that they don’t have much time for a lot of things. But it’s hard to keep the tiredness from catching up to their bodies.

He dozes off somewhere along the way, woken up a while later by Jeongguk’s gentle shaking.

“Hyung, we’re already back at the dorm,” he whispers, as if he was actually trying not to wake Jimin up from his sleep.

“Huh, I fell asleep,” he mumbles to himself, rubbing the heel of his hand over his eye and stretching his arms in front of him. He groans at the pull of his muscles, shoulders slumping as he gets off the car behind Jeongguk.

He makes a funny picture, tattooed fingers holding the plushie. Jeongguk sometimes gives a bad boy vibe, the way he holds himself and looks at the camera, the tattoos and the piercings. But then he’ll look so small whenever he’s sitting and grows excited about things. Right now, the tattooed fingers are making a deep contrast with the soft white plushie in his hand.

Jimin laughs without being able to stop himself, hand falling to the low of Jeongguk’s back as they slip into the elevator. It seems that they’re the last ones to arrive, which isn’t too surprising because Jeongguk got distracted with food and Jimin had to wait for him―which he doesn’t hate, but he had a blast teasing Jeongguk about.

“You’re laughing at me,” Jeongguk states, eyebrow cocked and expression wary.

It only makes Jimin smile widely.

“It’s just the way you’re holding the soft plushie so tightly with your tattooed hand,” he explains, shaking his head. “How do you manage to look hot and cute at the same time? I need that information.”

Jeongguk snorts and shakes his head. He does take a peek at his hand, which makes his lips curl up into a smile. He doesn’t change the way in which he’s holding it, instead just leans back against the elevator wall and tilts his head towards Jimin.

“You have that information, hyung,” he replies. “You’re sexy and cute. I’m pretty much sure you don’t need my help.”

Jimin hums. Their playful banter always has him smiling widely, so much that sometimes his cheeks are left aching afterwards. But he likes it. Jeongguk has always felt like a breath of fresh air.

“Anyways,” he begins, stretching his arms over his head just once more, this time grateful for the way his muscles pull because it relaxes him somewhat. “I’m glad you liked the plushie, hyung got it just for you.”

Jeongguk grins, nose scrunching like a bunny. The elevator doors open and they step out, Jeongguk's excited expression still covering his whole face.

“Of course, I did,” he responds, walking close by to Jimin. “You know I love plushies. They’re so soft.”

“Yeah, I know you do,” Jimin replies, reaching up to ruffle his hair. It’s gotten long lately. It seems that he’s growing it out once again. “You have like a million of these on your bed.”

“I don’t,” Jeongguk mumbles, rolling his eyes and moving the plushie. He places it under his arm and takes the key out of his pocket. “I have a few, that’s it.”

Jimin snorts, watching Jeongguk swiftly open their dorm door. “I’m pretty sure I counted like twenty the last time I slept in your room, Jeongguk-ah.”

“Stop teasing me,” Jeongguk replies, gently pushing at Jimin’s shoulder. Jimin laughs. It’s always fun to tease Jeongguk and Jeongguk too has his fair share of teasing every once in a while. As they step into the living room, Jeongguk shows Jimin a smile. “Thank you for the plushie, hyung. Rest well, we have a long day tomorrow.”

Jimin hums and reaches for Jeongguk’s arm. He squeezes reassuringly and smiles back. “You rest too, Jeongguk-ah.”

They part ways because Jeongguk’s room is on the further left of the hallway, meanwhile his room is at the other side. He walks through the living room and spots Hoseok sitting on the couch, phone in his hand.

“We have a busy schedule tomorrow, hyung,” he says, carding his fingers through his hair. “Not sleepy?”

“Actually, no,” Hoseok replies, leaning back and setting his phone aside. “I’m still buzzing with energy.”

“We played too much today,” Jimin states. “I’m beat.”

“I’m sure I’ll get sleepy in a while, don’t worry about me, Jimin-ah,” Hoseok replies, waving his hand in the air. “Go get your beauty sleep.”

Jimin snorts and shakes his head.

“Okay, hyung. Rest well.”

He makes his way to his room and contemplates showering. Normally, he washes up both in the morning and in the night. But he’s sleepy already and he knows that the shower will make him wake up enough that it might make it harder to fall asleep. These days it’s harder to do so, his mind wanders, everything he has to do settles in his brain and has him feeling somewhat anxious. With a sigh, he finally decides to shower quickly and leaves his room to get into one of their shared bathrooms.

By the time he makes it back to his room, his sleepy state has faded away somewhat. He drops down on his bed and grabs his phone, lifting it above his head as he scrolls through twitter. Their fans are currently going crazy over how big Namjoon’s arms have gotten, which is funny but also very accurate. All of them have been teasing Namjoon about it, since he’s gotten so into working out lately.

Twitter entertains him for a while, but it’s not really enough to get him sleepy again. He rolls onto his belly and sighs deeply. He knew he should have skipped the shower but he was feeling dirty and they’ve done so much today. He stands up, decided to find something to do. It’s been a while since he’s slept in Taehyung or Jeongguk’s room. Maybe it’ll help him.

Hoseok is no longer in the living room when Jimin walks past it and the lights have all been turned off. Jimin wanders off to Taehyung’s room, the first one he reaches in the hallway. He opens the door and peeks inside. It shouldn’t be too surprising to find Namjoon in his bed. They’ve been sleeping together a lot lately. Jimin smiles to himself, neither of them have admitted anything, but it’s obvious in the way they look at each other that there’s something going on.

Whatever it is, Jimin will wait patiently for Taehyung to decide he’s ready to talk about it. Taehyung knows that he doesn’t have to tell Jimin for him to know, to sense it. They’re soulmates for a reason.

With a smile on his face, he gently closes the door and pads across the floor towards Jeongguk’s room. It’s not that late, just one in the morning. He’s probably already sleeping, so Jimin will slip into his bed and hold onto him like a koala so he can fall asleep. He gently opens the door, making sure not to make much noise and peeks inside, just in case maybe Hoseok has already claimed his spot there. They tend to sleep in each other’s beds a lot, probably because they’ve grown together all these years.

But what he sees isn’t Hoseok cuddling up to Jeongguk. What he sees is far from that. Jeongguk isn’t sleeping like he thought. As a matter of fact, he’s wide awake and he’s so lost in what he’s doing that he probably has no idea that Jimin is standing there, eyes wide and inevitably plastered on him because he’s so surprised about what he’s seeing. They’ve walked in on each other jerking off before, that tends to happen when you live with six other guys in the same dorm for so many years. Yet this is different. For some reason, it just feels that way.

Jimin steps back and closes the door, fingers shaking even though he’s trying hard not to make any noise. The second the door clicks shut, he leans back against the wall. Jeongguk didn’t lock the door. And Jimin just walked in on him―oh god. Jimin can’t get that image out of his head. He doesn’t want to stop and consider just why he keeps on seeing it. He’s seen Jeongguk naked before. But he’s never seen him like that.

And what he heard. Fuck. Jimin is quick to pad his way towards his room, scared that he’ll bump into any of the guys on his way. Thankfully, it doesn’t happen and he locks his bedroom door the second he slips into it. He leans back against it, blink forward, unmoving, still surprised.

He just can’t stop thinking about it. It’s so vividly burned into his brain.

Jeongguk was on his bed, naked from the waist down. He was biting down on his shirt to suppress his moans but Jimin can still hear them, soft whines and huffs ringing in his ears. The arch of his back and his hands fisting the sheets. His skin, covered in sweat, the beautiful patterns of his tattoos circling around his right thigh, strong muscle clenching every time he thrust forward into―the plushie.

He can’t believe he just walked in on Jeongguk humping the bunny plushie. There’s so much swirling around in his brain, he can’t seem to settle down. All he can think about is Jeongguk. He’s not one to judge and he doesn’t particularly care about the fact that he was humping a plushie. It’s just the fact that he can’t get it out of his head. Jeongguk like that, Jeongguk so desperate, giving himself pleasure.

Jimin moves his hand to cover his mouth and exhales a shaky breath. How will he ever be able to face Jeongguk if that image is everything he’ll be able to see? He can’t take it out of his head, just how...hot Jeongguk had looked like that. He has to forget about it. Jeongguk clearly didn’t hear him nor see him. Jimin will pretend nothing happened, he’ll move on with his life and never think about it again.

Or―at least he’ll try not to think about it ever again.

With a groan, he slides his feet across the floor until he reaches his bed. He drops down heavily, mortified with facing Jeongguk but convincing himself that he’s fine and he just needs to pretend.

It ends up taking him far too long to fall asleep, the image plastered in his mind for hours, until his body finally gives in to exhaustion and he dozes off for the rest of the night.

↢↣

Jimin is dealing terribly with this. First of all, he can’t stop thinking about it. Second of all, he can’t stop looking at Jeongguk lately and whenever that happens, the image just comes back to his head again. And lastly, he’s avoiding Jeongguk. He’s trying to not make it obvious, but even then, he’s failing miserably.

He’s too tense, his muscles keep taking the hit and he’s exhausted because he’s having more trouble sleeping. Because he knows Jeongguk has noticed, of course he would, since they spend so much time together that having Jimin run off must be something he notices. And it’s terrifying to think that Jeongguk also knows why Jimin is acting this way. How is he supposed to face him when all he can think about is that?

He’s completely at loss with what he should do. It’s not like he can just go to Jeongguk and say, hey I saw you humping the plushie I gave you, that’s why I’m so awkward around you lately. Yeah, no. Jimin is sure that if he were to say something, Jeongguk would be so embarrassed he’d probably not talk to him in days. But here is Jimin, avoiding him despite promising himself that he would pretend he hadn’t seen anything.

“Jimin-ah,” Taehyung’s voice pulls him out of his thoughts and his gaze moves to him, sitting next to him on the floor. Jimin didn’t even hear him come up to his side.

“Hey,” he replies, leaning back on his hands and tilting his head back. They’ve been practicing the new choreographies all morning and half of the afternoon, but they’ve thankfully already finished and tomorrow they have a day off.

“So, why are you and Jeongguk fighting?” He asks casually. Jimin’s head snaps towards him.

“We’re not fighting,” he answers.

“You haven’t spent a single day with Jeongguk in like a week,” Taehyung states, as if that’s the only explanation that has to be given. “You and Jeongguk are literally always tied to the hip. And then there’s the fact that Jeongguk has this pinched expression, like he’s worrying about something, but he’s also trying to pretend he’s not. I put two and two together. Do I have to remind you that I’m your soulmate?” Taehyung asks, crossing his legs and folding his arms over his chest. “You also look like you’re not sleeping well.”

Only sometimes, Jimin wishes he and Taehyung didn’t understand each other so well. In situations like this one, when he’s not anywhere near ready to talk about it. He knows Taehyung won’t pressure him about it, but Jimin was trying very hard to keep it out of his mind and now he has it in his mind again.

“We aren’t,” he promises. “I just have been very focused on the choreography, you know how I get,” he explains.

“I know you’re not telling me something,” Taehyung points out.

Jimin rolls his eyes but looks away, knowing that Taehyung will see it all over his face if he doesn’t.

“I’m not,” he mumbles, nibbling on his lower lip.

The door opens and a head pops in, looking around the room. Jimin’s eyes meet Jeongguk’s and that familiar warmth spreads in his belly, something he’s been trying to fight over the past week.

“Oh, hey hyungs,” Jeonguk mumbles. “I’m gonna just um, get going. There’s still a car left, but I wanted to make sure nobody else wanted to leave.”

“Go ahead, Jeongguk-ah,” Jimin replies, showing him a small smile. “We’ll see you at home.”

Jeongguk pauses, seeming hesitant. But he finally nods and shows them both a smile before leaving and closing the door. Jimin is...nervous. It’s been a while since he’s felt this way. Sometimes for presentations, but it’s normally easy to ignore. This. This is different. For some reason, he can’t control it.

“Okay, there’s definitely something going on,” Taehyung protests.

“It’s fine, Tae,” Jimin reassures, turning to look at him again. “Really, I’m just...tired. It’s been a hard week and I haven’t had much time in general, that’s the only thing that’s going on.”

Taehyung squints his gaze at him, seeming unsure, still. He tilts his head to the side.

“Why are you being so awkward about it?” He asks, cocking an eyebrow. He stares at Jimin for a long moment, and then his eyes suddenly widen comically. “Did you guys fuck?”

Jimin’s skin heats up at his words. They didn’t, but god, Jimin has this image of Jeongguk in his head that he can’t push away no matter how hard he tries. He doesn’t even know what it’s about. He’s always known Jeongguk is hot, he’s always thought that he’s attractive. But...it’s strange to feel this way about how Jeongguk looks when he’s...lost in pleasure. Jimin hasn’t ever felt anything like this and that’s what’s fucking with his head.

“We didn’t, what the fuck?” He asks back, swatting at his shoulder and looking around. The few staff members that are left are busy talking and organizing whatever is left to organize.

It doesn’t seem that they’ve heard, so Jimin turns back to focus on Taehyung.

“It’s fine,” Taehyung says, nodding to himself. “Whatever it is, just know that you can tell me whenever you want to,” he reassures, reaching out to squeeze gently at Jimin’s shoulder. “Should we go? Jin hyung said we should all get drunk tonight, since we have a free day tomorrow.”

God, Jimin hasn’t gotten drunk in a very long time. Maybe he needs to let loose a little bit. He’s too tense and stressed out lately, struggling to focus and to not think about Jeongguk.

“I think I need that, actually,” he mumbles, standing up and stretching his arms over his head. “Let's go.”

“Jimin-ah,” Taehyung stops him, reaching out once more. Jimin isn’t surprised to be pulled in for a hug. He goes happily, wrapping his arms around Taehyung and sighing deeply. It’s comforting. Taehyung is always there for whatever Jimin needs. “I’m being serious. If it’s something that’s keeping you up at night and you’re stressed out about it, you can tell me. Whatever it is, I’ll always be there for you. Remember?”

Jimin squeezes Taehyung tighter, grateful that he has such a perfect best friend.

“I know that, Tae,” he reassures. “And I’m fine, I promise. Don’t worry too much about me.”

Taehyung leans back and lets go, gesturing for Jimin to follow.

“As if I could ever not worry about you,” he mutters.

“Well, if you’re so eager to talk about something, why don’t we talk about the fact that you and Namjoon hyung are still not officially together?”

Taehyung swats his shoulder quickly and does the same thing Jimin did, looking around as if worried someone has heard.

“There’s nothing going on between us,” he mumbles, shoving his hands in his pockets. “He’s just helping me out with some songs.”

Jimin snorts.

“Yeah, sure.”

Taehyung grumbles about it for a second before finally speaking up.

