Chapter Text
The remainder of the month couldn't pass by fast enough for Kazuya, but he managed to make it through, finding himself back in Rei's office.
The bespectacled woman behind the desk, after their perfunctory greetings, simply handed him a folder, and Kazuya immediately perused through it.
Through the papers within, he read that one Sawamura Eijun was a resident of Nagano prefecture and was married to one Sawamura Wakana, née Aotsuki, his childhood sweetheart. At that, though he wasn't surprised, Kazuya couldn't help his lips pursing in bitterness, his stomach feeling as though it was sinking deep down while a sense of possessiveness filled him. But he read on, finding out Sawamura's statistics of height, weight, blood type, and age. The next pages held his result from his most recent medical check, a requirement for their application for the program at their local parenthood agency. It indicated that Sawamura was very, very not pregnant (and Kazuya couldn't help but frown at the pang of disappointment that shot through his chest, because really, it was something that he had expected based on his and Rei's talk a month ago and therefore was not something he should feel upset over). Both Sawamura and his wife had applied, and their applications had been transferred to the main Tokyo branch since there was a better pool of options of what they were going for.
Kazuya let loose a deep exhale as he closed the folder, handing it back to Rei. He tried to convince himself that he should feel relieved—and really he was, it was just extremely delayed, but any minute now he would be filled with elation because he wasn't going to be a father any time soon.
Rei's voice cut through the silence. "With this," she indicated the doctor's check result, "you no longer need to file a formal case against Sawamura-san, right, Miyuki-kun?"
Unable to sort out his churning thoughts, Kazuya found himself simply giving her a perfunctory nod.
"Congratulations, then, Miyuki-kun."
Although his throat was dry, Kazuya simply gave her a hoarse, "Thanks, Rei-chan," then he rose. "I'll see myself out."
All through the trek out of her office and out of the building, all he was filled with was a sense of bereftness that he couldn't contain or explain. Telling himself he was happy that the worse had come to pass and that this ought to serve as a lesson that he should be more careful about recklessly sleeping around couldn't shake the disappointment and feeling of loss. Now, there really was nothing that was tying them together. Well, other than the mark, he thought ruefully as he scratched at the persistent ache on his shoulder.
It wasn't as though Kazuya believed in the notion that there was the one true mate for every Alpha and Omega. The times had changed and there was no room for old fashioned ideas like that anymore.
But still, it was rankling that he was still left with one last reminder that he wasn't entirely as free as he used to be.
Since the Sawamuras' application had been transferred to Tokyo, that meant that sooner or later they would find their way back to the city. With the mark, it would make it easy for him to sense whether Sawamura Eijun was nearby. All he could do was wait for that time, then.
Close to seven months was how long it took before Eijun and Wakana found themselves taking the train back to Tokyo, having received a summons from the main branch of the parenthood agency that cited that they had found a few Alpha candidates that met their criteria. Eijun felt as though he would've been fine if Wakana had gone first; after all, finding a Beta sperm donor for her wouldn't be as grueling as it was for him, but she had opted to wait for him. Over the past months, they followed the procedure that had been set for them: wait patiently for the agency to find them matching candidates and set the necessary appointments for both parties to meet. If the meeting was a success wherein both parties found themselves compatible and agreeable, then Eijun would have to start taking the heat-inducing pills that were prescribed to him—since his own heat cycle was so irregular that it couldn't be counted on to happen at the right time—so he could go into a scheduled heat and they could mate.
On the seat beside him, Wakana was perusing through the files the agency had sent to them. On the page was the headshot and stats of one Takigawa Chris Yuu.
"He's quite handsome, ne, Eijun?" said Wakana, looking up from the file.
Eijun turned his head from the window and peered at the file on her lap. "A foreigner?"
"Only half-foreign."
"I guess he's..." Eijun tried searching for a word. Nice? Cute? A little too mature-looking and doesn't wear glasses? He frowned at the last thought. It wasn't as though he had a type or anything so he didn't know where that came from. When the pause became too long, he opted instead for: "Good-looking?"
"I bet he'd make really pretty babies."
Eijun felt himself becoming flustered as an image was conjured up in his mind of what kind of babies they could make. Feeling faint, he shook his head to disperse the image from his head. It would've been nice, he admitted, except... He took a deep breath, wrinkled his nose at the thought that was about to begin to form at the forefront of his mind about wanting to have a certain someone else's babies. Except nothing, he admonished himself.
He cleared his throat. "Maybe. I guess we'll see."
"You don't like him?"
"N-no. He's cool. He's okay."
"But?"
"What?"
"You're not feeling it?"
"Feeling what?"
