Chapter Text
Last time on total drama island…
22 campers have signed up to spend eight weeks at this crummy old summer camp then have to face the harsh judgement of their fellow campers.
“Calm down girl,” Leshawna told Gwen. “It probably won’t be that hard.”
“Aw [bleep] naw!”
——
(Cue intro)
——
“Ok!” Chris said to the campers, all in their swim clothes. “Today’s challenge is a threefold. Your first task is to jump off this 1000 foot high cliff into the lake.”
“heh, easy.” Eva said confidently.
“If you look down,” the host carried on. “You will see two target areas. The wider area represents the part of the lake we’ve stocked with psychotic man-eating sharks!” The host laughed at the nervous glances before continuing to explain. “Inside that area is a safe zone. Which we’re pretty sure is shark free.”
“Nu-uh, I need 1 double o percent bruh.” Geoff said angrily.
Chris ignored him and continued on. “For each member that jumps and actually… survives, there will be a crate of supplies waiting below. Inside each crate are supplies you’ll need for the second part of the challenge; building a hot tub! The team with the best one gets to have a wicked hot tub party tonight. The losers will be sending someone home. Let’s see, Killer gophers, you're up first.”
Gwen looked over the edge of the cliff and shuddered. “Ok, so who’s going up first?” She asked nervously. None of the team responded.
Izzy then walked up to them. “Don’t worry guys.” She said to the other team. “Shows like these always have interns do the challenges before we do. Can’t have a show if we’re dead am I right?”
——
“We need to test the stunts first.” Chris said to chef as he was dressed in swim trunks and a floatie. “You know that.”
“Do I look like an intern?” Chef asked angrily
“No, but the ones we had are in the hospital.” The host explained. “Come on just jump it, you big chicken. Bawk bawk!”
“I don’t get paid enough for this.” The cook grumbled as he jumped and screamed all the way down to the bottom outside the safe zone. “Hey.” The chef said in relief. “I made it. I made it man!” Said relief was short lived as he felt something on his foot. “Something just brushed off my foot! Hey Chris man! Something ain’t right down here!”
Chef was then pulled underwater for a moment before jumping out in a frighten state. “Down boy!“ he shouted as headed straight for land.
“Well.” Chris said, “That seems safe enough.”
——
“Alright,” Sadie said, “Who’s going first?”
No one answered until Leshawna sighed. “Alright, I’ll go first.” She said as she went to the edge. “Are you sure?” Gwen asked worriedly. “Well someone gotta make sure it’s safe right. Ok here goes.” Leshawna said as she jumped off and screamed all the way down.
Luckily for her, she landed in the safe zone and sighed in relief. “Ok! The safe zone seems fine. Y’all can jump now.” She shouted as she got on the boat for land.
“Well, here goes nothing,” Gwen said as she jumped off with a scream. Soon compilations of Cody jumping with a scream and Owen holding onto Noah for dear life as they landed to the safe zone.
Heather then looked down at the target zones. “I’m sorry, there’s no way I’m doing this.” She said while crossing her arms. “Scared of heights?” Teased Chris. “No I’m scared of dying.” The hipster replied. “It’s ok buddy,” Chris said to the girl. “Unfortunately, that also makes you a chicken. So you’ll have to wear this for the rest of the day.” Chris said as he put a chicken hat on her head.
“This is deamning.” Heather said angrily.
“Bawk bawk bawk!” Chris laughed. “Chicken’s path down is thataway.” He said pointing to an escalator. Heather sniffen and got on the escalator.
Harold was next and laughed all the way down, until he then hit his groin in the water. It took a lot of effort for the daredevil not to shout in pain. “I’m alright.” He said with a tear down his face.
“Ooh, hate to see it happen.” Chris said as Justin looked at Chris. “Excuse me Chris,” Justin said. “I have a medical condition.” Chris raised a brow, “What condition?” “It called common sense.” Justin answered.
“You can chicken out if you want, but it could cost the team the win.” Chris warned but Justin scoffed. “Please, half of those guys wouldn’t jump and even then, I’m not getting maimed for some team.” The bossy guy stated as he was given it and went to the escalator.