“I don’t think it’s like that,” he says, so softly that Jimin almost misses it. As they’re walking into the underground parking lot, he turns his head towards him. “So, you like him?” He asks. “How can it not be like that when he’s literally been sleeping in your bed for I don’t know how long and you know Namjoon hyung doesn’t normally sneak into people’s beds.”

Taehyung smiles, sighing deeply. “How could I not like him?” He asks, although he doesn’t seem to be expecting an answer from Jimin. “I know that, but we haven’t talked about it or anything. So, I’m just going with it for now, testing the waters, I guess.”

They reach the car and get in, greeting the driver as they settle down in their seats.

“You know he would never hurt you, right?” He asks, making sure to lower his voice enough that the conversation can only be heard by them. “I’m sure you have nothing to be afraid of. So just...talk to him whenever you’re ready. I’m sure it’ll be fine,”

“I will,” Taehyung says, showing Jimin a smile. “Thank you, Jimin-ah.”

He reaches out for Jimin’s hand and their fingers intertwine together in that calming way they always do.

“Thank you, Taehyung-ah,” he replies.

Because even if he hasn’t talked about it, he feels a bit calmer now. They don’t let go of each other’s hand until they reach the dorm and get out of the car. It’s not that much of a long drive, but by the time they enter their home, everybody is already sitting in the living room, beers being passed around.

Jimin’s eyes instinctively move to Jeongguk because he just can’t help it. He’s always been like this about him, but these days it’s even harder to look away. He meets Jeongguk’s eyes immediately and when the younger one smiles tentatively, Jimin can’t help smiling back. He looks away just a moment later, accepting the beer that Hoseok hands him as he’s struggling to take his shoes off.

Everybody is buzzing with energy because they’ve had very busy weeks lately and this is the first time they get to fully unwind without having to worry about tomorrow. Jimin lets go as well, drinking up two beers in just an hour or so. Because everybody else started earlier, they’re tipsier than him, but he doesn’t mind. He’s having fun. They always have fun around each other, even if they’re filming, even if they’re in schedule with their different activities. That happens when you build a life around people, they become important to you in a way that makes everything fun and exciting when you’re with them.

Jimin is always grateful they found each other, that everything happened a certain way that they ended up in a group together, debuting and becoming the big band they are right now. They’ve been lucky, they’ve connected with great people around the world and that’s all led to this, to them.

“Hyung,” Jeongguk’s voice startles him.

He’s standing beside him, beer in hand and expression rather...wary. God, Jimin feels like such an idiot. He absolutely hates the fact that he’s made Jeongguk feel this way, it’s all so evident in his expression. He’s possibly drunk right now or very much tipsy, so he doesn’t seem capable of pretending that everything is fine. Jimin is worried too, even though he’s very much conscious, he’s tipsy enough that he doesn’t feel like...running.

“Hey, Jeongguk-ah,” he greets him, showing him a reassuring smile. “Having fun?” He asks, tilting his head to the side.

“I always have fun with all of you,” Jeongguk points out. “It’s been a while since we’ve had a rest, so I’m looking forward to it.”

Jimin hums.

“Ah, me too,” he replies. “I’m definitely going to sleep in.”

Jeongguk smiles, taking a long sip from his can.

“I think everybody is going to do that, hyung,” he says.

Jimin realizes that Jeongguk is yet to sit down. He’s shuffling on his feet nervously, as if contemplating what to do. His eyebrows furrow and he clears his throat. Hoseok laughs loudly at something Namjoon tells him, startling both him and Jeongguk, but they don’t look back, still focused on each other.

“Hyung, is there…” Jeongguk begins, trailing off and sighing deeply. “Is there something going on? I feel like you’ve been a little bit distant lately.”

Oh, yes. A lot of things are going on. For starters, all Jimin can think about is Jeongguk humping that freaking bunny plushie and that image has been following him around for what feels like a lifetime, even though it’s only been a week.

“I’ve just been very busy,” he says, probably a bit too quickly. “You know, I really want to work on the songs I want to put out, so I’m trying to work on that as much as possible these days.” Jeongguk shifts on his feet again, looking down at his can. “Jeongguk-ah,” Jimin calls out. Jeongguk’s sweet and wide eyes meet his. “You can sit down.”

Jeongguk is quick to do that. The couch is big enough for them both to be sitting there without having to necessarily touch. But Jeongguk takes a seat right next to Jimin, thigh pressing to his. Even though it makes his skin heat up in a rather intense way, Jimin reaches out with his hand and pats Jeongguk’s thigh softly.

“Are you sure, hyung?” Jeongguk asks, still hesitant.

“I am,” Jimin promises.

He needs to stop running, that much he’s known even since the very beginning. It’s just so hard because Jeongguk has always been...Jeongguk. His best friend, the person he’s relied on so much as they’ve grown up. Jeongguk who he never thought he’d see in this way. And it’s frustrating because god, Jimin has walked in on him jerking off several times before, the same way they all have with each other on awkward occasions. But for some reason...this is different.

Just the way in which Jeongguk’s hips moved, for that brief moment Jimin was paralyzed in place, the glistening sweat covering his body, the soft sounds he was making and how desperately he was fisting the sheets...it all has become things he can’t help but remember whenever he spots Jeongguk.

“Okay,” Jeongguk whispers, finally seeming reassured enough.

And Jimin is glad. He relaxes in his spot, squeezing Jeongguk’s thigh and letting go. He takes a sip from his can and turns his face towards him again.

“What about you, hm?” He asks. “What have you been up to? How’s your mixtape going?”

Jeongguk scrunches his nose. He seems much calmer now, less tense, less unsure, less hesitant. He takes a final sip from his can, shaking it softly as if to see if there’s anything left. He sets it down on the floor and tangles his fingers together, letting them drop in between his spread legs. Jimin is so fucking conscious of where they’re touching, Jeongguk’s thigh pressed so perfectly to his own, his shoulder also glued to his.

“I guess it’s going good,” he replies. “I’ve recorded a few songs, but there are a lot of things I still have to fix. There’s also one of them I’m thinking about not putting in there.”

“Why’s that?” Jimin inquires, also finishing up his beer and placing the can down on the floor. He leans his head back and tilts it to the side so he can fully focus on Jeongguk.

“It just doesn’t feel like it should go there,” Jeongguk explains. “Can I show you?” He asks, then. “Whenever you’re less busy...maybe you can invade my bed. It’s been a while.”

The thought of being in Jeongguk’s bed makes Jimin’s heart jump in his chest. He clears his throat and pretends the suggestion didn’t just make his skin warm up, showing Jeongguk a smile.

“Of course. It really has been.”

“Jeongguk-ah,” Yoongi’s voice makes Jeongguk turn his head towards the other side of the room. “Can you help me out with this for a little bit?”

Jimin smiles reassuringly when Jeongguk turns to look at him with an apologetic expression.

“Go on,” he says, laughing when Jeongguk seems hesitant to leave.

“I’ll be back in a bit,” Jeongguk says, still hesitating as he slowly starts to stand up.

“Jeongguk,” Jimin calls out. When Jeongguk turns around to face him, Jimin smiles. “I’ll be here when you come back, stop acting like I’ll disappear or something. I promise everything is fine.”

At that, Jeongguk smiles widely, nose scrunching like a bunny. Jimin smiles back the same way, watching Jeongguk quickly go to where Yoongi was calling him. Despite the fact that all of them have been drinking, Yoongi has always been a workaholic one and it’s no surprise he’s working right now. His laptop is open on the kitchen counter and he’s telling Jeongguk something as they’re both listening to whatever he’s playing through his earphones.

Despite having said it would only be for a little bit, minutes start to go by and Jimin realizes that he’s been staring at Jeongguk throughout it all without pulling his eyes away. He shifts and looks away, nibbling on the inside of his cheek in favor of distracting himself. His eyes trail around the room. Hoseok is talking with Seokjin now, both of them being very loud as they laugh about whatever it is they’re saying.

Once more, he turns to watch Jeongguk. It’s like he can’t keep his eyes away. He won’t be drinking anything more because he already feels pleasantly tipsy, enough that his body is buzzing with the alcohol he’s had. And also because if he does...he’s scared he’ll end up saying something to Jeongguk. God forbid that happens, he’d probably never forgive himself. Jeongguk and Yoongi are still listening to whatever Yoongi is playing on his earphones, but they both have a new can of beer in their hands and they seem pretty relaxed.

Seokjin and Hoseok pull him into their conversation for a moment and Jimin gets distracted once more. They’re talking about the choreography they’ve been practicing and making fun of each other because of all the times they’ve all messed up. It’s a hard one this time around and they’re all struggling to keep up. So they make a lot of mistakes, which is natural at the beginning and they always have fun remembering those moments at moments like these.

He’s not sure of how long goes by. It feels like a whole hour when Jimin looks around again, his eyes finding Taehyung. He spots him talking with Namjoon further away in the living room. Taehyung is leaning back against the wall, his head tilted to the side and his expression...Jimin smiles to himself. It’s no surprise when Namjoon leans towards Taehyung, saying something into his ear. Namjoon starts walking and Taehyung follows him out of the living room. Nobody else seems to notice, but Jimin sees how Namjoon reaches for Taehyung’s hand and shows him a smile as they disappear into Namjoon’s room. Jimin smiles to himself, but ends up getting distracted by a body falling beside him.

It’s not surprising to find Jeongguk there, seeming somewhat sleepy but maybe it’s because he’s been drinking a bit more since the last time they talked. He tilts his head back and turns it towards Jimin, showing him a tired smile.

“I took too long,” he mumbles, eyes fluttering shut.

Jimin watches him for a moment too long, shaking his head and smiling when Jeongguk seems to start drifting off. It’s pretty late already and even though tomorrow is a free day for all of them, they should go to bed soon.

“Come on, Jeongguk-ah,” Jimin voices out, patting Jeongguk’s thigh and gesturing for him to stand up when his eyes flutter open. “We should get you to bed soon, you seem exhausted.”

“I’m not,” Jeongguk stubbornly mutters, but when Jimin reaches for his hand and tugs, he goes with a groan. “I’m just a little bit drunk,” he mumbles, as Jimin pulls him down the hallway, towards Jeongguk’s bedroom.

Noted, Jimin hasn’t been in that room ever since that day he walked in on Jeongguk, but he tells himself he’ll be a good hyung this time around and take care of Jeongguk the way he’s supposed to, instead of running away. So he pushes the thought out of his head and focuses on guiding Jeongguk into his room and towards his bed.

“I hope tonight was fun for you,” Jimin states, as he helps Jeongguk take a seat on the edge of bed. “It’s a good thing we have tomorrow off, you’ll be able to sleep in.”

“It was,” Jeongguk replies, smiling lazily.

Jimin rolls his eyes, but a smile takes over his lips as well. “Do you wanna change into pajamas or―” he’s in the middle of saying when Jeongguk suddenly reaches out and circles Jimin’s wrist with his hand.

“Hyung,” he mumbles, holding onto him tightly, as if he’s scared of letting go. Jimin stares down at him even though Jeongguk’s head is hanging low.

“Yeah, Jeongguk-ah?” He asks gently, reaching out with his free hand and slowly letting his fingers card through Jeongguk’s soft hair.

He’s not sure of why the atmosphere suddenly changed, but he figures it shouldn’t be too surprising considering the fact that Jeongguk is drunk.

“Hyung is mad at me,” he whispers, leaning closer, face pressing to Jimin’s belly. He’s so taken aback that he doesn’t move for a long moment, can’t even figure out what to say in response to Jeongguk’s words. They talked about this earlier, Jimin reassured him that everything was fine, but here he is again, worried. “What did I do, hyung? How can I fix it?”

Jimin closes his eyes tightly, eyebrows furrowing. He should have known that Jeongguk would feel this way. He always puts the blame on himself even when he shouldn’t, when he doesn’t have to. Jimin feels so terrible about this.

“You didn’t,” he quickly reassures. “You didn’t do anything wrong, Jeongguk-ah,” he promises. “We already talked about this. Everything is okay.”

It’s not his fault. It’s not his fault that Jimin hasn’t been able to take the image out of his brain. Jeongguk looking so beautiful while humping his pillow. God, he’s been sinking in guilt all this time and even though he keeps telling himself that he wants to forget about it, he knows deep down he doesn’t think he’ll ever be able to forget. And god, now is definitely not the time to be thinking about that. No.

“Then why is hyung avoiding me?” Jeongguk asks, pressing his face deeper into Jimin’s belly, rubbing up and down as if to comfort himself.

“I’m not,” he breathes out. “Hyung has just been very busy.” Jeongguk looks up, seeming exhausted, but also sad. Jimin hates it. Maybe it’s because he’s tipsy and because Jeongguk means so much to him. He cups his cheek and shakes his head, showing him a smile. “I could never be mad at you, Jeongguk-ah,” he promises. “It’s just that hyung…” he trails off, nervous but also already knowing that this is something he should have done earlier, before letting it get out of his hands. “Hyung will talk to you about it tomorrow, yeah? When we’re both completely sober, okay?”

Jeongguk seems unsure. He pouts, lip jutting out cutely. Jimin is hopelessly endeared, but  he’s also nervous because now there’s really no coming back and he doesn’t even know how he’ll ever talk about this with Jeongguk when it’s something he wanted to keep buried for the rest of his life. Yet it’s starting to affect both of them, pretty clearly, and that’s the last thing he could ever want.

“But you’re not mad at me?” Jeongguk asks softly, fingers tightening around Jimin’s wrist.

“I’m not,” he reassures. “Really, Jeongguk-ah. There’s just something that we need to talk about.”

Jeongguk’s expression relaxes and his lips pull up into a lazy smile again. He nods almost too eagerly.

“I’m glad,” he mumbles, dropping his forehead to Jimin’s belly once more. “I’ve been so worried.”

Jimin swallows down the lump in his throat and gently scratches at Jeongguk’s scalp.

“Don’t ever be worried,” he whispers back. “I’m sorry I made you feel that way, Jeongguk.”

Jeongguk doesn’t reply and it doesn’t take long for Jimin to realize that it’s probably because he’s sleepy. So he helps him lay down under the covers, choosing to let Jeongguk sleep in the same clothes since he’s already wearing loose pants and an oversized shirt. Just as he’s straightening up to leave, Jeongguk opens his eyes and searches for him.

“Don’t leave, hyung,” Jeongguk whispers, a pleading edge to his voice. His eyes flutter closed, as if he’s too tired to keep them open. “Stay with me.”

Jimin hesitates. He didn’t plan on this when he decided to help Jeongguk to his room, he didn’t plan to be anywhere near this bed any time soon, actually. But he’s here and sleeping next to Jeongguk has always been something very calming for him, soothing in a way he often needs.

