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Leslie and Ben had been avoiding each other since the damn day Leslie found out the moment was perfect for launching her city council’s campaign.
It was painful. It was painful seeing the desire and need and longing they felt for each other. Andy could barely stand in the same room as them… the awkwardness was too much to take. Even Andy knew how hard that must have been for them. April always had her emotions well inside her, but deep down, it was becoming kind of hard not to feel sorry for them.
Everyone saw the same Leslie every single day. Trying to act like she always did. Accomplishing everything she put her mind to. Ann watched Leslie go to innumerable meetings, she even went to some with her. They all saw Leslie smile and laugh and keep conversations. But they all also saw her at the end of the day. They saw her with her head down on her table. They heard her sighs. They saw the real feelings when the lights were dimmed down. Ron, specially, noticed how she never talked about the beauty of the flyers anymore. He noticed how Leslie’s eyes did not shine like they used to when he announced there was going to be another town hall meeting and she was going to have to represent both of them. She always went, of course, but she spoke the minimum. Suddenly, it was like it didn’t matter if things got done in 20 minutes or 7 hours. Everyone knew how Leslie would rather be 7 hours in those occasions.
Ron never showed a lot of feelings, but he felt. He missed Leslie. He missed the over the top good mornings, he missed the enthusiasm about a new jungle gym on Ramsett Park that Leslie could never shut up about. Ron, even passed by Leslie’s house a few times at night hoping to see all lights on, only imagining the amount of work she was doing. Things were different now. The lights were always out past 11. That bothered him. It made him angry and sad. It made him question their decision. It made him even have hope that Chris and voters wouldn’t think their relationship as bad at all. For once, Ron thought about meddling into something that wasn’t his business.
But he never did. He never told Chris. He never spoke about his feelings to Leslie. What he did was take her every single day she wasn’t with Ann for a giant pile of waffles. Sometimes they would sit in silence. Other times he really stepped out of his comfort zone and chatted with Leslie about government. She seemed so out of her senses she didn’t realize Ron wasn’t completely against her on every subject.
**
Ann was Leslie’s best friend (and possibly soulmate – she said that a few times) but she played an important part on Ben’s life too. She liked Ben. Ben was not like the other guys and that was clear for Ann before it was clear for Leslie herself.
Leslie insisted on one favor from Ann so much and for so long that she sometimes thought she was suffering more than they were. But that was not possible. She knew that. Anyway… The day Ben and Leslie broke up, Leslie spent the night at Ann’s. She cried rivers that turned to seas and then to oceans. And by she, I mean Ann. Leslie cried so hard she actually passed out in less than two hours. But Ann kept her words. Leslie repeated them like a chant.
“Ann, it’s not his fault nor is mine. It’s just bad timing. Please, please, please… take care of him. Don’t forget he exists. Don’t let people lose touch with him. He has only Chris. And Chris doesn’t even know about all this mess. Please. Take care of him.”
Ann did. Her life was a constant between sneakily meeting Ron in his office while Leslie was away and tell him next Tuesday he should take her to JJ’s because she was meeting Ben and Chris for breakfast in Snerling. Yes. She went this far just to take care of him. Also, obviously, because it was a good excuse for Chris to go to that healthy store she doesn’t remember the name.
All of them spent a month trying to avoid the inevitable. Keeping them from each other. By the 17th day, things were starting to feel lighter. They crossed paths a few times. They exchanged shy, sad smiles. Each of them cried after the 3rd beer. Leslie cried on the way out of the Bulge and was woken up the next morning with waffles and two cans of whipped cream. Ben cried with his forehead pressed on the Snake Hole Lounge’s counter. The next morning, Andy made fun of him. It was insane how connected they were.
**
Then, it came the end of the world.
“Seems appropriate”. – Ben said while handing her the newspaper.
“Every year is the same thing. Zorp never comes. He’s like a bad boyfriend”. – Leslie said taking a sip of her coffee.
See what just happened? Things are looking up! They can be friends.
But also, no. No one was ready for what was about to happen that night. Not Leslie. Not Ben. Not even Ann or Ron.