Trent was next and jumped down, outside the safe zone. Everyone was telling him to look out as two sharks approached him. Trent saw them but didn’t panic and said to them, “Sorry, If your looking for a meal I don’t think I’m suitable. You understand that right?” He asked them but the shark simply stared at him. “Is it cool for you to take me to shore?” The handsome guy asked and the sharks did so.
Sadie and Katie were the last ones on the cliff. “I thought this was going to be a talent contest?” Sadie asked. “Yeah, no.” Chris told her uncaringly. “Come on Sadie we can do this. You don’t want to let the team down do you?” Katie asked. “Well no.” The naive girl answered. “Well the only way to help is to jump. In fact We’ll jump together ok?” Katie said and Sadie nodded. On the count of the three they jumped into the safe zone.
“Ok that’s nine jumpers and two chickens.” Chris counted. “Screaming bass, if you can beat that, we’ll throw in a pull cart to put your crates on.”
“Ok, so who’s going first?” Lindsay asked.
“Don’t worry guys. It’s just a pool with angry sharks, I got this!” Bridgette shouted as she jumped off the cliff. A clang was heard as the camera showed that Bridgette crashed into a buoy, but luckily slid into the safe zone.
Beth laughed at the whole ordeal as Geoff glared. “Hey, that ain’t funny. She could be hurt.” He said as Beth smirked. “Who cares, just go jump already I’m outta here.” She said as she went to walk away but Tyler grabbed her shoulder.
“No way, In order to win we all have to participate. I ain’t losing because of some coward.” Tyler stated angrily. “I’m not a coward! I just don’t feel like doing it!” Beth said as she glared at the jock. “If you ain’t a coward then jump it [bleep]!!” Tyler shouted in frustration as Eva got in between the two of them.
“Enough!” She shouted at the two before recomposing herself. “Look Tyler, If Beth doesn’t want to do this she doesn’t have two. They have two chickens, we can spare one can’t we?” She said as Tyler sighed. “Fine whatever, but I’m winning this.” He responded as he jumped into the water with Beth blowing a raspberry at him as she got her hate and went down the escalator.
Izzy looked down the cliff. “You when I thought I would get on tv, I would be in a comedy show, not a show where I’d endanger my life.” She said somewhat nervously. “Oh how sad.” Chris responded uncaringly, “Now you gonna jump or you gonna be a chicken?”
Izzy then jumped of a cliff screaming, Eva jumped next as well as Geoff, Zeke, Duncan and Lindsay all jumped.
DJ and Courtney were the last two on the cliff. “Alrighty then, Let’s do this.” Courntey was about to jump but noticed DJ looking hesitant. “You comin?” She asked. “Oh, yeah. Just Uh, need to compose myself.” He said with fear in his voice as Courtney sighed.
“Look dude,” She said to the Boy Scout. “I get that this is, stressful situation. But we need to win this ya know.” She said but DJ still looked somewhat hesitant. “Look, We need to win this, after all what’s getting to a goal without a few obstacles along the way. You can chicken out if you want, but I’m going to go support my team, hope you make the right choice.” She finished as she jumped along.
“Alight DJ, you're the final one. If you jump this, your team gets the advantage, or they will all mock you for being a chicken. No pressure to it … Ok there’s a lot of pressure.”
[Confessional- DJ]
“I’ve always had a fear of highs since I was little. But I don’t want to let the team down either.”
[Confessional- Courtney]
“I’m really praying that he makes it. I really don’t want to cause a death over 100,000 bucks. I still hope he jumps tho.”
[Confessional- Beth]
“I’m just looking at the guy thinking we’re doomed. The big guy looked like he was going to stain his swim trousers at any moment.”
[confessional over]
“Remember, Chicken hat’s still here.” Chris said to DJ.
“Alright Devon.” He muttered to himself. “You can do this, Just uh, think of it as getting a badge, yeah a ‘you survived a cliff badge.’”