He tells himself that it’s because he’s been drinking but he knows very well that he’s nowhere near drunk, he’s not even tipsy anymore. He’s fully conscious about what he’s doing. It doesn’t matter. He slips under the covers as well, laying down facing the ceiling, unmoving so as to not wake Jeongguk up, since he’s already starting to fall asleep.

He could have just left and Jeongguk probably wouldn’t have noticed. But he didn’t want to. He’s missed Jeongguk. Even though he knows tomorrow they’ll be talking and he’s nervous about it, sleep somehow finds him easily and soon enough he’s falling asleep with Jeongguk’s warmth close to his body.

↢↣

Jimin wakes up to Jeongguk pressed tightly to his back. It’s nothing new. Both of them are cuddly whenever they sleep in the same bed. But this time around, it makes Jimin’s heart race. He’s far too conscious about Jeongguk’s chest pressed to his back and his hips pressed to his ass and his knees behind Jimin’s and his arm secured around his waist, fingers fisting Jimin’s shirt as if his life depends on it.

His breath tickles Jimin’s neck every time Jeongguk breathes and he’s pretty much sure that his lips are brushing against his skin, if he’s not just imagining things because his brain has been messing with him lately. He keeps his eyes closed for a moment, just letting himself enjoy it because god knows that he likes this, just having Jeongguk holding onto him so warmly.

It’s funny how he’s woken up like this several times before, but he never felt this way about it. He can’t deny that he’s been feeling differently about Jeongguk lately. It’s like seeing him that night has made it so hard not to...pay more attention. About the small things, those things that he’s always seen but never paused to think about. How gentle he is with everything in general, but also how gentle he is with Jimin.

He’ll touch him softly, fingers brushing against his skin whenever he’s talking, fingertips digging into his skin whenever he massages his neck―which is very frequently. How he’ll place his hand on the small of Jimin’s back and lean in to tell him something, whisper it into his ear.

They haven’t been spending that much time together lately, which is Jimin’s fault, of course. But even then, Jeongguk always found the moment to do any of those things.

And every time, Jimin’s heart has just gone crazy.

He’s tried not thinking about it, but it’s hard not to when Jeongguk is everywhere. Jimin just can’t stop watching. Jimin has always known that Jeongguk is attractive, handsome, tall and beautiful...very much his type. But he never thought he’d end up feeling this way, attracted to him in a way that tugs at his heartstrings and makes him want to just―

Jimin tenses up when Jeongguk stirs in his sleep, arm tightening around his waist. He groans and grunts as he starts to wake up, nose nuzzling into Jimin’s skin. Things like that...they make Jimin’s body warm up pleasantly.

It takes Jeongguk a couple of seconds to realize that he’s holding on to Jimin. He freezes for a second and then relaxes, not pulling his arm away but yes relaxing enough that he’s not holding onto Jimin for dear life.

“Good morning, hyung,” he greets him, his breath sliding down Jimin’s neck.

“Good morning, Jeongguk'-ah,” he whispers back.

Jimin does his best to stay calm and slowly detaches himself from Jeongguk, groaning as he stretches his arms above his head and moves into a sitting position, legs crossed. He turns his body towards Jeongguk, but the younger one only rolls onto his back, eyes still closed. Jimin watches him for a couple of seconds, mesmerized for some strange reason.

He’s seen Jeongguk wake up several times before but today he looks so…cozy. His hair is a long mess of curls and hs whole face it the slightest bit swollen. His lips are parted, pink and pretty. Jimin reaches out before he can stop himself, fingertips brushing over Jeongguk’s forehead. He pushes the hair strands away, but freezes when Jeongguk’s eyes flutter open and meet his.

Jeongguk stares at Jimin for a second too long, enough that it makes his heart beat faster, enough that it has him shifting nervously in spot, pulling his eyes away. Jeongguk just has a way of looking at him. He’s never one to look away whenever they’re teasing each other or staring at each other, even if there’s a camera around. Maybe it’s because they’re alone and Jimin knows what they’re going to be talking about.

"Um,” Jeongguk starts, clearing his throat, voice husky with sleep. He sits up. Jimin watches him go through the realization of the whole situation. He looks under the covers, as if a part of him was expecting to find that he was naked. Jimin feels his lips tug at that because Jeongguk doesn’t forget things when he gets drunk, so it’s funny that he’d even pause to consider it.

After that he looks ahead, eyebrows furrowed and his expression slowly shifts into one of realization. His gaze meets Jimin’s.

“We said we’d talk today,” Jimin murmurs, reaching up to card his fingers through his hair and comb it back, strands getting into his eyes as he attempts to fix it as best as he can.

Jeongguk’s eyes widen.

“Does that mean you are mad at me?” He asks.

Jimin shakes his head quickly, reaching out to place his hands on Jeongguk’s biceps. “I’m not mad, Jeongguk-ah,” he reassures. “But there is something we have to talk about,” he goes on.

Jeongguk’s eyebrows furrow this time around.

“The reason why you’ve been avoiding me?” He asks softly, pulling his legs to his chest and wrapping his arms around them. He looks at Jimin briefly before moving his gaze away. He seems nervous all of a sudden. Jimin feels ten times more nervous, but he pushes it away because he wants to fix this situation that got out of hand because of him.

“The reason I’ve been…” he trails off, playing with the sheets with his fingers. “Weird,” he finishes. “The reason I’ve been acting like this.”

Jeongguk let his cheek fall to his knees, looking at Jimin, focusing his whole attention on him. It only makes Jimin’s heart race even more, but he tells himself that it’ll be okay.

“What happened, hyung?” Jeongguk asks, his voice barely above a whisper.

Jimin swallows down the lump in his throat and takes a deep breath.

“It’s um,” he begins, reaching up to awkwardly scratch at the back of his neck. “Remember the night of the fair?” He asks gently. He wants to make sure he speaks softly and reassuringly so as to not make Jeongguk feel bad or uncomfortable. He knows he’ll be embarrassed, but that’s something just inevitable. Jimin is embarrassed too, especially because he hasn’t been able to stop thinking about it.

“Yeah…” Jeongguk trails off, eyebrows furrowing again in confusion.

“That night, I wanted to cuddle,” he starts to explain. “I went looking for Tae but he was sort of busy,” he mumbles. He knows he’s going a bit in circles, but he’s hoping Jeongguk will understand where this is going before he actually says it, so he’s somewhat ready. And, sure enough, Jeongguk’s eyes get a little bit lost after Jimin says that, as if thinking, wondering where this is going. “So…I went looking for you,” he whispers.

It’s then that Jeongguk’s eyes widen comically and maybe in any other situation, Jimin would have teased him and laughed because that’s what they normally do, that’s how they are. Yet this feels so different. Jimin can’t tease him because god knows just the thought of the situation is enough to have his skin heating up.

“Oh my god,” Jeongguk whispers and the expression taking over his face makes Jimin sense his panic.

“The door wasn’t locked,” he blurts out, unable to stop himself now that he’s begun. “I didn’t knock, which I should’ve, but I guess I just didn’t think―” he stops himself, noticing that Jeongguk’s face is bright red now and Jimin feels like he’s only making it worse. “I saw you,” he breathes out and it feels like a whole weight has been lifted from his shoulders the second he does.

Jeongguk’s eyes have been wide throughout this whole moment, even though Jimin feels like he wasn’t really making any sense as he was trying to explain the situation. It’s clear that he doesn’t need to further explain for Jeongguk to know what he’s talking about. Jimin’s heart is still racing even though he’s much calmer now that he’s said it. So he takes advantage of that and keeps going, especially because it seems like Jeongguk is starting to panic even more.

“It’s fine,” he reassures. “It’s not like I haven’t walked in on you jerking off before,” he mumbles. “I didn’t want to make you feel embarrassed, that’s why I didn’t say anything at first. But then because I was keeping it from you, it felt kinda wrong, since it was clear you didn’t know I walked in on you doing…anyway,” he mutters, clearing his throat. “I’m sorry I just started avoiding you, I didn’t know how to tell you without making you feel embarrassed and I―”

“Oh my god,” Jeongguk interrupts, covering his face with his hands. “Hyung, I’m so sorry,” he mumbles. He lifts his face from his hands immediately, looking at Jimin with a bit of desperation in his expression. “I promise I don’t normally―I mean, the plushie, I―” he tries to explain, but as he does, his face just continues to grow red and he stumbles with his words, seemingly nervous.

“Jeongguk-ah, I would never judge you,” he quickly interrupts, not wanting Jeongguk to grow even more nervous because he can’t properly express himself because of his nervousness. “You don’t have to explain to me, it’s not―”

“No but,” Jeongguk interrupts, shaking his head. He’s stretched his legs in front of himself and he’s fisting the sheets with his fingers. “It’s the plushie you gave me, I don’t want you to think―it’s just hard,” he blurts out. “You know, right, hyung? It’s hard to have time for that and it had been so long and I was horny, but I don’t usually use my plushies,” he explains. “I just―”

“Jeongguk,” Jimin states, reaching out to hold his biceps again. Jeongguk flinches, but Jimin doesn’t mind it. He understands why Jeongguk is jumpy, why he’s panicking. He shows him a reassuring smile. “This is what I didn’t want. I know I should have told you sooner, I dealt poorly with it. That’s hyung’s fault, okay?” He reassures. “We can just pretend it didn’t happen. You don’t have to feel bad about it, it’s okay. I just want us to go back to how it was, I hate that you felt like I was mad, so I thought it was time to explain and fix the whole situation.”

The younger one doesn’t seem convinced. He nibbles on his lower lip nervously, looking down at his lap for a long moment. Finally, his fingers stop clenching the sheets and he smooths his hands over the fabric, clearing his throat.

“I’m sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable, hyung,” Jeongguk whispers, playing with his fingers. Although he seems calmer now, he’s also turned somewhat shy. “I didn’t mean to. I don’t know why I didn’t lock my door. I just―I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Jimin reassures, rubbing up and down before pulling his hands away. “If anything, I’m sorry I didn’t knock. I’ll be more careful next time.”

Jeongguk nods softly. Jimin reaches out and places his hand on his head, ruffling his hair gently.

“So…we’re okay?” Jeongguk asks, looking up. Jimin’s fingers brush down Jeongguk’s cheek as he does and his hand falls to the sheets.

“Of course, we are. I’m sorry for being so weird about it, I missed you, Jeongguk-ah.”

Jeongguk’s eyes gleam as he shows him that smile of his, nose scrunching.

“I missed you too, hyung,” he whispers back. Jimin smiles back at him, happy that they’ve finally talked about this. He’s hoping that’s all he needed to stop feeling this way. Maybe like this he’ll be able to stop thinking about it so much. “I’m gonna go out for a while,” Jeongguk says, then. Jimin focuses on him again, tilting his head to the side. “I have a couple of things I want to do, since today is our free day. I’m gonna head for the shower.”

Jimin nods, even though it feels a little bit like Jeongguk is running, which he didn’t want in the first place.

“Are you sure everything is alright?” He asks, just in case.

Jeongguk nods eagerly, smiling reassuringly. He slips out of the bed and stands up, grimacing when his head probably hurts. He’s hungover, after all.

“Really, I’m okay, hyung,” he replies. “I’ll see you later?”

Jimin nibbles on his lower lip nervously. He doesn’t really feel like everything is okay, but he’ll trust Jeongguk on this one and let him go.

“Sure, let me know if you need anything, Jeongguk-ah.”

Jeongguk nods. He steps away and trips with something. Jimin shifts, ready to stand up if Jeongguk falls. But he doesn’t. Instead, his cheeks grow red and he clears his throat, turning away and bolting.

When Jimin stands up and walks towards the other side of the bed, he finds Jeongguk’s plushies on the floor. He normally has them on the bed, but it seems that yesterday he left them on the floor. The bunny plushie is sitting there on the ground, mocking Jimin. He figures Jeongguk grew red because he tripped with it. God. Maybe JImin won’t really be able to forget about it, even now that they’ve talked it out.

He shakes his head and turns around. It’ll be fine.

Because he’s still feeling uneasy, he makes his way to Taehyung’s bedroom. Yet he stops when he’s standing in front of the door. He remembers he and Namjoon sneaked out of the living room together last night. With a sigh, he steps back and heads for his room instead. He settles under his covers and reaches for his phone, sending a quick text to Taehyung, asking if he’s busy.

Taehyung’s response comes with his own presence, stepping into his bedroom without bothering to knock. Not that Jimin cares.

“You look like something bad happened,” he states, padding across the room and getting into the bed next to Jimin.

He’s shamelessly dressed in only boxer briefs and Namjoon’s shirt. Jimin cocks an eyebrow and Taehyung just shrugs, grinning happily. Jimin is glad for him.

“So, you slept with Namjoon hyung?” He asks. “You seem pretty happy,” he comments, booping Taehyung’s nose.

Jimin is propped back against the pillows, mostly in a half sitting position. Meanwhile Taehyung has settled on his belly, hugging the pillow to his chest and propped up on his elbows.

“We didn’t, you know, have sex, if that’s what you’re saying,” Taehyung replies. “We did make out and have some fun, though.”

Jimin snorts.

“Either way, you seem happy. So…did you guys talk?” He asks.

“We did, actually,” Taehyung says. “This morning, for a little bit. We talked about it and decided to just go with what felt right for now. And if everything goes well, then we’ll talk with everyone in the group and go from there.”

“I’m pretty sure everybody in the group already knows that you two are basically whipped for each other,” Jimin teases.

Taehyung rolls his eyes and instead focuses on him, tilting his head to the side. “What about you?” He asks. “You seem better, but also kinda stressed out. Did you fix everything with Jeongguk?”

Jimin sighs.

“I already told you, we weren’t fighting,” he insists.

“Okay, fine. You weren’t fighting. But something was happening,” Taehyung says. “I can read right through you, Jimin-ah. So, tell me. Come on, you know it’s worse if you don’t talk about it.”

Jimin groans and tilts his head back, closing his eyes for a moment. He knows. He feels uneasy but he’s sure he’d feel a bit better at least if he talked about it with Taehyung.

“It’s something personal,” he begins. “For Jeongguk, I mean. I was just dealing poorly with it and didn’t tell him about it. So things were weird for a moment. But we talked a while ago and made up, decided to pretend it hadn’t happened and move on.”

“Okay…” Taehyung trails off, not pressuring for more information, only listening to what Jimin is willing to tell him.

“Right now he said he was going to go out for a while, even though he mentioned yesterday that he didn’t want to go out today and instead wanted to stay in bed for our free day,” he continues explaining. “So…I feel like he just ran away. And I’m just worried. That things won’t go back to normal, I mean.”