They all gathered at the park. The night was calm and beautiful. There were so many stars on the sky. Leslie would look over her shoulder and see Ben talking to Chris and wish with all her soul she could be lying on Ben’s chest on the cold grass. Laughing… pointing to the stars that seemed so close but were so far. Just like them. Bodies bumping into hallways, hands an inch apart. But so far and distant. So many feelings left unspoken. So many kisses caught on their imaginations.
Shauna came to interview Leslie about the possible appearance of Zorp. She asked the question that were important for the newspaper. But she also asked the important questions, for her.
“He’s cute. Is he single, do you know?” - Shauna
“Chris? No. He’s actually dating Jerry’s daughter.” - Leslie
“Oh no, sorry. I meant Ben. What’s his story?” - Shauna
There it was. The end of the world as we know it. No one feels fine.
“Who?”
“Ben.”
“I- I don’t know. I’m not sure.”
Leslie rambled on for much longer, but you get the point. She watched Shauna make her way to Ben and Chris. She saw the moment Shauna made the move.
Shauna Malwae-Tweep touched his arm. She did it. She knows what she’s doing. Oh, boy. The actions that unfolded because of this situation are hard to describe. The jealous monster took over Leslie’s body like she never felt it before.
Ann saw the whole thing unfold and approached Leslie trying her best to stop her from doing something stupid. She knew it wouldn’t work, but it was her duty as best friend.
“I know how this goes… they’re gonna have sex in five minutes!” – Leslie said unable to keep her body from moving.
“Leslie, you know the reason you’re not dating him anymore is because you decide to run for city council…” – Ann said afraid of coming out as too harsh. But it didn’t. Leslie didn’t hear a word she said.
“So what? Just because I can’t go out with him someone else can?” – Leslie.
Let’s be fair, she did have a point. It was Ben. BEN! The one she used to touch. She touched his arms, she touched his chest and she remembers vividly all the times she had to hold onto the back of his neck, feeling his hair, hearing him breath deep in her ears.
And now, someone else would have these stories to share over brunch. Shauna would tell her friends about how she met a guy and his body was pale and how her nails left marks all over his back. Shauna would hear her name coming out of his mouth late at night. Her sweaty body would lay on the side of his, her hands running through his chest. Ben would press his lips against Shauna’s and whisper “I love you” while holding her body down the bed with the weight of his own. She would say I love you back in a perfect rhythm of words and moans and hips. This would all happen in a matter of minutes according to Leslie.
She had to stop them.
**
With the lamest excuse possible, Leslie found a way of breaking Ben and Shauna’s conversation. Ben got into the passenger’s seat of her car and they drove for about 40 minutes. Leslie totally forgot about this part of her plan. When she said she needed to show him something, she forgot she actually had to go somewhere. They found themselves in an old gas station. Probably owned by Mick Jagger. The leading singer of the Rolling Stones… you know him.
Her words were barely audible. Ben broke the uncomfortable silence between them, although Leslie wished he didn’t.
“I know what you’re doing Leslie.”
“I’m showing you a part of rock and roll history.”
“You can’t do this. You know, we broke up and I kind of feel like we shouldn’t hang out together, just the two of us. Because every time we do, it just… makes it harder. You know?”
“Okay… okay”
Ben left. She wasn’t sure how he vanished so fast since she drove them there, but her mind was a mess. Everything felt fuzzy and wrong. It was cold and she felt one single tear fall from her eyes. That was it. The words that were never spoken between them. Leslie knew their relationship was fading and it was because of Ben. She could be friends with him. But he didn’t feel the same. She never picked up on that, but it was clear now. All the times Ann tried to tell her, the times Ron agreed with her just so he didn’t break her heart. Those were the signs she avoided.
She sat on the cold dirty ground for some minutes before finally heading back to the park. The end of the world was near, as deputy director of the parks and recreation department of Pawnee, Indiana, she had to be there.
**
Leslie’s eyes searched the park like an eagle. Ben wasn’t there. Neither was Shauna. It sank to her heart like stone. She avoided the tears and headed to where Ron was, playing his flute, while Zorpians chanted to his tunes.
“Can I speak to you about a personal matter?” – Leslie asked with her hands shoved in the pockets of her vest.
“Normally, no. But… given there’s only 20 minutes until the end of human existence, also, no.” – Ron replied, trying to cheer her up with a joke.
“I lost my mind tonight. I tried to screw up even the potential of Ben dating someone else.”
“Did you not hear me when I said no?”