"Like any of these—" she waved the file folder, "—could be The One?"
"..."
They stared at each other. Wakana was giving him a knowing look edged with pity. There were times when he wished she didn't know him too well because he could feel the weight of their history together in that stare. And it wasn't just their history: there was also the knowledge that no matter how much they loved each other, and swore to be committed to each other, there was always the sense that an Omega and Beta could never truly have the same connection that an Alpha and an Omega could have with each other. That there would be a missing piece that neither could fulfill for each other.
So for her to have the awareness that his own heart was straying, that it could never fully belong to her...
Eijun felt the prickle of tears behind his eyes, felt the stinging in his nose, and he couldn't look at her anymore.
"Hey," she said softly, reaching to cup his chin and turn his face back to her, her thumb swiping over his eyelids. "We're in this together. If none of these guys are right, then we'll just keep looking. Pictures don't really tell everything about a person, that's why we're meeting them."
He nodded, leaning into her hand against his cheek. "Yeah."
"And who knows, maybe you'll want to have his babies right then and there when you meet him. And I get to watch this time."
Eijun sat back, eyes round and wide, his momentary sadness immediately forgotten as he was left feeling scandalized instead. His mouth sputtered unintelligibly until he finally managed to exclaim, "Wakana!"
She laughed. "Hey, it's our baby. I might as well observe if I can't participate in making it."
"Oh my god!" Eijun covered his face with his hands, knowing just how red it was from the scorching heat he could feel through his palms. When he could still hear her giggling, he shouted, though it was muffled by his hands, "SHUT. UP."
He felt her hand ruffle his hair.
"It was your idea first."
"That was then! It's different this time!"
"Oh, so now you have issues with this guy but you wouldn't mind me watching if it was that guy you slept with several months ago."
He squirmed in his seat, peering at her between his fingers in disbelief. "Tell me again why the hell I married you?"
Wakana leaned forward and kissed the hands that were between their faces, affection evident in her tone of voice. "Because you're an idiot and you love me."
Eijun huffed, and kept his face covered with his hands the short remainder of the way.
Due to an injury that ended his budding baseball career, Kazuya had been drifting aimlessly. Other than going back to university, there really hadn't been much going on in his life since the one thing that had filled it was now gone. There were just the occasional parties and the occasional flings. And then occasionally bothering his few friends in their respective jobs. Like his former upperclassman in high school, for example, who opened his own sushi restaurant, and who, at that moment, was in the middle of making Kazuya his lunch.
"Did Jun-san really say that to you?" Kazuya was asking with a chuckle, watching his senior slice raw salmon and delicately set the strips on small domes of carefully packed sticky rice, about a third of the size of his palm.
The place was small, tucked in a little corner in an alleyway below a café. Past lunchtime was downtime for the restaurant, closing the place for some breathing space, opening up again by dinner, so for the afternoon only Miyuki was the sole customer.
"You know how he is with words," replied the chef as he selected tuna next, then proceeded to lay it out on the chopping board to be expertly portioned, his mouth curled up in amusement.
"Well, I am amazed myself. You're forgoing the whole process of dating and jumping straight to starting a family. I would've figured that you'd be a bit traditional and go to a matchmaker first or something."
"Well, in some ways, these family planning agencies are kind of like matchmakers," responded Chris, putting the finishing touches on Kazuya's plate before handing it over the counter.
Kazuya nodded his thanks, mumbling 'itadakimasu' and splitting up a pair of wooden chopsticks before digging into his meal. A look of delight crossed his face and he verbally expressed how pleased he was with his food, to which Chris bowed his head in thanks, before moving from behind the counter to sit beside Kazuya at the bar, bringing his own plate with him.
Whilst eating, Chris picked up the thread of their conversation, "At least with the agency, you already know that the other person or party actually wants to start a family. And that's really what I feel like I'm ready for: having children. With people who also want to have children. Finding a partner and committing to a marriage can always come later."
Kazuya hummed thoughtfully, reminded of the fling that effectively ended any desire of his to sleep around, and the initial steps he had taken the day after said fling. "But what if the other person or party don't want to have anything to do with you? Like, what if they only want you to be the sperm donor?"
Chris chewed pensively, then swallowed, having arrived at an answer. "Well, that'd be unfortunate, but I can always make the stipulation that I want to be part of the child's life. If the partner the agency found for me doesn't want that, then I can always wait for the next candidate."
"Well, it sounds like you've really prepared yourself for this." Kazuya held up his glass of beer. "I can only wish you the best in this next step you're taking with your life, Chris-san."
"Thank you, Miyuki." Chris lifted his own glass and clinked it against Kazuya's.