Taehyung hums. He snuggles into the pillow, getting more comfortable and nods to himself for a couple of seconds.

“Well, he did tell you that everything was fine, right?” He asks. When Jimin nods, he continues. “Maybe he is running. But it might be just because he needs some time alone.”

Jimin contemplates. It might be. He walked in on him humping the plushie that Jimin gifted him. And Jeongguk had seemed so embarrassed about the whole thing. Taehyung is probably right. He stays silent, mostly thinking to himself for a couple of seconds. Until Taehyung’s voice interrupts his thoughts.

“Are you sure you guys didn’t fuck?” Taehyung asks. “Because you’re being oddly vague about this whole―”

“We didn’t fuck,” Jimin grumbles, covering his face with his hands because god, he really doesn’t need that image in his brain right now.

He’s trying to stay true to their promise of pretending it never happened and it’s already so hard to not think about Jeongguk on his bed, plushie in between his legs, naked from the waist down and―

“See, you have that expression on your face, like you’re remembering something good,” Taehyung points out, making Jimin’s face heat up.

He drops his hands and shakes his head.

“It’s not that,” he states. “We didn’t fuck, okay?”

Taehyung laughs, boxy smile making Jimin’s lips pull up as well. Taehyung sighs deeply and presses his face to the pillow.

“Well, whatever it is,” he starts, lifting his head just to speak. “You guys talked and that’s what matters. It will surely go back to normal now.”

He shoves his face into the pillow again as soon as he’s done speaking and Jimin lets his words sink for a moment. He really hopes that everything will go back to normal. At least, as normal as things can be after that, because if Jimin is being honest to himself, he just doesn’t believe he’ll ever be able to see Jeongguk the same way.

Mostly, because he’s always hoping, thinking and imagining Jeongguk’s hands on him, touching him gently, showing him affection. Affection. God, Jimin is such a mess. It’s that, yes, but then it’s also so much more.

His heart beats so fast for Jeongguk, his whole body wants his warmth and closeness. It’s far more that just affection. But he can’t face that right now, first he needs to make sure that everything is fine with Jeongguk.

↢↣

Jimin isn’t sure what time it is when he feels his bed dipping, sheets rustling as a body settles under them beside him. The whole day went by without a single word from Jeongguk, no response to his messages. He laid down worried because it was late and he hadn’t come back, so he must have fallen asleep at some point.

The second he realizes it’s Jeongguk settling under the covers, his eyes snap open and he searches for him in the dark.

“Jeongguk-ah?” He asks, blindly reaching out for him until his fingers fall to his shoulder.

“I’m sorry for waking you up, hyung,” Jeongguk whispers, his voice so low and so gentle, as if Jimin was still sleeping and he didn’t want to wake him up.

“It’s okay,” Jimin reassures, his eyes starting to adjust and finally allowing him to see the outlines of Jeongguk’s face. “Are you okay, Jeongguk-ah? You disappeared the whole day, I was so worried,” he confesses. And maybe it’s because he just woke up and he’s still a bit drowsy with sleep, but he can’t stop himself from continuing on with the next words. “You said everything was fine but then you left like that, and I just―”

“Hyung,” Jeongguk interrupts. “I’m sorry for disappearing. I was just…” he trails off, sighing deeply. “I was embarrassed, okay? I just wanted to be alone for a while.”

Jimin instantly relaxes. Taehyung had told him that and Jimin had been reassured, but throughout the day, he started to grow worried again. He lets his hand slides up, fingers moving in between Jeongguk’s hair strands. He scratches at his scalp gently, more to reassure himself, but also because he knows Jeongguk has always liked that.

He does seem calmer than he was earlier. He isn’t nervous, if anything, he seems more relaxed. He gives in to Jimin’s touch like he always has, sliding closer, feet brushing under the covers. Through his sleepy state, Jimin is vaguely aware of the fact that this is making his heart race and his body warm up. But he pays it no mind in favor of just allowing himself to be close to Jeongguk the way they used to before he started feeling so…conflicted.

“I’m sorry for making you feel embarrassed,” Jimin whispers, combing his fingers through Jeongguk’s hair in a slower motion, his body urging him to go back to sleep.

“It’s not your fault,” Jeongguk whispers. “Go back to sleep, hyung. I’m sorry for waking you up.”

Jimin shakes his head and tells him that its’ fine, but his eyes flutter closed, anyway and he finds it harder to keep his fingers moving. Jeongguk shifts and the movement makes Jimin’s eyes snap open, worried he’ll leave. Yet Jeongguk is only turning around and getting comfortable, his hand softly tugging at Jimin’s wrist so that he wraps his arm around him.

This isn’t anything new, but Jimin is so highly aware of how warm Jeongguk’s body feels, how his back feels pressed to his chest and how his hand holds Jimin’s tightly against his chest as he’s hugged from behind. Jeongguk smells nice, so familiar. Jimin closes his eyes again and presses his nose to Jeongguk’s nape, telling himself that it’s fine, it’s just cuddling, they’re just sleeping next to each other like several times before.

“Are you sure everything is okay?” He asks gently, painfully aware of how Jeongguk shudders when he speaks against his skin. He presses back closer, so Jimin also holds him tighter.

Jeongguk nods and Jimin feels it because they’re so close.

“Everything is okay,” he whispers into the silent night.

So, Jimin believes him. He nods and nuzzles his nose into Jeongguk’s skin, allowing sleep to start taking over him. Because he was so sleepy already, it doesn’t take him long to start to doze off.

As he’s falling asleep, he thinks he hears Jeongguk say something, something like ‘can’t stop thinking’ but sleep takes over him before he can understand it fully and Jeongguk’s words are left hanging in the darkness of Jimin’s bedroom.

↢↣

Everything goes back to normal, but at the same time it doesn’t. Jimin keeps noticing things, keeps catching himself staring at Jeongguk, looking at him across the room, his heart beating fast at the sight of him. Jimin gets used to the feeling quickly as days and weeks go by. His and Jeongguk’s eyes will meet and they’ll look away at the very same time, shy smiles taking over their lips.

Jeongguk will linger around Jimin more often, he’ll glue himself to his side and spend more time just talking to him, even when they’re all so busy with their schedules. And he’ll sleep more in his bed, slip in whenever Jimin is sleeping and he’ll wake up with Jeongguk’s arms around him, his body pressed close.

He doesn’t mind. God, he likes it a little too much.

And then…things start to get weird. At first, Jimin didn’t notice it. He didn’t think twice about it, didn’t really see it. But then it became something obvious. To him. Only him, who knew. Who had seen Jeongguk that one time.

Jimin noticed for the first time when they were all at their dorm. Yoongi, Hoseok and him were sitting in the living room, just spending some time there before going to bed, because they were still buzzing with the energy of the day. And Jeongguk had come out, directly heading towards Yoongi.

“Hyung, did you put my pillowcase in the washing machine?” He asks, his voice soft.

Jimin doesn’t move his eyes away from his phone even though he really wants to. Lately, all he wants is to look at Jeongguk, explore every inch of his beautiful face.

“I did, why?” Yoongi asks.

It was his turn to do the laundry this week. They take turns with stuff like that, but Yoongi tends to take up on the task more often than not because he finds it relaxing and he actually enjoys doing it.

“The one I had on is my favorite one, you know I like how soft it is,” he mumbles.

Jimin wills himself not to react. He’s hopelessly endeared because Jeongguk is really so particular about these things that for other people might not be important. Jimin doesn’t particularly care about his pillowcases, but Jeongguk likes anything that’s soft and when it comes to where he sleeps, he often is very picky about the material. He’s not surprised that he’s asking about this.

“Sorry, Jeongguk-ah,” Yoongi replies. “I had to do the laundry.”

“Yeah, but the pillowcase was a new one, I barely put it on yesterday,” he goes on.

Yoongi chuckles.

“Come on, Gguk-ah,” Yoongi voices out. “If you want something soft, just hug one of your many plushies.”

Jimin doesn’t mean to. He really doesn’t. But the second Yoongi mentions the plushies, his eyes snap up from his phone and move to Jeongguk. And god, it’s like the same thought goes through Jeongguk’s brain because he’s already looking back at Jimin, his face red almost instantly.

He looks back down at his phone before anybody can notice, but his skin is heating up again and his body is warm and he also feels a little bit red in the face. God, now all he can think about is the plushie and Jeongguk and just―

“Yeah, honestly. You have like a million of those, I’m sure you’ll survive one day, Jeonggukie,” Hoseok teases, oblivious to the fact that his words are only making Jeongguk grow hotter and hotter by the second.

Jimin can’t help it. His eyes move up again. Jeongguk is looking at him, hands closed in fists. He looks…worked up, as if he too is thinking about what Jimin is thinking.

“Okay, yeah,” Jeongguk mutters, stepping back. “I just really like that pillowcase,” he mumbles, turning around before anything else can be said.

He disappears into his room quickly, but even then, Jimin can’t stop seeing him, can’t stop thinking about him, can’t stop his brain from wandering towards dangerous places.

“He’s so particular about these things, it’s so cute,” Hoseok mentions, although his attention is still fully focused on his phone.

“Yeah. I feel kinda bad, though,” Yoongi replies, standing up. Jimin follows him with his gaze, realizing that he can’t focus on his phone anymore. He’s too conscious about here, about right now, about Jeongguk. “I’m gonna check if I can hurry up the process and give Jeongguk his pillowcase.”

Jimin stands up and heads to his room before he can make a fool of himself. He drops down to his bed with a groan, forcing his brain to shut down because if he doesn’t, he’ll continue to think about Jeongguk and that will make him think about that night and god knows how hard he’s been working to forget about it. Sleep doesn’t come easy that night, but fortunately, it ends up taking over.

The next day, he pretends not to notice Jeongguk’s red face when they cross early in the morning. And when Yoongi asks him if he slept better with his favorite pillowcase that he made an effort to get back to him faster, Jimin pretends not to notice how Jeongguk disappears quicker into his room after muttering that he did indeed sleep much better.

It keeps happening. Whenever anybody so much as mentions the plushies, Jeongguk will grow so red that the rest of the members will genuinely grow concerned. But every time, he rushes off to his room after reassuring them that he’s fine. Yet Jimin knows. He knows why Jeongguk grows red in the face and it’s driving him crazy.

He said that he didn’t usually do that, but Jimin can’t help and wonder…has he done it again? Has he thought about Jimin whenever he has. No. Surely, he hasn’t. Why would he? Or is his brain plagued with that image just like Jimin’s is.

Tension starts to grow around them. Taehyung keeps sending Jimin this gaze, as if he’s perfectly aware of what’s going on. But Jimin ignores him and continues to reassure him that everything is perfectly fine.

It’s only a couple of weeks later that all of Jimin’s selfcontrol breaks and he gives in to what his heart and body are begging him for. It happens on a free day. It’s not supposed to be a free day, but their schedule allows them to take the day for themselves and everybody makes plans to do their thing and take advantage of it. Jimin, on the other hand, prefers to just stay in and rest.

Of course, because life just likes fucking him over, Jeongguk decides that too. And it hits Jimin that they’ll be alone in the dorm, that they’ll have the place to themselves and even though everything is supposed to be fine and normal between them, Jimin knows he’s not the only one who’s noticed how things have started to turn so…intense between them. Jeongguk has surely felt it too.

So when the younger one suddenly takes a seat beside him in the living room, Jimin’s heart almost leaps out of his ass. He tries his best not to let it show, but he notices the way Jeongguk’s lips tug up slightly and it makes his cheeks heat up.

“Hi, hyung,” Jeongguk breathes out, his smile genuine as Jimin looks towards him.

“Hey, Jeongguk-ah,” he replies softly, shifting in spot and setting his phone down. Jeongguk is...wet. There’s sweat trailing down his temples and his hair is damp. He must have just gotten back home from exercising. “Just came from the gym?” He asks.

“Yup,” Jeongguk says. “I’m beat.”

“Don’t overexert yourself, Jeongguk-ah,” Jimin tells him, showing him a small smile. “You’re very big already."

Jeongguk hums.

“I can’t stop, hyung. I don’t wanna lose my stamina.”

Maybe Jimin’s brain has forever been corrupted. Because Jeongguk is clearly not saying that to imply anything, yet Jimin’s mind goes to other places and he finds himself growing warm. He shifts in spot, aware that he’s acting like a horny teenager and feeling incredibly embarrassed about it.

If Jeongguk notices where his thoughts go, he doesn’t do or say anything to show it. If anything, he looks a little bit lost in thought now, looking down at his lap and playing with his fingers nervously.

“You won’t lose your stamina, brat,” he shoots back. “You’re young and healthy. You can rest, don’t forget that,” he goes on.

Jeongguk hums. “I know that, hyung,” he whispers.

Still distracted. Jimin’s heart starts beating faster, just wondering what he’s thinking about, why he’s suddenly grown like this when he was smiling and joking around just a couple of seconds ago. It’s making it hard for him to focus and keep his mind from going to dark places again. And just when he’s about to excuse himself to go back to his room, Jeongguk speaks up again.

“I’ve been thinking,” Jeongguk begins, reaching up to scratch at his neck. He’s not looking at Jimin and his words, for some reason, make his heart speed up even more in his chest. “You said that you didn’t tell me anything about it because you didn’t want me to feel embarrassed, but I just keep thinking that...it doesn’t make sense.”

Jimin is so fucked. Honest to god, royally fucked. Because there’s something about the way Jeongguk is saying all of this. His voice is low and somewhat nervous, but he’s also very much intentionally sitting right next to Jimin, pressed to him even though there’s a whole lot of space to his right. And when his eyes move towards him, they hold something far from innocent.

He’s not sure how they suddenly got here, but he knows there’s just no running away. He’s caged. He’s trapped. It’s making his body feel too hot and he’s nervous.

“Jeongguk,” he tries, not particularly sure of what he was planning to say. But Jeongguk keeps going as soon as Jimin closes his mouth to think.

“Hyung,” he whispers, leaning towards him just the slightest bit. It already feels like he’s too close for Jimin to breathe. But he doesn’t move away. He just can’t, completely entranced by Jeongguk’s closeness, by how he’s looking at him so intensely. “I want to know the real reason why you didn’t tell me about seeing me,” he says.

Jimin swallows down the lump in his throat. He knows they’re in a place where any of the members could just walk out at any moment, but that’s not something that worries him considering the fact that they’re just sitting here, talking. What worries him is actually the fact that his skin is starting to warm up, body growing uncomfortably hot. Jeongguk hasn’t even said anything that could be making him feel this way, but Jimin is reacting so strongly to his closeness.