“Oh, we broke up because of me. But I have to tell you, Ron… if the world was ending tomorrow, I’d want to be with him.” – Leslie said.
You could almost hear the amount of strength she had to pull to form these sentences. There were tears on the corner of her eyes, but she kept her smile, in case one of the other people looked at them.
“Well, that’s significant. The problem is, Leslie, the world is not ending tomorrow. The sun is going to rise right over there. It will be a regular Friday, and you will be in the exact same position you were in before.” – Ron tried not to sound so harsh.
“I know. It’s just the thought of him with someone else is making me miserable.”
**
The world did not end, in fact. At least not the world itself. The sun rose beautifully right where Ron pointed out it would. You could see the rays of sun passing through the leaves of the trees, you could feel the almost instant warmth of the majestic bright sun hitting the skin.
Leslie’s eyes cleared, she felt lighter. It was like she finally understood that that was it. The romantic part of her relationship ended. She couldn’t stop him from meeting other people and falling in love. She always knew this, deep down. But she brushed those thoughts off of her head whenever she thought about Ben.
It was time to go home. She could still hear Herb swearing this was the right date and somehow, he must have misread the signals. She packed everything up and loaded the trunk of her car, she sat in the driver’s seat and tapped her fingers on the steering wheel. She bit her lip and fought her subconscious about the need to apologize to Ben on the first hours of the morning. She wanted to apologize, but she wasn’t ready to see Ben’s post sex face, with his hair all messy and his lips all cute. She couldn’t stand the pain. But she did, anyways. She drove to Andy and April’s house and knocked heavily on the door.
“Shauna Malwae-Tweep thinks you’re cute.” – Leslie said with her breath fogging the door’s glass.
“What?” – Ben said, still more asleep than awake.
“That’s why I took you to Mick Jagger’s abandoned gas station. Because she thinks you’re cute, and I was afraid you guys were gonna make out and have babies, and I had no right to do that to you or your future children. And it wasn’t until just now that I realized the romantic part of our relationship is over. So… I’m sorry. And, uh… why don’t you tell Shauna to make herself decent and I’ll apologize to her as well.”
“Oh, Shauna is not here.”
Leslie smirked with Ben’s statement. Her heart felt a little bit unbroken.
“Oh…” – Ben said smiling at her.
“See what I did? I’m very sneaky.”
They both laughed willingly. It was like things were natural again and they would go out for breakfast and Ben would clean her cheek with his finger while talking about how amazing it would be when Leslie was in city council. Time felt slow and neither of them seemed to be uncomfortable like a few hours ago at the gas station. But it hit Leslie.
“Well, I- uh… I have to go.” Leslie said avoiding Ben’s eyes.
If time seemed to have stopped seconds ago, now it felt like the hours were seconds and clocks had no meaning. Ben grabbed Leslie’s arm just as she was heading out of the door. He rolled her body until she was facing him, bodies pressed against each other. He was holding her tight and their faces were apart by a thin line.
Their breaths were heavy and Leslie’s palm was pressed against Ben’s chest. She could feel every beat of his pounding heart, it felt like his heart was ready to rip his chest open. Leslie knew Ben was strong but she had forgotten about how tight his hands could hold her steady. His eyes were closed and his fingers were digging through her skin, holding her pulse while her hand was still unmoving from where his heart was beating so fast.
Leslie pushed the front door closed with her foot, the sound of the door closing invaded Ben’s ears and he opened his eyes. Leslie was looking at him. Her eyes were never so ocean like. Her lips were never so pink. Her hair never smelled this good. This moment had been played on repeat on Ben’s imagination for so long, he was unable to move. It felt like a single move would break his mind and he would realize it was nothing but a dream.
“Ben…”
It was real. He was hearing Leslie say his name in the way only he knows she does.
“Leslie…”
Their foreheads touched and their breaths mixed together. Ben felt Leslie’s eyelashes closing and her chin slowly moving up. Soon enough, their lips met and they kissed each other tenderly like they’ve never spent one single minute apart. Ben let go of Leslie’s arm and she crossed her arms on the back of his neck while Ben put both his hands on the side of her hips, lifting her up. She crossed her legs against his waist and Ben moved their kiss into his bedroom.