DJ then took a few steps back
“Time to get that badge!” He shouted as he ran and jumped off the cliff. He frantically screamed as he plummeted to the bottom causing a splash.
All was silent until DJ sprang up. “I’M ALIVE!! I MADE IT!!”
“Well, looks like with a 9-10 score, The victory goes to the screaming bass!!” Chris yells in a megaphone.
“Nice one dude!” Geoff said as DJ walked out with a proud grin.
The bass cheered as the gophers groaned.
[Confessional- Noah and Owen]
Welp, we’re screwed.” Noah said to Owen. “Come on little buddy, we can just lose hope now, I mean yeah we lost the first part, but that doesn’t mean we’ll lose the second part, we’re still in this.” Owen said to try and cheer up Noah.
“You are unbearingly optimistic.” Noah told him. “And that’s why we’re friends.” Owen responded. “Eh, fair enough.”
[confessional over]
The bass pulled their crates with ease as the group sang happily. “49 bottles of pop on the
wall, 49 bottles of pop,” They sang, “Take one down, pass it around, 48 bottles of pop on the wall.”
The gophers weren’t doing so well.
“Can all hurry up?” Justin asked with great haste. “We need to make it to the campgrounds before the fish do!”
“We know ya cocky bastard,” Cody said snarkily. “Your help would be much appreciated!” The camera zoomed out to show everyone except Justin pulling a crate.
“Yeah, where the heck is your crate?!” Heather asked angrily. “I gave it to Harold.” He responded as the camera cut to Harold pushing the two crates with some difficulty. “Onwards to victory!” He encouraged himself as he kept going.
Leshawna sighed. “Look everyone, stop arguing amongst yourselves. We ain’t gonna win by fighting each other. Let’s just do this challenge and hope that we are at least able to make it.” She told the team. “And who made you leader?!” Justin asked. “Well she’s doing better than you.” Gwen muttered as she pushed her crate along.
“Stupid crate, stupid challenge, stupid is- Ow!” Heather shouted. “Stupid splinter!” She said in frustration.
“Excuse me?” Sadie asked. “Can I go to the bathroom?”
“We’re already behind! You want to slow us even further?” Heather asked in frustration. “Alright, but please be quick about it.” Leshawna replied as Sadie ran to the woods.
—————————————————————
The bass still sang as they pulled the crates along as they got to the destination.
“Alright looks like we made it.” Duncan said to the others. “And we made it in pretty good time too. We're winning this.” Courntey said smiling.
The bass had gathered all the crates and went to open them. But Chris had stopped them.
“Did I forget to mention that you can only open the crates with your teeth?” Chris asked in a mocking tone.
“No, you just decided not to tell us.” Lindsay said in response.
“Come on people, we’re making good time, how hard can it be?” Geoff told everyone as he started to bite on the rope. He got the crate open but he squealed in pain as his rope burnt his tongue. “Ow, darn it.”
The others started to do the same as they got out the materials.
—————————————————————
During this the gophers finally got to the site. “About time you guys got here.” Chris criticized them, “What took you so long?”
“Oh just a few complications, we’re good now right everyone?” Leshawna responded looking at the team and everyone nodded, some genuine, some reluctantly.
“Alright but remember only your teeth.” Chris told them.
“Alright it seems that we’re still in this.” Justin spoke to the rest. “Since I have led multiple teams in the past, I will take charge in the hot tub any objections?” He asked as everyone stared at him
“Want a list?” Heather asked.
“No one asked you, hippie!” He shouted as Heather glared. “Well I’m not following some bossy, Lazy, INCOMPETENT SLACKER!” Heather shouted in response.
The two then began to go at it as the others looked on. “Should we try and stop them?” Trent asked. “No, Let’s just get to building, we’ve wasted enough time as it is.” Katie responded with a frown as she went to open the crates and the others followed suit.
By the time Chris arrived the bass hot tub looked pretty good, it was nice and sturdy, good temperature and looked good with a few sketches from Lindsay.
“This is a rockin 'hot tub.” Chris told the team.
The Gophers was, while not terrible, definitely rushed as it was a lot more flimsy and wrecked looking. He poked and after some groans, held together.