“That’s the real reason,” he whispers weakly, shaking his head, a poor attempt at saving his soul because god knows he’s been swimming in guilt for what feels like a lifetime.

His palms are sweating, his body is so tense that he can feel the pull on his muscles. But Jeongguk just tilts his head to the side and continues to stare at him, as if oblivious about the fact that everything that’s happening here right now is fucking with Jimin’s brain.

“I want the truth, hyung,” Jeongguk pleads, his voice so soft and strangely reassuring. “Please tell me.”

It’s like his eyes are hypnotizing. Jimin has always been weak for Jeongguk, always bending at his will, giving him anything he wants. But this is something so different and it’s startling to discover that even now, Jimin is completely at his mercy. He doesn’t hate it. He actually likes it far too much.

Jimin tells him. The words just leave his lips before he can stop them.

“I didn’t tell you because I couldn’t stop thinking about it,” he murmurs, clearing his throat when someone comes out to the kitchen. He can’t even look away from Jeongguk, he’s too lost in the way his eyes widen a bit and his lips part, as if he wasn’t expecting Jimin to confess this.

He has no idea of who came out, but they come and go without saying anything. He and Jeongguk are left alone again. The air around them is charged with tension, so strong that Jimin is finding it hard to stay calm.

Out of everything Jimin would have expected him to reply, what Jeongguk says is not one of those things.

“Okay.”

That’s it. He says that and then clears his throat, shifting in his seat, turning his body away from Jimin’s. Jimin blinks back at him without being sure of what to say. He’s confused, but also still very tense. Because god, he has no idea of what’s going on, he has no idea of where this is even going. What was Jeongguk aiming for with this conversation?

“I also haven’t been able to stop thinking about it,” Jeongguk adds, probably a little bit too late. By then, Jimin has already made up so many scenarios in his head. They’re all shut down the second Jeongguk keeps going. “Everybody will be leaving, later,” Jeongguk states, his voice much lower, such a low whisper that Jimin has to lean a bit towards him in order to be able to hear properly. “It’s been a while since I…” he trails off, pausing and nervously looking behind himself, as if expecting someone to be there, listening to their conversation. Yet they’re alone in the living room and Jeongguk looks back down to his lap, playing with his fingers. “Since nobody else will be here aside from us, I’m going to make very good use of that time,” he finally says. Jimin’s brain immediately interprets that as something entirely different to what anybody else would think. It’s just the way in which Jeongguk is speaking, how he’s being suggestive about it, seeming completely unfazed by the fact that Jimin just confessed he wasn’t able to stop thinking about seeing him humping his plushie. “So...if you want to come over to my room, you can.”

Jimin feels like he’s dreaming. Because he knows Jeongguk hasn’t said the words, but he’s also very much invited him to come over to his room when everybody leaves and he said he would make very good use of that time and it’s inevitable for him to assume just what that means.

It can’t be, right?

“Jeongguk, are you―” he begins to ask, but he’s interrupted by the sound of footsteps walking down the hallway.

Jimin doesn’t look to find out who they are, he’s still too focused on Jeongguk to do anything else than stare at him.

“Yes,” Jeongguk says. “I’ll be waiting for you, if you want to come, hyung,” he adds softly, moving to stand up.

Jimin is frozen in place, unable to say anything or move, so completely taken aback by the fact that Jeongguk just asked him to come to his room later, when everybody else has left. He sinks down in place, staring off ahead. He knows he won’t be able to think about anything else for the rest of the day, not now that Jeongguk just suggested that. The image comes back, it takes over, all he can see is Jeongguk on his bed, humping his plushie, desperate to cum.

“Is everything okay?” Yoongi’s voice makes Jimin literally jump in his spot.

He’s met with curious and worried eyes. Jimin’s skin is uncomfortably hot and this is far too dangerous. He clears his throat and nods, quickly standing up so that he can run off to his room.

“Perfect. Everything is perfectly fine, hyung,” he reassures.

Yoongi doesn’t question why Jimin runs off and Jimin is grateful. Even as he closes the door behind himself, he finds that his heart is beating too fast for him to breathe properly and his brain just keeps reminding him of that image of Jeongguk.

It’s all he can see again and he’s not sure he’ll be able to survive the rest of this day because, even if he tells himself he won’t do anything about it, he’ll stay in bed and pretend Jeongguk didn’t suggest anything, he knows very damn well that when the time comes, he’ll be struggling to stay in his room.

↢↣

Time has never gone by so slow.

Jimin spends what feels like a lifetime in bed, just laying down, staring at the ceiling, hearing the rest of the guys shuffle out of their rooms. The dorm door opens once, twice, a third time. The house slowly grows quiet as Jimin’s heart starts to quicken just at the thought of what’s approaching.

By the time everybody has left, Jimin sits up on his bed and stares off ahead, unsure of what to do. He nibbles on his lower lip nervously, letting his eyes settle on his door, almost expecting Jeongguk to come in and tell him it was all a joke. Because god knows it’s too good to be true.

He waits a couple of minutes, no sound coming from outside, no sound letting him know of Jeongguk’s presences outside, even though he knows he’s in the house right now. They’re the only ones home. Jimin swallows down the lump in his throat and reaches for his phone, opening up his chat with Jeongguk.

Hesitantly, he writes a message, but then ends up erasing before sending. What’s he even supposed to say? With a groan, he finally decides on what to write.

From: You

Jeongguk.

Instantly, Jeongguk’s reply comes in. Jimin is so startled he jumps in spot, looking down at his phone with wide eyes.

From: Jeongguk

Hyung.

From: You

Are you sure?

Are you really sure you want me to come?

The phrasing is so wrong. Jimin doesn’t know how everything led to this, but he’s not stupid. If Jeongguk has asked him to come over when he’s going to…then it means he wants it. Jimin just needs to be sure because once they do this, whatever it might be, there won’t be coming back. And even though Jimin knows nothing could ever ruin their friendship and how much they love each other, he’s still scared it’ll be something they could end up regretting.

From: Jeongguk

Yes.

I really want you to come, hyung.

Jimin thinks about it for a second, urging himself to actually focus and not let himself be guided by his intense pull towards Jeongguk. A new message comes in before he can figure out what to reply.

From: Jeongguk

Only if you want that too.

Jimin snorts. He wants it. He wants it so badly that his skin is already so warm and his body feels…god, he feels so turned on just by thinking about it.

From: You

I want to.

I really haven’t been able to stop thinking about it.

I just want to know if you’re sure because…

I don’t want us to do anything you might regret.

From: Jeongguk

I trust you, hyung.

I won’t regret it.

It’s something I haven’t been able to stop thinking about since you told me you saw me.

And it took me a while to work up the courage to tell you.

Since today we’re alone…I thought it would be the right moment.

Jimin stares at the messages for a couple of seconds, trying to figure out what to say. He doesn’t want to sound too desperate, even though he’s very much ready to bolt out of his room and go looking for Jeongguk.

From: You

We have to talk about it.

The bubbles pop up once, then disappear and pop up once more, but end up disappearing once again. Jimin is about ready to send a new text, but Jeongguk’s response finally comes along.

From: Jeongguk

Can’t we talk…after?

I want us to talk too, but right now…

Jimin’s eyebrows furrow. Jeongguk doesn’t continue and Jimin’s curiosity spikes.

From: You

Right now…?

Jeongguk takes a very long time to reply. Meanwhile, Jimin’s nervousness continues to grow. He nibbles on his nail, waiting with his heart in his hand and his body shaking the slightest bit.

From: Jeongguk

I’m kinda worked up, hyung.

Blood rushes south and Jimin’s head suddenly spins. He’s worked up. Jeongguk―fuck. Jimin sits up, fingers shaking when his brain starts to imagine just what Jeongguk might be doing. Has he already started? Because the last person left a while ago. Before he can figure out just what to reply, Jeongguk sends a new message.

From: Jeongguk

I’m sorry if I’m making this hard for you, hyung.

Jimin’s lips tug up at Jeongguk’s words. He’s teasing. Jimin can even imagine him saying those words. He just never thought that Jeongguk would tease with something like this.

From: You

You’re such a brat.

Teasing me like that.

Yes, you are.

But, honestly. I’ve been a mess ever since that day, Jeongguk.

I keep seeing it.

Jeongguk’s response comes quickly.

From: Jeongguk

And I keep thinking about what you saw.

What you thought.

Ever since the day you told me…

I kept imagining you watching me, hyung.

Jimin sucks in a breath of air, standing up. He stays like that, not ready to move towards the door just yet. But he’s getting worked up, too. His skin is burning and there’s arousal forming in his belly and his cock twitches in interest.

From: You

Yeah?

Did you like the idea of my watching so much that you had to invite me over?

Jeongguk doesn’t reply immediately. He’s awfully silent for a good minute before his response makes Jimin’s phone vibrate and it startles him.

From: Jeongguk

Yes, hyung.

I wanted it so badly.

Jimin is quick to write his reply.

From: You

I’m glad you did.

I can’t believe it, actually.

I don’t even know how I made it through the day.

From: Jeongguk

Then…come over, hyung.

I’ll be waiting for you.

Jimin hesitates. Should he reply? Or should he just go? God. With a groan, he throws his phone onto his bed and rubs his hands over his face. He can’t believe he’s going to actually go to Jeongguk’s room and…watch him. Maybe more. Whatever Jeongguk is okay with.

He leaves his room, his feet guiding him down the corridor towards the other side of the house, where Jeongguk’s room is. The house is awfully silent, but the fact that nobody is home makes Jimin think about Jeongguk being loud, not muffling his moans the way he did the last time Jimin saw him. His dick twitches in interest. He’s going to make a fool of himself.

He stops in front of Jeongguk’s door, swallowing down the lump in his throat. He just stands there for a moment, staring at the door as if that will do something. He can’t hear anything, even if he’s focusing. He knows it’s probably not the case, but wouldn’t it be funny if he ended up being that Jeongguk didn’t invite him over to watch?

God, Jimin doesn’t know what to expect from this, but he’s here now and Jeongguk told him to come and he’s way past trying to convince himself that this isn’t something he’s desperately thought about for what feels like a lifetime.

Jimin takes a deep breath. He reaches for the door knob and steps in, closing the door behind himself and locking it, just in case anybody decides to come back earlier. His eyes immediately move to the bed the second he hears the click and he freezes.

Maybe a part of him was expecting to still find Jeongguk sitting on the bed…waiting. But there was also a part of him that wondered if he’d find him like this. Either way, it shocks him. It leaves him staring, completely mesmerized.

He’s seen this before, he’s had this image in his brain for such a long time. But he only got to see for a second the last time and the rest was left to his imagination. This time, he gets to stare, he gets to look. Jeongguk invited him to come.

Despite knowing that, Jimin looks away.

“Hyung,” Jeongguk’s voice is strained, husky. “I almost thought you wouldn’t come,” he breathes out. And then, softly: “I asked you to come, you can look, hyung.”

There’s something so intense about knowing that Jeongguk wants him to watch. Jimin isn’t sure of why all of this is fucking with his head so much. He’s been turned on several times before, of course. But this…this feels ten times more intense. This feels like a single wrong move will make him step too close to the edge.

When his eyes fall to Jeongguk’s body once more, Jimin’s belly fills with arousal because even though he just stepped in, he’s still moving. His hips are pushing forward in slow waves, dragging against the pillow settled under him.

He recognizes the pillow case and it makes his lips twitch because of course he’s using his favorite one to hump his pillow. Is that what it’s all about? Liking soft things, being so sensitive to soft textures and anything that smells nice? Jimin won’t ever be able to think about it without remembering this. He keeps thinking back on all those moments Jeongguk’s face went red when someone mentioned his plushies, how his eyes moved to Jimin as if also remembering. Is it going to be like that forever now?

“Say something, please,” Jeongguk whispers, his voice breaking towards the end when his hips stutter forward.

Jimin is hard. He doesn’t know just when it happened, but he’s pretty sure he wasn’t anywhere near half hard when he stepped into this room. He’s really going to make a fool of himself today. But he doesn’t really care.

“I’m sorry, I just…” he trails off, shaking his head. He swallows down the lump in his throat and steps forward. “You’re so hot, Jeongguk.”

Jeongguk’s cheeks are flushed already, but Jimin can swear he sees him blush furthermore. His eyebrows furrow and his fingers fist the sheets and Jimin’s eyes are once more drawn to his body. He’s only wearing a shirt, but it’s bunched up around his waist, exposing his lower back, all the way down to his beautiful ass.

Oh god, Jimin can see the muscle clenching every time he thrusts forward. His thighs are bracketing the pillow, strong and big thighs. Jimin is pulled forward like a moth drawn to a flame. He doesn’t even realize that he’s walking until he reaches the side of the bed, towering over Jeongguk’s body.

He wants to reach out and touch him, just trail his fingers over his already sweaty skin, feel his warmth.

Jeongguk makes this soft sound, half a moan, half a whine. Jimin’s heart jumps in his chest just at the sight. He’s not sure of what he’s allowed to do here, how far he can take this. He wants to touch himself so badly, just alleviate the pressure a bit. But he doesn’t do that and instead stays focused on Jeongguk.

“Were you doing this while we were texting?” He asks, breathless. “Is that why you said you didn’t want to talk? Because you were already too far gone to stop?”

Jeongguk whimpers. The sound is beautiful to Jimin’s ears. Jimin has always enjoyed teasing him and right now, the thought of making Jeongguk lose control, of riling him up enough that he whimpers again, it makes his head spin.

“You were, huh?” He asks, crouching down beside the bed so that his face is leveled up with Jeongguk’s.

“Not at the beginning,” Jeongguk rushes to say. His cheek is pressed to the mattress, eyes glazed over in pleasure. “When you mentioned watching me…I just couldn’t hold back anymore.”

“We still have to talk, though,” Jimin whispers. Jeongguk seems just about ready to protest, so Jimin keeps going. “We’ll talk more later,” he reassures. “But I still need to know…what do you want from me, Jeongguk-ah? Because I could very much continue watching you, see you grow desperate as you get closer to your orgasm. I could touch you, talk to you…anything you want. Believe me, I’m already so fucking turned on just by being here.”

Jeongguk stares at him with wide eyes. But then he closes them and his lips part, a moan leaving them when his hips start picking up the pace.

“I want you to cum, too,” Jeongguk blurts out. “I want you to talk to me, tease me, whatever you want, hyung. You can just watch me, if you want that, too. I’ll make you cum later. Anything, please,” he mumbles, a mess of words that make Jimin’s brain turn into mush.

There are so many things he wants. And, even though he’s a desperate guy, even though he’s been imagining this so many times since the day he saw, he tells himself that they can do whatever they want after they’ve talked. For now, he’ll be content enough with just watching Jeongguk and jerking off once it gets too intense for his dick.