He gently put her on the bed, breaking their kiss to take off his shirt. Soon again, he was on top of her. Kissing her lips, biting her earlobes, running his hand throughout her sweater.
Leslie kept her hand on the side of his face, feeling his unshaved beard and caressing the back of his head. Every time their lips disconnected she gasped for air and smiled not even realizing she was doing that. She kept her hand moving from his face, to his neck, to his chest. She missed how lean his body was. She missed the warm of his hands touching her skin while his mouth tenderly kissed every bit of her body.
They had no intention to make this quick. Actually, their intention was to keep this moment going on forever. Ben touched Leslie’s skin from beneath her shirt and slowly helped her take them off. His long fingers pressed against her ribcage, lifting her back so she could take the sweater off easily. Every piece of skin that appeared was met with a kiss from him. He kissed her hip bones first, trailing her stomach, sucked on the skin of her ribs, passed through her breasts, kissing her collarbone, making his way to her neck where he left light hickeys, breathing her perfume, kissing her jaw, ending on her lips again. Mouths parted, tongues twirling against each other. Their taste was one again.
Leslie took off her bra and let it fall on the floor. She sighed with Ben’s touch cupping one of her breasts while slowly moving his sloppy kisses to her other nipple. Her back arched and she had a smile on her face she tried to hold it down by biting her bottom lip. Ben played with his tongue against her hard nipples and moved his hands to her hips, reaching the button of her jeans. He unzipped her pants and she jiggled them out while Ben’s hand pressed against her butt. He moved his hand from her butt to her knee, holding her leg up, kissing her belly and taking her panties off with his free hand. He kissed her legs, he licked the back of her knees, he gripped on her thighs and licked his lips locking eyes with Leslie.
“I missed you. I missed your body. I missed your smell. I missed your kisses. I missed your voice. I missed the way you taste… I missed you, Leslie Knope.”
Ben always looked at Leslie like she was a painting made in heaven when they were making love. His eyes were full of desire, but you could always see the love. He touched her so gently like she was made of glass. Like the smallest force applied would break her. Like she was porcelain. His fingers kept wandering around her belly and her breasts while Ben’s mouth moved closer to her pussy, he was kissing the sides, kissing all over her. He opened his way with his tongue, making Leslie instantly moan and shiver. He moved slow, teasing her, licking her middle, circling her clit, touching her skin. He slid a finger inside her painfully slow. Every move Ben made had been evenly calculated and executed with perfection. His bedroom felt like an opera. A symphony of Leslie’s moans, sighs, heavy breaths. She said his name and it was like music to his ears. He would look at her, arching her back, nipples hard against her own fingers, her left hand holding the bedsheets tight. Her eyes rolling and almost fully closed.
He laid on top of her, letting his weight down, kissing her again. Ben loved how Leslie tasted when they kissed after he went down on her. He stood on his knees, taking off his pants and boxers. He pressed his cock against Leslie’s pussy, slowly stroking himself before sliding in.
He was inside her, moving his hips slow, holding his hand on the side of her face while his other hand pinned her arm against the bed. They were looking at each other in such an intimate way, they knew no one could do it but them.
“You are so beautiful. You know that, right?” – Ben asked her before kissing her lips again.
They stayed moving their hips on the same rhythm for a while, when Leslie was starting to build up her orgasm, Ben parted their bodies and started circling her clit with his finger. Leslie was moaning and repeating his name over and over again, eyes rolling back, arching her back and tightening her grip on the bedsheets. Ben’s breaths were caught on his throat and he was suddenly sweating more than their bodies were already.
Leslie reached for his arm and pulled him close to her body, breathing into his ears, digging her nails on his back, clenching herself on him. Her other hand pressed against his chest just like the beginning of this morning.
“Kiss me.” – She said in between breaths.
Ben did as told and glued his lips on hers, their bodies completely tangled together, their sweat becoming one, their skin feeling like lava touching in every part.
They came together. The room fell silent and they could almost hear their hearts beating on the same pace. Their bodies were still connected, still full of love for each other. Still dripping desire.
“Some days I feel like this is impossible to handle, you know? Some days I feel like seeing you will kill me. I can’t stand not touching you. I don’t like coming home alone. Sometimes it feels like… I don’t know. Life’s not fair. It got me here. It sent me to this town, it presented you to me. And then… the world ended. At least mine did.”