“Not bad but not good enough. The winners are the screaming bass!” Chris announced and the bass cheered. “Bass, you're safe from elimination and you get to rock this awesome hot tub for the rest of the summer! Bonus!”
“Awesome. High five teammate.” Geoff said to Tyler. Tyler rolled his eyes but returned the high five with a smirk.
“Killer gophers, what can I say?” Chris said to the losing team. “It sucks to be you. Better get to deciding cause tonight, one of you is going home.”
—————————————————————
“Welp, I’ll be the first to say it, this was a disaster.” Gwen said as the camera cut to the gophers sitting in the mess hall.
“Uh, so what now?” Owen asked.
“Now we need to decide who to vote off.” Trent told the others.
“Well this shouldn’t be too difficult, it should probably be either the cocky bastard or Hen-ther.” Cody said.
“What, why?!” Justin asked angrily.
“Well you two are the only ones with chicken hats and you argue with each other constantly. In my humble personal opinion, we should keep the hot chick.” Cody responded, with Heather giving him a scowl.
“Well maybe we should vote off you, you are the weakest team member here. Can we really depend on someone like him in the physical challenges?” Justin said.
“Well at least he doesn’t scream all the time.” Heather snorted. “Last time I checked, I’m not the only one here with a chicken hat Hen-ther.” Justin responded with a scowl. “Get your own insults.” Cody said in response.
“Look, this is getting way too violent.” Leshawna said to calm down the three bickering teammates. “Let’s just call it and vote for the others on our own.”
“Leshawna does give off a good point. Are we all in agreement?” Katie asked as the others nodded their heads , all except Justin.
“Can’t believe I got stuck with a lousy team!” He finished as he stormed off before anyone could say anything else.
—————————————————————
The gophers all sat at the campfire with Chris standing in front of them.
“Killer gophers,” Chris started, “at camp, marshmallows represent a tasty treat that you enjoy roasting by the fire. In this camp, marshmallows represent life.”
Owen looked rather nervous as Noah patted his shoulder to calm him.
“You have all cast your votes and made your decisions. There are only ten marshmallows on this plate. When I call your name, come pick up your marshmallow. The camper that does not receive a marshmallow must return to the dock of shame to catch the boat of losers. That means your out of the competition, and can never come back, …ne-ever.”
This only made the gophers even more nervous.
The first marshmallow goes to … Leshawna, Trent, Gwen.” The three happily got their marshmallows.
“Noah, Owen, Harold.” The three climbed to gain their marshmallows with Noah giving his to Owen as his best friend happily munched away.
“Cody, Katie.” The two got their marshmallows.
“and Sadie.” Chris finished as Sadie smiled and claimed her marshmallow.
“Campers, this is the final marshmallow.” Chris said as Heather and Justin nervously looked at the marshmallow and back to each other. “The final marshmallow goes too…” the camera dramatically panned to the two of them as the music tensed until Chris picked the lucky one.
“…Heather.” Heather breathed a sigh of relief as Justin looked on with a shocked face. “What, I’m out?!” He shouted at the host.
“Ain’t too surprising to be honest. Dock of shame is thataway.” The host responded.
Justin breathed heavily but calmed down and glared at his former teammates. “You’ll pay for this.” He said as he walked towards the dock. “The rest of you, enjoy your marshmallows, you're all safe, for tonight.”
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[Confessional- Courtney]
“Alright, so far so good. If this keeps up I'm so winning this thing. I had doubts but we pulled through. Hopefully this continues.”
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“Alright I think we can all agree,” Geoff said in the hot tub with the others while holding a glass. “That today was a massive success. To the screaming bass.”
“The screaming bass.” They all shouted as they all celebrated.
—————————————————————
[Confessional- Katie]
“Am I saddened by the fact that we lost?” She told the audience. “Eh not really. As long as it’s not me I don’t care much for who’s going home. I’ll run this game no matter what. I’ve already got started with Sadie, It’ll grow from there.” She said with a dark grin as the camera faded to black.