“Keep going then, Jeongguk-ah,” he whispers, reaching out tentatively and placing his hand on Jeongguk’s hair.

Far from tensing up, Jeongguk sighs deeply, as if relieved by Jimin’s touch. So Jimin cards his fingers through his hair, touching him softly despite the fact that Jeongguk is desperately humping his pillow like the world depends on it. Jimin wonders how long he’s been going, if he’s close already.

“Are you close?” He asks, his voice a low murmur that makes Jeongguk’s eyes open again.

Jeongguk shakes his head.

“It always takes me a while,” he mutters. “That’s why I―it’s why I like it.”

Jimin suddenly wants to know absolutely everything Jeongguk likes. He wants to ask and see and so much more.

“Is that why you like soft textures so much?” He asks. “Is that what you’re thinking about whenever you find something soft?” He teases.

Jeongguk’s eyes widen. “N-no,” he stutters out. “Just―I only ever do it with my pillow. I don’t―”

“I don’t know, Jeongguk-ah,” Jimin goes on, slowly letting his fingers trail down Jeongguk’s head, towards the base. He presses his fingers into the skin of his nape, squeezing in a gentle way, the same way he always has, but this time with intent, with a whole different meaning behind the touch. “Don’t think I’ve forgotten how worked up you got when Yoongi hyung took your pillowcase away a while ago. Were you planning to do this that day? Is that why you wanted it?”

Jeongguk whines, suddenly moving his arms up. He places his hand above his head, fisting the sheets and folds the other one so that he can press his heated face into the crook of his elbow.

“It’s my favorite pillowcase,” he mumbles, as if that’s explanation enough.

Jimin bites down on his lower lip, sliding his fingers further down, even though he’s met with the collar of Jeongguk’s shirt. He pulls away, wondering if lower is safe territory, if it’s okay for him to go there. God, he can’t believe this is actually happening. It all feels too good to be true and he’s scared he’ll wake up any second to find out it’s just a dream.

“Is that why it’s your favorite pillowcase?” He asks. “Because the soft material is nice to thrust against? Tell me how good it feels, Jeongguk,” he whispers, tilting his head to the side. He can’t see Jeongguk’s face anymore, but he finds that he doesn’t mind it because he can see the way Jeongguk is fisting the sheets and how his hips are moving desperately and he can imagine just what his expression looks like.

“So good, hyung,” Jeongguk breathes out. His whines are growing louder, pushing past his lips every couple of seconds. Jimin can’t help but wonder just how long it takes him to cum when he does this. He wants to ask but he also doesn’t want to distract Jeongguk.

He’s silent for a while. The position he’s in, crouching down, it doesn’t really help with his hard-on. But he’s mesmerized by Jeongguk, especially when his eyes trail down towards his hips. He has a steady pace, hips moving in circles every couple of seconds, but then going back to thrusting forward.

God, Jimin really wants to touch him. He wants to feel how the muscles clench whenever he moves. It’s a weird thought. He just wants to feel Jeongguk’s skin, his warmth. He also wants to jerk of so badly, but that’s something he can put off for now, as long as he can focus on Jeongguk.

“I want hyung to touch me,” Jeongguk blurts out, suddenly lifting his face from where it was hiding.

Jimin swallows the lump in his throat.

“Can I ask for something, too?” He whispers.

“Anything,” Jeongguk quickly replies.

God, Jeongguk will be the death of him. Jimin stands up because he wants to have a full sight of Jeongguk’s body, he wants to see it all.

“I want you to prop yourself up on your elbows and to bite down on your shirt the same way you were the day I saw you,” he whispers. “Can you do that for hyung, Jeongguk-ah?”

There’s a moment during which Jeongguk doesn’t stop moving, continues to drag his hips across the pillow. But then he’s scrambling into the new position, pulling the shirt up until he’s biting down on it and keeping it out of the way. He settles on his elbows, fingers still fisting the sheets as his hips start moving one more.

He hesitates, looking towards Jimin for a second. Finally, he lets the shirt fall and speaks.

“Like that, hyung? I can’t―”

“I know,” Jimin interrupts, reaching for Jeongguk’s shirt and helping him bite down on it again. “I want to hear you like this, moaning around the shirt, desperate to cum. So don’t stop moving, Jeongguk-ah. Hyung wants to know what you look like when you cum.” Jeongguk nods, eyes fluttering closed as pleasure starts to take over him again. Time slows down, everything in the room feels so hot and so intense. Jimin places his hand in between Jeongguk’s shoulder blades. “Is touching here okay?” He asks with a soft whisper.

Jeongguk nods again, making a soft sound that Jimin thinks is a whine, but he’s not sure. Like this, he can look at Jeongguk fully. So he focuses on him. He slides his fingers further down and continues to ask Jeongguk if it’s okay, each time getting a nods from him, followed by that sound. When Jimin’s fingers touch skin again, Jeongguk trembles. His hips lose their pace and he settles for slow grinding, moving them in circles.

He seems to be struggling to breathe properly, but he whines when Jimin slides his fingertips across his skin, down until he reaches the end of his back. It’s so surreal to be looking at Jeongguk while he’s doing this. Even now, Jimin is struggling to believe it’s real. He doesn’t venture further down. He presses his fingers into the skin, towards the side, reaching Jeongguk’s right hip.

“You’re so beautiful, Jeongguk,” he whispers, unable to stop himself. “Just as beautiful as you did that night I walked in on you. All flushed skin and strong muscles, desperate whines, muffled around your shirt.” Jeongguk chooses that moment to make another sound and it makes Jimin groan. It’s becoming so difficult to ignore his hard-on. “Fuck, you make it so hard to hold back.”

Jeongguk’s voice immediately jumps in.

“Don’t hold back, hyung,” Jeongguk pleads. “You’ve been hard for so long. You can―I mean, if you want. You can touch yourself.”

Jimin hesitates. He wants to keep touching and looking at Jeongguk, but he’s so lost in pleasure that Jimin too wants to be lost like that, especially if he has Jeongguk to look at while he does so.

He contemplates for a moment wether he should just shove his hand in his sweats or slide them down to properly jerk off. He figures it’s only fair considering the fact Jeongguk is naked from the waist down. Sure, it’s his ass that’s exposed, but still. Finally, he gives in and slides them down enough that his cock is freed. He wraps his hand around it and tugs, sighing deeply at the pleasant feeling.

Pleasure makes his toes curl and his thighs tremble the slightest bit. He groans when he realizes how sensitive he is after being hard for a long time. As if on cue, Jeongguk whimpers loudly and that makes Jimin’s eyes move up to Jeongguk’s body again. Jeongguk’s hips are picking up the pace once more. It’s hard to tell if he’s growing close or not yet. Jeongguk seems to have a sensitive body, by the way he reacts to every small movement he makes.

Jimin stores that information for later and instead looks at Jeongguk. He’s met with his gaze already on him, watching shamelessly now that Jimin is jerking off. He tries his best to settle for the same pace Jeongguk has, but he finds it too hard when Jeongguk is watching and also trying to keep the same pace as him. It brings a smile to Jimin’s lips, makes him feel warm all over.

Touching Jeongguk while he’s jerking off now feels like far too much, so he steps back and just…looks. For a long while, all that can be heard in the room is their pants, Jeongguk’s loud moans every once in a while, the rustling of sheets.

Jeongguk covers his mouth with his hand, muffling a whine and Jimin shakes his head even though he’s not looking at him

“I want to hear you, Jeongguk-ah,” he pleads. “Don’t cover your mouth.”

Jeongguk does as he’s told immediately.

“Hyung, I’m close,” Jeongguk mumbles, suddenly dropping back down to the bed. He reaches down, right hand sliding under the pillow, pressing it harder against him. “So close, I can’t―fuck.”

Warmth spreads across Jimin’s belly, he strokes himself faster. He’s close too, not as much as Jeongguk is but he can already feel it building inside his groin, pleasure making his skin tingle in that beautifully pleasant way. It’s just that Jeongguk is such a wonderful sight for sore eyes. Pretty skin flushed and covered in sweat, thighs strong and clenching even tighter around the pillow he’s fucking into.

God, he’s so sexy Jimin can’t even wrap his head around it. There’s something about his tattooed fingers closed around the pillow so desperately, about his tattoed arm under his body, helping himself with the pleasure. Jimin is in a trance. He keeps stroking himself at a steady pace, but he’s mostly just mesmerized by the show Jeongguk is putting up for him.

It’s when Jeongguk’s teary eyes meet his that something in Jimin just absolutely breaks. Tears. Fucking tears are in his eyes. It’s like his body is moving on impulse. He leans down enough that his face is leveled up with Jeongguk’s.

“Jeongguk, I want to kiss you,” he whispers. “Can I kiss you?” He asks, not really sure of what’s taken over him but not really wanting to push it away.

There’s so much pleasure in Jeongguk’s gaze, his expression is hazy and Jimin is almost sure he’ll end up cumming any moment, but Jeongguk nods mindlessly, tilting his head back and closing his eyes again. The next time Jeongguk moans, Jimin swallows it down with his mouth.

Kissing Jeongguk is better than anything he’s ever felt before. His plump lips are soft and shaky as he struggles to kiss Jimin properly while still being on the verge of cumming. And when he does, because he was so close to doing so before Jimin asked to kiss him, he doesn’t hold back on groaning into Jimin’s mouth, body shaking violently as he pushes over the edge.

Jimin kisses him through out it all. He already knows that he wants to kiss Jeongguk again, in another situation, when they can fully focus on it, but for now, he’s content with this. So he swallows down the sounds he’s making and kisses his lips messily while Jeongguk continues to tremble.

He realizes that he’s stopped moving his hand―which shouldn’t be so surprising considering he has so many things to focus on―and goes back to stroking himself. The sudden pleasure punches a moan out of his lungs and he stops kissing Jeongguk, lips just pressed to his, breaths mingling as they pant through the pleasure.

It doesn’t take him much longer, not with Jeongguk’s lewd sounds and with the whole situation itself. He strokes himself until he feels his orgasm explode around him, knees giving in. He manages to hold himself up with a hand on the bed but he doubles forward, body trembling as he makes a mess all over his hand, body twitching as he watches cum spurt out of his cock.

Waves of pleasure flow through his body for a long moment, until it becomes too much and he has to stop. He lifts his forehead from where he’d pressed it to the edge of the bed and searches for Jeongguk’s gaze. His eyes are hazy but his lips are pulled into a lazy, satisfied smile.

He takes a deep breath, murmuring that he’ll be right back as he stands up. His legs feel weak, but he pushes through it and heads for the bathroom. He makes sure nobody is home yet, just in case and when he’s sure, he walks there, cleans himself up and pulls his sweats back up before searching for a towel.

Jimin comes back with it and slowly makes his way towards Jeongguk. He’s rolled onto his back, but the pillow is still covering him up and his eyes are closed, long hair a mess around his head. He’s so beautiful. He doesn’t even seem to hear Jimin coming up to his side. He startles when Jimin touches his sweaty forehead, eyes opening to look at him.

His cheeks are still flushed, but he seems happily sated. With a smile, Jimin lifts the towel up.

“Should I…” he trails off, unsure of what lines he can cross right now. They’ll talk now, he knows that, but he still wants to ask first. “Is it okay for me to clean you up?”

Jeongguk seems shy all so suddenly, as if he didn’t just see Jimin jerk off while he was humping his own pillow. Ah, Jimin is so endeared. He knows that he’ll never be able to look at Jeongguk in the same way. He hasn’t been able to since that night and his feelings have slowly morphed into something so hard to ignore. He won’t ignore it any longer, not if Jeongguk feels the same way about him.

“Okay,” Jeongguk finally whispers, reaching for the pillow with tiredness in his movements.

So, Jimin cleans him up. There’s nothing sexual left around them, but it’s intimate in a way that has Jimin’s heart beating so fast the whole time. He feels warmth spread across his chest when Jeongguk hisses upon Jimin brushing over his cock. Sensitive. Jimin stores that in his brain for later, as well, even though he’s been fully aware of that since the second he came into this room.

He puts the towel aside and asks Jeongguk if he wants to cover himself up. Once more, Jeongguk hesitates, but he finally nods and asks Jimin to hand him over boxer briefs. He knows Jeongguk’s bedroom like the back of his hand, so he finds them quickly and hands them over. Jeongguk puts them on and discards his sweaty shirt, throwing it to the ground.

It’s Jimin’s turn to hesitate. He shifts on his feet. He won’t pretend he doesn’t want to slide onto Jeongguk’s bed and settle down at his side because god knows it’s something he desperately wants right now. He’s always been protective of him, but right now he’s feeling that more intensely. Maybe it’s because of what they just shared.

“We have to talk now, I know,” Jeongguk mumbles, sitting up for a second. He seems tired, but also hyper aware of his surroundings. He’s looking around, playing with his fingers, nervous. “I just want to say that…we’ve been best friends for a long time and we’ve always been very close, so…you can still do what you always have. You can lay down with me, hyung. I don’t ever want that to change.”

Jimin smiles at Jeongguk’s words. He never wants that either. His reassurance makes Jimin give in. He reaches for the pillow to put it on the ground. They both act as if Jeongguk didn’t just completely cover the fabric with cum and instead, Jimin crawls into the bed and settles down next to Jeongguk. They don’t lay down. They sit next to each other, legs crossed, bodies close.

Even though he’s been sweating a lot and wishes he could also discard his clothes, he wants to make sure that they’re both fully on the same page before doing anything that might be wrong somehow. Of course, a part of him just wants that so he can touch Jeongguk and feel him against his skin at some point. Maybe they’ll get to that. Hopefully.

“That was probably the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen in my life, Jeongguk-ah,” he begins. Jeongguk looks down at his lap, where he’s playing with his fingers nervously, still. “I liked it a lot. I enjoyed it so much.”

Jimin looks sideways towards Jeongguk, watching his reactions closely.

“I liked it too,” he responds softly. And then his lips pull up into a smile. Jimin has seen Jeongguk smile so many times, but for some reason, right now, it makes his heart race. “I’m still a bit shocked and confused about how he got here, but I don’t regret it at all, hyung. I…” he trails off, seeming hesitant again.

“You…?” Jimin prompts him forward, reaching out and placing his hand on Jeongguk’s. He squeezes reassuringly and then plays with his fingers.

“I like you,” Jeongguk confesses.

“I like you, too,” Jimin blurts out.

Somehow, confessing it out loud makes it so much more intense than he thought it would. He’s known for a while now, he’s been dealing with those feelings for the past weeks. But telling Jeongguk is something he didn’t think he’d be doing anytime soon.

“So, then…” Jeongguk begins, sliding his fingers in between Jimin’s, gently, softly. It feels nice. It also has Jimin’s belly filling with warmth. “We can do this again?” He asks.

Jimin hums. “Thinking about it again, already?”

Jeongguk groans at his teasing, but he’s smiling, he seems less hesitant and much more relaxed. Jimin is glad. Even though he was feeling nervous himself, he’s content with being next to Jeongguk and talking, that everything is fine even though they’ve stepped over a line they probably will never be able to come back from.

“I meant, be with you,” Jeongguk whispers. “Not do just this, also…other things. And kiss, too,” he explains softly.

Jeongguk is so intense whenever he’s on stage, most of the time, even when they’re all alone. But then sometimes he’s also so shy and gets overwhelmed with the smallest of things. Jimin has grown used to all of these constant changes, but right now they make him want to soothe Jeongguk, to give him anything he wants.

“I like kissing,” he murmurs, a little bit in teasing, but also telling him the truth. “I want all of that, too. We can explore this together, hm? See where it goes? No matter what happens, though, I want to make sure that we’re always both on the same page and that we’ll always talk, that we’ll be there for each other.”

“Yes, hyung,” Jeongguk quickly says, excitement taking over his voice. “I want that, too. No matter what happens, you will always be my best friend. And yes, we should talk. We should make sure to share what we’re okay with, what we don’t like. What we want―”

“Oh, I know a lot about what you do like, Jeongguk-ah,” Jimin whispers, leaning into his space, grinning when Jeongguk’s lips part and his cheeks turn the softest shade of pink. “You love soft fabrics because they feel nice against your skin and apparently you also like it because it feels good against your cock, hm? And when you’re horny, you get so desperate you just use the first plushie you can find, aren’t I right? Did I never pop into your mind when you started humping the plushie I gifted you? Not even once?”

Jeongguk groans loudly.

“Don’t make me horny again,” he pleads, biting down on his lower lip for a moment, taking a deep breath as if that will make him calm down. “Yes, you did. That’s why….when you said you’d seen me, it was harder to stop thinking about it,” he explains. “I liked soft things before I discovered that I also liked…how they felt when I was, you know,” he goes on. “What about you, hyung? Is it that you’re into watching? Does it turn you on seeing me get lost in pleasure on my own?”

Jimin scrunches his nose. They’ve both always teased each other like this, but it’s making it hard to keep his dick in check. He sure as hell doesn’t want to get hard again. Not when both of them are tired and the guys will surely come back soon.

“Well, I didn’t know until I saw you, but I’m pretty sure it has everything to do with how sexy and beautiful you are,” he responds, letting go of Jeongguk’s hand. “And how desperate you get, how loud you are. I like you a lot,” he finishes off with a soft whisper.

Jimin turns his body fully towards Jeongguk and reaches for his face. He places his hand on the cheek that isn’t facing him and makes Jeongguk turn his head towards him. Their eyes meet. He shows Jeongguk a reassuring smile and leans forward slowly. Jeongguk doesn’t push him away, so Jimin keeps going until their lips slot together softly.

Jeongguk’s lips have always been plump and so pink, Jimin never thought they’d feel like this when pressed to his own. So soft but also firm. As almost everything in life, Jeongguk is great at kissing. Once he gets over his initial shyness, he takes over in a way that has Jimin struggling to keep up. Not because of the pace, but because he kisses deeply, he kisses with so much emotion.

He makes it hard for Jimin to breathe properly, he makes his head spin and his body relax. He makes him want to be closer. Slowly, they shift and fall back, bodies pressing together as they lay down sideways and struggle to hold onto each other in whatever way they can feel closer.

Jimin hooks his leg over Jeongguk’s hip, sliding one hand over his waist and towards his back. He brushes upwards, fingertips trailing up Jeongguk’s spine. Jeongguk’s hand also moves, settling on Jimin’s hip and tugging him closer. Jimin wants to feel more of his skin. This is why he wished he’d undressed, because he wanted to feel all of Jeongguk.

But now that he’s here, he doesn’t want to move away, he just wants to keep enjoying this closeness and the feel of Jeongguk’s lips against his own. They fall asleep at some point, but Jimin is perfectly content with having Jeongguk’s arms around him and his forehead pressed to his own.

↢↣

For a couple of months, they keep finding time to be alone. It keeps happening, Jeongguk humping his pillow and Jimin watching him while jerking off. Sometimes they just kiss and kiss until they’re both riled up and get each other off. They explore it together, just like they agreed to. With Jeongguk, everything just feels so…perfect.

If Jimin had known things could be so easy and natural between them, he would have probably realized sooner that what he felt for him wasn’t just wanting to take care of him, be there for him as his best friend, someone he could confide in. He would have realized that, deep down, he also wanted Jeongguk to look at him with those big eyes and excited expression whenever Jimin sneaks into his room. He also wanted Jeongguk’s ‘i like you’s’ and his smiles and his touch.

Now that he gets to have it, he feels like the happiest person in the whole world. Nobody gets to see Jeongguk like this but him. So he always wants to make sure that he’s happy.

So, naturally, as Jimin grows to understand just how deeply his feelings run, he decides to formally ask Jeongguk out. He does so when they’re cuddling one day, him on his side and Jeongguk as well, pressed to his chest and hugging him tightly. He cards his fingers through Jeongguk’s long and wavy hair strands, placing a kiss to his head.

“Would you like to go out with me, Jeongguk-ah?” He asks. “Like, what do you think about dating? I’m sure about what I feel and I want that with you, i want to be with you, if you want me too.”

Jeongguk lifts his face from its hiding spot, looking up into Jimin’s eyes.

“Yeah, I’d like that, hyung,” he replies quickly. “I’m sure about what I feel, too.”

Jimin smiles and cups his cheek, leaning down to place a kiss on his exposed forehead, hair still brushed back. He hums. “My Jeonggukie.”

Jeongguk’s lips press to Jimin when he’s still in the middle of smiling and for a while, they make out lazily, smiling widely and making each other laugh.

So, they start going out. They have dates―which isn’t so weird considering they’ve always gone out a lot together―and continue to sneak into each other’s rooms whenever they get some time alone to enjoy much needed intimacy.

Because of their hectic lives and schedules, they don’t really have all that much time to do what they want and meet people. But Jimin hadn’t realized how much he needed someone else's warmth until he and Jeongguk started this whole thing. It’s one thing to have your friends that are like a second family to you, close and always making you feel safe. Yet it’s something entirely different to have someone to slowly fall in love with, to go out with, to take care of you in a much more intimate way.

Jimin didn’t realize at first how quickly he was starting to fall for Jeongguk, but the second he did, he let it happen without any fear. The only change that there’s been in his relationship with Jeongguk has been the added sexual intimacy, the kissing, the touching. They’re still best friends and he knows he can trust him in so many ways, the same way Jeongguk can rely on him. So, this time around, he doesn’t shy away from it.

He shows Jeongguk with every touch and every smile and every shared whisper in the middle of the night.

It’s not that long after that they finally give in to what their bodies have been craving the more time they’ve spent together. It’s a day when they’re alone, the dorm is empty except for them and they had agreed to make the most of the time together, watch a movie, cuddle in bed, maybe take a long nap.

Somehow, that doesn’t happen. Jimin isn’t sure which one of them gets horny first but one moment they’re just sitting together in Jimin’s bed, kissing softly and being very much whipped for each other and suddenly their bodies are pressing closer, hands tugging at the other.

“God, Jeongguk. We’re such a mess,” he mumbles as they roll around on the bed, finding a new position to make out in.

Jeongguk is currently on top of him, Jimin’s legs spread to let him settle there comfortable. He pulls at his shirt, sliding one hand under it and touching the soft skin of his back. Muscle clenches under his nails as he scratches at the skin and arches his back, exposing his neck for Jeongguk to nibble on.

They’ve been careful with not leaving marks―although Jeongguk did walk around with a hickey Jimin made on his neck a couple of days ago, saying it was a bite he’d made because he wouldn’t stop bothering him. They’re having way too much fun playing with fire. When Jeongguk sucks on his skin a little too harshly, he just moans into his ear and slides his hand further down.

It’s mindless, the way his fingers slide under Jeongguk’s sweats, under his boxer briefs and settle on his ass cheek. God, Jimin definitely has a thing for his ass. Honestly, he has a thing for all of Jeongguk. His muscles, his body, his eyes and the way he smiles.

He gasps when Jeongguk’s hips grind down, making pleasure bubble in his belly. He kneads at Jeongguk’s ass cheek, also grinding up to meet him halfway. They settle for a messy pace, getting lost in the feeling for a moment. Until Jimin’s fingers move the slightest too close to Jeongguk’s hole and he makes this loud sound that has Jimin’s body freezing.

But Jeongguk protests and licks into Jimin’s mouth.

“Hyung,” he breathes out, nibbling on Jimin’s lower lip and sighing deeply. “Touch me,” he whispers.

Jimin fists the back of his shirt with his other hand and lets his fingers tease in between Jeongguk’s ass cheeks, smiling to himself when Jeongguk groans and nods mindlessly, even though Jimin hasn’t said anything.

“Like this?” He asks against his mouth. Jeongguk isn’t kissing anymore. His mouth is hanging open against Jimin’s, his mind fully focused on Jimin’s finger brushing over his hole teasingly. This is a first for them, but it still feels so natural, it happens so easily. They just let their bodies guide the way. “Want me to put my fingers inside you? Do you―”

“No,” Jeongguk interrupts, shaking his head and leaning back to look into Jimin’s eyes. He stares back in confusion, but Jeongguk goes on before he can ask what’s going on. “No, I―there’s something else I want,” he blurts out.

Jimin tilts his head to the side.

“What do you want, baby?” He asks. “I’ll give you anything you want, always.”

Jeongguk sit up slowly and Jimin follows, a bit taken aback by Jeongguk’s sudden actions. But Jeongguk just inches closer, thighs moving over Jimin’s and arms wrapping around him tightly. He burrows his face in Jimin’s collarbone and sighs deeply.

“I want you to fuck me, hyung,” he breathes out. Jimin’s heart stops. He’s more than fine with that. Not that he wasn’t planning to do that anytime soon. But he’d been more than willing to wait for both of them to be ready for that step.

“Are you sure?” He asks. Jeongguk nods immediately and Jimin bites down on his lower lip to prevent himself from grinning. “I’ll fuck you, Jeongguk-ah,” he whispers, sliding his hands under Jeongguk’s shirt and touching his heated skin. “I’ll make sure it’s all you can think about for days.”

Jeongguk leans back with a shy expression all over his face. It’s so endearing. Jimin cups his cheeks and pecks his lips. It’s then that Jeongguk’s mouth breaks out into a smile.

“Now, hyung?” He asks, leaning forward to kiss the corner of Jimin’s mouth. “Will you fuck me now, please?”

He’s pleading, but his lips are teasing Jimin, making it hard to focus. His hands too slide under his shirt and touch his skin, trailing up and up, making his heart beat race.

“We have time,” he murmurs, voice husky with desire. They do. As long as nobody decides to come home earlier than expected. “We can―”

“But, hyung,” Jeongguk interrupts, looking into his eyes with this sinful gaze. Jimin knows that he’s going to say something that will fuck with his head even before he does so. And yet when he does, it still makes his body turn hot with arousal. “I want you to fuck me hard and fast,” he murmurs. “I want you to pin me down,” he goes on, leaning forward and placing a kiss to the corner of Jimin’s mouth.

Jimin’s brain is suddenly filled with ideas. So many of them take over him. He reaches for Jeongguk’s cheeks and makes him stop moving, looking into his eyes.

“You can’t say that and expect me to not lose my mind,” he mumbles. “Is that how you like it? Want me to pull your hair and fuck you so hard you won’t be able to walk tomorrow without remembering how it felt?” He asks, smiling to himself when Jeongguk whimpers, hands reaching out to fist Jimin’s shirt and tug him closer. “We have a busy schedule tomorrow,” he adds, but he’s mostly mesmerized by Jeongguk right now, his eyes following his every move.

“Doesn’t matter,” he replies, pecking Jimin’s lips slowly, taking his time to lean in again. “I wouldn’t mind being sore...I like it as long as it’s with you, hyung. I just really want you to fuck me,” he says, eyes closing as if he’s overwhelmed. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it ever since I…” he trails off, growing shy and suddenly pulling his hands back to cover his face with a groan.

Jimin laughs, endeared and reaches out to circle his fingers around Jeongguk’s wrists.

“Ever since you what?” He asks. “Come on, tell me. I’m very curious here, Jeongguk-ah.”

Jeongguk scrunches his nose cutely as he lets his hands drop. Jimin plays with his fingers and tilts his head to the side, waiting for him to speak up.

“I imagined it,” he whispers. “When I was using my pillow, I just―I saw the plushie and it reminded me of you and I thought about you fucking me,” he blurts out.

Because Jimin wants to tease him, because he finds it so cute, he smiles warmly and places his fingers on Jeongguk’s jaw, brushing over his skin gently.

“So, you humped your pillow without inviting me over?” He asks, shaking his head. “I can’t believe you left me out like that, I’m a little offended, Jeongguk-ah.” Jeongguk rolls his eyes, but his cheeks are a soft shade of pink and his expression is very much lustful. He’s distracted, that much Jimin can tell. He wonders if it’s because he’s thinking about it again, about Jimin fucking him. God, just knowing that Jeongguk has been imagining that is making his mind spin.

“I was very horny,” Jeongguk breathes out, arms hanging around Jimin’s shoulders, face pressing under his jaw. “It made me realize how badly I always want you, hyung.”

Jimin’s heart jumps in his chest. Jeongguk is always saying things like these that have Jimin’s heart going crazy. He likes Jeongguk so much he doesn’t know how he never realized before this all started. He swallows down the lump in his throat and slides his fingers into Jeongguk’s hair.

“I always want you, too,” he murmurs back. “I’ve thought about it a lot of times, too.”

Jeongguk perks up at that, his lips pulling up into a grin.

“Then, fuck me, hyung. Come on, I want you,” he murmurs, leaning forward to kiss Jimin again.

This time, it’s messy and desperate, urgent. They don’t take their time at all. They don’t have a pace, they can’t keep up with each other. Their tongues swirl around each other, trying to gain control, but also giving it up easily as the other catches up.

They take each other’s clothes off just as urgently, tugging and pulling, throwing them across the room in their desperation to get each other naked. When Jeongguk reaches to take his shirt off, Jimin stops him, placing his hand on his. Jeongguk looks back at him with confusion.

“Can you keep the shirt?” He asks softly, already knowing what Jeongguk looks like with it bunched up ver his waist and having an idea of how much of a turn on it’ll be to see it from even closer.

Jeongguk smirks, of course he does. He leans forward to whisper into Jimin’s ear. “Do you like it that much?”

He doesn’t have to say what he’s talking about for Jimin to know what he’s referring to. They both know. They’ve grown to know a lot about what they like, after all.

“You know I do,” he whispers back, tilting his head to the side so he can brush his nose under Jeongguk’s jaw. “That’s why you always keep it on when you hump your pillow so desperately, putting up a show for me. Will you do that today?” He asks. “On your knees? Do you want me like that? Or should I―”

“Yeah, yes,” Jeongguk is quick to jump in. “Hard and fast, hyung,” he urges him, kissing his lips quickly and taking off his boxer briefs.

Jimin watches him turn around and get on his knees, pulling a pillow to his chest and hugging it tightly, cheek pressing to it as he looks back towards him. It’s hard to look at his face when his ass is right there on display for him. Even though Jimin has seen Jeongguk’s back arched before as he humped his pillow and desperately rutted against it, this is different. Jimin didn’t even know Jeongguk was this flexible. Knees digging into the mattress, back arched perfectly, ass up, Jimin has a mini panic attack before he realizes that he’s just sitting there, staring.

Jeongguk snorts and turns to look forward again, shaking his ass teasingly.

“Come on, hyung. Don’t just stare,” he pleads. “Do something, I want you.”

“God, I want you too,” Jimin blurts out, standing up and discarding the rest of his clothes. Once he’s fully naked, he smiles at Jeongguk’s eyes following him around as he goes for lube and a condom. “Like what you see?” He asks, as he makes his way back onto the bed and crawls onto it behind Jeongguk.

He’s in the very same position, just waiting for Jimin to actually have his way with him and it’s fucking with his head too much. Jimin is already getting hard just by looking at him.

“You’re so hot, hyung,” is Jeongguk’s response.

Jimin gets up on his knees and places his hands on Jeongguk’s ass cheeks, squeezing experimentally. Of course, he’s touched several times before, but this all feels so different knowing what’s going to happen.

“You’re hot,” he replies softly, almost distractedly. “Look at you, displayed just for me. You make it so hard to hold back, Jeongguk-ah,” he finishes in a whisper.

“Don’t hold back,” Jeongguk begs, something he’s asked Jimin so many times before. Jimin still remembers the very first time, when Jeongguk invited him over to watch him after they talked about Jimin accidentally walking in on him. “You know I never want you to.”

Jimin nods. He takes a deep breath and reaches for the lube. He’s nervous. He figures it’s because Jeongguk is so important to him and he wants this to be great for him. But also because he’s thought about this so many time before. He’s jerked off to the thought of it so many times before. He wants Jeongguk very badly and he still can’t quite believe that he’ll get to have him in a moment.

Gently, he brings his lubed up fingers in between Jeongguk’s ass cheeks, brushing over his hole teasingly. A gasp leaves the younger one’s lips and his hips push back, as if seeking more. Jimin is more than ready to give everything to him. When his fingers circle his rim, Jeongguk shakes his head, lifting it from the pillow to speak. “I already prepped,” he whispers into the silence of the room.

Jimin still reaches for his ass cheeks, spreading them and making Jeongguk groan.

“You already had this all perfectly planned out, huh?” He asks, teasing, even though he’s seconds away from losing his sanity. He’s aware that he’s staring and Jeongguk’s hips are squirming, pushing back against his hands but also pulling away after a moment. “You even prepped. Good. That means I get to fuck you sooner.”

Jeongguk makes a soft sound of approval and Jimin is quick to slick himself up with the lube on his fingers. He groans at the feeling of pleasure that takes over his body slowly, his cock responding to it immediately. He’s hard within seconds, reaching for the condom to put it on. He’s breathless just with this. He’s once again worried he’ll end up making a fool of himself because he’s so turned on just by having Jeongguk like this. Jeongguk isn’t making this any easier for him, desperately telling him to hurry up and put it in already.

Jimin makes sure to spread more lube over his cock and moves closer, positioning himself perfectly behind Jeongguk. He takes a deep breath and lines his cock up to Jeongguk’s hole. Tentatively, he pushes his hips forward. As the head of his cock pushes in, both of them groan loudly and god, Jeongguk is so tight. He’s so tight that when the head of his cock finally pushes past the ring of muscle, he has to pause and take another deep breath, body trembling with pleasure.

He closes his eyes, hands gripping Jeongguk’s hips tightly.

“Fuck, you’re so tight, Jeongguk,” he breathes out shakily. “Holy shit, I need a second.”

Jeongguk whines, clenching around him. Jimin hisses and squeezes at his hips to stop him.

“But I want you so much, hyung,” Jeongguk mumbles, head tilted back the slightest bit. “I can’t wait any longer. You feel so good. Stop teasing me and fuck me.”

So demanding. Jimin looks down, giving himself another second because being inside of Jeongguk feels far too heavenly for him to stay sane.

“You just―it feels so good,” Jimin blurts out. “You feel so good, Jeongguk-ah.”

Jeongguk hums. “You feel good too, hyung,” he replies quickly. “You just―ah,” his words break out into a loud moan as Jimin pushes further inside, meeting no resistance. He goes slow, even though he wants nothing more than to thrust fully into Jeongguk once and for all.

It’s probably a bad idea with how sensitive he is right now, but he enjoys it nonetheless, the way Jeongguk’s walls open up to him, warm and tight. His eyes flutter closed as he continues to push in, marveling in the way Jeongguk whines and pushes back in an attempt to get him fully in faster. Jeongguk has always been like this very eager bunny, not that much of a patient guy. Jimin is desperate too. He’ll get to moving as fast as he wants in a moment. His need to fully focus on this first moment is much stronger.

He bottoms out with a deep sigh, warmth spreading from his groin to his thighs, up his belly and towards his chest. His whole body is hot within seconds, the feeling of Jeongguk’s ass right against his hips making his head spin. He realizes he’s gripping Jeongguk’s hips too tightly and stops, brushing his fingertips over the spots where he just dug his fingers, leaving back marks that will surely be darker and more noticable tomorrow.

Good. Even though both of them are mindful of it, they love marking each other up.

“You know, you really are like a bunny,” Jimin whispers, smoothing his hands over Jeongguk’s ass cheeks, squeezing and spreading them, unable to keep his gaze away from Jeongguk’s rim stretched around him. It looks as tight as it feels. It’s hard to breathe. It’s harder and harder to hold back. “Always so eager, always jumping around. My bun,” he finishes in a whisper, smiling when Jeongguk whines and pushes his ass back, making pleasure tingle in Jimin’s lower belly. “Do you like that?” He asks.

“I like being yours,” Jeongguk is quick to reply. “I want to be your bun. I want to be your everything. Everything, hyung. Please. Please, I just really―” he’s once more cut off by Jimin’s movements, a gasp leaving his mouth because Jimin pulled back and thrust back in sharply to give him what he knew he’d ask for.

“I’m yours, too,” he murmurs, slowly sliding back again. “All yours, Jeongguk-ah. I’ll give you what you want. I’ll fuck you hard and fast, I’ll make sure you’ll never be able to forget about it.”

When he thrusts forward again, Jeongguk moans so loud Jimin’s belly fills with arousal again. He’s torn between looking down to where he’s thrusting into Jeongguk and looking up to see the rest of Jeongguk’s body. But the latter ends up winning because he’s still wearing his shirt and just like Jimin was hoping for, it’s bunched up above his waist, a beautiful contrast to his beautifully arched back, the thin layer of sweat covering his skin making it glisten in a pretty way.

Jimin likes the way Jeongguk’s body shakes and joggles forward with each of his strong thrusts. He likes how Jeongguk has shoved his face into the pillow because he’s being so loud. There’s nobody around to hear him but Jimin, but the sound of his muffled moans are somehow even more of a turn on when he’s the one who’s causing them. It’s been a while since he’s had sex, but nothing can ever compare to this.

Because of their busy life styles, he’s never been with someone he actually likes, someone he wants to be with for a long time. He’s had hook ups, quick one nightstands that were never satisfying enough. It’s nothing like this. It’s nothing like being with Jeongguk, someone he feels so much for already, someone he cares about so deeply, someone he wants to continue seeing, someone who he wants in his life for a very long time...forever, no matter what happens.

Somehow, the thought makes pleasure tingle up his spine and a gasp leaves his mouth, hips stuttering for a moment, losing their pace. He knows Jeongguk wanted it like this, hard and fast. He’s given him that for a while, but he wants to feels his body against his, he wants to touch him more. He’s already half exhausted, but the pleasure and the desire are more.

He bends forward, pressing his chest to Jeongguk’s back, pressing his hips to Jeongguk’s ass and moving them in circles as he lets his body lean over Jeongguk’s. The younger one doesn’t protest. If anything, he whimpers and clenches around Jimin, knees giving in, sliding towards the sides as his hips start to fall to the mattress. The second Jimin has fully laid him down on the bed, he starts circling his hips harder, making sure to thrust upwards every couple of seconds, making Jeongguk’s body twitch and moans leave his covered mouth.

He slides his hands up Jeongguk’s arms, his forearms, his hands under the pillow, holding it tightly. He intertwines their fingers and stretches Jeongguk’s arms up, pinning his hands to the mattress. The pillow remains under Jeongguk’s face, but Jimin doesn’t mind it. He lets his lips meet Jeongguk’s skin, kissing his shoulder, towards the crook of his neck. He sucks there, even though he knows he can’t leave a mark. They won’t get away with saying it’s a bite, not a second time.

He still teases Jeongguk about it. “Do you think anybody will believe you if I mark you up and you say it’s just a playful bite again?” He murmurs into his ear. “Want to walk around with a hickey on your neck, letting the whole world know that I did it? That I’m the one who gets to have his lips on our body, that gets to see you like this, so desperate to be fucked?”

“Hyung,” Jeongguk blurts out, hips pushing up even though Jimin’s body is keeping him pinned down in this position. “Hyung, hyung. So good,” he mutters mindlessly. “I like it like this. It feels even more―” he stops, moaning loudly when Jimin stops moving his hips in circles in favor of just pushing them forward, never really pulling out, but yes making his cock drag against Jeongguk’s walls, searching for that spot inside of him that he knows will make him fully lose control.

“Intense?” Jimin asks, eyebrows furrowing when he feels his orgasm start to build in his belly. He’s not surprised that he’s already close and the sensitivity is making his hips jerk more, thighs trembling with pleasure. “I know. I like it, too,” he whispers, pressing his forehead to Jeongguk’s shoulder blade. He takes a deep breath and tries to start up a pace again, squeezing his fingers so hard around Jeongguk’s that he’s sure it must hurt.

But Jeongguk is squeezing back just as hard, struggling to move even though he knows he can’t in this position. It doesn’t take long for Jimin to realize that he’s gone oddly quiet, body just moving with abandon. So Jimin lets go of one of his hands and holds Jeongguk’s chin, turning his face to the side. He sees his mouth hanging open, pleasure all over his expression, eyebrows furrowed.

His lips pull up into a smile as he places a kiss to Jeongguk’s jaw.

“I don’t know why you were asking for hard and fast when we both know you like it better like this,” he murmurs, teasing him riling him up. Jeongguk whimpers, tightening around him, making Jimin hiss with pleasure. “You like it when it feels this intense. That’s the reason you’re always taking it slow, right? Because you like feeling like you’re so close but never enough to fully reach the end,” he goes on, trailing kisses down Jeongguk’s neck until he’s on his shoulder again, nibbling gently on the skin. Jeongguk looks forward again, unable to hold back his moans, but Jimin keeps his hand where it is.

“I do,” Jeongguk blurts out. “I like it so much.”

Jimin hums and places a kiss to the spot he was just biting. “Are you close?”

Jeongguk nods mindlessly and Jimin moves his hand again towards Jeongguk’s, once more having him fully pinned down. He shoves his face into the crook of his neck and starts picking up the pace of his movements, thrusting into Jeongguk quickly, sharply, skin slapping against skin. The sound is obscene, but it’s only making Jimin grow more and more turned on.

His orgasm has been building for what feels like a lifetime, but Jimin tries to hold it back because he wants Jeongguk to cum first. It turns into a race, Jimin holding back, goosebumps arising all over his skin and Jeongguk moaning loudly, face buried in the pillow as his body begins to shake.

Jimin can tell when Jeongguk cums because he gasps and tenses up, he stops moving all together, clenching so tightly around Jimin that it pushes him over the edge. It washes over him so pleasantly that he groans and keeps his hips pressed to Jeongguk’s ass, unmoving, letting it take over. Only when the first waves go by does he circle his hips slowly, drawing it out for both of them. Since they’re both so sensitive, the movement makes them moan softly, bodies jerking each time. Even then, Jimin keeps going, because the pleasure is so intense that he never wants it to fade away.

After that, it feels like they’re both floating. Jimin smiles widely as he rolls off after a couple of minutes of just breathing together and calming down. He discards the concom and brings back a towel for both of them to properly clean up. He slips under the covers with Jeongguk and hugs him tightly, bodies properly spent, lazy smiles on their lips.

“Hyung,” Jeongguk whispers, pressing his face to Jimin’s chest, an arm draped over Jimin’s waist.

He always slides further down so that he can settle comfortably in Jimin’s chest, so Jimin cards his fingers through his messy and wavy hair.

“Hm?” Jeongguk doesn’t say anything, he shakes his head and presses his face deeper into Jimin’s chest. “Are you sleepy?” He asks. “We still have time, so you can sleep, Jeongguk-ah.”

Jeongguk nods slowly. But then he looks up and their eyes meet.

“Hyung, I’m so glad you walked in on my humping my pillow,” he mumbles, his eyes quickly closing because he’s clearly too tired.

Jimin laughs, shaking his head. It’s true, though. He’s glad too, because it led to this, it led to them.

“Yeah, I’m glad too, bun,” he whispers, placing a kiss on Jeongguk’s forehead. “You make me so happy.”

Jeongguk mumbles something that sounds like ‘you make me happy, too’ but Jeongguk snuggles into his chest and slowly starts to drift to sleep. With a smile, Jimin also closes his eyes and buries his face in Jeongguk’s hair. He doesn’t care that they’re both naked and falling asleep. He’s sure that, at this point, at least some of the guys must know that they’re together. Especially Taehyung, who’s been giving him this ‘I know what you’re doing’ face for a while now.

Jimin isn’t worried about that. He knows it will all turn out perfectly because they’re a family. Even if this potentially changes thing, what they have is irreplaceable, they love each other and support each other. That’s why diving into this with Jeongguk wasn’t scary and will be something he’ll never regret.